Nora turned on her heel and walked briskly away. She kept walking until she was clear of the building and out of sight of prying eyes. She leaned against the back of a partially constructed support building and rested her head against the concrete. What had she done?

  You did what you had to do. You had to be harder on her than on anyone else. Otherwise, you’ll be found out. Even so, she thought she might throw up. I love you, Mary. I’m sorry. You left me no choice.

  She pushed off the building and headed back to her office, where she closed the door. She didn’t want to be disturbed for the rest of the day. She was feeling disturbed enough as it was.

  Mary lay staring at the ceiling in her dorm room. She wasn’t surprised that sleep eluded her, even though she was dead on her feet. Five days—that’s how long it had been since she’d last seen Nora. She hadn’t even caught a glimpse of her at work.

  She closed her eyes tightly as an image of Nora standing in front of her cubicle, disappointment etched in her features, played in her mind. It was cruel to have that be the last memory she had of her. All I did was have a small lapse in concentration. She was cruel, cold, and heartless.

  Mary groaned, as her body replayed a very different memory. This one featured Nora, the expression on her face otherworldly, her mouth forming an “o” as her body shuddered in pleasure. She turned over and buried her head in the pillow.

  Was this how Sam had felt about her? Like he couldn’t breathe without her, like nothing in the world mattered except the next time they could be together? If so, she pitied him. Had she understood better what love was, she would’ve been kinder to him. It wouldn’t have changed the outcome—after all, she wasn’t in love with him—but she would’ve handled the situation more compassionately had she truly understood the nature of unrequited love.

  Unrequited love… That wasn’t what this was. Nora had professed her love the last time they were together. She’d kissed her at midnight. That hadn’t changed this quickly, it couldn’t have.

  She rolled onto her back again. She simply couldn’t go on this way. She had to know; she simply had to see her. She found a piece of stationery and a pen and carefully, painstakingly crafted a note.

  I MUST see you. Please. Meet me under the tree at the Chapel-on-the-Hill after dinner tonight.

  She sat back and reviewed her handiwork. It omitted any personal identifying information. She didn’t sign it, but she was confident Nora would know it was from her.

  She sealed it in a blank envelope. It was 8:23 a.m. Nora would be at work by now. Before she could change her mind, she dressed and hid the envelope in her coat.

  Ten minutes later, after taking a roundabout route to be sure she wasn’t followed and that Nora wasn’t home, she slipped the note under Nora’s front door.

  By the time Nora left work that night, all she wanted was to curl up in a fetal ball and make the world go away. Dr. Lawrence gave them a target of one kilogram of enriched Tubealloy per month. Without Alpha-1, and with construction still underway on several of the other racetracks, she could see no way that they could even come close to hitting that target. According to Jane, barely four percent of the product was ending up in the “enriched” collection box, and even that was enriched only to twelve percent.

  On top of that pressure, she couldn’t stop thinking about Mary. Her body craved her, and her heart missed her. But the incident last week drove home the very point her head had been making all along—everything about this situation screamed trouble. She’s a girl. She’s young, impressionable, and you’re in a position of power. Not only that, what business do you have falling in love with a girl in the first place? Maybe you should give Del a chance? Maybe you could make yourself feel the same way about him that you do about Mary? Even as she thought it, her stomach rebelled. She couldn’t even consider doing the things she’d done with Mary with Del, or any other man for that matter.

  What she needed was time…time to sort out her emotions, time to focus on the job at hand, and time to wrestle her rebellious body under control. She arrived home, pushed open the front door…and slipped on something underfoot. “What the…?” She bent over and retrieved the offending object. A blank envelope? Could she have dropped a piece of mail? As she examined it more closely, a whiff of perfume floated up toward her nostrils. It smelled like Mary.

  Her hands shook as she carefully slit open the envelope. Inside was a note. She read it twice, anger welling inside her, mixed with longing. What time had she left the note?

  Nora set down her attaché case and liberated the weekly schedule from its folder. Her finger traced down the names and corresponding shifts in Beta-2. She stopped when she found what she was seeking. Mary had worked third shift last night. Today, she was off. She could’ve slid the note under her door in broad daylight. Anybody could’ve seen her.

  She checked her watch. She’d left work later than usual, and the bus had been slow tonight. It was almost 8:30. Her heart lurched. What time would Mary have gone to the tree? Would she still be there? She must be freezing. She threw down the schedule, re-buttoned her coat, and ran back out the door.

  The night was pitch-black, and several times she lost her balance and had to recover. The semi-frozen mud squished under her heels and the wind whistled through her ears. As she approached the chapel, she squinted. A solitary figure stood huddled against the tree. Mary. Her breath quickened at the sight, and it was all she could do not to run to her and scoop her up in her arms.

  Then the anger returned. Anger at her foolishness for freezing to death out here. Anger for the possibility of being spotted together, alone, in an isolated spot, at this hour of the night. How would it look? Anger at the thought that someone might have seen her slip the note under her door. Anger at how her heart and body betrayed her at the mere sight of Mary. Anger at the impossibility of all of it.

  “Y-you c-c-came!”

  Nora’s eyes adjusted to the darkness. “Have you lost your mind? It must be below freezing out here.” Nora removed her gloves and handed them to Mary. “Put these on. Honestly, what’s wrong with you?” She shook her head. “How long have you been standing out here?”

  Mary shrugged. “I d-don’t know. Since d-dinner.”

  “You could catch your death of cold.”

  “C-could you please stop y-yelling at me?” Mary glanced away. When she looked back, tears hung on her lashes.

  “I’m sorry.” Nora softened her tone. “It’s too cold for you. You shouldn’t have come.”

  “I d-don’t know any other way to get your attention. I never s-see you anymore. It’s like you’re av-voiding me.”

  “I am avoiding you.” No sense beating around the bush.

  “Why? Why would you do that?”

  “Do you not realize the import of what you did? Tell me that you weren’t daydreaming about us when your unit failed.”

  “Of course I was daydreaming about us! I haven’t been able to think of anything else. I can’t eat. I can’t sleep. All I can think about is you, and us, and all I see when I close my eyes is you, mercilessly berating me in front of everyone.”

  “You made a bad error that cost us material and valuable time. I would’ve done the same to any of the girls who’d made such an egregious mistake.”

  “Would you? I don’t think so. I’ve seen plenty of girls mess up. It’s always been the floor supervisor who pulled them aside and spoke to them quietly. I think… I think you meant to scare me. You meant to make me look bad. You meant to intimidate me.”

  “Not my intent.” Nora crossed her arms defensively. “I meant to give you a stern warning. I hope you got the message.”

  Mary wiped away a tear. “The message I got was that you’re cruel. Why are you being so cold? Didn’t those nights we shared together mean anything to you?”

  “I’m trying to help us both keep our jobs. Can’t you see that? Because right now, we’re standing on the edge of a cliff.”

  “What are you talking about?”

  Nora rounded on her. “Do you remember Harold Thurber?”

  “Who?”

  “Harold Thurber. He was the first-shift floor supervisor in Beta-2. You were on his shift several weeks ago.”

  “You mean the guy who disappeared after a week on the job?”

  “Yes.”

  “What about him?”

  “Do you know why he disappeared?”

  “I assume he wasn’t doing a good job.”

  Nora shook her head. “He was doing a great job. In fact, he was shaping up to be the best floor supervisor we had.”

  “Then, what happened to him?”

  “His boss and the District Engineer—the big boss—determined that he was a sexual deviate.”

  “A…?”

  “Sexual deviate. He preferred other men to women.”

  Mary’s hand flew to her mouth. “They fired him for that? That’s terrible.”

  “That’s us if we don’t pull ourselves together and let go of this madness. I spent all those years in school and endured too much harassment from male classmates so that I could be taken seriously as a scientist. Here, in this place, I’m in a position of authority; I’m in a position to make a real contribution to the war effort. I cannot afford to take a chance on people thinking and talking about me as they did about poor Harold. He’s a fine man, and he’s finished now. I have no idea where, or how, he’ll find work. I’m sure he doesn’t, either. Well, that’s not going to be me.”

  “What about me? What about how I feel and my life?” She jabbed at her chest. “You only care about yourself!”

  “Hardly,” Nora scoffed. “If you lose this job, you’ll probably have to go right back home to your mother—right back where you started from—right back where you don’t want to be. You’ll either have to take a menial job to support yourself, find a way to go to college, or marry what’s-his-name or someone else just like him. Is that what you want?”

  Mary gasped. “Of course not. But you don’t know that any of that is going to happen. You’re scared!”

  “You’re darned right I’m scared. We have to protect ourselves.” They were practically nose-to-nose, both of them breathing hard.

  “What are you suggesting? That we forget about what happened? That we don’t see each other anymore?”

  Nora rubbed the sore spot over her heart. There it was—the only solution that made any sense—except it made no sense to her heart. She cleared her throat as emotion threatened to muffle her words. “Yes.”

  “What did you say?”

  She straightened to her full height. “I said, yes. Yes, I think it would be best if we didn’t spend any time together or see each other, even casually, at least until this business with Harold settles down.”

  Mary slid down the tree and sat at the base. She lowered her head to her knees and rocked herself in mute comfort. “You can’t mean that. You simply can’t.” She raised her head and turned pleading eyes on Nora. “I love you. I refuse to believe you don’t love me back. I know you do. I know you have a heart in there, Nora Lindstrom, and I know it beats for me just as sure as I know mine beats for you.”

  “I wish it could be different; truly, I do. But this is the way of the world. It’s not our time. I wish it was, more than you’ll ever know. I’m sorry.” She smiled sadly down at Mary. “Take good care of yourself.” She pivoted and started down the hill. Tears rolled down her cheeks.

  “You forgot your gloves,” Mary called after her.

  “Keep them.” She didn’t turn around. She couldn’t. “I love you,” she whispered. “God help me, I love you.”

  CHAPTER EIGHTEEN

  The bus ground to a halt and Mary exited. As had become her routine, she headed directly for the dorm. The shift had been uneventful, as so many had been for the past several weeks. She’d done what Nora had told her to do, focusing solely on her work and keeping her head down. She hadn’t seen Nora even once, not a brief glimpse of her in the distance, nor a sighting of her in the cafeteria at lunchtime, nor walking the cubicle room floor. And it was tearing her apart inside.

  Was she okay? Had she decided to date that Berkeley boy who’d been following her around? The idea of that nearly doubled Mary over. No, she couldn’t…she wouldn’t…would she? Mary didn’t think so, but then again, she wouldn’t have thought Nora would disappear completely from her life either.

  “Hey. You’re in your own little world.” Rosalie came up alongside her as they entered the dorm.

  “Sorry. Long day.”

  “Tell me about it. I’ve seen you in the distance a couple of times, but not close enough to shout. Are you okay? You’ve been really scarce.”

  “I-I’m fine, why?” Had Rosalie heard or noticed something?

  “Because you’re starting to remind me and Betty of our ghost-friend, Nora.”

  Mary’s step faltered at the mention of Nora’s name before she caught herself. What did she mean by that? Is Nora all right? She knew she couldn’t ask it out loud, although she badly wanted to.

  “You’ve both lost a lot of weight, you look like heck, and neither one of you has shown up at a dance, or the bowling alley, or even at the movies. They must be working you really hard over there.”

  “Yeah, they are.” Mary smiled in relief. So, Nora hadn’t been out running around with that boy after all. She was moping too. Thank God.

  “Say, why don’t you come dancing with us tomorrow night? Betty’s got her eye on a fella and she wants back-up.”

  “I’d love to, but I can’t. I’ve got to work.” It was only a small white lie. She did have to work tomorrow, just not second shift.

  “Oh, that’s too bad. Well, I guess I’ll see you around.”

  “You bet.” Mary waved as she disappeared down her hallway. Once safely inside her room, she slid down the door to the floor and buried her head in her hands. Oh, Nora. I miss you so much. We have to find a way to be together. We can’t go on like this—at least I can’t. What are we going to do?

  After several moments of feeling sorry for herself, Mary started to formulate a plan. It worked before, she posited, so why wouldn’t it work again?

  It was obvious that Nora was intentionally avoiding Beta-2 whenever Mary was on-shift. Most likely, she was steering clear of the cafeteria in case they should run into each other there, as well. The movie theater probably reminded her too much of their time together. Mary passed on going to the movies for the same reason. Where was the one place almost everybody went on Sunday? The-Chapel-on-the-Hill.

  She nodded. It felt right that she should arrange to intentionally run into Nora just as she had on Christmas Day, although this time she would avoid a direct collision. Just two people who happened to be going and coming from church at the same time and pass each other on the lawn. Yes, that would be her best bet. Surely, Nora couldn’t ignore her then.

  A knock on the door startled her. “Who is it?”

  “It’s the housemother, dear. I know you’ve been waiting for word from your father. I thought you’d want to know right away that you have a letter postmarked from Italy.”

  “I do?” Mary jumped up and flung open the door.

  “Here you are, dear. I’m happy for your sake you’ve heard from him. So many others haven’t been as lucky, you know.”

  “Thank you.” Mary didn’t want to be rude and slam the door in her face, but she was anxious to be alone to read what her father had said. She closed the door and flopped onto the bed.

  January 3, 1944

  My dearest Pumpkin,

  I got word that you are somewhere in Tennessee, working for the war effort. That was a surprise!

  Mary sounded out the letters, taking her time with each word.

  Your mother tells me that you left without saying goodbye and without so much as a word to Sam. That’s my strong-willed, hard-headed girl! I’m not saying that I approve of what you did or how you did it, but I am proud that you followed your heart, that you’re doing something to help us boys over here, and that you’re happy. You are, aren’t you?

  Mary lowered the letter and blinked away a tear. “I was happy, Daddy—deliriously so—but that seems so long ago. What would you make of me and Nora? Would you turn your back on me? Would you cast me out? I know Mother would.”

  Thank you, by the way, for at least breaking down and giving your mother a telephone number and an address so that I could write you a proper letter. I know letters aren’t your strong suit, but I comfort myself that at least it’s a way we can keep in touch. I wish I could call you and hear your voice, but that’s not possible from here.

  Please know how much I love you, Pumpkin. I long for the day when I can gaze upon your pretty face again. I’m sure you’re all grown up by now and I’ll hardly recognize you!

  Love,

  Dad

  P.S. I know you’re like oil and vinegar, but please try to take pity on your mother. Being alone is hard on her.

  P.P.S. I know the mail is much delayed, and I have no idea when this will reach you. We’re in Italy at the moment. I’m sure it would be a beautiful country if we weren’t in the middle of a war zone. I am praying to God to bring me home safely to your mother and to you too, even if you’re in some secret location in Tennessee.

  Mary read and re-read the letter to be sure she understood every word. Her father was safe. He was safe. Well, he was safe as of a month ago. She closed her eyes and said a prayer of thanks.

  Now, if she could only get Nora back, she would truly believe in miracles.

  Sunday dawned cold and clear. Frost covered the lawn leading to The-Chapel-on-the-Hill. Nora wrapped the scarf tighter around her neck. If she attended the first service of the morning, the likelihood of running into Mary was slim.

  Not that it was at all likely that Mary would go to church on a Sunday. She’d been collecting pine cones and surely hadn’t been on her way to or from the chapel when Nora had run into her on Christmas Day. If one didn’t go to church on Christmas, when would one go? Nora shook off the memory of nearly capsizing Mary’s basket and their subsequent date. It seemed like a lifetime ago.