“You have a concussion and bumps and bruises.”

  “Mmm-hmm. And I’ll bet you’re as hard as—”

  “Attention all visitors. Visiting hours are over in five minutes,” a shrill voice from the intercom echoed.

  Max groaned again.

  “Saved by the hospital administration,” Deena said with a light laugh.

  “I love you,” Max said suddenly. Just like that he’d had to tell her, to say it again. He really loved this woman.

  “Good. Because I love you, too.”

  Chapter 16

  “I’m fine, Mama,” Deena said as Karena adjusted another pillow behind her back two days later.

  “I just don’t think you should be working. You’ve just been through a terrible ordeal,” Noreen was saying.

  “I know and I’m not technically working,” Deena argued.

  Karena was the first to give in to her incessant requests for her laptop. Deena hated for her emails to build up and after two days of not checking them, she was sure her inbox was a nightmare.

  The doctor, a top neurologist, who also happened to be the cousin of Alex Bennett, had insisted she stay in the hospital two days for observation. Deena felt like she was about to lose her mind. She wanted to go home. No, she wanted to get out of this hospital and go on that dinner and dancing date that Max had promised her.

  Yes, Max was still in New York, to Deena’s great delight. He’d stayed hours at the hospital with her every day. Taking Monica’s advice, they hadn’t talked at all about his condition or his reservations about their relationship. She hadn’t wanted to destroy the time they had together. Besides, none of that mattered to her anymore. All she knew was that she was in love with Max, a loyal son, a generous lover and a great man.

  “She won’t be on long, Mom. Dr. Bennett says he’s discharging her at noon,” Karena said.

  “Does Max know that?” Noreen asked.

  Monica sighed. “Of course he does. He’s been interrogating that doctor every day, ten times a day since she’s been in here. I doubt there’s anything he doesn’t know about Deena’s condition at the moment.”

  “I like him,” Karena said. “Sam says he and Adam have built a really good business.”

  “I know his mother’s very proud of him,” Noreen offered. “I talked to her last night and she couldn’t stop talking about the place he fixed up for her in Hilton Head. Said they’re all heading there in a couple of months for the grand reopening.”

  “Yeah, Max said it’s scheduled for Fourth of July. I think it’s going to be great,” Deena said, pushing the button and waiting for her computer to boot up.

  “So when are you leaving?” Monica asked from her chair near the bottom of Deena’s hospital bed.

  “Leaving?”

  “Aren’t you going back to Las Vegas with your man?”

  Nobody spoke. Noreen gave Deena a worried expression. Karena fidgeted with the blankets on Deena’s bed. Monica’s legs were crossed, her nails drumming over her knee. As for Deena, she looked away from all of them, focusing on her computer and typing in the log-in to her email. “Nobody’s said anything about me moving to Vegas.”

  “Hmph,” Monica said.

  “It’s too soon to think about a big move like that. You’ve been through a terrible time—you need time for yourself to get over what happened.”

  “That,” Deena said with positivity, “I am so over. Just like I told Cole Desdune and the New York police, I don’t need any counseling. I know it wasn’t my fault that Kevin was a crazy stalker. There was nothing I could have done differently. He’d already fixated on me before I even went out with him.”

  At least that was how she felt on the outside. On the inside, she admitted to herself that the entire episode still had her a little shaky. But she’d never been one to give in to emotional breakdowns or fears that were big enough to overtake her. She’d misjudged Kevin Langley. It was unfortunate, yet she was blessed to be alive and to have not been assaulted sexually. For that she was grateful and would not hinder that gratitude with regrets.

  “I know, sweetheart, but still it’s trying to be brutally attacked and almost violated,” Noreen insisted.

  “It is, but I’m just not going to dwell on that. I have my family close by and that’s all that matters.”

  “That and having your man close by, too,” Monica added. “How long is he staying since you haven’t talked about your move to Vegas?”

  “Okay, Monica that’s enough. She said they hadn’t talked about that,” Karena said.

  “Hadn’t talked about it doesn’t mean she isn’t thinking it. You are thinking about moving all the way to Vegas with him aren’t you?”

  It was an accusatory tone, which wasn’t new coming from Monica. But Deena really wasn’t in the mood for it. Besides, what she and Max decided or when they decided it was her business. “I’m not talking about this with you.”

  “Fine.” Monica uncrossed her legs and stood. “I have work to do back at the gallery. Karena, I’m sure you do, too.”

  “We’ll just stay until Max arrives,” Noreen said.

  Monica shook her head. “I’m leaving.” She moved past her mother to give Deena a brisk kiss on the forehead. “Be good. I’ll come by your apartment tonight to check on you.”

  And she would, Deena thought. Monica enjoyed checking on her, the little sister. But she couldn’t be mad at her for it, refused to be at this point. Because if Monica hadn’t stopped by to check on her Lord only knows what Kevin would have done to her unconscious body. When Monica arrived she’d had to hit him in the head with the DVD player to get him off of Deena. She hit him one too many times and knocked him out cold, then she’d called the police. So, from that moment on Deena vowed to be forever grateful for her big sister’s interference in her life, at least marginally.

  “See you later,” Deena said, not bothering to look up because she could already hear the heels of Monica’s shoes clicking across the floor.

  “Sam and I will stop by, too. Is there anything you want me to bring you?”

  “A hot dog with mustard and relish and a grape soda,” she said automatically.

  Karena chuckled as she mimicked Monica’s motions of kissing her sister’s forehead.

  “You don’t have to stay, Mom. I know you have a lot to do with the foundation stationed here and up and running,” Deena told Noreen.

  “Since when has anything in my life ever been as important as my girls?”

  “Never,” Deena answered. “But there’s always a first for everything. Besides, I know it’s not that business is more important. But you’ve all been here around-the-clock with me. I’m fine. Kevin’s in jail and Dr. Bennett’s taking good care of me. Now, go.”

  Noreen hesitated a moment. “You don’t have to tell me when I’m not wanted,” she said. “You be good until I see you tonight.”

  Unlike the other two, Noreen kissed her daughter’s cheek before leaving. “Love you.”

  “Love you, too,” Deena said then sighed with relief when she was finally alone.

  But that relief was short-lived as she opened an email…from Max.

  The room was empty when Max walked in and his heart did a stop and stammer. He looked around, saw her bag and purse on the chair but didn’t see Deena. Dr. Bennett had just signed her discharge papers, but the nurses assured him that they hadn’t been down to pick her up yet. So she should still be here. But where?

  His questions died when he heard a door opening. With great relief he walked toward the bathroom where she was just coming from. “Don’t scare me like that,” he said. “I didn’t know where you were.”

  “And you cared?” Deena asked, staring at him as he approached.

  “Of course I cared. I know you want to break out of here but I don’t think you’re well enough to be traveling by yourself. So here I am to pick you up and carry you home.”

  Deena walked around him. “No thanks.”

  “What? Is something wrong, Deena?”

  She zipped her bag and turned back to face him. “No. There’s absolutely nothing wrong. In fact, I think right here, right now is the first time in months I’ve thought clearly.”

  He looked puzzled, she thought, but couldn’t muster up enough strength to care. “You wanted us to be over. Your email said so. I’ve never been in the habit of begging men to be with me. So you can go on about your business.”

  Max frowned, opened his mouth to speak, then thought better and clamped it shut. He’d forgotten all about the email he’d sent the other night, just before he’d gone into his drunken slumber and before Monica had called to tell him about Deena. All he could think about now was that he had to tell her he’d changed his mind.

  “Listen to me, Deena. That was a mistake. It was before Monica called me and I was feeling down and missing you and—”

  She held up a hand to stop him. “And it doesn’t matter. I can read and I think I can interpret your meaning fairly well. You said we shouldn’t see each other anymore, that I should stop trying to fix an unfixable situation because it wasn’t worth it. Well, you know what, Max? You’re absolutely right. You’re not worth it!”

  He wanted to reach out to her, to hold her, wrap her in his arms and just hold on. But he knew that wasn’t going to work. Deena was angry; that email had changed everything they’d built in the last two days. They loved each other, had admitted it openly and he was actually going to talk to her today about the possibility of her moving to Las Vegas with him. That didn’t look like it was going to happen now.

  “I was a senior in college when it happened. We were at this end-of-the-semester party, me and a couple guys getting drunk. The party was just letting out and we were a few of the last to leave. As we were walking out the door we could hear a female screaming. So we went back, looked through the house until we found where the noise was coming from. Four guys were attacking her, trying to rape her,” Max said the words, a lump forming in his throat. This was part of the reason he’d been so afraid for Deena when he’d heard what happened to her. The memories of how Trisha Linwood had looked sprawled across that bed, her clothes torn, bruises all over her pale body. It had been enough to almost push Max right over the edge. Instead he’d held on to the fact that Deena was safe, she hadn’t been raped and she was with him. Or at least she had been.

  Looking at her now, Max wondered if confessing everything even mattered. She was so angry, but more hurt. He could tell by the proud set of her shoulders. Yet the dim light in her normally laughing eyes gripped his heart more.

  “We didn’t think, just started to fight. They’d hurt her so badly all I could think about was hurting them just the same. In the end, there were a total of about twenty guys fighting. After a while I didn’t even know who was on which side. When it was all over, I was being rushed to the hospital. Two days later when I awoke and could stay awake and out of pain long enough to talk to the police, one of the doctor’s gave me my prognosis. It’s called genital tract obstruction. Apparently I suffered a lot of trauma to the genital area. It seemed ironic that because I’d tried to defend a woman’s honor, I would never be able to father my own children.”

  Tears glistened in her eyes but she hadn’t moved, hadn’t spoken a word.

  “It’s not an excuse, Deena. I don’t have one for the way I’ve acted. But I know now that I was being foolish. What we have is too precious to let go. You made me see my condition in a whole new light. Your compassionate suggestions of alternative ways to have children made me start to think that having a family might just be possible. I just don’t want it to be too late for us.”

  She inhaled, her fingers shaking at her sides. “You see your condition in a whole new light now. You don’t want it to be too late. This was never just about you, Max. That’s the first mistake you made. A relationship consists of two people, working together to make it work. For some reason you thought it only took you. I was never even a player in your mind. Maybe it was my age. Maybe I am the naive scatterbrain my sister calls me. I don’t know,” she said then took a deep breath. “What I do know now is that I’m sick of it. I don’t have to sit on the sidelines waiting and hoping you’ll say we can stay together. I don’t have to fight for something that only one of us really wants.”

  “Baby, I do want this,” he started.

  “No! I won’t do this anymore. I so wish you would have trusted me enough with the truth six months ago, it might have made a difference. But not even those unfortunate circumstances or the devastating outcome will make me go back to the state of limbo you want us to live in. I deserve better. You told me that, remember?”

  He did remember. He remembered everything she’d said he put her through. She wasn’t lying, he’d done all those selfish things and then some. She was absolutely right and he didn’t blame her for the stance she was now taking.

  But that didn’t mean he had to like it.

  “Just let me take you home.”

  “I can get a cab.”

  “No. I told your parents I’d be taking you home and that’s what I’m going to do. After that we can play this any way you want.”

  She was shaking her head. “I can’t…I just can’t do this.”

  Max moved around her, picked up her bag and handed her the purse. “Let’s just get you home. Then I promise I’ll leave you alone.”

  Deena looked up at him as if she didn’t believe him. She didn’t trust him. That look hurt Max more than any injury ever could. But he took it, because he deserved it and so much more.

  “I promise I’ll leave you alone so you can get better.”

  He had no idea how he was going to leave her alone for any length of time. But it was time Max stopped thinking about himself. She was hurting, probably physically and emotionally now, and a part of that was his fault. He wouldn’t make it worse, no matter how much he needed her right now.

  This was no longer about him.

  An hour later Max stood at the door to Deena’s apartment. She was hesitating he knew, staring at the door like this was her first time here. Or like it was a place she didn’t want to be.

  “I can take you someplace else if you’d like,” he offered taking a tentative step closer to her.

  She shook her head. “No. I can do this.”

  Taking a deep breath she reached into her purse and fished out the keys.

  “Let me,” he said, holding a hand out in front of her. “I can open the door for you, Deena. That’s all I want to do.”

  With another glance at the door she dropped the keys into his hand and took a step back.

  Max unlocked the door, stepped inside before her and looked around. He assumed the place had been a mess, but someone had cleaned it up. Probably her sisters. Turning back to face her he held out a hand.

  She looked down at it, then up at him. He could see her struggling with the pain of entering this apartment again and the pain he’d caused her. He hated that look in her eyes. Dropping his hand, he simply stepped to the side and waited for her to enter.

  Deena took slow steps, inhaling and exhaling as she did. One step at a time, she kept telling herself. She just needed to put one foot in front of the other and she would be inside her apartment. Kevin Langley, however, would not be. It was harder than she’d thought it would be, coming home. Coupled with the turmoil of emotions raging through her about Max she felt like a nervous wreck. But she vowed she wouldn’t act like one.

  Dropping her purse on the small table near the door she took another deep breath then looked at him. “I’m fine. You can go now.”

  He didn’t believe her. She could see the hesitation in his eyes. But he only nodded and moved toward the door. She kept her back to him, couldn’t afford to look at him again. If she did she would break down, she could feel it. He was breaking her heart and that pain surpassed the bruised ribs, rug burns and concussion.

  “I want you to know that I love you, Deena. I’ve never loved another woman in this world the way I love you. You were the first to break through the barriers I’d so foolishly created. Your smile and lust for life breathed something new inside of me.”

  Tears burned her eyes, pushed past her closed lids to trail hot paths down her face.

  “I know that ‘sorry’ isn’t enough for what I’ve done. And I know you expect me to simply walk away. But I’m telling you right now that I won’t. I love you too much to let you go.”

  “Max, please,” she whispered.

  “No. I won’t bother you right now. But I won’t stop loving you either.”

  She sobbed, caught herself and tried to breathe through the waves of pain, frustration, irritation. It was too much. She just couldn’t handle any more.

  “When you lay down to sleep tonight and the next night, know that I love you and that it was fate that brought us together on that island. It took me a while to realize it, but that means something. It means something very special. And I’m not willing to let that go.”

  The next sound Deena heard was the soft click of the door closing behind him. Sinking to her knees, she sat there in the foyer of her apartment, arms wrapped around herself, and cried.

  Chapter 17

  Monica had warned her it was time for her to grow up. Deena reluctantly agreed. Her life was currently a mess, and it was mostly her fault.

  She’d met Max and jumped into a relationship with him, a relationship he apparently didn’t want. Then she’d turned right around and met Kevin, giving him the impression she wanted something more with him when she really didn’t. That had almost ended deadly, or at the very least brutally. It seemed the impulsive nature her family had been complaining about all her life had finally bitten her in the butt.

  And admitting it wasn’t the easiest thing in the world for her to do. So she’d spent the next week in her apartment, throwing herself into her next writing project and trying like hell to block everything and everyone else in the world out. That wasn’t easy. Her mother and her sisters were daily visitors and she knew she’d never be able to stop that. Actually, it wasn’t that bad, they kept her fed and even made her laugh a time or two. All except for Monica, who was still her very stern and brutally honest self. In Monica’s opinion she was still acting immature, but then Monica was always going to have a complaint. That was just the way she was.