He was vaguely aware of Jordan pulling his cock free. Gideon’s vision was blurry and he was achy in spots from the physical fighting of earlier, but he honestly didn’t think he’d ever been happier in his entire life than he was right then.

  Chapter Eleven

  He was going to have to tell them. Stefan pried open his eyes. They were cuddled so perfectly together, the three of them, but Stefan’s conscience was kicking him in the gut. He sat up and both Gideon and Jordan grumbled.

  The two men were battered, bruised—though not as badly as if they’d been alive. Still, they’d got those marks trying to protect him. He touched the worst one on Jordan’s cheek.

  Jordan opened one eye. “Fuckin’ Conner,” he groaned.

  Stefan cocked his head. “Conner?”

  Jordan moaned and rolled onto his back. “Yup. Guy can throw a punch.”

  “’Specially when we aren’t trying to duck ’em,” Gideon said from Stefan’s other side.

  Stefan frowned back and forth at them. “What are you talking about? When did Conner do this, because I saw Jordan right before I went—” Well, maybe bringing up the whole bar thing wasn’t a good idea.

  “Before you went looking to get some ass,” Gideon finished bluntly. “If we hadn’t been such self-centered dicks none of that would have happened. I’m sorry, Stefan. I didn’t think you’d believe I’d just blown you off.”

  “Same here.” Jordan sat up and ran a finger over Stefan’s bottom lip. “I mean, you’re the guy I want to take my cherry, baby. That ought to tell you something.”

  It ought to, but Stefan was kind of in a state of disbelief.

  “I think you shocked him into silence.” Gideon sat up and began kissing the back of Stefan’s neck. “Not even a squeak out of him. I’m glad you’ve decided to give butt sex a chance from the other end of things before saying it isn’t for you.”

  “I—” Stefan squeezed his eyes shut. The vision of him pushing his cock into Jordan’s hole made him whimper. He had to open his eyes up and grab the base of his cock. A hard grip kept him from coming. “I haven’t ever done that.”

  “Oh, two virgins,” Gideon murmured. “That means I’ll get to direct.”

  “He does love to watch,” Jordan added.

  “Love to do, too,” Gideon said.

  “I’ve been fucked before,” Stefan reminded them, fearing they’d forgotten and would think him a complete virgin. Both men turned expectant looks on him, with Gideon moving around to be able to see his face. “It hurt. Both times.”

  “Twice only?” Gideon rasped. “How long ago?”

  “A long time ago,” Stefan whispered. “Right before he killed me.” Stefan hung his head, ashamed of his past. His life.

  “Wait,” Jordan snapped. “You’re saying the guy who you had sex with…killed you?”

  Stefan nodded without raising his head all the way up. “Yeah. I was stupid. I just wanted someone to want me. It was just a game to him, then he didn’t want anyone to find out he’d ever played it.”

  “What the fuck?” Gideon said, not quite yelling but with enough anger that it gave Stefan goosebumps. “He killed you to keep it a secret? Did he rape you?”

  Stefan looked up then, just for a second. “No, no, I wanted him to…to want me. I just didn’t understand what that meant.”

  Gideon narrowed his eyes and Stefan averted his gaze again.

  “And how long have you been a spirit?” Jordan asked.

  “I’m not sure exactly. Twelve years, ish, like I said before.”

  “Were you raised in some kind of a religious compound where you didn’t know about sex or—”

  “I was mentally retarded,” Stefan interrupted, not wanting to make them keep coming up with more and more ridiculous postulations.

  The silence in the room was telling. Stefan slid out from between the two men. “My brain, something happened when I was being born. It was a physical thing, though, see? And when I died, the physical died too. All that was left was my spirit, what made me, me. But I get that I’m still—”

  He stopped. He was still what? Stefan scowled. He wasn’t still limited by the physical. What he was limited by was his own memories and shame. Conner was right, of course. Stefan hadn’t had any choice in how he’d been born, but he couldn’t stop feeling like a complete fool for letting Johnny touch him.

  “I was so pathetically desperate,” he whispered. That was what he couldn’t forgive himself for.

  “Everyone wants to be loved.” Jordan came over and Gideon did, too. “We want to be loved, and we want to love and feel good. I don’t care how you were in your lifetime, Stefan. I like the man you are now.”

  “Did you think that would make us not want you?” Gideon asked.

  Stefan shrugged.

  Gideon caressed Stefan’s cheek. “I think you’re an amazing man. I want to kill the guy who hurt you.”

  Stefan flicked a hand. “Oh he’s dead. Someone killed him in prison, after he was convicted of killing me.” Stefan finally held his head up then, but he looked up at the ceiling, unable to meet his lovers’ eyes. “I was afraid he’d end up being a spirit, and finding me, but Conner… Conner said he took care of that. I don’t know how, and I don’t want to. Conner’s just Conner. He wouldn’t let me get hurt again.”

  “Except we hurt you,” Jordan muttered. “I was embarrassed and scared because…”

  Stefan had to look at him, just had to.

  Jordan smiled shyly. “I didn’t think Gid wanted me to love him. We acted like friends, never touched each other until after, you know, we were killed. I—” He glanced at Gideon and gulped before going on. “Gideon’s the only man, other than you, that I’d let fuck me. I’ve thought about it, a lot.”

  Gideon burned with a wantonness that was unmistakable. He didn’t move, though, just watched Jordan hungrily.

  “I thought he’d think less of me,” Jordan continued. “Especially if I told him I wanted him to fuck me. I was stupid. Figured since Gideon didn’t let anyone top him, he’d think I was weak for wanting it, and even weaker for falling in love with him.” He held up a hand when Gideon opened his mouth. “I didn’t know you’d tried it several times and hated it.”

  Gideon snapped his mouth shut and nodded.

  Stefan frowned at him. Gideon didn’t like getting fucked? “Did it hurt a lot?”

  Gideon paled. “No, I just didn’t like it. It didn’t feel good, and when the guys I tried it with rubbed against my prostate, I wanted to kick them off me. It just—I wished I liked it. I do.” He arched his eyebrows. “Do you think maybe, since it was a physical thing, I might like it now?”

  Stefan felt flushed from his forehead to his toes. “Maybe?” he eked out. He thumbed in Jordan’s direction. “He can try. I’m scared I’ll screw it up and you already said you hated before so I don’t—” Oh God, he was babbling. Stefan bit his tongue too hard and yelped. “Oh thit,” he lisped, pressing his tongue against the roof of his mouth to stymie the pain.

  “Bite your tongue?” Gideon asked, looking too smug for Stefan’s liking. Stefan turned his nose up at the man. “For what it’s worth, I think you’re sexy when you start getting nervous and ramble on.”

  Stefan swallowed loudly as he fought back the urge to jump Gideon and fuck him, or be fucked. He didn’t care, either was seeming like a really good idea.

  “I’m sorry your first sexual partner was a murdering bastard,” Jordan said, “But if you’ll let us be your last two, I promise you won’t regret it, right, Gid?”

  “Right,” Gideon agreed quickly.

  Stefan checked his tongue. The sting was gone. He was still afraid to take the next step despite his rampant hormones.

  “What’s wrong?” Gideon asked.

  “Your past doesn’t matter, except that it matters to you,” Jordan added. “It made you into the man you are.”

  “But—” Stefan had to force the words out, because he was afraid he’d make a point that would result in Gideon and Jordan leaving him and going on together. He had to say it, regardless. “You love each other, and I’m just here.”

  Jordan hissed and Gideon spared him a wink. “Why would you doubt it, Jo? I followed you here. I’ve always followed you, except when you followed me.”

  “You never said,” Jordan groused.

  “Because you didn’t say, and I was too scared to do it first,” Gideon explained. “Then we died, and guess what? Life really is short, but I’m hoping the afterlife is long, so we all three have decades and decades to spend learning and loving each other.” Gideon surprised Stefan by hooking an arm around him and pulling him close. He stared down into Stefan’s eyes in a commanding way that made Stefan feel quivery inside. “As for you, we haven’t known each other long, but I can promise you this. I’ve never been so drawn to anyone before, and I know Jo hasn’t either. There was never a man we both wanted as much as, it turns out, we want each other. Until you, Stefan.”

  Gideon kissed him softly, so tenderly that Stefan’s eyes burned as emotions welled up inside him. Hope that he might really be wanted, that there might be love some day between the three of them—Stefan couldn’t refute it and didn’t want to. He wanted his happy ending, and he wanted it with these two men.

  “I won’t lie and say I’m in love with you,” Jordan said as he took Stefan from Gideon’s arms. “Easy words with little weight to them are blown away in the first little storm that comes along.” He tipped Stefan’s chin up with two fingers. “But like Gid said, I feel more for you than I ever have anyone else after such a short period of time. Even Gid. Honestly, he intimidated me.” Jordan winked at Stefan. “And he’s kinda gruff at times, but you…”

  Jordan licked his lips, then he licked Stefan’s and moaned softly. “Oh God, you’re just… Stefan, you’re more than I ever hoped for, and that you’re willing to have us both? So amazing, baby.” He licked Stefan’s mouth open and plunged his tongue inside.

  Whereas Gideon’s kiss was a show of tenderness, Jordan gave Stefan need and craving. His desire for Stefan was clear and bright as he pulled Stefan closer.

  “Most beautiful sight ever,” Gideon said. “I need to touch you both.” He wrapped his arms around them both while Jordan continued kissing Stefan senseless. “Mm, look at you two. Never thought I’d have this.”

  Stefan’s head was spinning when Jordan let up on the kiss. Jordan touched Stefan’s lips. “Look at them, Gid. Swollen, red, perfect for sucking cock, don’t you think?”

  Stefan flicked a glance at Gideon, who was studying him closely.

  Gideon shook his head slowly. “Parted while he’s panting and fucking you would be better right now.”

  “Fuck,” Jordan scraped out. “That. That one.”

  Gideon grinned. Stefan felt his lips curving up in a matching smile.

  Gideon rubbed his hands together then began stroking his own dick. “We’re going to have so much fun.”

  “Right after we have a word.”

  Gideon pivoted around and Stefan groaned, rolling his eyes.

  Conner stood, looking very fierce and…scowly, Stefan decided.

  “Conner, can’t it wait?” Stefan pleaded.

  Conner studied him for a moment. “Did you tell them?”

  “Yes, Dad,” Stefan whined. “Go away. I don’t want you watching.”

  Conner’s smile was wicked enough to scare the devil himself. “Oh, baby boy, fair’s fair. How many times have you watched?”

  “You watched Conner and Ro?” Gideon and Jordan both asked, sounding shocked.

  Stefan’s cheeks were so hot with a blush that he thought he might just turn into a human—or spirit—torch. “Yeah, and he knew it. Some of the others, probably not.” He shrugged. “I was bored, and I’m not the only one who—”

  Gideon kissed him until Stefan’s eyes crossed.

  “Guess we’ll just have to keep our man too busy to spy on anyone else,” Jordan said.

  Stefan broke the kiss long enough to speak. “I don’t watch anyone anymore. I haven’t—”

  Gideon plundered his mouth until all Stefan could do was whimper and cling to the man.

  “So what did you want, Conner?” Jordan asked. “Because we’re about to be very busy for a few days. Or longer.”

  Oh God! Days! Stefan hoped Jordan wasn’t exaggerating.

  “Just wanted to make sure y’all had all made up, really,” Stefan heard Conner say. “I’m going to leave y’all to it.”

  “Adios,” Jordan told him. “And we won’t forget. We won’t hurt Stefan, ever again.”

  “Good. Nice dick,” Conner said, and Stefan opened his eyes just in time to see Conner vanish.

  “Did he mean mine, yours, or yours?” Jordan asked, pointing to Gideon then Stefan.

  Stefan looked down at his shaft. “He’s seen mine before. Clothes are no big deal sometimes.”

  “I think he left it at that just to see if he could stir up an argument between the three of us,” Gideon grumbled.

  Conner’s laughter filtered into the room, then it was gone.

  “Asshole.” Jordan shook his head, then he laughed. Stefan and Gideon joined in, and Stefan felt free from his past in a way he hadn’t been able to before.

  Chapter Twelve

  “Do we have lube?” Gideon asked as he led them outside. “Do we need lube?”

  Jordan looked at Stefan, who seemed unsure.

  “I have an idea,” Gideon purred. “Let’s find a nice, moonlit field, and I’ll handle the rest.”

  “I know a place,” Stefan offered. “Come on.”

  Stefan was right, clothing wasn’t always a necessity. There was something particularly naughty about being outside and nude, even if people couldn’t see them. They took off, running in the air, laughing and groping, Jordan happier than he could remember being in ages.

  Stefan squealed when Jordan goosed him, getting a good handful of that sweet ass. Jordan wanted in there, but first, he wanted to give Stefan his promise of forever. Silly, sappy, romantic—Jordan figured he was all of those things. He was more than okay with it.

  Stefan veered around a grouchy-looking old man on the sidewalk. He went through a couple of other people, laughing when one of them paused and looked around furtively. “Some of them feel us, I think,” Stefan offered, then he shot up into the air.

  Jordan and Gideon were right on his tight little tail. Literally, with both of them touching his ass every chance they got. Stefan giggled and tried to dodge away, but Jordan rolled under him and latched onto Stefan’s dick. With his mouth.

  “Ack!” Stefan shrieked, stopping on the spot. “Don’t stop!”

  Jordan didn’t, as it made no difference where they were having sex, really. In the air, on the bed, it was all the same. They could float or not, and right now, he wanted to make sure Stefan floated right on into orgasm.

  Gideon got behind Stefan. “Lean over,” he urged.

  “What—” Stefan panted and curled over Jordan’s head. Jordan had a damn good idea of what Gideon was doing, and in seconds he was proven right as Stefan yelped and began undulating.

  Jordan knew Gideon was spreading Stefan’s cheeks and licking that sweet ass.

  “I haven’t,” Stefan began. “I—can’t… Would—”

  Jordan thought the babbling was adorable. He sucked Stefan’s cock in to the base and Stefan moaned, the sound deep and raw.

  He reached around to tangle his hand with Gideon’s on Stefan’s ass. Gideon tugged his hand over, positioning it so that Jordan could feel the wet skin of Stefan’s hole.

  Stefan wasn’t the only one who liked that. Jordan groaned around the long, thin cock in his mouth as he pushed his fingertip against the tight ring. Gideon’s tongue licked over it, then Gideon pressed the tip of that slick muscle into Stefan’s pucker.

  At the same time Jordan took Stefan’s shaft into his throat. He swallowed around it and slid his finger in alongside Gideon’s tongue.

  Even the living souls had to hear Stefan’s scream as he came, jerking and shaking so hard Jordan halfway expected him to fly apart. He eased his finger out and away from Stefan’s opening as Gideon shoved his tongue in deeper, eating Stefan’s ass like it was the finest dessert and Gideon’s sweet tooth was insatiable.

  Stefan came so much Jordan thought the poor guy was going to be emptied out for a day or two, but Stefan’s dick never did go soft in Jordan’s mouth.

  Jordan didn’t ease off until Gideon pulled Stefan back. Stefan was shivering and breathing unsteadily, his eyes closed and those red lips of his even more swollen, as if he’d been biting at them.

  Stefan’s eyes flew open as he gasped. He arched his back and Jordan scurried around to Stefan’s backside to see what was being done to him. Gideon grinned wickedly and hooked an arm around Stefan’s waist as he thrust a finger in and out of Stefan’s hole slowly.

  “Like this, sweetheart?” Gideon asked, gaze locked on Jordan.

  Jordan nodded, his own ass feeling empty, needy.

  “Yes,” Stefan said in a voice deepened by need. “God, never felt anything so good.”

  “Oh?” Gideon slid two fingers in.

  “Ah,” Stefan moaned, spreading his legs. Then he jolted and hissed.

  “Not even that?” Gideon asked. “Because that’s your prostate gland right…there.”

  “Jesus holy hell!” Stefan shouted, bending over to grab his knees. “Again!”

  Gideon chuckled and repeated the touch until Stefan was slamming back onto his fingers. “Yeah, this is gonna feel so good around my dick,” Gideon said, his shaft looking painfully hard. “I’ll fuck you so good you’ll weep.”

  Jordan would have scoffed at the line except for the fact that Stefan looked close to tears now, so desperate for release as he writhed and moaned.

  But Gideon withdrew his fingers. “Soon. Get us there. I want to watch you take Jordan.”

  “I want to feel him take me.” Jordan was well past eager to be fucked. Not just by Stefan either, but by Gideon, too, whenever Gideon was ready for him.