“…want her there now. I don’t care about blood.”

  Corinne halted by Captain Ekhana in the alcove, met by the king and queen having a quiet exchange. Their heads turned, and the king beckoned to Corinne.

  “I don’t give a damn about bloodstains, and I expect as a warrior you shouldn’t either,” he said. “You can bathe later. Council room, now.”

  Corinne bowed once and followed the king and queen, Captain Ekhana just behind her. The blood on her body and clothing wouldn’t hurt her, but it did turn her stomach to leave it there. She glanced at the sky as she walked down the breezeway; it had started to lighten, dawn fast approaching. Corinne steeled her heart against whatever the day would bring.

  Chapter 35

  “And you’re certain there was no trace of dark magic?” Councilor Dresden asked.

  Corinne had answered the same question about five times now, and exhaustion was sinking into her bones. She craved a moment to heal some of her fatigue, but she couldn’t simply start glowing in front of everyone in the council chamber.

  “I’m certain,” she said. “He was stronger than an average fighter, but he was no Nightrender.”

  “Still, if he held his own against a Lightguard, that is great cause for concern,” Councilor Orvos said.

  “He didn’t hold his own,” Aryel said, his tone as exasperated as Corinne felt. “Corinne killed him in about thirty seconds.”

  He lied so easily about it, and shame washed over her. She would’ve killed him in that time if she hadn’t been caught unawares.

  Still, she may not have gotten to Aryel in time if she hadn’t been next to him in the bed. She held onto that knowledge to keep the guilt at bay while the council continued to question her about every little detail regarding the assassin. Captain Ekhana had not returned to the council room yet after he’d left an hour prior to check on his guards’ investigation of the body.

  “We’ve been at this for hours,” Aryel said, standing and cutting off another question from Councilor Dresden. “I’m taking Corinne to get something to eat.”

  Corinne could have cried with relief. Her stomach had been growling for an hour. Aryel turned to her and nodded, and she stood from her chair. King Theo’s face was murderous as they headed for the exit.

  “Aryel!” he barked, following them into the corridor. “You were not given leave, and neither was she.”

  Aryel stepped around Corinne and stood only a few inches away from his father.

  “You dragged her in here before dawn and have allowed everyone to hound her with questions since,” Aryel said. “She’s still covered in blood after killing a man to protect me. I know this may be difficult to grasp, but she is not your guard, she’s mine, and I won’t have her treated with such indignity.”

  Corinne’s heart jumped into her throat. She’s mine.

  “Tread lightly, boy,” King Theo growled.

  “What are you going to do, Father?” Aryel asked, his voice low and taunting. “Strike me in front of everyone in the corridor? Where the councilors can hear?”

  The king looked ready to implode with rage, his face bright red. Aryel turned on his heel and headed down the hallway, one hand at Corinne’s back to steer her alongside him.

  “That was foolish,” Corinne muttered as they started down the stairwell.

  “Perhaps it was,” Aryel said. “But I don’t care.”

  Corinne couldn’t voice her gratitude in that moment, not when two guards were trailing just behind them, but she hoped Aryel knew what that had meant to her.

  Though she wanted nothing more than a few minutes alone with Aryel without guards tailing them, it was still a relief to venture to the kitchens in relative silence. After thoroughly washing her hands, they sat at the end of a long servants’ table in a room off the main kitchen while Corinne ate a plate of bacon and scones, even more ravenous than she’d realized. Aryel started to say something several times, but stopped himself before voicing it. He folded his hands on the table, and she wondered if it was to keep himself from reaching for hers.

  Not being able to touch him openly was going to be torture, especially if the Lightguards were on their way back. How had one night made her so keen to be in his arms whenever possible? The safety she’d felt had been shattered, but she still craved the comfort of his embrace. Her mind drifted to the scar on her thigh again, the way he’d touched it and kissed it with such tenderness.

  It was no longer possible for her to pretend Aryel hadn’t stolen a piece of her heart. She’d broken that rule entirely and betrayed her oath to Helaera.

  And yet…she did not feel remorse. Caring for someone else didn’t weaken her or pull her away from the Goddess. If anything, caring for Aryel would make her even more devoted to the oath she’d sworn to Helaera, the assignment she’d been given here.

  That’s the only reason he’s kind to you.

  Nausea rolled through her.

  He just wants to keep himself safe. He doesn’t really care about you.

  It was ridiculous to have such a thought after he’d just stood up to his father, blatantly risking his safety for her. But the voice was insistent—it felt so true. She looked at him, accidentally catching his eye, and concern lit his features. Abandoning caution, Aryel placed his hand over hers on the table.

  “Breathe, Sunshine,” he said, his voice so low she barely heard him. “Let thoughts be thoughts.”

  The queasiness eased immediately, and Corinne breathed again. After a moment, Aryel removed his hand smoothly, picking at a splinter in the table.

  “How did you know?” Corinne asked softly.

  “You started to get that look,” he said. “It’s like your light fades a little bit.”

  Corinne’s chest ached with the need to pull him close. Goddess, she wanted to disappear from the world with him, to take a shower and then sleep the rest of the day with him beside her.

  “Corinne Anastos?”

  She and Aryel both looked at the doorway leading into the kitchens, where a servant stood with his hands clasped.

  “Yes?” she said.

  “I’ve been sent to inform you the Lightguards are here. They’re waiting at the entrance hall.”

  Aryel didn’t hesitate to join her as she stood and made her way through the corridors and up the stairs. The two guards Ekhana had assigned them followed, silent but watchful. Corinne tried to force her breathing to even out as they approached the entrance hall, but her heart still picked up speed when they arrived and she spied Mother Creita, Priestess Chala, and four other Lightguards, including Vera. Why did she have to show up every time and bear witness to Corinne’s strife?

  “Corinne,” Mother Creita said, hastening to her. She placed a hand on Corinne’s face, her expression morphing into disgust. “They sent for us hours ago, have you not had a chance to rest and bathe?”

  Corinne shook her head, and anger lit in Mother Creita’s eyes. Behind her and Aryel, more footsteps approached, and the king and queen appeared.

  “What is the meaning of this?” Mother Creita hissed at them, and Corinne blinked at her. “Why has she not been given time to rest?”

  “We have been investigating the attack,” King Theo said gruffly.

  “And you believe interrogating Corinne for hours will result in answers?” Mother Creita demanded.

  Corinne looked between her and King Theo, unsure which of them was more apt to blow up from anger.

  “The Crown and Council will question whomever we deem necessary,” King Theo said. “Perhaps you all can offer an explanation for how this assassin was able to breach our walls in the first place. He got directly into the prince’s rooms.”

  Mother Creita took a deep breath, tension lingering in the silence.

  “My apologies,” she said. “We have come here to aid in your investigation, and if you’ll allow us, we will leave five Lightguards in place while Corinne returns to the monastery. We are recalling one Lightguard from every village, and she needs to share the details of this attacker, and the two previous ones, so we know what to watch out for outside of Vytanos.”

  Corinne wasn’t sure she’d heard correctly. While Corinne returns to the monastery.

  “That seems like a reasonable plan,” Queen Erina cut in before her husband could reply, inclining her head to Mother Creita. “We are still waiting to meet with Captain Ekhana about details regarding this latest assassin.”

  While the king and queen continued speaking with Mother Creita, Corinne turned to Aryel. She broke his gaze quickly when she noticed Vera’s eyes on her. Breathe, Corinne.

  Were they going to reinstate her burn when she arrived? Perhaps not, if they intended to have her speak before dozens of others to relay what she’d seen here.

  “Aryel, come,” Queen Erina said as Mother Creita walked past Corinne again, returning to the other Lightguards. “We will meet with them shortly.”

  Aryel hesitated a moment before following his mother and father toward the entrance hall’s exit. He lightly brushed Corinne’s fingers with his as he passed, the contact so subtle she wondered if she’d imagined it. Corinne gathered herself after he’d disappeared, turning to the Lightguards.

  “…We’ll go, and Chala can help Corinne.”

  The others began to follow the royal family as Corinne approached Mother Creita and Priestess Chala.

  “Mother Creita,” Corinne said, inclining her head.

  “You’ve done well, Corinne,” the High Priestess said.

  “Thank you,” Corinne said, though it meant little. “How long will I be at the monastery?”

  “No longer than a week, I’m certain,” Mother Creita said, placing a hand on Corinne’s face again. “We’ll have a new assignment for you very soon.”

  Corinne blinked at her. “A new assignment?”

  “Yes, of course,” she said. “You have shown your devotion here, and we will need others like you outside Vytanos now that we’ll have five Lightguards in the castle.”

  Corinne tried to speak, to say something, but she couldn’t trust her voice.

  “You don’t look pleased, child,” Mother Creita said, her brow furrowing. “I expected you would be honored.”

  “I am, Mother Creita,” Corinne said quickly. “I just…I wasn’t expecting to leave so soon. I…have become fond of this place.”

  I’ve become fond of Ari and my friends.

  “As many do where they are assigned,” Mother Creita said sagely. “There are far more places for you to grow a fondness for, Corinne.” She looked around for a moment, then stepped even closer, lowering her voice. “There are things we have not yet told you regarding all this, and I see now that was a mistake. But we will, upon your return to the monastery. Do not speak of it to anyone here.”

  Corinne’s heart somehow sank even lower. “Mother Creita, I don’t understand.”

  “I know, but you will soon. Now, go with Chala. You can clean up, and she will help you with your things.”

  “I’m to leave now?” Corinne barely kept her voice from breaking.

  “Yes, child, and make haste. I must go now and meet with the royal family and their Captain of the Guard. Chala?”

  Priestess Chala stepped forward with a soft smile, gesturing for Corinne to lead the way.

  Chapter 36

  Corinne wasn’t sure how long she stood in the shower, her mind racing. The blood had come off easily enough, and now she let the water rush over her until it ran cold, as if it could drown her before the grief would.

  Aryel. Danai. Nik. Iliana. She was leaving them all, and she doubted she’d have the chance to say goodbye. She closed her eyes and cut the water off. She stood on a precipice of despair, and she couldn’t let herself tumble down if she was going to keep a collected exterior in front of Chala. Surely there was some way to convince them to let her stay here.

  Guilt and shame tore at her insides. You’ve strayed and chosen hedonism over devotion.

  Corinne dried off and dressed in a trance, Chala helping her with the armor—it was easier to wear it rather than travel with it for hours. A lump formed in Corinne’s throat when she thought about her arrival weeks ago, and how she would’ve given anything on that day for another assignment.

  Now she would give anything to stay. She felt like her chest would cave in every time she pictured Aryel’s face.

  But what had she been thinking, anyway? Aryel was the prince, and she was his guard. Whatever this was between them might not be heretical in the eyes of Helaera, but it certainly wouldn’t be acceptable to the Lightguards, and the king and queen would surely dismiss it as another of the prince’s fleeting indulgences, if not a sordid scandal. Corinne was not a suitable partner for the heir of Ashera.

  That truth hurt more than she expected it to, nearly knocking her breathless as Chala fastened the ties on her pauldron.

  “There you are,” she said. “The rest of your things are packed and ready. We should head to the stables.”

  To the stables. Corinne fought back tears.

  A knock came at her door, and Corinne walked to answer it with heavy feet. The sight of Danai, Iliana, and Nik on the other side nearly made her knees buckle.

  “Corinne,” Nik said, his face full of empathy.

  Danai wasn’t their usual bright, chipper self, their eyes immediately going behind Corinne, no doubt landing on Priestess Chala.

  Corinne stared at them all. Do not cry.

  “Who is this?” Priestess Chala asked, approaching the door, and Corinne cleared her throat.

  “Danai Mykotas, Iliana Calais, and Nik Ekhana,” Corinne said, forcing a neutral smile to her face. “Danai and Iliana are guards who have partnered with me in my mission here. Nik is Captain Ekhana’s son and a librarian of the highest order.”

  Priestess Chala gave them all a polite smile and nod. “May Helaera bless you all.”

  “We hoped to see Corinne off,” Nik said. The deference in his tone was impressive.

  “Then you have arrived just in time,” Chala said. “I’m afraid she must depart at once. Come, Corinne.”

  The Priestess handed Corinne her bag before stepping past her friends and into the alcove. They waited until she’d just disappeared around the corner onto the breezeway before all three of them threw their arms around Corinne at once. Her armor made it terribly awkward, but she cared little.

  “I don’t know when I’ll see you again,” she whispered.

  Danai squeezed around her ribs. “One day,” they said. “We promise.”

  “Can we write to you?” Nik asked.

  “Of course you can,” Corinne said, her voice strained.

  They released her, and Corinne hastily wiped a tear away, offering them all a sad smile before hurrying after Chala.

  She couldn’t stay. But the ache to do so built behind her ribs as she walked through the corridors behind Priestess Chala. Aryel’s face floated through her mind again, and she thought she might choke.

  She had to find a way to return. Perhaps her new assignment would be a traveling one, and she could make detours in Vytanos like Vera had.

  “Priestess Chala,” Corinne said as they approached a staircase. “Is there not still a threat here? Is it truly wise for me to leave now?”

  “That’s why we have the others staying, dear,” Chala said, taking Corinne’s hand and squeezing it. “You heard Mother Creita—you’re needed at the monastery to help lead others. You’ve overcome many trials here and now Helaera calls you to an even greater purpose. We honor your efforts, Corinne. You’re on the right path to redemption.”

  Corinne swallowed hard, and that ever-present knot in her chest squeezed at her heart. It was everything she’d ever wanted—to be respected and held in high esteem by her people, by her family. What kind of Lightguard was she, to be so fickle that a lifelong aspiration now fell flat as it was laid before her?

  But if they found out about her sleeping with Aryel, it would all crumble at her feet. He wouldn’t tell anyone what they’d done, but could she live with herself amongst the Lightguards, knowing the disdain they would have for her if they knew the truth? She would be right back where she’d started, terrified every moment that someone would discover a shameful secret.

  The sun was high in the sky when she and Chala reached the stables. Corinne stood numbly behind the Priestess as she argued with the stablemaster over a suitable horse for Corinne. One hadn’t yet been prepared and saddled for departure.

  “…Yes, I will show you which is preferred. Goddess, this should have already been communicated. Wait here, Corinne.”

  Corinne managed a nod, deeply apathetic about Chala’s choice of horse. The stablemaster led her down the stables, pointing to several stalls, and Corinne stayed rooted to the spot.

  A low whistle had her turning her head to the right, and Corinne’s heart cracked open. Aryel stood in the doorframe of a storage room filled with grooming supplies. She looked to Chala and the stablemaster, well out of earshot now, and hurried over to him.

  “Ari, what are you doing here?”

  He shut the door behind her and pulled her close. “I had to see you. I paid off the stablemaster to distract her for a few minutes.”

  Corinne huffed a humorless laugh, wrapping her arms around him for a moment.

  “How long will you be gone?” he asked, leaning back.

  “I don’t know,” she whispered.

  Aryel’s brow furrowed, and her heart fractured further. “What do you mean?”

  “They’re giving me another assignment.”

  The shock that played across his face sent knives into her chest. “Why?”

  “They said I excelled in my duty here, and they wish to assign me elsewhere in Ashera.”

  “That makes no sense,” he said, shaking his head. “There’s still a threat here. Why are they making you leave?”

  “They—” Corinne cut off. Do not speak of it to anyone here. She fought the compulsion to obey that command. “They said they have important information to tell me when I return. I have to go.”