“It was a job. It’s what we do.”

  “You’d never done it. And for a moment, I saw you freeze up. You weren’t going to be able to. I saw it on your face. In your eyes. But he started talking about Gypsi, and something came over you. I’d never seen you like that before. The more he talked about her, the more insane you got. I know you better than anyone else. And you wouldn’t have done that for someone you didn’t love. Fuck, I’m not sure you could have done that for me.”

  I stood there, staring at him. What was he fucking saying? That I loved her? That was shit. I was in love with her fucking pussy. That was for damn sure.

  “I care about her, but I am no longer allowed to fuck her.”

  Sax shrugged. “Whatever the case may be, you need to look at how you feel about her and accept it.”

  “I don’t love her, if that is what you’re saying. She’s a friend. I like to fuck her. That is it. There’s no future in this. She’s not special to me. She’s gonna be my fucking stepsister. End of story. We will end this, and I’ll go fuck someone else.” Just saying it made me sick to my stomach. That was a warning I should have paid attention to before now. I didn’t want anyone else’s pussy, and that was not normal. Maybe Gypsi had gotten in my head and messed with it.

  Sax walked over to the weight bench. “That’s all I’m going to say about it.”

  “Good.”

  Twenty-Eight

  Gypsi

  “I don’t love her, if that is what you’re saying. She’s a friend. I like to fuck her. That is it. There’s no future in this. She’s not special to me. She’s gonna be my fucking stepsister. End of story. We will end this, and I’ll go fuck someone else.”

  Those words kept replaying in my head as I sat in the bedroom that was now mine. I’d been told to decorate it however I wanted. There were clothes in my closet with ridiculous price tags. Cocktail dresses and formals. More things than any one person needed. Mom had insisted Garrett wanted me at all the events they went to and I had to dress the part.

  All I wanted to do was go get our camper and leave this town. My heart felt like it was shattering over and over again. I’d been so stupid. Knowing that what I’d heard was exactly what he had said in the beginning. Hearing it had hurt so bad because it was then I realized I loved him. I’d let this go too far. He had charmed his way into my heart, and I had never had this kind of pain before.

  My phone dinged, and I glanced down to see a text from Mom.

  We are going out. Ms. Jimmie has set up a delicious taco bar in the kitchen. Go eat something. Love you!

  I had no appetite. I set my phone down on the bed and pulled my knees up to my chest. This was what I’d asked for when I decided friends with benefits was something I could do. Trev hadn’t even texted me today. I’d left his room after waking up and having sex with him. I’d let myself believe that I was special to him. That he had meant all those things he said to me. He had just been sex talking. I was too naive to know the difference.

  There was a knock on my door before it opened, and Trev walked in. He was sweaty from his workout, wearing a sleeveless shirt and athletic shorts. That smile of his made my heart squeeze. He wasn’t mine. He never had been.

  He leaned against the doorframe. “We got a trip to plan,” he said.

  “A trip?”

  “Dad has given me the order to take you horse shopping.”

  I stared at him, confused. What was horse shopping?

  “You, me, and a road trip. I say we stretch it out. You need to be picky.” He winked at me, shoving off from the doorframe and walking over toward me.

  I tensed. I had to end this. I held up my hand to stop him. Watching the confused frown mess up that sexy smile made me feel guilty. I liked seeing him smile. I liked hearing him laugh.

  “What’s wrong, Lollipop?”

  I couldn’t lie to him. Hurting him, even though I wasn’t sure I had that power, I couldn’t do it. “We have to stop.”

  “Why? Because our parents came home? We’ll be careful.”

  I shook my head. “No. That’s not it.”

  He took another step toward me. “Then, what is it? I thought we talked about this going on for a long time.”

  We had. Then, I’d gotten feelings.

  He reached out and touched my waist.

  I backed away from him. “No.”

  “I get it. They’re home. It feels real now. But steps with benefits is something we are inventing. It’ll make us famous,” he said, tilting his head with that wicked grin.

  “Trev, it’s … we need to … I don’t think I can—” I stopped and covered my face with my hands.

  This was too hard. Was this what true devastation felt like?

  “Lollipop, I’m real close to putting you over my knee and spanking your ass.” He smirked. “You’d fucking love that.”

  Yes, I would, and the fact that it wasn’t going to happen made me literally ache.

  “I’m in love with you,” I blurted out.

  His face paled, and he stepped back. He looked horrified. Watching him stare at me as if he might be sick was painful. Part of me wished I could take it back.

  “You can’t. I mean, we didn’t agree on that.”

  I laughed. It sounded harsh. Bitter. “As if I can control that. I’m sorry that my heart had other ideas.”

  He ran a hand over his face. “We haven’t known each other that long. You can’t love me. That’s not normal. Fuck, Gypsi,” he muttered. Not Lollipop. It was like he’d taken a knife and shoved it into my chest. “This messes it up. Doesn’t it?” His eyes searched my face for something I couldn’t give him. A way to work around this.

  “Yeah, Trev, it does. I can’t keep doing this with you and knowing I’m not special to you.”

  He shook his head. “That’s not true—”

  “I heard you. Just please don’t. Don’t lie to me. I can’t take that.”

  I watched him try and figure out what I’d heard, but it didn’t take him long.

  Realization dawned on him, and he winced. “Goddammit.”

  “Let’s just get some distance. Some time. Then, maybe we can do the friends-stepsiblings thing. I just need to work through this.”

  Trev stood there, staring at me like he wanted to get the hell away from me. Me and my honesty. If only I were better at lying. Baring my soul wasn’t always easy.

  When he turned and walked out of the room, not looking back even once, I knew that this was completely one-sided. Part of me had hoped he’d admit to lying to Saxon and saying he felt something for me too. But he hadn’t. I shouldn’t have expected more.

  I lay down on the bed, curled myself into a ball, and let the tears come.

  One Day Since Trev Walked Out of My Room

  “Why are you showing me the third floor?” I asked Mom when the elevator I hadn’t even known was in this house stopped at three instead of four.

  The entire fourth floor was the master suite. I’d thought we were going up there so Mom could show me after she gushed about it over breakfast.

  Mom gave me her beaming grin and waved her hands out as she spun in a circle. “Because I am supposed to redecorate this entire floor and I want your help.”

  I glanced around. It was as elegant as the rest of the house. “What needs redecorating?”

  “I know it looks fabulous already, but Garrett wants things changed. No one uses these rooms anymore. He wants Cree to have a room up here and to add a master suite if Blaise and Madeline ever want to stay here. He had a former stepdaughter who stayed here, even after he divorced her mom—Gina, I believe her name was. Anyway, she is no longer in the family.” Mom lowered her voice as if someone could hear her. “She handed Madeline over to men who abducted her on purpose. To get rid of her.”

  “Oh my God.” I was whispering now, I realized.

  Mom nodded. “Right? But come to find out, it was actually Madeline’s real father. And the people who took her weren’t bad people. But Blaise couldn’t forgive Gina and sent her away.”

  “It’s weird that she stayed here after her mom divorced Garrett,” I pointed out. That seemed creepy.

  “Well, there’s a reason. The other person who had a room up here was a girl named Angel. She was very close to Blaise, growing up, and then she was in a car accident. It killed her parents and left her with permanent brain damage. Her parents were very close friends of Garrett’s, so he took her in. Gina helped take care of Angel.”

  That was less creepy. I relaxed somewhat. “What happened to Angel?”

  Mom cut her eyes at me as I followed her into the first room. “Well, Angel loved Blaise before the head injury. She remained attached to him, and he seemed to be the only person who could calm her. In her head, he was hers. Then, Madeline came along, and they had issues, but with Angel being here, it gave them some space.

  “When Cree was an infant, he was in the nursery Garrett has for him on the second floor. Angel took him from the crib and brought him up here. Thanks to the security cameras, Ms. Jimmie was alerted right away, and she came to get Cree. Blaise was in the house at the time, and he heard the alarm in the nursery, but he arrived after Ms. Jimmie. Ms. Jimmie had Cree back safely in her arms and was scolding Angel.

  “Blaise came in the room and took Cree from Ms. Jimmie. Angel then began screaming and clawing at Blaise. Anyway, after that, Garrett had her moved to live with an older couple he trusts, who wanted to take her in. She’s better there. Being near Blaise, seeing his wife and child was making her get more hysterical.”

  I stood there, staring at Mom as she walked around the room, looking at things. That was so sad. All of it.

  “Wow, that’s dark,” I replied.

  Mom looked at me and shrugged. “I guess every family has their dark stories.”

  This was my moment. She’d not brought up who Garrett was to me yet. I’d thought this going to the master suite idea was her way of getting me away to talk to me. But here we were, on the third floor, talking about redecorating.

  “Especially in a Mafia family,” I replied.

  Mom stilled with the vase she’d picked up in her hand. Her head turned to me, and I saw the apology in her expression before she even spoke.

  “You know,” she whispered.

  “Yes, and I’ve been wondering when you were going to tell me. Seeing as Garrett being a Mafia boss affects my life too. Apparently, it’s not safe for me to live on my own or to have a normal job. Kye taking us shopping was for security, Mom. He wasn’t just the driver. I was aware that he was following us as we shopped. Driver’s don’t do that.”

  Mom set the vase down and sat on the edge of the bed. “I’m sorry, Gypsi. I didn’t know how to tell you. I was going to, obviously, but, well, it was a lot for me to process. I like crazy adventures; you don’t. I worried you wouldn’t be able to accept it since you’re not the one in love here.”

  I wanted to laugh. She had no idea. My chest ached, just hearing the word love.

  “So, it’s true. I have to live here. I can’t go back to the camper?”

  She gave me a tight smile. “Honey, the camper has been sold. All our things from it are in boxes. I was going to have your things brought up to your room as soon as I got the nerve to explain all this to you.”

  Sold. The camper we’d lived in most of my life had been sold. My eyes stung, and I had to turn away from her for a moment. I needed to digest this. Sure, I had known she no longer needed the camper, but it was all I’d known.

  “Oh, Gypsi,” she said, getting up and walking over to me.

  She pulled me into her arms, and I went. I needed that more than she knew. Not just because of our camper or because our life was completely changing. I needed it because my heart was broken and no one knew. I couldn’t tell anyone. I had no one to share it with. My mom had been my best friend my entire life. I’d told her everything.

  But this I couldn’t tell her. That made the hurt slice even deeper. I was alone. I knew she’d be there. She was my mom, but she wasn’t all mine anymore. She was going to be someone’s wife.

  “I know this is a lot for you. The change. The lifestyle. I want you to enjoy this. As happy as Garrett makes me, I can’t do this if you’re miserable. You’re my number one. You always have been.”

  A tear ran down my cheek, and I bit my lip hard, trying to stop any more from falling. I was grown. Mom had given up everything to be the best mom a girl could ask for. But she was done raising me. I wasn’t going to stand here and ruin this for her by falling apart because my heart was broken over a guy. One who had made it very clear that what he wanted from me was sex and friendship. It might have been slightly easier to handle if I hadn’t heard him say I wasn’t special to him. Couldn’t a friend be special? Was it because I was a freak? Did the kinks that had made Tyde so angry with me make it impossible for Trev to think of me as anything but a slut?

  Mom pulled back and looked at me. “Listen, I will get Garrett to buy the camper back. We can park it somewhere on the ranch.”

  “Mom, no. That’s silly. It’s not even that. Not really. I just need time to adjust to all this.”

  She cupped the side of my face. “I love you, Gypsi Lu. You know that, right?”

  I nodded. “I love you too, Mom.”

  She pulled me in tightly for another hug. “Oh, and one more thing. It’s not a big deal, but I don’t want you to be blindsided by it. Do you remember who Liam Walsh is?”

  I nodded, stiffening. Was this about Tyde? My stomach knotted.

  “Well, he’s Madeline’s father. The MC are the guys who took Madeline that time. She had never met her dad. They are close now, and all is well. Garrett knows about Micah. I don’t want secrets between us. He also knows about Tyde, and we don’t have to worry about him anymore. Liam has disassociated from him. He is no longer in the MC. Garrett said he won’t ever come here.”

  I stared at her, wondering if there was any more news that was going to shock me. Trev had already promised that Tyde was gone. But the Liam thing—I hadn’t seen that coming.

  “Tyde got on this property. They caught him. What did they do to make him stop stalking me?” I asked her.

  She frowned at me. “I’m not happy about you not telling me about the stalking. I could have protected you. That little shit was screwing with the wrong woman’s daughter.”

  “Mom, he is a psycho. What were you going to do? Hit him with a frying pan?”

  She shrugged. “Or a baseball bat.”

  “I’m sure that would have sent him running.”

  She smirked at me, and then a laugh bubbled out of her. “Well, he’s gone now.”

  “But how? Do you know what they did to him?”

  She looked down and then lifted her eyes back to me slowly. “In this family, there are some things you don’t want answers to.”

  “They wouldn’t have killed him, right?” I asked, not sure again how I felt about that.

  “Who knows what they chose to do?” She turned back to the room and looked around. “Now, what do you think about bold colors? Maybe an emerald green.”

  This was an answer I wouldn’t be getting. Maybe she was right. Maybe I didn’t want to know.

  Twenty-Nine

  Gypsi

  Three Days Since Trev Walked Out of My Room

  Mom and Garrett were both at the dining room table when I came down for breakfast. It had just been Mom the past couple of mornings. Trev was MIA. I hadn’t seen him in three days. I’d run him off from his home with three dreaded words—I love you.

  “Good morning!” Mom said brightly as she put her cup of coffee down. “Did you sleep well?”

  “Yes,” I lied.

  I had tossed and turned most of the night. When I had slept, I dreamed of Trev, and I would wake up sad, alone, and broken.

  “Ms. Jimmie made a lovely spread today,” Mom said, waving her hand at the food that went down the center of the table. It was all placed attractively on fancy silver serving trays.

  I picked up a plate and began to put some fruit on it, then moved to get what looked like tiny pancake towers, layered with whipped cream and strawberries, before taking a seat.

  “Your mom tells me you would like to work,” Garrett said.

  I looked up at him as he set the Wall Street Journal that had been in his hands down on the table beside him.

  “Yes, sir. I don’t think I can just do nothing. I like working, and I want to make my own money,” I explained.

  He nodded. “I respect that. She also mentioned you enjoy photography.”

  “Yes.”

  “The ranch—the horse racing part of it at least—has its own social media. Madeline convinced me it was needed once she started working here. She does what she can with taking photos and keeping it updated. The horses, the races, that sort of thing. It helps bring more potential customers to us. However, Madeline will tell you herself that photography isn’t her strong suit. She also struggles with balancing that with all the other jobs she has in the office and having time with Cree. If you would be willing to take over the social media part of the stables, go to the races, take photos of the day-to-day operations at the stables and the work put in with the horses, I will supply you with the equipment you would need. It would be salary based since hours could be heavier on some weeks and lighter on others. One hundred twenty-five thousand a year. With bonuses.”

  I sat there, silent, staring at him. He was offering me a job I would have never dreamed of getting without a college degree. There was no way I could accept that salary. It was entirely too much when I was already living in his home and eating his food. The clothes in my closet he’d purchased for me were more than I could ever repay him.

  “If you want to attend college, I can arrange for you to do so in the fall. It would be safest for you to attend the private college a little over an hour from here. You can do many classes online, and the days you need to be on campus, I can send one of my men with you.”