I must’ve fallen asleep because when I woke next it was completely dark outside. Immediately I looked over at the space next to me only to find it remained empty. Rolling over, I quietly scanned the room and saw it was empty as well.

  I gathered myself the best I could and moved from the room toward the stairwell. I could hear voices downstairs but none of them were the voice I wanted to hear. “How you feeling?” I hung my head and don’t even need to turn around to see Clayton standing behind me, I already know it’s him. And though I appreciated his concern, it wasn’t coming from the one person I needed most.

  “Do you know where he went?”

  “He left a couple hours ago.”

  This time I did turn around. “Left?”

  The normal silly, don’t give a shit cutup guy I’d come to know as Clayton was no longer the same. He looked concerned, maybe even saddened by the events. “Yeah.” He offered a kind smile but I knew it was forced. “I think he just needed some time alone.”

  Or time away from me.

  I hung my head as my tears fell without being able to stop them. I felt Clayton wrap his arms around me and I did nothing to reject his comfort. I needed anything I could get to keep me from falling completely apart.

  “This is hard for him.” I tried to understand, only him leaving solved nothing.

  “Can I borrow your phone?”

  “I’ve tried calling him already, Cat, he won’t answer.”

  “I don’t want to call him,” I confessed. “I want to call Marcus.”

  I pulled back from his embrace and looked up at him. “I don’t have anything with me, no phone, no car, he’s the only person I have.”

  “You’re wrong,” Clayton cupped my jaw in his hand, “you have everyone in this house on your side, Cat. Even him, he just doesn’t know what to do with the things he’s feeling right now.”

  I wanted to believe him; I just wasn’t sure my heart was capable of anything right then.

  “I’ll take you.” I didn’t argue when he led me toward the stairs. When I was safely tucked into his car and we were on our way to Marcus’ apartment, I stared out the window to my side. I didn’t have anything to say. I appreciated everything Clayton was doing for me, yet again I was heartbroken over Eli and his absence.

  ***

  I’d been in the shower so long the water had begun to cool. The hot water, so hot at first it felt as if it scalded me was now so cold I shivered. Yet I remained there, beneath the falling stream.

  I’m not sure what I was trying to accomplish. At that point I think I just wanted to feel the ache it was beginning to cause. My teeth chattered and the muscles in my back and shoulders were tense from shivering.

  A loud knock made me jump in reaction and I reached out to brace myself on the shower wall. “Catherine, are you okay?”

  I turned the handle and shut off the water quickly. “I’m good.”

  “That water has to be freezing,” Morgan added but I didn’t reply. “I put some clothes on the sink for you.”

  “I see them,” I said as I toweled off, my teeth still chattering from the cold. “Thanks,” I added, not wanting to appear unappreciative of all the things both she and Marcus had done for me.

  When I had arrived there Marcus was gone.

  It was Morgan who welcomed me inside after thanking Clayton for bringing me. It was also Morgan who offered me a glass of wine, a change of clothes, and a shower. All that after she held my head on her shoulder while I cried it all out for a good ten minutes after she told Clayton goodbye.

  I just felt so empty and lost inside my own head that I wasn’t sure what to do with all the things I was feeling.

  When I exited the bathroom I found both Morgan and Marcus waiting in the kitchen, Chinese takeout waiting. “Hey there, Buttercup.” Hearing him say my nickname triggered yet another round of emotions, only I was able to hold them back.

  “Smells great,” I said though I’m sure both of them could tell I was lying. At that point I didn’t think anything would appeal to me.

  We ate while Marcus attempted to entertain us with stories of the most ditzy woman in the world. He worked with Sasha, the daughter of his boss. Apparently if you told her putting food coloring in her bottled water would help her complexion she’d rush to the store to stock up on both.

  It felt good to smile and laugh, even though in the back of my mind that emptiness still lingered. And the pain in my chest still remained as I continued to picture the look on Eli’s face the moment before he left me standing alone in his room.

  I fell asleep that night feeling more alone than I had since before I met Elijah.

  Chapter Twenty-Eight

  Elijah

  I looked up just as Marcus opened the front door. “If you’ve come just to upset her—”

  “No,” I assured him, “I just need to sort some things out.”

  “She cried herself to sleep, ya know.” He may as well have kicked me in the nuts; it would have been less painful. “She thinks you’re embarrassed by her. Thinks things are over between you.”

  “Do you know how hard it is to know that she’d been going through those things and I couldn’t stop it?”

  “You didn’t know.” He looked back over his shoulder before quickly turning his gaze back to me. He spoke much softer now. “She didn’t want us to know. We can’t stop something we aren’t aware of and you can’t protect someone if you don’t know they’re in danger.”

  Nothing he’d said made me feel better. The fact of the matter was that I didn’t protect her. Nothing could make me feel better about that.

  “I just wanna see her,” I told him, feeling raw and exhausted. I’d spent the last six hours at my aunt’s going over what had happened with both her and Uncle Miles. They both told me the same things then Aunt Meg gave me hell for leaving her.

  “Please understand that she was ashamed and somehow in her mind she’d convinced herself that had anyone known, they would have felt she wasn’t good enough. She was wrong and I think she knows that now, but rehashing the wrongs we’ve all done won’t change that.”

  I nodded as he stepped aside and allowed me to enter.

  I stood back staring at the sleeping figure on the couch. My sweet girl was buried beneath the covers all the way up to her neck. Dark hair spilled out over the light color of the couch and a light snore filled the silence of the living room.

  “Nothing I say is meant to make you feel bad,” Marcus said. “I just want you to know how lost she’s been all night. I could tell she’s been completely lost in her thoughts, her doubts.”

  With a gentle squeeze of my shoulder Marcus left the living room and gave me the space I needed.

  Moving in closer to where Cat lay, I sat down on the coffee table and leaned over, resting my elbows on my knees. In the glow from the kitchen I could clearly see her face and found myself focusing on every twitch, every sigh.

  Seeing the cut on her bottom lip just brought back the pain and anger I felt when I first found that son of a bitch with his hands around her neck. A faint darkening of her eye did nothing to ease the tightening I felt in my chest.

  “I’m sorry,” I whispered, reaching out to run my finger along her cheek. She twitched and I paused, waiting for her to calm once more. “No one will ever hurt you again, including me.”

  “You didn’t hurt me.” Her hoarse whisper surprised me when I saw that her eyes were still closed. “You scared me.”

  “I never meant to, I just couldn’t stop myself once I started hitting him—”

  “Not that.” She finally opened her eyes. “I’m talking about you leaving.”

  I hung my head, feeling shameful for my actions. “It was hard for me to accept that you’d gone through the things you had. There were times you’d leave my house and go home to sleep in fear. I feel like somehow I failed you by not protecting you and keeping you away from that.”

  “Had you known, I know you would have protected me, so that’s on me, not you.”

  I slid off the table and kneeled on the floor next to her, gently brushing her hair back from her face. “You’ve had enough on you for far too long. Why don’t you let me take it now?”

  The shimmering, glossy look in her eyes made my throat feel tight.

  Leaning forward I pressed my forehead to hers and we both closed our eyes. I focused on her breathing, and I realized just how much it soothed me.

  “I love you,” I said without hesitation. Suddenly I felt her body shake against my own. I knew in my heart it wasn’t because she was saddened by my confession, just the opposite actually. “I’m so in love with Blake.”

  I said her first name, knowing it would show her my words were true.

  “You’ve lived far too long without feeling safe, far too long being forced to hide. No more hiding, baby, you’re never going back to that life.” I didn’t care what it took, hell, if I had to leave the fraternity and get my own place so I could help her afford to live on her own I would.

  “I’m moving in here,” she whispered, and I smiled, knowing that she’d be happy here. “Marcus added their name to a wait list for a three bedroom over a month ago.”

  “I knew I liked that guy for a reason.”

  I leaned in and kissed her eye softly before moving to her lip. Ever so gently I kissed both her lips too. I still felt nearly destroyed with the knowledge that anyone had laid a hand on her. I wanted to fucking kill both her mother and stepfather for doing the things they had done.

  “Do you really love me?”

  I sat on the floor and moved the blanket down lower, exposing her neck and her shoulders, and began to trace over her collarbone with the tip of my finger. “I’m so fucking in love with you that the thought of anything happening to you is crippling. You own me, sweet girl, and I think you have since the moment I first saw you in Porter’s. All the time since you’ve just been digging your way in deeper.”

  “I love you too.”

  Feeling raw before had absolutely nothing on how I felt hearing those three words.

  “Promise me something.” She nodded when I said those words. “Promise that no matter what it is, you’ll come to me? No more secrets.”

  “Can I take you home with me?” I asked after a moment of silence and she shook her head, making my stomach tense in disappointment.

  “I’m too tired to even think of moving right now.”

  It was understandable; she’d been through so much, not just with her parents but me too.

  “Got room up there?”

  She laughed quietly. “For you?”

  “Yeah.”

  “You’re bigger than the average human, Eli, there’s no way the both of us are going to fit on this couch.” She looked from left to right, then back to me as if mentally measuring the space. “No way.”

  “We can surely make it work,” I said as I scooped her up. “You’ll just have to be on top.”

  Chapter Twenty-Nine

  Catherine

  “Are you sure he’ll even allow you to go?” I laughed when I caught Morgan rolling her eyes. “Because I think we’ve all noticed over the last week or two just how protective and territorial Red has been when it comes to you.”

  She wasn’t lying; since my fallout he had been a hovering fool.

  “He’s actually gone for a game.”

  “What about your tracking device? Won’t he know you’ve left and send out his crew?” I couldn’t help but snicker, thinking how he assigned Clayton and Corbin to babysit me.

  “If you need to go anywhere you call them,” I did my best Eli impression. “I mean anything, and Clayton has been told that he better be available to you.”

  “Does he not realize Clayton and Corbin are the two most accident prone guys in the house?” Morgan gathered her bag and keys.

  “I want to go, really,” I told her as I walked behind her toward the door. “I’ve heard so much about the infamous Toby the Turtle and I know I’m missing out by not meeting him.”

  “I’m not on the approved list though,” she teased. “You need to tell Red that I am slightly offended by that, too.”

  I knew she was teasing but I grabbed my phone from my bag and dialed his number anyway.

  “Everything okay?”

  “Well, hello to you too, and yes, everything is good,” I said, rolling my eyes as Morgan held her hands as if to say see, told you so.

  “I was just calling to tell you that Morgan is severely disappointed in your choice of security for me.”

  “Is that right?” I could almost sense the humor in his eyes. “Why would that be?”

  Before I could say anything more Morgan reached out and took the phone from my hands.

  “Oh really,” she said after a pause, “I’m not sure Xavier would like it if I did that with you, but if things don’t work out there, I’ll let you know.”

  I could only imagine what it was he’d said to her.

  “Yes, darlin’ it’s Morgan.” She laughed after he’d replied. I felt so lost with this conversation not being able to hear him talk too. “So back to the reason I’m irritated. You left the two most irresponsible goofballs in the house with your girl’s safety in their hands. Are you insane? Too many hits to the head on the field.”

  Again she laughed.

  “Exactly, so I’ll be taking over for now. She’s gonna go with me to my parents’ place and hang out with Toby.” Another pause. “Of course I will let him know his man Red says hi.”

  “Okay, giving you back to Blake now, and I promise to keep your hidden lust for me quiet from Xavier. No need to start some kind of war.”

  By the time I had the phone back and pressed to my ear I heard his deep chuckle and instantly missed him like crazy. “When you coming back?”

  “Tomorrow night,” he said. “It’ll be late, which is why I want you sleeping in my bed when I get there. I’d come to you, but what I have in mind should not be done on a couch in view of Morgan and Marcus.”

  Chills covered my arms as images of all the things he might be talking of filled my mind.

  “I’ll be there.”

  “Good, because if you were gonna say no, I would’ve been stopping off there first and carrying you out kicking and screaming over my shoulder.” Someone yelled something and he covered the phone to yell back that he was coming. “Listen, I gotta go, babe, but you have fun with Toby. Be prepared to watch Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles a few times.”

  “What is that, a cartoon?”

  He grew silent and I pulled the phone from my ear to make sure we were still connected. When I saw we were I put it back in place and said “hello?”

  “You’re joking, right?”

  “No.”

  “Have you been living under a rock, woman? You are about to be schooled.”

  ***

  “How did I not know about these guys?” I asked as I stared at the television and saw the monster turtles kick some Shredder ass. “This is the coolest movie ever.”

  I was so glued to the movie that I had not finished my pizza. By that time it had grown cold but I didn’t care; I had found a new love. There was now a debate as to which one of us—Toby or myself—loved the Turtles more.

  “This is also the best room ever.” I looked around for what felt like the tenth time, slowly taking in everything around me. “I wish I lived in this room.” Toby smiled so big I could tell he loved this place too.

  “Xavier and Marcus decorated it for Toby and we will slowly be adding a few things here and there.” Morgan leaned forward and grabbed her Pepsi. “He hardly ever leaves this room now.” She smiled as she nudged her brother’s shoulder. “Isn’t that right, Toby Turtle?”

  It made me laugh when he started bobbing his head as he held out his hands, waving them around, signaling to his space. “Mine,” he said, loud and clear.

  Once he got back on focus with his movie, Morgan placed her drink back down and looked over at me. “Have you heard anything from your mother or him?”

  I shake my head.

  “When are you supposed to be able to get your things?”

  “Well, the car is gone, because unfortunately it was in Carl’s name. Everything inside my room may or may not still be there, but I get to go over there and collect what’s left this week.”

  “It’s nice that Jay’s father knows the district attorney.”

  I nodded. “To be honest, I’m scared,” I confessed, feeling my stomach tense. “Scared to face either of them, and also scared of what I’ll find, or not find, I guess. I could go there and find that they’ve gotten rid of everything. Then I’ll be forced to start over with only the clothes I have. I’m just thankful that Xavier and Clayton grabbed my purse and that Eli brought me my money. I can get the things I need to get by and my purse had the three things I have to remember my father.”

  I looked at Morgan and she offered me a kind smile.

  “So if I go and there’s nothing, then there’s nothing. At least I have the opportunity to start over, thanks to all of you.”

  Since I’d been at Morgan’s and Marcus’, she and I had really developed a close friendship. It was nice to have friends.

  Chapter Thirty

  Elijah

  I stripped down to nothing but my boxers and climbed under the sheets, curling my body around hers. When she sighed I smiled, my mouth pressed against her hair. Was it crazy that I enjoyed the way it tickled my nose?

  “I missed you,” I confessed and didn’t expect her to reply, but she did. “I missed you too.”

  Leaning back, she turned in my arms and slid as close as possible to press her body to my own. At that moment I froze. “Babe.”

  “Mmhm.”

  I tried not to laugh, fuck, but it was impossible. “Did you fall asleep with the bedroom door unlocked?”

  “I’m not sure, why?” she asked with her eyes still closed.

  “Clayton drew on your face.”

  Her eyes shot open and locked on my own. “Drew as in how?”