Chapter Thirty-Nine

  Vanessa

  Friday, 22 December 2017

  ‘You aren’t allowed to be here. It’s dangerous, you need to stay back!’

  Vanessa was trying to push through the barriers and tape surrounding the grounds of The Vicarage. A man in a hard hat was shouting at her as she begged for him to stop the demolition work. The noise was deafening, tons of machinery that had been waiting for weeks to pounce now finally unleashed. She watched as a digger scooped up mounds of earth, tears pouring down her cheeks at the thought of what was left of Alice being torn to shreds.

  Over the sound of the wrecking ball smashing at the side of the house, she heard someone shouting, and turned to see a woman running towards her, waving her arms. She was yelling at the man in the cab of the wrecking ball, frantically pointing at the house. Finally the driver saw and turned the engine off as Vanessa heard what the woman was yelling to him.

  ‘There’s a little girl in there! Sienna Hilton is inside that house!’

  ‘What?’ the man shouted at her, pulling his ear defenders away so he could hear her.

  ‘There’s a little girl in there!’ she said, running into what was left of the house as Vanessa followed. Vanessa stopped dead, a wall of brick dust made it impossible to see as one of the men came running in after her. ‘You can’t be in here!’ he said, tugging at her arm. ‘It could collapse any second, we need to get out of here, now!’ He was coughing desperately as Vanessa tried to look around; the brick dust was clinging to her nose and mouth.

  As the dust began to settle Vanessa saw the woman starting to lift away the mounds of brick by the fallen staircase. Instinctively Vanessa walked over and sank to her knees, starting to lift the piles of broken cement and smashed debris away.

  ‘Be quiet! Everyone be quiet!’ Willow shouted as Helen came flying through the door crying and looking around desperately.

  ‘We have to get you out, you could all be killed.’

  ‘Be quiet!’ shouted Willow, shocking the man into stunned silence.

  Above the creaking of the breaking building they suddenly heard the faint sound of a child crying.

  Helen screamed, realising that her little girl had been buried alive. She turned to the men standing in the doorway. ‘Please help us! My daughter is under there.’

  The mood in the room suddenly changed, as everyone blocked out the creaking sounds of the building giving way and launched themselves at the piles of bricks and rubble under which Sienna was buried, and began frantically digging.

  The ceiling above them groaned from the strain of being held up by only two walls, as the pile of debris grew smaller and smaller. Every pair of bleeding hands moving as fast as humanly possible.

  ‘The building is going to collapse, we have to get out of here!’ shouted one of the men.

  ‘Quiet!’ called Willow again, and once more the room fell silent.

  ‘Sienna?’ shouted Helen.

  ‘Mummy!’ cried the little voice, as the building groaned again, with its final dying breaths.

  ‘She’s over here!’ Willow shouted. ‘Everyone, help me get this wooden beam up. Now!’ Willow beckoned them all over, and on the count of three, they heaved the beam up and it crashed on to the ground next to them.

  Suddenly through the smoke of brick dust, Vanessa saw a tiny hand appear.

  ‘She’s here!’ Willow shouted, and taking Sienna’s hand, she squeezed it tight. ‘Hold on, Sienna!’

  With a sickening groan, the third side of the house began to collapse. Some of the demolition workers rushed out of the building, but two stayed behind, scrabbling frantically at the remnants of the brick and beams to try and uncover the little girl.

  Sienna was screaming and crying as they pulled at her trapped leg, desperately trying to free her from the ton of demolished stairwell which had collapsed on top of her. Helen and Willow frantically pulled at a beam which had fallen on a piece of the priest-hole door and finally it rolled back. They lifted it off, freeing the little girl as the roof began to give way.

  ‘Get out of here now!’ shouted one of the men as the other one scooped Sienna up in his arms, and the five of them rushed from the ruins as the building let out an almighty roar as the final wall of The Vicarage collapsed on itself and turned into a cloud of smoke and dust.

  Chapter Forty

  Helen

  Friday, 22 December 2017

  Helen sat between her daughter and her brother in the hospital corridor. Sienna had been given a pink cast for her broken ankle, which she was busy showing off to Bobby.

  ‘The nurse said I was the bravest little girl she had ever met.’

  Bobby looked down at her and smiled. ‘Did she now? Your mummy’s very brave too. She went away to hospital when she was about your age, all on her own.’

  Sienna nodded. ‘Will you sign my plaster?’ she asked Bobby, pulling a pen out from her pocket.

  He smiled. ‘Of course.’

  ‘Any news of Leo?’ he asked Helen as he began to draw on Sienna’s cast.

  ‘Yes, they got him just as he was boarding a flight. He’s at the police station now, being interviewed. He’s been borrowing against the house for years and owes a great deal of money, and he’s been lying to a lot of people. He and the architect falsified documents for the application.’

  ‘The architect? But that’s Willow, isn’t it?’ Bobby frowned.

  ‘No, someone called Mike, Willow’s boss, who worked closely with Leo on it. Apparently they forged all kinds of things to get the planning approved. They’re charging them both with fraud.’

  ‘Oh dear. Is Willow caught up in it?’ Bobby asked, concerned.

  ‘I asked the police about that, and apparently it was obvious to them that she knew nothing about it. Mike and Leo kept her in the dark on purpose. She’s given a statement, but she’s got so many fans in the village, I think they’d have a riot on their hands if they tried to charge her with anything.’ She smiled. ‘She’s an amazing girl, Bobby, you must be very proud of her. She saved Sienna’s life.’

  ‘I am.’

  ‘What is it?’ asked Sienna as Bobby finished his drawing.

  ‘It’s a willow, my favourite tree.’ Bobby smiled at her. ‘According to my father, it represents the ability to let go of pain and suffering, to grow new, strong and bold.’ He winked at Sienna, who smiled and wandered off towards the glow of the vending machine.

  ‘And what about Alice?’ he said, leaning into Helen.

  She glanced over at her daughter, who was busy eyeing up the contents of the machine.

  ‘He’s admitted to moving her body, which is obstruction of justice apparently.’ She looked down at her feet.

  ‘And are they going to want to talk to you about that too?’ Bobby asked gently.

  ‘Yes, they have, but Dorothy has told them how abusive Leo was; they call it coercive control. Dorothy is in quite a lot of trouble for hiding Sienna. I’m really hoping they don’t come down on her too hard, but the whole Sussex police force was involved in the search, so it’s not looking good for her. I had no idea she had her. I still can’t believe she’d put me through that.’

  She looked down again. ‘I’m sorry I never told the police about Alice. Leo made me feel like I didn’t have a choice. He told me they’d put me in prison, and then later that they’d take Sienna away. He’s worked on me since I was seven years old, and I believed him.’ She started to cry.

  ‘I just wish you’d told me,’ Bobby said. ‘We could have worked it out.’

  ‘Dad only ever wanted us to have The Vicarage,’ Nell said sadly. ‘If the Hiltons had given it to him, none of this would have happened.’

  Bobby took her hand. ‘Well, my solicitor seems to think we’ve got a chance of getting our share of the estate. They can do DNA tests now, apparently. And prove Dad’s paternity.’

  ‘And Leo can’t contest it?’

  Bobby shook his head and took her hand. ‘He can’t hurt you any more, Nell. We’ll be okay.’

  ‘You can go in now,’ said a nurse, appearing at the door.

  Helen took Sienna’s hand, and they all walked into Willow’s room, where she was sitting up in bed smiling.

  ‘You’ve got a cast too!’ said Sienna, bounding over to the bed. Willow’s shoulder was strapped up and her elbow was in plaster. ‘How come you get purple? I want purple!’

  Willow smiled. ‘Hi, Sienna, how are you feeling? This is Charlie, my boyfriend.’

  Charlie winked at her. ‘Hi, Sienna, I’ve heard a lot about you. I hear you’ve been extremely brave.’

  Sienna giggled. ‘Are you two going to get married?’

  ‘Nope! She doesn’t want to marry me,’ he said, pulling a sad face.

  ‘But we are having a baby,’ said Willow.

  Helen’s stomach did a flip, as she grabbed Willow’s hand. ‘You’re pregnant? Did you know that when you went into the house to rescue Sienna?’

  Willow nodded. ‘It was when the world was crashing down around me that I realised how much it meant to me.’ She looked at Charlie, who winked at her.

  ‘Is the baby okay?’ said Bobby, frowning.

  ‘Yes, it’s fine, it’s got a good strong heartbeat.’

  ‘Does that mean I’m going to be an auntie?’ said Sienna.

  ‘No, you’re going to be a cousin.’ Charlie smiled at her.

  ‘I’m so sorry, Willow, I . . . .’ Helen began, as her voice trembled.

  ‘Stop, it’s not your fault. None of it is your fault. I’m just glad we’re all together finally.’ Willow squeezed her hand tighter and looked at her father.

  ‘How are you feeling?’ Bobby asked, smiling warmly at his sister.

  ‘Better than I have done in a long time,’ said Helen. I’m so proud of you, Willow. I heard about your boss. I’m sorry. Is your job safe?’

  She shrugged. ‘I don’t know, but I’ll be on maternity leave before I know it, and then after that I can have a think. I wouldn’t mind trying to work for myself although Dad tells me he’s coming into a bit of inheritance so I think I might take a year or two off.’

  ‘Easy!’ said Bobby, laughing as Willow smiled warmly at her dad. ‘Is Vanessa okay, have you seen her?’ Willow looked over at Helen.

  ‘Sienna and I are going to see her now,’ said Helen. ‘She’s in a private room. According to the doctor, she’s terribly confused; she doesn’t remember anything that happened when you saved Sienna.’

  ‘It must have been hell for you living with her all these years, trying to keep your secret.’ Willow looked at her sympathetically. ‘I understand that they’ve found Alice’s remains, so we can give her a proper burial. She was in the graveyard that Leo and Mike were trying to hide from the developers. According to Tessa’s notebook, there were a lot of women buried there – women she tried to help and who took refuge in the priest-hole.’

  ‘Can we go and see Granny now?’ Sienna was tugging at Helen’s hand.

  Helen looked down at her and smiled.

  ‘We’ll be back in a minute,’ she told the others, and allowed herself to be pulled out into the hall.

  Sienna skipped along beside her as Helen followed the signs to Vanessa’s ward.

  ‘Granny may call you Alice again, sweetheart; she’s very confused now. Is that okay with you?’

  ‘I don’t mind,’ said Sienna cheerfully. ‘If it makes her happy.’

  Helen smiled down at her daughter. She still couldn’t believe she had her back. Every second together now felt like a gift. Like being reborn. A life like Vanessa’s, torn apart with grief and pain, had so nearly been hers. It was terrifying to think about.

  Finally they reached Vanessa’s room and knocked on the door.

  ‘Come in!’ Vanessa’s voice was faint.

  Helen eased open the door and peered in. Vanessa was sitting up in bed, looking much worse than Helen had been expecting. She had oxygen in her nose, and her face was deathly pale. Helen was worried that Sienna would be upset, but she just bounded onto the bed like nothing was amiss.

  ‘Granny,’ she said, wrapping her arms round her grandmother’s neck. Vanessa slowly lifted her arm and put it around her granddaughter.

  ‘Careful with your cast, darling.’

  Vanessa lay back and looked at the little girl. ‘I missed you. We couldn’t find you.’

  ‘I know. I got locked in the priest-hole at The Vicarage, but they rescued me.’ Sienna ran her hands through her grandmother’s hair.

  ‘I was so worried about you, Alice, my darling. We didn’t know where you were.’ A tear rolled down Vanessa’s cheek. Sienna smiled up at Helen and winked. She understood completely.

  ‘I’m okay now, Mummy. I’ll be fine. You don’t need to worry about me any more. I’m safe.’

  Helen turned away so that Sienna couldn’t see her crying. The empathy and wisdom of her little girl was almost too much for her to bear.

  Vanessa started to doze off, clinging to Sienna’s hand.

  ‘You sleep now, Mummy. I love you.’

  ‘I love you too, Alice. I love you so much.’

  Fighting back her tears, Helen watched as Vanessa drifted off to sleep, then held out her hand for Sienna to take. The little girl kissed her beloved grandmother, then jumped down off the bed.

  Helen took her daughter’s hand and pulled her into her, clinging so tight she felt she would never be able to let her go. Then they took one more look at Vanessa sleeping and quietly left the room.

  Epilogue

  January 1946

  My darling Bella,

  By the time you read this, I will no doubt have been found guilty of manslaughter, and will be facing a life sentence.

  But I knew as soon as I was charged with this crime I had no hand in that I could not take the stand. Being cross-examined would mean taking an oath where I would have to tell the truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth.

  I would no doubt have been forced to answer questions about the women I am proud to have helped during my life as a midwife. Women who came to me to tell me of their husbands forcing themselves on them days after childbirth. Of not being physically strong enough to bear another child. Girls too young to give birth who had been raped by their brothers or fathers, begging me not to tell of their shame. Girls I have helped by giving their babies away to women who wanted a child but were unable.

  I promised these girls and women that I would keep their secrets, that I would guard them with my life. Some of them will have been in court with me, sitting by their husbands, who would have beaten or even murdered them had I spoken their truths.

  I am deeply sorry for what this means for you and Alfie. That I cannot take my place on the witness stand and tell the world that I loved Evelyn Hilton, that I would never cut a woman like Dr Jenkins did. That night is forever burnt in my mind, however hard I try and forget. He butchered Evelyn’s tiny body, and starved her baby of oxygen, then got Sally to call for me at The Vicarage when he realised what he had done. He left me there to watch them both die and take the blame.

  That day was the worst day of my life. It was the same day Wilfred told me that Eli had been killed, the day you lost the love of your life and Alfie lost his father.

  And it was my last day as a midwife.

  But I am not afraid. I am grateful. I love what I have spent my life doing. Being your mother and Alfie’s grandmother is my greatest honour.

  Do not be sad, my love. You are a James. We are not victims, we are free. I am at peace knowing that I helped to create a world that we can be proud of, and that I kept my word.

  I told those women that I would take their secrets to my grave.

  And I have kept my promise.

  I love you, my darling, be strong until we meet again.

  Mama xxxx

  Acknowledgements

  Thrashing out ideas with interesting, clever people – whilst trying not to disappear down rabbit holes – is the best part of writing books. Often those I talk to have no idea how much they’ve helped me, so with that in mind a huge thank you to Vicky Newman for her endless patience and sharing of medical knowledge, and also to Sarah Harris and Alexis Stickland for the midwifery chats. Thank you to the wonderful Marion Wilyman for our conversations about the changing face of midwifery over the decades, and to prison officer Danny for sharing his extensive experience about the HMS prison system. Also, to Anna Blowfield for her help with my prison chaplain queries and for steering me towards extraordinary prison chaplain Phil Chadder, who helped me hugely.

  Huge thanks also to Marita Bianco who carefully pieced together my survey related issues and Asia Jedrzejec who gave endless time and a much-needed female perspective on my architecture strand. Thanks go to Jeremy Pendlebury (7BR chambers) and Valeria Swift who were both extremely patient in trying to help me understand criminal trials. As was Sue Stapely; always a font of knowledge and contacts. Thank you also to horse goddess Emma Lucas for her expertise.

  Finally, thank you to my wonderful editor, Sherise Hobbs, who always brings out/extracts the best in me, and to my agent, Kate Barker. A debt of gratitude to my beloved, Steven Gunnis, for always digging me out of cold, hopeless plot holes. Thank you to my girls, Grace and Eleanor, for their patience in putting up with me living in other worlds rather a lot of the time, and to the dear friends – Rebecca Cootes, Clodagh Hartley, Harry De Bene, Suzanne Lindfors, Jessica Balkwill, Helen Tullis, Jessica Kelly, Kate Osbaldeston, Sue Kerry, Claudia Vincenzi and Sophie Cornish – who got me through lockdown; working with kids at home has not been easy on anyone.

  I raise a glass to you all!

  Author’s Note

  I, like many others, have always been fascinated by midwives. For as long as women have assisted other women in childbirth, many cultures have believed that midwives possess some supernatural secret wisdom. In the past, midwives have even been tried and killed as witches, so powerful was their knowledge of natural remedies and womanly ways. Indeed, no job title incites more fascination or interest than that of a midwife.