“And?”

  “She smelled really good?”

  “Yes, this seems like solid reasoning to make big decisions. Topless woman who smells good,” she said.

  “Aren’t you glad you decided to let me be a role model for your kid?”

  “Every day.”

  “Anyway, I realized she was naked and I was taking advantage, which led to me thinking maybe I wasn’t making the best decisions so I stopped kissing her. And she was like, hey, let’s not stop. And I was like, hey, we have to.”

  “That sounds very responsible of you. When you discussed it afterward, what did she say?” Robin asked.

  “I’m sorry, you think we discussed it afterward? Have you met me?” My voice went a little high-pitched, but in my defense, I was pretty incredulous.

  “Fair point. I know you didn’t discuss it. It’s kind of amazing that you called me to talk about it.”

  “I know. Look at me growing.”

  “I’m very proud,” she said.

  “We were alone for like two minutes the next day and she called me out on it.”

  “What did you say?”

  “That I was an emotional coward and she admitted she was too and then someone else came in the room and I ran away.” It seemed perfectly reasonable at the time.

  “Awesome. Great decision-making. So what are you going to do?”

  “I don’t know. That’s why I called you. Tell me what to do,” I said.

  “What do you want?”

  I thought it was a difficult question, but apparently, I knew the answer immediately. “I want her, but I don’t trust her.”

  “Yeah, that’s kind of necessary.”

  “Only if we want a healthy relationship.”

  “And, presumably, you do,” she said.

  “Yeah, ideally.”

  “I’m not sure I can help you, pal. Trust is built over time. But you have to start the process at some point.”

  “Wow, yeah. Super unhelpful.”

  Chapter Twenty-six

  When I went back out to the common room, everyone had dispersed. Jalen was still at her spot at the table. I’d yet to see her go farther than three feet from her seat, which was making me worry about her. Duarte was sitting with her and typing into his own set of laptops. Laurel was stretched out on the couch again. She had a cup of coffee balanced on her chest. I poured my own coffee and dropped into the wingback across from her.

  “Where did everyone go?” I asked.

  “Michelson’s in one of the bedrooms calling the DEA office in Sac.” She nodded at the closed bedroom door. Reyes was in the other bedroom having a phone conversation, if the pieces I could hear were any indication. “If they don’t have an investigation open, he wants to bring them in. If they do have an investigation, he wants all their info.”

  “Nice. What are the chances they have an investigation open?”

  She shrugged. “No clue. They clearly haven’t come across any hints of Brewer because they would have contacted Michelson.”

  “They would?”

  “You know law enforcement agencies talk to each other, right?”

  “I guess. They never seem all that competent, honestly.”

  “Well, let’s hope they are. Michelson’s giving them Millard, assuming he’s actually manufacturing or distributing drugs.” She sat up a little so she could sip her coffee.

  “What’s that mean for us?”

  “If we’re lucky, they will start surveillance on him immediately. If we’re really lucky, Brewer is hiding out at his off-grid house.”

  “I don’t see why they don’t just go knock on Millard’s door and check for Henry? He’s a fugitive,” I said.

  “Because it will tip Millard and Brewer off that we’ve connected them.”

  That was pretty logical. “Oh. Okay.”

  “Malone, Boyd, and Orr are trading off watching the Franks. Michelson will have a couple of agents join them as soon as Jalen finishes background checks.”

  “Why not have Duarte and Reyes help out?” I nodded at Duarte at the table.

  “We apparently still need babysitters.”

  “I feel like we don’t need babysitters.” There was no way to say that without sounding petulant.

  “Agreed. The point was hiding. Brewer doesn’t know where we are.”

  “Boom. Hidden.” I spread my arms to indicate the condo.

  “Exactly.”

  “So they’re off saving the world or whatever and we have to sit around here and twiddle our thumbs?” I asked.

  “Yep. It’s a bum deal.”

  “The bummest of deals.”

  “Is bummest a word?” she asked.

  “All words have to be created before they become words.”

  “So it’s not a word yet?”

  “No, it’s a word now. But it wasn’t thirty seconds ago before I created it. You get it.”

  She looked at me like she absolutely did not get it. “Okay.”

  I sipped my coffee and felt like there was some connection between the creation of words and the creation of trust, but I couldn’t quite figure it out. Laurel finished her coffee and set the mug on the coffee table. Robin said I had to start the process in order to build trust, but Robin didn’t know I already trusted Laurel. There were some massive gaps, mercurial questions, but each day sitting in this stuffy condo seemed to fill in the edges just a little. Before we’d come to the safe house, I was afraid my attraction to her would cloud the issue, but it seemed to give my vision perfect clarity. It didn’t matter that she was hot or smart or confident. It mattered that sitting next to her in silence healed parts of me. Even the parts she had broken.

  “Hey, Laurel?”

  She looked over at me. “Yeah?”

  “I think I’m ready to have that conversation.”

  She sat upright instantly. “Are you sure?”

  “Yes.”

  We glanced over. Duarte and Jalen had their heads buried. “Now?” she asked.

  “Yes.” I stood. Laurel followed me to my room. I closed the door. She stared at me.

  “So what do you want to talk about?” She seemed nervous as fuck.

  “Oh, I’d rather not talk.” I stripped off my T-shirt and tossed it.

  “Yeah, okay.”

  We both took a step forward and then we were kissing. She tried to pull her shirt off. I tried to help unbutton it. Neither of us were entirely successful. We couldn’t stop kissing long enough. She tasted bitter like coffee, pure like her. She kissed down my neck, leaving a cool, damp trail. Her hands were at my waistband, wrestling with the button on my shorts. By the time we fell onto the bed, we’d managed to almost entirely strip. I was still tangled in my boxers and she had one sock on. Just one.

  “Who wears socks in summer?” I asked as I tried to remove the sock with my big toe.

  “My feet get cold.” She pulled it off and tossed it.

  “Weirdo.” I rolled on top of her and slid my thigh between hers.

  She gripped my hips and pulled me tighter against her. Her fingers twisted in the elastic of my underwear and pushed them down. I kicked them off. Her hands went to my ass, grabbing, kneading, pulling me tight against her. She groaned and looked down the joined length of our bodies. And then she started to smile, to laugh.

  “I fucking missed you.”

  “Shut up.” I kissed her and marveled at the feeling of her lips pressed against mine. The slope and arc of our lips slid together and apart in perfect, grasping unity. We kissed and kissed and kissed. It was coming home and relief and yet seemed like it always existed. No matter where we were in time, this perfect kiss was happening.

  Her hands moved up, grasping my hips, my ribs. She traced the edges of my collarbones with her fingertips. She dug into the hint of muscle over my shoulders. I moved against her, trying to climb inside her skin. She slid her fingers around my wrist and pushed my hand between us. I slid into her. She arched against me. She gripped the back of my arm, holding me in place. I started to move. Slowly at first. She pulled my head down to kiss me again. She pressed her tongue inside my mouth, pulled it back. Her fingertips skated over the back of my head. She tugged my hair, held me closer. She traced the edge of my jaw, cupped my chin to hold me still. Her lips moved against mine and away. When I chased her, she held firm, then leaned up to kiss me again.

  It was distracting as all hell. Not quite distracting enough to break my slow rhythm though. Her breath caught when I sped up. I braced my arm against the bed to hold myself steady. I started to fuck her hard, fast. She moaned and pulled my head to her uninjured shoulder. I sucked and bit. Her moans got louder and I pressed my free hand over her mouth. The vibrations cut through me and I nearly came just from listening to her. I pumped in and out of her. She wrapped her foot around my leg and arched hard off the bed. When she came, she went stiff. The sudden shift forced me to drop against her. She wrapped her arms tight around me. Her hands still grasping, tracing, feeling every inch of my skin.

  “Told you I missed you,” she said.

  “Maybe you should miss me again in a minute.” I grinned against her skin.

  “You are the worst.” She smiled. “I love you. You need to know that.”

  I stopped grinning like an idiot. “I know.”

  “Good.” She kissed me sweetly, then thrust her hip up and flipped me onto my back.

  “Show-off.”

  “Yeah.” She dipped down for another sweet kiss. Her hands slid into mine and pinned them to the bed. The kiss shifted to decidedly not sweet. She bit my lip, then sucked it.

  I squeezed her hands and tried to touch her, but she held firm. She stopped kissing me long enough to slide down my body. She kissed across my chest, sucking each nipple for not nearly long enough. I whimpered when she moved lower. She nipped at my ribs, dipped her tongue into my belly button, spent an obscene amount of time in the hollow of my hip before finally lowering her mouth. She started by licking the length of me. Her hair fell forward and tickled my thighs. She swirled her tongue over and around, never slowing, never touching my clit.

  “Please.” The word came out a choked cry. It had been so long since I last came. I simply hadn’t cared to bother. Not if it wasn’t going to be her. And suddenly we were here. She splayed me open, rendered my flesh valuable again.

  She sucked my clit into her mouth. Her tongue built a rhythm designed to make me forget my own name. She was perfectly capable of making me wait. She knew exactly how to bleed me dry of everything except the desire for her. And yet, she didn’t. Like she knew the depth of my need, knew making me want more was useless. I was already wanting.

  I came hard and long. I was aware only of her and the pounding of my heart. I gasped for air as she crawled back up my body. She stopped when we were face-to-face. I reached up and pushed her hair back out of her face.

  “I love you too.”

  “I thought you might.” She smiled slowly and kissed me.

  ✥ ✥ ✥

  It was dark, but barely when someone knocked on Laurel’s door. “It’s me,” Reyes called.

  Laurel looked at me in panic. I was certain my expression was about the same. I started to get out of bed, but I was hecka naked, the bathroom door was eight feet away, and Reyes was already opening the door. I dove back under the covers. Laurel pulled the blanket up.

  “Jeez, Lucas. You’re supposed to wait for acknowledgement after you knock.”

  “Oh, sorry.” His voice hesitated. “I, uh, I always come in like that with you. I didn’t realize it bothered you.”

  “It’s fine. I’m just giving you shit.”

  “Cool. I just wanted to update you. We found a cabin in—why are you in bed? It’s like eight thirty.”

  She tugged the blanket a little. I focused on taking shallow, quiet breaths. “I was taking a nap. We’ve been pulling weird hours.”

  “You’re naked. Oh, fuck.” He closed the door. “Is Cash under there?” he whispered.

  “No.” Laurel had entirely lost her ability to lie.

  “Yeah.” I sat up. Laurel looked at me in horror. “It’s fucking hot. I couldn’t breathe.”

  “Shit.” Reyes turned toward the door. “I’m going to go. I’ll check back later.”

  “Dude, you’re fine. We just need clothes,” Laurel said.

  I leaned over and whispered, “My clothes are all next door in my room.”

  “Right.” Laurel looked over the edge of the bed and checked the floor, but I was quite certain we had removed all our clothes twenty-five feet and a wall away. “Give us five minutes, okay?”

  “Yeah. Sure. Five minutes.” He nearly tripped trying to get out and shut the door behind himself.

  “I think he took that well,” Laurel said.

  “Oh, yeah. The two of you were chill as fuck.” I kissed her and climbed out of bed.

  “I don’t think I appreciate your tone.” She also climbed out of bed. “Are all my clothes in your room too?” She spun in a circle to check the floor again.

  “Unless I dozed off and you went to grab your clothes and bring them over here, yeah, they’re where you left them.” I walked through the bathroom to my room. I came across her shirt first and tossed it on the bed. She found my shorts and one of her socks. Her underwear and shorts were under the sheets we’d kicked onto the floor. My T-shirt was hanging off the edge of the dresser. My boxer briefs were under one of the pillows.

  There was a knock next door. We gave up on the final sock and threw on our clothes. After a respectable ninety seconds, Reyes let himself into Laurel’s room and loudly closed the door.

  “Kallen? Braddock?”

  “We’re coming. Just a sec.” Laurel rushed to button her shirt.

  We filed back to her room and found Reyes leaning against the dresser, staring intently at the floor.

  “You doing okay there, buddy?” I asked.

  “I’m super.” He kept his eyes on his feet.

  “We’re dressed now. You can look,” Laurel said.

  “Yeah, sure. I know that.” He looked up, but still refused eye contact.

  Laurel stepped into his line of vision. “Stop being weird.”

  He grinned. “I’m sorry. I just didn’t see that coming. And I’ve never seen you in bed with someone.”

  “Well, yeah. If you had, that would be creepy.”

  “Yes. Okay. Good point.”

  “What did you come in to tell me before?” Laurel asked.

  “Oh, that. Jalen found a cabin,” Reyes said.

  I sat on the edge of the bed. “Can we narrow that down? There are a lot of cabins in, you know, the world.” Laurel sat next to me. I could feel the heat radiating off her.

  “Listen, I’m so cool with this.” Reyes pointed back and forth between me and Laurel. “Really. Just super cool.” Laurel and I looked at each other. I raised an eyebrow and she smirked. He did not seem super cool. “But also this is strange for me. So if you could just kind of ease me in, that would be great.”

  “Which part is throwing you off?” I asked.

  “The whole thing. I’ve never seen Kallen in a serious relationship.”

  I turned back to Laurel. “Never?” She shrugged.

  “And, yes, the former criminal thing is throwing me off. But I think it’s more than that. I spent so much time denying that you two were anything other than detective and CI and now you’re actually in a relationship, but you’re not detective and CI anymore. It’s just weird for me, okay?”

  “Shit,” Laurel said.

  “What?” he asked.

  “I didn’t think about that. You know when Gibson was making his allegations, we weren’t actually in a relationship, right?”

  “You weren’t?” He was surprised and maybe a little relieved.

  “No. I lied to you and I feel like a dick, but I wouldn’t have let you lie for me.”

  He nodded. “Good. That’s good.”

  “How long has he known about this?” I asked.

  “Since he read Brewer’s stalking notes,” Laurel said.

  “Fuck. Okay, so you two have some shit to work out?”

  They both shook their heads, but then Laurel shrugged and started nodding. He joined her a second later. “I guess,” she said.

  “All right. Let’s do this. Reyes, you’ve got ten minutes and then we want to know about this mystery cabin,” I said.

  “I really don’t have questions. I just want her to be happy. You make her happy. Actually, I don’t know if you do, but I know not being with you makes her miserable.”

  “Aww, I think he loves you.” I nudged Laurel with my shoulder.

  “Yeah, whatever.” Laurel rolled her eyes. So Reyes rolled his.

  “Okay. Mystery cabin. Spill.”

  “The Franks have a family cabin. It’s in their maternal grandfather’s name, which is why it took so long for Jalen to find. It’s in the middle of fucking nowhere.”

  “You think Brewer is hiding out there?” Laurel asked.

  “It’s a possibility, yeah. We’re pretty sure he’s not staying with Gavin or Travis. We tailed them all day and saw no indication that he was there.”

  “What about Curtis?” I asked.

  “The DEA had a team in place by noon. They’re pretty sure no one is home.”

  “Isn’t he in the middle of nowhere too? Can they even get close enough to see if he’s there?” I asked.

  “He’s far from county maintained roads, but his house is right on the river. From there, they have a straight sightline into his house. Everything is battened down and locked up. Patio furniture, solar panels. Even his little fishing boat has been pulled up.”

  “So we’re thinking he’s with Brewer in this cabin?” Laurel asked.

  “Yep. That’s the hope at least.”

  “Can we get a warrant to go into the cabin?”

  Reyes shook his head. “Magistrate thinks our case is flimsy. He’s an asshat who always errs on the side of privacy and liberty and shit.”

  “Is this that dickwad we had during the Roth case a couple of years ago?”

  “Yes.” Reyes sounded stoked that she remembered.

  “Ugh. He was the worst.”

  “Anyway, DEA is liaising with Malone. It sounds like they’re going to shift surveillance from the Millard house to the Frank family cabin tomorrow.”