“On it, Cap.”

  “Comms channel open,” Matt announced, having crossed to the station.

  “Nothing to do now but wait,” Ben said.

  The seconds stretched uncomfortably until the channel finally connected, carrying a burst of outraged Gothori in our direction.

  "Well it certainly took you long enough!" Goloran's normally cultured tones seethed with anger and no small amount of panic.

  Ben's shoulders tensed, but he kept his response measured. "Our apologies for the extended silence, your highness." He paused expectantly, but only silence followed. “Are you well?" he added after an awkward beat.

  “Am I well?” she replied with a heavy sigh. “You could have warned me when you planned on moving against Zariv. I nearly got trapped on Cacitrum again. Only four ships made it out after me before they shut everything back down. And when I didn’t hear back within the hour, I thought perhaps you’d chosen to renege on our deal. A few more hours, and I would have summoned the Gothori High Fleet Commander to deploy ships to search for you.” Her voice lowered to a sharp hiss. “On a seek and destroy mission, Captain.”

  “Again, our apologies,” Ben answered, jaw tight. “We couldn’t risk our comm lines being compromised. And we needed time to regroup after our escape.”

  "We would never ghost you like that intentionally," Matt added, a bit of bite to his words. “That’s not who we are. But we only narrowly punched out ahead of a whole fleet ourselves."

  "Yes, yes, I gathered that when half the sector began issuing bulletins for your immediate capture," Goloran replied impatiently.

  I swallowed hard at the reminder of just how desperately Cacitrum’s authorities wanted us brought in for questioning over Levain’s death. That desire would only intensify once they connected us directly to Zariv’s demise.

  "The good news is we succeeded in acquiring the information Nyree promised us,” Ben added smoothly. “In that sense, you got exactly what you paid for.”

  “And what’s the bad news, Captain?” Goloran asked.

  “Nyree didn’t make it,” I said. “Neither did one of our hires. Tarvik.”

  “But you did,” she replied. “And that’s what matters.” I cringed silently at the coldness of her reply, which she quickly followed up. “Send me the location, so I can coordinate with my resources to get the equipment we discussed en route to you.”

  "I'm relaying our location and what we believe to be the space station's coordinates now," Ben said.

  “Umm.” Goloran’s response indicated she was considering the coordinates Ben had sent her. “I’m sure it’s safe to assume these aren’t the precise coordinates,” she remarked after a lengthy pause. “I presume the actual site lies somewhere within this general volume of information?" Amusement colored her voice. Clearly, our thinly-veiled precaution hadn’t escaped her notice.

  "A reasonable bit of insurance,” Ben said. “I’m sure you understand, your highness.”

  "Naturally. I would expect no less from you." Goloran’s amusement remained firmly intact. "Stand by while I discuss arrangements to deliver the recording equipment to an appropriate rendezvous point.”

  The channel clicked to standby mode while we awaited further details from our temporary benefactor. I drummed my fingers on my armrest, waiting impatiently to get the show back on the road. I took the opportunity to break the silence on the one question lurking just beneath the surface of my thoughts and Matt’s especially.

  “How are you holding up, Ben?” I looked back over my shoulder at him. “You doing okay? Your cancer, I mean,” I asked, the question coming out more awkwardly than I intended. “Is it still under control?”

  Ben hesitated before offering me a faint smile that didn’t quite reach his eyes. He was probably trying to decide how honest he wanted his answer to be.

  “It’s…” He paused again and shook his head. “Not great. I never realized how much chaos energy I needed to continually restore myself. I got so used to sucking on the straw, it became second nature. I can’t get enough here to stop the growth completely. I can slow it, but even that’s a challenge with everything else I’ve needed to expend my energy on. The tumor is growing again. By the time we reach the Wardenship, it’ll probably have started spreading to other areas of my body.”

  “Maybe they have treatments for cancer here,” I suggested. “Don’t they have any in the Spiral?”

  “Not the kind that can help me,” Ben answered.

  “We should never have scaled down,” Matt said, disturbed by Ben’s admission. “We could have tried to go through the blockade. Noah made it out. I should have been able to make it, too.”

  “No,” Ben countered. “Noah had the element of surprise, plus he didn’t have Levain’s personal assets chasing him. He did a great job, but the challenge wasn’t the same.”

  “I agree,” I said.

  “In any case, it wouldn’t change the final outcome. I can’t draw enough chaos energy here to heal myself completely.”

  “How long do you think you have?” Matt asked.

  “Three months,” Ben guessed. “Maybe longer if I stop using it for anything other than restoring myself. But I don’t see that happening.”

  “It has to happen,” Matt said.

  “I can’t imagine being here three more months,” I said.

  “I thought you wanted to stay?” Ben questioned.

  “At first, I did. But I want Tee and Ally to get back to their families. And now I want Ben to be able to fix himself.”

  “Me, too,” Matt agreed.

  Before we could continue the conversation, the comm link re-engaged, and Princess Goloran's melodic voice burst from the flight deck speakers.

  "My assets have arranged the purchase and delivery of remote viewing equipment to a resupply outpost along your path. I’ve already dispatched technicians to the station who can outfit your vessel for transmission.”

  “Your techs aren’t robots, are they?” I asked.

  “Of course not,” she replied, voice tinged with amusement. “After what happened on Cacitrum, I intend to cancel my contacts with whoever fills the void you left behind there and seek organic help in alternate systems. The costs will be higher, but not higher than the apparent risk. As I was saying, once the new comms installation is complete, I will remain on standby at the coordinates you provided while you investigate the Wardenship. Try not to get yourselves killed before I can learn anything.” Her facetious tone made the warning sound like a joke, but I knew she meant every word.

  Ben responded much more seriously on our behalf. "Understood, your highness. We'll do our best to keep breathing.”

  “I’m transmitting the coordinates now,” Goloran said. “I expect to hear from you when you arrive.”

  “Of course,” Ben replied. “Thank you, your highness.”

  Goloran transmitted coordinates to the resupply post before closing the channel, leaving us staring expectantly at one another. This was really happening. Dazed excitement pushed my concerns for Ben's condition aside, at least temporarily.

  “One step closer to going home,” Ben said with a grin. “Noah, do you know how to add a waypoint to the nav calculations?”

  My excitement retreated almost as quickly as it advanced. “Uh. No. Sorry.”

  “It’s fine,” Matt said. “I can show you. Levi, bring up the new coordinates on the starmap.”

  The new point appeared, marked in yellow. It was already part of the map, not some super-secret hideout or anything. A place called Asterock.

  “Cool name,” Matt remarked, glancing back at Ben. “If we ever start another band…”

  “It totally is,” I agreed.

  He moved to stand behind the pilot’s station, guiding me through the interface to add Asterock on our travel path between here and Levain’s station. It was almost midway, meaning two weeks in hyperspace before we would arrive. I still hated the distance, but at least we were headed toward something.

  “Nav set and ready, Captain,” I announced once the calculations were completed. “Hyperdrive is online.”

  ”Then let’s ride.”

  CHAPTER 33

  After setting our course, I returned to the lounge with Matt and Ben, hoping the others would still be there so we could share the good news about our next destination. But when we entered, the room sat empty, the popcorn boxes and glasses cleared and fed back into Asshole to be broken down and recycled.

  "I guess everyone went back to bed or something,” Matt remarked, clearly as disappointed as I was not to have an audience for our update.

  My gaze drifted over the vacated seats, coming to rest on the stairs leading off toward our crew quarters. Specifically, I was thinking of the one Ally shared with Meg. I hadn’t gotten a chance to speak to her since before we tried to rescue Nyree. Hopefully, she was doing alright and not alone somewhere, still beating herself up for shooting Zariv.

  "If no one has any objections, I'm headed back to bed, too,” Ben said, drawing my attention back to my companions. “I need to conserve energy right now.”

  Matt clapped him supportively on the back. "Go get some rest, buddy. Doctor's orders. I’m heading back to my quarters, too. I have a Reacher novel to finish.” He grimaced, flexing the fingers of his injured arm. “Depending on how long I can hold up the book.”

  “Do you think you’ll be ready to go when we get to Levain’s station?” I asked.

  “I’d better be,” he replied.

  I bid them both good night before watching them shuffle up the steps, talking quietly to each other. I lingered in the lounge for a minute, trying to decide what to do next. The four hours I had slept definitely wasn’t enough. At the same time, my concern for Ally wouldn't let me seek bed just yet. Exiting the lounge, I headed up to the crew quarters, turning to the door on the left instead of right to the room I shared with Tyler. At worst, she was already asleep. But at least then I would know she was alright.

  I knocked softly, more to avoid potential notice from Tee in our room than anything. Not that I had anything to hide, but his upbeat attitude wasn’t conducive to Ally’s state of mind. It was best he just didn’t get involved with her. After a lengthy pause with no response, I knocked again, harder this time. Still nothing. Maybe she had already gone to sleep. But something told me that probably wasn't the case.

  "Ally?" I called softly. "It's Noah. I just wanted to see how you're holding up."

  Another silence ensued before the lock disengaged. The door opened, revealing the room's interior darkened save for the soft glow of a bedside lamp. Ally sat with her back against the headboard, knees drawn to her chest beneath a colorful patchwork quilt that matched the room’s relatively fresh paint job. Her haunted gaze remained locked on the far wall, lost in thought. Unsurprisingly, there was no sign of Meg. She had probably gone to check on diagnostics or to fix the shield nodes damaged during our escape.

  Seeing Ally so miserable squeezed my chest painfully. “Hey Red,” I offered gently. “Can I come in?” Her haunting glance shifted my way, and she nodded almost imperceptibly. Crossing the threshold, the door closed behind me, and I crossed the room, lowering myself to the bed beside her. "Rough day, huh?"

  “You and Tee make a great pair,” she replied. “He’s the fool of exaggeration, and you’re the king of understatement.”

  I smiled at the comparison. “Yeah, I guess that’s true. Which approach do you like better?”

  “Neither.”

  My smile faded. She clearly wasn’t in the mood for humor right now. "I'm sorry you got dragged into this insanity. I’m sorry Tee and I ever showed up at VR Awesome. I should have been the one to pull the trigger on Zariv.”

  She shook her head. “You couldn’t have hit him. I’m the only one who could, thanks to the Warden.”

  "I meant what I said earlier," I told her softly. "You saved our lives by doing what needed to be done. I know it wasn’t easy, and I can’t imagine what you’re feeling right now. But I hope you can make peace with that."

  "I know. Logically anyway. I just...I never realized how hard it would be to take a life, even when it's justified. When Zariv's eyes went dark it was like someone stabbed me in the heart with an icicle. At the same time, I don’t regret it. At all. I think that’s the hardest thing to reconcile. I’m not sorry I killed him. But I am sorry I’m not sorry, if that makes any sense.”

  “It does. And I think it’s a normal reaction. You had the courage to do what needed to be done. You have the compassion to care about the result, and I believe you have the strength to carry on. You’ll get through this. And when my time comes to pull the trigger, and it probably will, I’ll get through it, too.”

  Ally managed a small, trembling smile and another sharp nod. We sat without speaking for several minutes, watching a simulated night sky through Meg’s faux viewport. Her posture slowly relaxed until she seemed much more at peace than when I had entered. I gave her shoulder a squeeze before standing. “I don’t want to overstay my welcome. But I want you to know that you can come to me at any time if you need anything, even if it’s just to talk, okay?"

  She didn’t need to force her smile this time. "I will Noah. And thank you for checking on me. I really appreciate it."

  “By the way,” I added. “We’re on course for an outpost Princess Goloran directed us to so her techs can install advanced equipment on Head Case, and then on to Levain’s station. It’s not a short trip.”

  “I didn’t expect it would be,” she replied. “How long?”

  “Four weeks.”

  Her face fell. I didn’t expect her to be happy with the timeline, but we both knew there was nothing we could do about it. “Then I hope it pays off.”

  “Yeah, me too,” I said. “I intend to resume training tomorrow. I hope you’ll be there.”

  “Why wouldn’t I? I may not need to practice my marksmanship skills anymore, but my hand-to-hand is still crap.”

  I smirked in jest. “That’s because you punch like a girl.”

  That one got a laugh out of her. “I’ll show you who punches like a girl tomorrow, Noah-san.”

  “We’ll see. You haven’t landed one on me yet.”

  “Yet being the operative word.”

  I clasped her shoulder and returned her smile, happy to see her emerging from her funk. “I’ll see you there, if not before.”

  “You bet.”

  I left her room and crossed to mine, entering to find Tyler had wandered elsewhere. My eyes fell on my rumpled bed, my smile widening when I spotted some of Archie's gelatinous mass sticking out from beneath the blankets. I crossed to the bed, gently shifting the covers back. Archie wiggled several inquisitive tendrils at me, its body quivering in what I hoped was a pleased greeting. The alien blob had definitely gotten larger after its most recent meal, nearly doubling its prior size. It was almost as big now as the rat bundles Ixy delivered to feed it.

  Its longer, thicker appendages stretched toward me. "Hey there little guy. Making yourself at home I see.” I pointed to the blankets in the corner next to the desk. “Your bed is over there. I don’t want to accidentally…” I trailed off. It wasn’t like I could squish him. “Never mind.”

  I offered a palm for it to climb aboard. Archie swarmed eagerly over my wrist, tendrils waving before it went still atop my forearm. I got the distinct sense it was studying me, noting lingering concern from my talk with Ally.

  "We're on our way to the Wardenship. It's going to be a long trip though. Two weeks between here and our first stop, and two more to our final destination.”

  Archie’s tendrils waved inquisitively. I took it as a cue to keep talking.

  "We're getting closer to answers at least. That's something." Unthinking, I gently stroked the Aleal's back. Oddly, the touch soothed away some of my frustration, and Archie didn’t seem to mind that I was treating it more like a cat than an intelligent life form.

  Whatever the reason, I soon found myself quietly opening up about things I hadn't fully admitted, even to myself. Like how much I missed my parents, and despite all of my new friends, how lonely the universe still felt without them. “I’m sorry you’ll never get a chance to meet them. They would have been amazed by you. Mom would have tried to feed you all kinds of things you don’t eat, and Dad would probably have wanted to see if you could catch a frisbee or something.” I smiled at the thought. “Although, you might like sushi. It’s raw fish.”

  Archie shivered in my lap in laughter, hunger, or both. I wasn’t sure.

  "Thanks for listening, bud.” I smoothed both hands over its quivering gel. "Anyway, enough wallowing. I thought I might get some sleep, but I’m feeling kind of restless. I think I’ll head down to the gym.” Archie shifted away from me to let me stand. When I headed for the door, it followed behind me. I stopped and looked down at it. “You want to get some reps in too?”

  It waved a few tendrils in amusement, sticking with me as I left the room and headed back toward the lounge on our way to the elevator. We were passing the galley when I noticed Tee opening Asshole’s delivery hatch to retrieve a huge plate of nachos.

  “Geez, didn’t you already have two buckets of popcorn?” I asked.

  "Oh, hey Noah-san! You're just in time for a post-movie snack. Want some?" He lifted the heavily laden plate loaded with taco meat, cheddar, and queso.

  Admittedly, it made my mouth water, but I rolled my eyes in mock disgust as he crammed the first big bite into his mouth. "Do you ever stop eating?"

  "Not if I can help it," he mumbled around the mouthful. Swallowing in one big gulp, he flexed the bicep of his idle arm. “I need a lot of calories to feed these pythons. So what's up? Not tired?”

  “Not as tired as I expected. Too much on my mind I guess. I was headed for the gym.”

  Tee sat down at the table with his nachos. “Just give me a few minutes to chow down on this and I’ll be right there with you.” He picked up another loaded chip and held it out to me. “Want one?”