She had to find a way to make him understand. Her actions had nothing to do with Lucian and everything to do with the men who’d held her brother. “I didn’t trust Prince and his men. I couldn’t bear it if anything happened to you or Chase. I thought if I was there I could help you in some way.” She watched his face, searching for any reaction at all, even a flicker that he understood and could forgive her for interfering. “I couldn’t let you face them alone.”

  The reaction she got almost made her wish that his cool mask was back in place. Fury radiated from every pore of his body. Every muscle in his body tensed, his hands clenched into fists as he pulled away from her, his eyes blazed pure fire, and his lips curved up into a cruel smile. His fangs gleamed a pearly white in the faint light as he gave a bark of laughter.

  “Do you have any idea what you have done?” His words fell on her like hot coals. There was no mistaking she had angered him, and she didn’t think he would get over it any time soon.

  An icy cloak enveloped Delight from the inside out. She welcomed the numbness, as it helped block out the pain of his withdrawal from her. Her actions seemed to be unforgivable to him. So be it. She couldn’t take them back and wouldn’t, in any case. She’d done what she’d thought best to protect both the men in her life, but the fact remained that she could no longer stay here.

  Home. She needed to go home, where she could be alone and nurse her injured brother as well as her broken heart. Right now, she didn’t know how she’d survive it, but she would.

  Turning away from Lucian was the hardest thing she’d ever done in her life. Delight shoved back the covers and edged to the side of the bed. She took a deep, settling breath and stood. Her legs were shaky but they held.

  “Where in the hell do you think you’re going?”

  Delight could no longer feel his anger. In fact, she could feel nothing. She was totally detached, as if she were watching a conversation unfold rather than being a part of it. It was as if she no longer inhabited her own body.

  Not bothering to look back, she began to make her way toward the door. It really wasn’t far from the bed, but the way she felt physically, mentally, and emotionally, it looked as if it was miles away. Each step was excruciating as it took her further away from Lucian. Ripping out her own heart would hurt less.

  “Delight?” His guttural tone stopped her in her tracks, but she didn’t turn to face him. She just didn’t have the strength. It was easier just to let him have his say and then leave.

  Swaying on her feet, she waited. Time had no meaning and she waited with a detached patience.

  “Don’t leave me.”

  She frowned and felt the first crack in the ice that surrounded her. That couldn’t happen. She needed it to protect her, but the pain in his voice was more than she could bear.

  “I had no choice. You left me none.” His voice was angry now, almost accusing.

  Knowing she shouldn’t, she slowly turned around and faced Lucian. He had moved silently from the side of the bed and stood right behind her. Startled, she took an involuntary step backward, away from him.

  He flinched as if she had struck him. Delight was confused and off-kilter. She felt as though she was missing an important piece of the puzzle. “I don’t understand what you want. Obviously, you find my actions unforgivable, so I’m leaving.” She rubbed the pain in her temples, wishing it would go away. “I thought that’s what you wanted.”

  “Oh, Delight. What have I done to you?” Falling to his knees in front of her, Lucian hung his head. “It is not you who has done the unforgivable. Do you remember nothing?”

  Delight sorted through the images in her head one by one. They moved faster and faster, suddenly clicking into place. “I got shot.” She looked down at herself, only then realizing she was clad in one of Lucian’s soft linen shirts. Plucking the fabric away, she searched her naked flesh beneath, but could find nothing but a pale white scar. “How can this be?” She remembered the shock of the impact of the bullet, the pain that followed, and the sensation of her blood pumping from her body. Now there was no sign of the trauma beyond a single scar that looked like it was years old.

  “You were dying.” Lucian met her bewildered gaze with a defiant one. “I did what I had to do.”

  “You took my blood.” Everything was becoming clearer. “And gave me yours.” She remembered sucking at his wrist and swallowing his blood. It should have been repugnant and appalling to her, but it hadn’t been. His blood had tasted better than the finest wine, warming her, feeding her hunger. She’d wanted to keep on drinking from him forever, never letting him go.

  “Yes.” He made no move toward her, but she could feel him willing her to come to him.

  “Am I like you now?” She couldn’t quite bring herself to say the word.

  “Vampire?” Lucian had obviously read her thoughts and had no trouble spelling it out in black and white for her. “Yes.”

  Wow. Not what she’d been expecting. Not at all. She had no idea what this meant for her or her life. She really needed time to think about this new development but it would have to wait. Right now she wasn’t feeling very well. The pounding in her head had gotten louder and harder and her stomach was churning like the sea on a stormy day. But Lucian wasn’t finished.

  “I understand if you cannot forgive me for what I have done. But know that whatever you choose, I will honor your wishes.”

  “What choice? I don’t understand.” It was becoming increasingly difficult to follow his train of thought. She was getting sicker and sicker by the second. She swallowed and almost gagged. She did not want to throw up in front of him. Sweat broke out on her forehead.

  “You can live alone and I will support you for eternity. You can choose to embrace death and I will gladly die with you. Or—” He paused for a moment. “You can choose to stay with me, knowing I will love you for all time. No man living or yet to be born will love you as I will. Your happiness and protection will be my life’s work and my life’s joy.”

  The familiarity of his words shook her. “You’ve said this to me before.”

  “When I changed you.” He looked so breathtakingly handsome kneeling in front of her, so stoic and remote.

  Delight didn’t quite know what to say or do. She wanted to reassure Lucian that everything would be fine, but her stomach chose that moment to totally rebel. Delight covered her mouth and turned from his penetrating gaze. She needed to find a bathroom.

  The howl of pain shook the room and brought her to her knees. At first, she thought it must be from her. The pain inside her was growing like a living beast, devouring everything in its path. She sprawled on the floor and rolled to her side, watching in shock as Lucian howled in anguish again. His head was tipped back and he looked like a man consumed with pain.

  What was wrong with him? Did he have some injury she couldn’t see?

  The need to comfort him overwhelmed the urge to vomit and the vicious pain slashing through her. She swallowed down the bile in her throat and started to crawl toward him. The pain made it almost impossible, but she pulled herself along the floor, inch by inch.

  As if he sensed her movement, his head swung toward her. She reached her hand out to him, but it fell to the floor. Silently, she pleaded for his help, as speech was beyond her capabilities.

  Lucian moved so fast that he was a blur. He scooped her into his arms and carried her to the bathroom just in time. As he held her head over the toilet, she was violently ill.

  It was horrible. And it wasn’t only once. As soon as she thought she was finished, her stomach would rebel again. Over and over, she emptied her stomach until she swore there was nothing left in her body. Through it all, Lucian held her and soothed her with comforting words. When she was finished, he flushed the toilet and carefully laid her on the floor.

  If she wasn’t so sick and miserable she’d be totally embarrassed. As it was she was too sick to care.

  The tile was cool and felt good against her flushed cheek. She sighed when she heard the sound of running water. She was sweaty and sticky and longed for a nice warm bath. The smell of lavender filled the air, relaxing her and making her feel calmer. She decided that she’d move in a minute, but right now she was content to just lie here on the floor. It was such a relief to be still after being so violently ill. She was more exhausted than she’d ever been.

  Lucian’s strong arms wrapped around her and plucked her from the floor. She bit back a moan. Even her skin was tender to the touch. She felt like one big bruise.

  “Do you want to brush your teeth?” he asked.

  “God, yes.” She’d kill for a toothbrush. The inside of her mouth tasted like a sweat sock that had been inside a gym bag for a month. Not that she’d ever tasted one, but she had a good imagination.

  Lucian set her up with a toothbrush. He even put the minty paste on it for her. She brushed and spit in the sink. When she was done, she took the glass of water he offered her and rinsed again before swallowing the tiniest amount.

  “Bath next.” He began to remove her shirt. It was stuck to her skin and smelled none to fresh. Lucian stripped it off and tossed it aside before lowering her into the warm bath. It wasn’t too cold or too hot. It was perfect. A huge sigh of relief escaped her.

  “It will get better now,” he promised. He dragged a washcloth over her arms and torso, cleaning her thoroughly.

  “I don’t know what’s wrong with me.” She’d meant to sound strong and sure but instead sounded weak and shaky. What was happening to her?

  Lucian’s lips tightened, but he kept washing her. “It is part of the change as your body is purging itself of your human wastes.”

  Shivers began to rack her body, causing the water in the tub to splash perilously close to the edge. She shook so hard her teeth began to chatter. She hoped he was right about it getting better soon. This was no fun. She’d never been so sick in her life, not even when she’d spent three days in bed with the flu had she felt this bad.

  Lucian pulled her out of the tub and quickly dried her with a huge fluffy towel. He was tender and thorough. When he was done, he carried her back into the bedroom and tucked her naked under the covers.

  She thought he might leave her then, but he yanked off his clothes and crawled in beside her. His heat surrounded her and she snuggled closer to his chest, nuzzling the crisp hair there. She couldn’t seem to stop shaking and that worried her. “Is this part of changing?” she managed to get out between her chattering teeth.

  “Yes.” He ran his arms up and down her back and over her shoulders, warming her and comforting her. “You will feel better when you awake tomorrow evening. Then you can make your decision.”

  Fatigue was dragging her down. She needed to sleep but there was something she needed to know before she gave herself up to its healing power. “Chase?”

  He placed a gentle kiss on her forehead. “Both Chase and Miss Nadine are well and safe. I promise I’ll take care of them.”

  Delight sighed in relief, but she still had one final thing to do before she succumbed to sleep. “You.”

  “Me what?” He leaned down so his ear was near her lips. “What do you want, Delight? I’ll do anything for you. Give you anything. All you have to do is ask.”

  “Choose you. Not leaving.” Totally exhausted now, she slumped against his chest. Lucian stiffened beneath her, but her body was crying out for rest, so she gave into it.

  “Delight?”

  She managed to whisper two final words as her world went dark. “Love you.” Her body drifted into a state that was deeper than sleep and more like death. Her heart all but ceased to beat and her body went lax. She didn’t feel the lone tear that drifted down Lucian’s cheek and onto hers.

  Chapter Eighteen

  The first thing Delight noticed when she next awoke was that she felt surprisingly good for someone who had been shot and spent part of the previous evening throwing her guts up. There was no more pounding in her head and her stomach was remarkably calm.

  Lying in Lucian’s large bed, she took stock of her entire body. She wiggled her fingers and toes and flexed her limbs, pleased to note that everything seemed to be in working order. Not only did she not feel any pain, she actually felt energized.

  A low pounding sound reached her ears. It was coming from outside of her and wasn’t a result of a headache. She cocked her head to one side and listened intently, trying to figure out where it originated.

  A blast of noise struck her with such force she actually flung her head back to try and avoid it. She slapped her hands over her ears to try to shut out the racket assaulting her poor eardrums. What was going on?

  “Imagine a switch in your mind. Picture it like you would a knob on a radio or a button on your iPod and turn down the volume.” She didn’t know how she heard Lucian over the din, but she focused all her attention on following his instructions. It took her some time to build a realistic picture in her head. The jumble of noises made it difficult to concentrate.

  She pictured her iPod; it was purple and fit in her pocket when she was housecleaning or walking. She imagined herself pressing the button and watching the volume level lowering on the screen. Surprisingly enough, it worked and the jumble of sounds became a low hum in the background.

  Delight cautiously removed her hands from her ears. When the noise remained muted, she smiled up at Lucian, who had propped himself up on one arm in the bed and was leaning over her with a frown on his face. “Thanks for the tip, but what was that all about?”

  He brushed back a lock of hair from her face with his fingers. “You will find that things are different now that you have changed. All your senses are sharper, but you can easily learn how to control them.”

  She nodded her understanding. “What else?” She needed information. Her life had irrevocably changed in ways she couldn’t begin to imagine. The idea of living forever, or at least a very long time, was more than her mind could comprehend. What about Chase and Miss Nadine? What would it be like to watch them age and die while she remained young?

  She wasn’t ready to deal with the big picture yet. Better to focus on the practical aspects of the situation.

  “As I told you before, you need blood to survive. But we’re civilized now and no longer need to drink from humans, unless we choose to or our survival demands it. We purchase blood through many sources and always have a large supply on hand.” Lucian watched her like a hawk, gauging her every reaction. “You can easily drink wine or water and after a time you’ll be able to tolerate small amounts of food if you choose, but it is no longer necessary for you to eat to live.”

  She licked her lips, wondering how she felt about these things. She’d miss food, but if she could occasionally enjoy her favorite ones, maybe it wouldn’t be so bad. It was the whole blood drinking that gave her pause, but she’d done it before or she wouldn’t be in this predicament. Maybe it wouldn’t be so bad if she drank it from a glass.

  But it wouldn’t be nearly as tasty as sipping from Lucian. She shivered and he tugged the covers more snugly around her.

  “Once your body has had time to adjust,” he continued, “you may be able to enjoy the early morning or late afternoon. Every vampire is different in that regard, but I’m afraid sunlight is now lost to you forever.” Lucian brushed his lips over hers. “For that, I am truly sorry.”

  She nodded, sensing he was holding something else back from her. “What else? Tell me the rest.”

  “With time and practice, you may be able to shapeshift. Not all Dalakis brides are able to do so, as their minds cannot accept the possibility and they block their natural ability to change.”

  Was he joking with her? From the serious expression on his face, he was deadly serious. Shapeshifting? She supposed it made as much sense as being a vampire.

  “Into what?”

  “The wolf is the most common, although my elder brother, Cristofor, can shift into an owl as well.” Lucian paused as if searching for the right words to explain it to her. “You let your mind go and think of the wolf and you become the wolf. It is very freeing to roam the woods at night in that form. I admit that I do not do it much here in New Orleans, but when I return home to the Carpathian Mountains, I cannot resist.”

  This was like something out of a novel. She couldn’t believe she was lying here calmly discussing the fact that the man she loved could change into a wolf. But she figured if she could accept that he was a vampire and that she was one too, then she certainly wasn’t going to let a little matter of shapeshifting bother her. The more she thought about it, the more she was intrigued by the idea, even if she wasn’t sure she’d ever be ready to try it.

  Her mind was whirling at the thought of being able to do such a thing. It was almost too much to handle on top of everything else. She’d have to figure out a way to deal with all the changes in her life. Baby steps, like turning down the volume on the world, which had suddenly gotten a lot louder.

  All that truly mattered was that she and Lucian were together. Well, that was almost all that mattered. “I won’t sleep in a coffin or underground.” Delight drew her line in the sand there. Wasn’t happening. No how, no way. Just the thought made her shudder in horror.

  Lucian threw back his head and his laughter echoed throughout the bedroom. Delight hadn’t thought her demand funny at all. In fact, she was quite adamant about it. She opened her mouth to scold Lucian but got sidetracked by the strong column of his neck.

  Her nipples tightened and she felt the familiar flood of liquid between her thighs, a common occurrence whenever she was with Lucian. Now that she was no longer totally focused on her new reality, she was noticing other things. Like the fact they were both totally naked and lying in a nice big bed.

  Lucian’s shaft twitched and grew as she snuggled closer to his side. A pulsing began deep inside her that radiated outward until she felt as if her entire body was vibrating with need. Her teeth ached and she was filled with a longing to lick and suck his neck. Lucian was right about all her senses being sharper. Her skin felt totally sensitized and alive. Unlike last night, it didn’t hurt. It was more a tingling sensation. Quite pleasant.