I speed around the corner of the empty road just in time to see a swarm of bees fly straight into John on the bike. The helmet does little to hide his pure panic as the swarm attacks him. He screams and lets go of the handles of the bike to no doubt pull the helmet off where the bees must have gotten inside. The bike rapidly turns, heading straight into a barrier of the cliff. Like it’s a damn movie, everything slows as John is flung off the bike as it crashes into the barrier, and he goes flying into the air over the very large and steep cliff. I slam on the brakes on my bike in a panic, letting it fall to the ground as I set off running to the barrier, expecting to see a flat and very dead John at the bottom of the cliff. I breathe out a sigh of relief when instead I see John holding onto a branch, hanging over a very dirty looking pond at the bottom of the cliff. It’s one hell of a drop, though. Poor John is having a very bad day.

  "HELP!" he screams at me. “Please help me!”

  "Yep, I'm coming!" I shout back at him, climbing onto the barrier and getting to the other side. I pull my charms out, finding the one for rope. It’s a plain flat circle, but if you look closely, you can see the never ending rope that is tied inside it. I shake the circle sphere a few times, pretending that John’s screams aren’t getting louder and more desperate. I glance down at him, seeing his beefy arms that make his head look ridiculously small in comparison. It’s okay, he can hold himself up for sure. The sphere spreads out into a bigger flat circle after a few shakes. I reach into the silver shimmering liquid inside the circle to pull out a long piece of magic rope that will never end. John continues to scream, like that is helping anybody, as I tie the rope to the barrier and the other part around my waist.

  "For the love of gods, can you be quiet? I need a moment of silence to talk myself into this as I don't like heights," I shout to John, who doesn't seem to care one bit as he continues to scream. I shake my head, wondering why I'm bothering when I could leave the douchebag to fall into the pond. It looks deep enough for him survive the fall. Possibly. No, I’m the better person, and I can’t just walk away from this when I’m pretty sure this is all my fault. Or at least that is how my family will see it when they find out. I turn myself around while muttering about how high the drop is before forcing myself to start walking down the rocks, lowering myself on the rope as I go. I don't know how long it is before I get near John, and he straightaway grabs my ankle. The grip is so strong that I cry out from his weight.

  "Wait a second, don't do that!" I shout at him, trying to shake him off as he pulls on my leg, trying to climb up me. I'm no rope, dude. The idiot lets go of the branch altogether, wrapping both his arms around my legs, and the rope drops us a tad. I scream, trying to shake him off as the rope slips from my hands, cutting into them as I desperately try to hold his weight up with mine. This is not what I had planned. What kind of feckin’ gobshite is he? He is going to kill us both.

  "Do I look like a bodybuilder who can hold your weight as well as my own, you feckin' eegit!" I shout at John, who is screaming and shaking as he holds onto my legs, completely ignoring me. My first hand slips just before I can do nothing but shriek as the rope falls from my hands, somehow letting me fall through the rope tied around my stomach. As I fall through the cold air, I brace myself to hit the pond water just as someone slams into me. I open my eyes, seeing my brother floating in the air above me, struggling to hold us all up with a shiny barrier of blue light. He holds a spear in his hand, and the tip glows the same blue as the barrier. My brother and his magical stick to the rescue again.

  "Karma Maria Kismet. Give me your friggin’ hand." Ah crap. I smile up at Peyton as he shouts his demand, sounding just like mum when she is mad as hell. I reach up, slamming my hand into his just as John, the moron, pulls hard on my leg as he screams. My leg slams through the magical barricade, my hand slipping from Peyton’s, and there is nothing to stop us as we all fall into the dirty water. I swim up to the surface, gasping air into my lungs as I wipe my eyes to see John come up right in front of me. He screams as he sees me, like I’m not the person that just tried to save his sorry ass. How ungrateful. A second later, my brother’s head appears out of the water to my right, and he looks like he just wants to murder me. Fair enough, I can’t actually blame him.

  "Hey, bro...how are you?" I awkwardly ask. “I see you had a haircut…”

  "Why am I always saving your arse, Karma?" he asks, glaring at me before swimming towards the edge of the pond. After a while, I see that Peyton pulls himself out of the pond and shakes his long red hair of the green water before crossing his arms. I shrug before turning around and swimming to the end of the pond, a bit away from him as I’m not stupid, and pulling myself out. My clothes are ruined, and I hold in a squeal as I pull out a small fish from my hair and throw it back in the pond.

  "I didn't need any help. The pond broke our fall," I point out as I see Pey looking at me like I should be saying sorry or thank you. I don’t know which one he expects, but he isn’t getting either.

  "Y-you were flying!" John shouts, saving me from having to say anything at all. John screams at Peyton as he gets out of the water and then starts running into the forest in front of us. I look at Peyton, and we both burst into laughter, neither one us able to stop laughing for a little bit.

  “See, it’s not all bad. Just a little mess up, and I could have handled it,” I say when the laughter dies off.

  "That pond has sharp rocks at the bottom, and it would have killed you if you fell without me stopping you," he points out. "Now I'm going to find whoever that screaming idiot is, wipe his memory, and then we can get going. I feckin’ stink, Karma."

  "I didn't know he was going to fall off a cliff, now did I?" I say, squeezing the pond water out my hair as Peyton walks past me.

  "Somehow, you never seem to have any blame for every job that goes wrong," he tells me. "Lucky you have a family to get your arse out of trouble, isn't it, little sis?"

  "I don't mess up every job," I point out. "It's like one out of five, and I think that's pretty good."

  "Not for a karma god, sis," he reminds me. "Now your guy is going to forget today, including his bad karma and get away with whatever he did. Without true karma, the world would be ruined. You need to get better at this." With his gloomy warning that makes me feel bad, he jogs into the forest after poor John. I lie back on the grass, looking up at the rocky cliff and bright blue sky. At least it's a nice day for John to have gone swimming.

  Chapter Three

  “You won’t tell anyone about the cliff diving incident, will you?” I ask as we appear on the pathway in front of our house in a little village just south of Dublin. Peyton lifts his bushy red eyebrows at me and just shakes his head before he opens the small white picket fence and walks down the white stone path to our house. I’m taking his no answer as a yes, or at least hoping so. I really don’t need to hear our younger brothers laughing over this or see our parents’ expressions of disappointment. I gaze up at the house I grew up in and still currently live in. It’s not a good idea for me to live in an apartment or a small house somewhere yet. Humans would notice my lack of a job, or they could notice weird things that are magical happening by accident. Humans have a curious nature, and I really don’t mind living with my family. We keep to ourselves, and the house is spelled so it is much bigger than it looks.

  The house has a brown cobbled stone exterior, small white panelled windows, and moss growing up the one side. It’s the very definition of cute little houses and the very last place you’d expect a family of karma gods to live. The street is full of these little detached houses with long gardens behind them, and in front of our house is the local park, which was awesome to live by as a kid. My old primary and high school are two streets over, and there is a row of shops on the other side of the village. It has everything you could want, and really, you don’t have to leave unless you want more than a humble life.

  I cross my arms as the wind blows against me, making the god awful smell of pond water that much stronger. I need a shower like yesterday. I walk through the door that Peyton left open and close it behind me as I smell mum’s cooking and then the undertones of polish. Something is up. Mum doesn’t get the polish out unless there is a good reason. The house is warm, bright and relaxing from the moment you step inside.

  “Karma, there you are! Your brother has a new girlfriend, and he is bringing her back for dinner! Isn’t that lovely?” mum excitedly says the moment the door shuts. I glance at her flowery top tucked into dark trousers and her dark red hair pulled neatly into a bun. Her eyes are like mine, big and green, but she is taller than I am which isn’t fair.

  “Does she know what we are?” I ask, a little bit curious. “And which one of my dipshit brothers is she unluckily dating?”

  “None of that talk in my house, young lady!” my mum shouts, putting her hands on her hips as I take my coat off, frowning at the state of the leather with green algae on it. I smirk up at Pey who shakes his head as I hear him laugh. Our younger brothers are dipshits, and mum damn well knows it. “Now, the girlfriend is human and hasn’t a clue about us yet. So, I mean it, no magic or messing around. We don’t want to scare her off.”

  “No idea at all? Oh god, she is going to be like that last human girl you brought back who ran out the house screaming,” I say, looking at Peyton.

  “Yeah, humans and us, well, we don’t mix well. I doubt I’m ever going to find a decent human woman who isn’t frightened by our family. It’s only the weird ones who like this shit,” Pey comments. “Though it was a real shame with that one. She was blonde, with these massive—” Pey stops when I whack him on the arm and flash him a disgusted look. There are some things sisters do not need to know about their older brother.

  “This is your brother’s first real girlfriend, so we are going to behave and act like humans for one meal. Understood?” mum demands, looking all flustered. So, this must be my youngest brother who is bringing a girl home. Damien is only seventeen and clearly crazy if he thinks bringing home a girl is a good idea. Peyton and Hugo have learnt that humans and this house isn’t a good idea, though Hugo has a long term girlfriend now, one who knows what we are and is cool with it. My mum is itching for him to propose to her. I’m sure she will drop another hint tonight at the meal. Peyton may be the oldest of us all at twenty-nine, but he never did find a woman who can accept the truth of our lives. I don’t even know how I would tell a guy about all this. Dating is damn hard for gods, especially since we can’t date other gods. Mum messes with her shirt and starts fixing her hair, looking more flustered by the moment. Where the hell is dad to calm her down? Somehow, my awesome dad can just look at mum and, almost magically, she relaxes. He’s human though, so it’s not really magic.

  “How are you going to explain the talking goat then, mum?” I ask, glancing at the five family photos behind her of us all, and Michael the goat in each one of them. See, my mother is a highly competitive woman, and unfortunately, so is the human neighbour. Mum competitively grew a flower garden that got bigger and bigger every day until the neighbour got a water fountain built in with a light show. Now, mum couldn’t let that go, and being what we are, she used her powers to sense that our neighbour was, and still is, terrified of goats. Therefore, naturally, we have a goat. Which my mum named after Michael, the next door neighbour. Only issue? It’s a bloody cursed goat that talks and likes to mess with the neighbour more than mum does. I have to admit it’s pretty funny to see the human running into his house from his garden after Michael whispers things through the hole in the fence.

  “Michael is eating the vegetables I got him today at the end of the garden, it won’t be an issue,” she says, waving a hand. “Now go and shower. You both smell of pond, car oil and god knows what else.”

  “Got it,” I say, wanting to quickly get out of here before mum questions why we smell like that. I do not want to explain how I messed up another job and Pey had to save me. Again.

  Chapter Four

  After finishing towel drying my hair, because applying any kind of heat to my frizzy hair would be madness, I open my wardrobe. Choosing a green top that says "I have hidden secrets" and a pair of skinny jeans, I pull them on and reach down to the three layers of shoes at the bottom of the wardrobe.

  "You are all so pretty," I whisper, loving my collection of high heels that I may have a little problem with buying. Though at least it's not drugs or magic injections...or I tell myself that whenever I buy another pair of high heels. I can't see any reason why anyone wouldn't love them. I have a good list of reasons why heels are the best creation…well, after peanut butter, that is. Reason one, they make you taller. That's a pretty important reason when you're five foot, three inches, and everyone in your life is taller than you. These heels give me a chance. Reason two...well, they are just pretty. What else could be a better reason? Reason three, they are good weapons to throw at sleezeball ex-boyfriends. I pull out a shiny black pair with black glitter bows on the back. They are adorable. I slide them on before shutting the wardrobe and checking my reflection once more before leaving my small bedroom.

  I close the door and look down the long corridor at all the shut doors, secretly hoping they are all at the meal already and I won't have to make small talk with this human girl. Seventeen-year-olds are usually annoying—I was at that age for sure. I make sure to stay on the right side of the corridor as I pass the haunted painting that mum bought dad for his fortieth birthday, not knowing it was haunted. The painting is of an old house with yellow glowing windows, and randomly, a hand will jump out of the painting and grab you. How mum just thought it was a nice painting, I will never know.

  “I have a dare for you, sis,” my Tweedledee dumb brother asks, stopping me on the stairs. Hugo has black hair, making him look like the oddball in a family of redheads, but trust me, he is the oddest one. I'm sure of it. Hugo looks just like my dad; they have the same nose and eyes and the same temperament at times. Both of them like to act crazy and then blame it on someone else.

  “Don’t do this. If you dare me, I have to do it on principal, and then I have to dare you back. Then the whole family gets involved, and the next thing you know, the house is full of shitting ducks,” I mutter. "Mum banned us from making dares, remember?"

  “That happened one time, and it was pretty funny to see mum’s face when that duck landed on her head,” he replies. "And mum wasn't serious. I don't think she was anyway."

  “You’re right, that was pretty funny,” I grin, and roll my eyes as he excitedly watches me. “Say it then, Hugo.”

  "I dare you to invite Michael to the meal," Hugo replies, looking so proud of himself. Boys never grow up, I’m sure of it.

  "Mum's going to kill us," I mutter, though I can’t help but smile at the idea of Michael randomly walking into the posh dining room.

  "True, but that girl Damien has brought back is way too fucking hot for him, and he is acting like a douche canoe," he explains to me. “None of us will be able to put up with him if she sticks around.”

  "I love that word," I laugh, walking around Hugo and heading down the stairs with him slowly following. I walk to the end of the corridor, peeking in the dining room where Damien is sitting with a pretty black haired girl, who is laughing at something my brother said. Damien is unfortunately still covered in teenage spots, his red hair needs washing more often, and he smells like a typical teenage boy that plays too much PlayStation. The girl is his polar opposite with long silky black hair, not a single spot in sight and light makeup on. Hugo has a point, how the effing hell did Damien pull her?

  "I'll cover for you, go!" Hugo, the big kid, says from my back. I step back, and he pushes past me into the dining room, making a load of noise. I walk to the other side of the corridor and pull the backdoor open, stepping out into the garden. I wrap my arms around myself as I walk down the small stone path covered in pretty flowers on either side and get to the fence that separates Michael’s longer stretch of garden that opens into a paddock at the end. I undo the gate, purposely leaving it open for Michael to follow as I walk over to where he is napping next to a big barrow of veg. Michael looks up as I step on a branch, cracking it under my heel and waking him up.

  "K-Karma..." he yawns, slowly stretching out his legs. I’m one hundred percent sure Michael is very intelligent under all that fur and big eyed gaze he does. He knows all our names, though we didn’t teach him them. He walks around the house like a human, and mum even lets him sit on the sofa at times. I’m pretty sure Michael is the only talking goat in the magical world; at least I’ve never heard of talking animals before him. That’s why mum was so shocked, we all were when Michael first talked, telling us he wanted food. Mum screamed and ran out the garden, and dad burst into laughter with us all.

  "Mum wanted me to invite you to our family meal in about ten minutes," I tell Michael, who pulls his lips up so he kind of looks like he is smiling at me.

  "Liar," he replies, but he winks at me. Which is a pretty creepy thing to make me smile, but it does. Winking goats are awesome. I turn around and jog back to the house, leaving the backdoor slightly open before making my way into the dining room. Dad opens the door for me as soon as I get to it, and he grins down at me before ruffling my hair.

  "How is my lovely Karma today?" he asks, holding the door open for me. Dad's black hair has lost its battle to the oncoming grey that has taken over his long locks that are tied at the back of his head. Dad has wrinkles, likely caused from all the stress we gave him over the years, but his eyes are as bright and cheerful as I've always known them to be. Dad somehow makes you feel better no matter what. I can't count how many times I've had my heart broken by some arsehole guy, and dad is there, a hot chocolate in hand and a hug that makes it all better for a little bit. He is the best kind of dad in the entire world.