Like any artist, she was happy to have her work recognized. “Oh, good. I’ve got some really cool sparklers that will shoot red and orange sparks into the air. I figured a twelve-year-old boy is going to want something spectacular.” She glanced up to find him still admiring the cake, and for a second she could imagine what Ron must have looked like as a twelve-year-old. “Thank you for the book.”

  “You’re welcome. Have you read it?”

  “No. I saw the movie once. During a Hitchcock phase I was going through.”

  He seemed pleased that she hadn’t already read it. “It’s a classic early spy thriller. You’ll have to let me know what you think.”

  “I will.” She continued piping red gel onto the rim of the eye.

  “Maybe we could have coffee sometime?”

  Her hand spasmed and splat: a great squirt of red spat out of her bag so the eye now had a huge red jujube of a tear hanging from it. “Oh, crap,” she cried, grabbing a spatula and easing off the mess she’d made.

  “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to startle you. Of course we don’t have to have coffee. I thought you might like to discuss the book.” He seemed as nervous and flustered as she felt.

  She had no idea how to respond. She didn’t even know what he was asking her. Was it for a date? Which is what she’d first assumed, but now she wondered if perhaps he hadn’t meant anything more than a friendly coffee.

  But what if she said yes, and it was a date, and then Karen might be upset and she loved her job here and didn’t want to cause any trouble to a woman she liked enormously.

  On the other hand, maybe it wasn’t a date at all and she’d sound all stuck up and full of herself if she refused.

  Which was why she pretty much stayed away from the whole male/female personal interaction thing. It was all simply too confusing, like a game whose rules she’d never grasp.

  She’d attempted to play chess a few times and felt absolutely bewildered. When was a playing piece allowed to go sideways and which ones could only go forward, she’d never quite understood. And as for that horse thing that went over and up, it was enough to drive a creative brain crazy.

  Silence seemed to echo around the kitchen. It had never seemed so huge, or so empty. “Of course I’d like to discuss the book sometime,” she finally managed to say, keeping her attention on the icing, but not daring to continue her task in case he said something that made her completely ruin her cake.

  “You don’t drink coffee?” he asked seeming a little puzzled.

  “I love coffee,” she snapped. One of them was being incredibly dense and she had a horrible feeling it was her.

  “But you don’t want to go out with me?” he finally asked with a kind of humble tone that made her glance up from the cake and meet his gaze.

  “No. I would like to go out with you.” She sighed. How could a woman spend so much time strengthening her core and believing in the essential oneness of all people and still be such a weenie? She decided to speak her truth. “But you’re seeing Karen. At least that’s what Chelsea said.”

  The second the words were out she regretted them. She didn’t want Ron to think she’d been asking about him. How embarrassing.

  He didn’t make the obvious conclusion, but a puzzled frown settled on his face. “Karen’s a wonderful person,” he began. “But I don’t think you could say we’re seeing each other. Not romantically. We both realized that we’d rather work together than,” he gestured helplessly, “you know.”

  “Oh.”

  “So, will you?”

  The world made sense again. Speaking her truth was as wonderful as all the yogis in the world told her it was. “Go for coffee with you?”

  “Yes.”

  “I hardly ever date,” she admitted in a rush. “I’m not very good at it.”

  He breathed what seemed to her to be a sigh of relief. “Me neither. I am so happy we both like books. At least we’ll have something to talk about.”

  She turned to him, not even realizing she still held the spatula. The connection she’d felt the first time she saw him was only strengthened by his words and she felt a rush of understanding. “I know exactly what you mean. Isn’t that the worst part? Sitting there, racking your brain for something to say? And my mind always goes blank when I start to panic. I’ll blurt out something ridiculous.” He smiled at her and she suddenly recalled her brilliant conversational repartee of yesterday when she’d told a man she’d never met before that he could be a spy because he looked so innocuous. She supposed she didn’t need to tell him another word about her little problem with blurting out the strangest things.

  “Have you ever tried online dating?”

  “No. I’d never have the courage.” Her eyes widened in awe. “Have you?”

  “Yes. I decided that mathematically it made sense to widen the scope of potential females as far as possible since I only meet a very narrow selection of women in my daily life.”

  “Impressive logic. How did it work?”

  “Well, let’s see, over the last four months I’ve gone on approximately twenty-five first dates.”

  “Twenty-five first dates?” Her eyes widened.

  “Mmm-hmm. A few of them progressed to second dates, but nothing felt quite right.”

  “I don’t know how you had the guts to keep going.”

  “I’m tenacious that way. Once I’ve determined on a course, I try to continue until I’ve achieved success or accepted that success is not possible. It’s important not to give up too soon.”

  “Wow. Did you meet nice women?”

  “Yes. Quite a few. It’s how I met Karen.”

  She gestured wildly. “Get out of here. Karen went through with it? She tried online dating?” With a cry of horror she realized she’d swiped his neat blue and white striped tie with a slash of red icing gel. It looked like the tie had tried to slit its own throat.

  They both looked down, but she was the one who gasped.

  “Oh my gosh. I’m so sorry.”

  He continued as though the disaster had never taken place. “And through Karen, I met you.”

  He swiped his finger over the red gel on his tie and sucked the red goo off his finger. “I’d say it worked quite well.”

  “I’ve ruined your tie,” she cried, holding her palms to her cheeks.

  “Yes, you have. Let me know when you finish that book and we’ll go for coffee.” And he left looking surprisingly happy for a man wearing a suicidal tie.

  16

  WHEN KAREN WALTZED into the kitchen, Laurel experienced a pang of uneasiness. She’d finished The Thirty-Nine Steps and was getting together with Ron Saturday morning for their promised coffee to talk about the book. But she only had his word for it that Karen and he were friends. She’d heard of men who used Internet dating to pull together their own personal harems.

  Not that she could imagine Ron with a harem, but then how well did she know him?

  Karen was in full business mode and checking timing on the various cakes that Laurel was making for her over the next two months. After they’d finished confirming delivery dates, she said, “Um, there’s something I need to tell you.”

  Karen grabbed at her arm. “Oh, God. You look guilty. Please don’t tell me you’re leaving. I can’t take it. Really. Your cakes are so spectacular, you’re part of our success.”

  “No,” she said, half laughing. “It’s nothing to do with my cakes. I’m really happy here.”

  “Oh, that is such a relief.” Karen slapped a hand over her heart. Her manicure was perfect. Laurel really should think about getting one of those. She imagined her fingernails with that shiny pink finish, then couldn’t. She wasn’t the nail polish type. “I’ve finally got my dream team, I can’t bear to lose one of you.”

  “It’s more, um, personal.” She looked down and suddenly wished she hadn’t opened this conversation. She had no idea how to explain herself and felt foolish even trying.

  “You can trust me,” Karen said gently. “If you’re in any kind of trouble…” The hand on her arm was both warm and soothing.

  “Oh, I’m being stupid. It’s nothing. Only Ron asked me out and then he said you and he… And I don’t want to do anything you wouldn’t feel comfortable with, because I am so happy here and…” Her voice petered out and she continued to stare at the floor until she couldn’t stand it anymore and raised her gaze.

  But Karen didn’t look at all angry. More stunned. She said, “You and Ron?” the way a person might say “ice cream and horseradish?” As though the two things couldn’t possibly belong together. “You’re surprised?”

  “Well, yes, to be honest. You don’t seem like you’d have a lot in common.”

  “We both like spy novels. And he has such nice eyes.”

  “Yes, he does.” She tapped her pretty pink nails against her binder. “Wow.”

  Laurel couldn’t gauge what “wow” meant. “So, are you okay with that?”

  The wedding planner seemed miles away. She came back with a start. “Oh, absolutely. Ron and I met through a dating site but we had absolutely no spark. I think he’s a very nice man and he’s a talented accountant and I think we’re becoming friends, but we’re definitely not dating. I’ve hired him to do some work for us.”

  “Okay then, that’s good.”

  “You and Ron. Who should know better than a wedding planner that opposites attract.” She shook her head. “You’ll have to tell me how your coffee date goes.”

  “How did you know we’re having coffee?”

  “That’s how he always starts a relationship.” Then as Laurel’s eyes widened she hastily added, “At least, that’s what he told me. It’s not like I know him intimately or anything.” She cleared her throat, obviously embarrassed. “Because, in case you’re wondering, there was no, you know, between us.”

  Laurel was insensibly cheered by this news. Not that it was any of her business, obviously, if Ron and Karen, who had met before she’d ever met Ron, had hooked up. Still, she was glad they hadn’t. She couldn’t imagine how weird it would be to have sex with a man who’d also slept with a colleague who was the closest thing she had to a boss. Not that she was thinking of having sex with Ron. The very idea had her thinking as muddled as one of her crazy icing color experiments that failed.

  LAUREL ALMOST MISSED the letter grade.

  It wasn’t until she’d made sure she hadn’t left a bookmark or a smudge or anything that might lessen the book—or her—in Ron’s eyes that she noticed the neatly penciled letter A marked on the inside back cover of the paperback.

  An A and then a line of equally neat handwriting. It said: Book that began a genre. Masterpiece?

  She loved the question mark at the end of masterpiece, as though he didn’t want to give out superlatives too easily. Was the A a letter grade like a teacher would give a student paper?

  She traced the comment with her fingertip. She thought of the way so many people throw out words like masterpiece, genius, brilliant, groundbreaking and so on and how rarely the rave was deserved. She’d often heard ridiculously over-the-top praise for her own efforts. But then, Laurel, who was modest about most things, knew that some of her cakes were, in fact, masterpieces. Which suggested that not only mastery of one’s medium of work was necessary, but also something more. Some whiff of the creative, the unusual, that took a creation to a new level.

  She’d never thought of herself in the same realm as artists—she made bakery goods to be consumed, her works of art were no more permanent than a sand castle or an ice sculpture.

  And yet, she liked to think that she lifted the mere cake to a new level, infusing it with meaning and giving joy to those first viewing it and then consuming it.

  A shy woman, she spoke through food.

  Usually.

  Sometimes other forms of communication were necessary and she never found it easy to converse. She was shy, loath from a child to put herself forward. She’d always admired bold women, like Karen, who could go out and meet new people, sell products and services, fight when she had to. Laurel was much happier alone in her corner of the kitchen putting her thoughts into icing rather than words.

  Somehow, she recognized in Ron a kindred spirit. The fact that he’d made this short and measured judgment of a book appealed to her. She couldn’t imagine him in a book club arguing the merits of chaining oneself to a stranger of the opposite sex as a way to solve crime, or discussing the sexual undertones of the book and how they related to the mores of the time. The very notion of Ron arguing in public about sexuality made her want to giggle.

  And if he did want to discuss the book with her over coffee she knew she’d find herself tongue-tied and stupid.

  But she had to say something. In the end, she took a Post-it note, so impermanent it wouldn’t even leave a mark in the book, and below his A and comment she put her own. She said, after much thought and the wanton waste of half a dozen yellow sticky notes:

  He’s an ordinary man who, when forced to save his country, can do extraordinary things. As in so many thriller novels, things aren’t what they seem to be on the surface. I think that’s true of people, too.

  She realized that her note was hardly significant literary criticism, but she didn’t care. Her last line was more of a personal observation that had nothing to do with the novel but she was trying to tell Ron, in her own way, that she wasn’t exactly what she appeared either. She hoped there was more to her than she could articulate.

  As the date approached, she realized, she wanted to be different from all the other women he’d had a first date coffee with. Well, it stood to reason she would be because she was different from pretty much everyone she knew. But ever since Karen had told her that Ron started all his relationships with a coffee date, she’d decided that she wasn’t going to tell her grandchildren that she and Grandpappy had got together over coffee in cardboard containers.

  Nothing as permanent as love should start over anything involved in takeout.

  Laurel wasn’t a bold woman, but she was intuitive and if she’d learned anything in the years she’d studied and practiced yoga and meditation it was to honor her instincts. Of course, she could be wrong. Ron might be entirely wrong for her in the long term but she wasn’t willing to ignore the strong feeling she had that the way they began would be important to their future.

  Wanting to respect his idea of a first date, and yet still make it special, she called him.

  When she picked up his business card to call him on Friday she accidentally left a purple icing thumbprint on the pristine card stock. When she identified herself he sounded instantly distressed. “You’re not cancelling, are you?”

  “No. I’m not. I have an idea. Instead of meeting at a coffee shop, I thought we might have a picnic.”

  There was a tiny pause. “A picnic coffee?”

  “Yes. I will meet you at JFK Plaza.” She didn’t call it by its more familiar name, Love Park, named for the famous red-and-blue sculpture that spelled LOVE with the O tilted sideways.

  “But it’s almost winter.”

  “Wear something warm. I’ll bring the coffee.”

  She was inordinately pleased with herself when he agreed. A first date at Love Park was the kind of outing to tell her grandchildren about. Even if the fountain wasn’t operating, there was a great view of the city by looking northwest down the Benjamin Franklin Parkway, which was supposedly modeled after the Champs Elysées in Paris.

  Laurel had no idea whether that was true or not. She’d never been to Paris, but she liked the idea that she could pretend. Besides, the art museum was at the other end of the plaza and she never tired of going there.

  As she imagined their first date, thought about Ron, she began to create a perfect first cake to go with a perfect first date.

  17

  DEX HAD TAKEN TO texting her. She had no idea why, but the short, sexy, sometimes funny texts were getting to be a bad habit. Of course, it would be rude not to respond, so they began exchanging increasingly steamy messages.

  Every time I see a takeout container I get hard, he texted.

  She shut her phone and tried to ignore the surge of lust his words invoked. After her next appointment, she texted back: I can still feel your lips on my nipple.

  The texts continued in this manner until she got one that puzzled her. Have dinner with me Friday night.

  That’s not sexy, she texted back.

  Trust me, it will be.

  She laughed aloud from the parking lot where she’d picked up the message. Replied, I don’t trust you.

  Hardly a minute had gone by when she had her reply. I know.

  Even though a text message couldn’t have a tone, she felt sadness coming from the words. As she looked at her phone, wondering how to reply, it rang.

  “Hey,” he said.

  “Hey.”

  “So, dinner on Friday night is with the building owners and their wives. What do you say?”

  “I’m not your wife anymore.”

  “I know. But you’re a beautiful, interesting woman and I’d enjoy your company. Then, after dinner, we’ll head to my hotel room and I’ll demonstrate how much I’ve missed you.”

  I’ve missed you, too, she wanted to say. Instead she managed, “I think I can make it.”

  “Thanks. See you Friday.”

  SHE’D NEVER LOOKED MORE GORGEOUS, Dex thought as he escorted Karen into the restaurant. In her simple black dress, she somehow managed to appear both elegant and sexy at the same time.

  He’d loved her sexiness when he’d first met her but he liked looking at her even more now she was a little older. He liked her confidence and the tiny lines at the edges of her eyes. They lured him in.

  She was still a great corporate wife, too, he thought, watching her charm the building owners and make friends with their wives. What could have been a boring business dinner ended up being so much fun that everyone exchanged hugs at the end.

  As they walked away making the short stroll to his hotel in overcoats and gloves, he said, “Thanks, that was more fun than I expected.”