I didn’t doubt him. A vampire in a den of wolves seemed like it’d be an anomaly. “Now I understand why the wolves hate me.”

  Chaser grunted and I knew there was more to it, but for now, I was tied up in the mechanics of transforming.

  “I got you a present.” He handed me a bottle of scotch.

  I raised my eyebrows and took it off him. “No, you didn’t.”

  He smirked. “Yeah, I lied. It was for me. It helps with the…” he gestured to this throat, “but you’re going to need it to take the edge off.”

  “What do you mean? Alcohol helps you?”

  He nodded. “Vampires struggle with hunger. The line between human and monster is thin at best. Alcohol helps with the burn in my throat.”

  I frowned. “Do I make it harder for you?”

  “No, I’ve had a lot of practice.”

  His tongue seemed to be loosening, so I decided to take advantage. Learning about vampires was in my best interests…and maybe I’d learn something about Chaser.

  “You have to die to become a vampire, right?” When he nodded, I added, “Do you remember your life before?”

  He lowered his gaze and took the bottle of scotch from me. I watched him take a long draught and figured his answer was yes.

  “We carry memories,” he finally said. “Shreds of feeling.”

  “You don’t feel?” That explained a lot.

  “We can turn it off.” He took another drink. “Everything a vampire feels is amplified. Sometimes it’s too much…” He drank again. “Who we were before determines who we are after.”

  “And who were you before?”

  His gaze turned fierce, and I snatched the bottle out of his hand. I’d gone too far, and I could sense him shutting off.

  I drank, the scotch burning a trail down into my stomach. “I’m guessing it’s different for a werewolf.”

  “Strength, sight, and smell are the same, though you are bound to a mortal life.”

  “Emotions?”

  “There’s a reason why you’re quick to anger and a pain in my arse.”

  Despite our predicament, I laughed. “Bloody hell, how did we get here? Barbecuing vampires and turning into wolves?”

  “You don’t have to do this, Sloane,” Chaser murmured. “You have a choice. There aren’t many who can say the same.”

  Chaser had been turned against his will. I hesitated, then drank some more scotch.

  “That’s the point,” I told him. “Since meeting you, I know this is the only choice I’ll get to make.”

  The only sound that replied to that gem was the wind and the crackle of the fire.

  “So how do I do this?” I went on. “How do I get things started?”

  “There’s no instruction manual,” Chaser replied. “The instincts are there…you just have to will it.”

  “Okay.” I didn’t understand, but I stood, determined to try. “Don’t follow me. I don’t want an audience for this.”

  “I’ll wait for you here,” he told me. “If you need me, call out and I’ll hear you.”

  I glanced over my shoulder. Chaser was silhouetted by the fire, shoulders hunched with a bottle of scotch in hand.

  “You’re far more human that you realise,” I whispered, knowing he’d hear, then I walked away, fading into the shadow clad Nullarbor Plain.

  Chapter 16

  Sloane

  I walked barefoot away from the fire, the glow behind me.

  The moon lit up the rugged landscape, tinting the windswept trees silver, their branches twisted like gnarled bones. It was beautiful, like a magical parallel universe dusted with a canopy of stars.

  The wind tore at my hair, blowing strands across my face that caught on my lips. Plucking them free, I took a deep breath. If it wasn’t for the roasting vampires, the road trip from hell, and the vampire sitting beside the barbecue somewhere behind me, I would’ve felt a peace…but my heart beat erratically in my chest at the thought of what I was about to do—break every bone in my body.

  The moon hung full and bright, a massive orb mottled with shadowy craters.

  I thought about the dreams I’d been having about it since I’d turned thirteen. Werewolves first turned when they hit puberty, but I hadn’t. Instead, my teenage years were full of strange dreams and an attitude problem I’d put down to my rough upbringing. Now, I realised it was because I was a werewolf by birth. Cursed by the moon and ruled by the wild instincts of a pack animal.

  When I felt like I was far enough away from Chaser, I ducked underneath the skeletal branches of a twisted tree and into a hollow underneath.

  I’d thought more about the pain than the mechanics and I decided it might be a good idea to get undressed. Somehow, I didn’t think clothing was part of the transformation process.

  I folded my clothes into a pile as I stripped, my wind ticking my bare skin, then I sat on a rock, the feeling of the rough stone on my bare arse a little mortifying.

  I was sitting in the middle of nowhere, stark naked, trying to turn into a wolf. A week ago, my biggest problem was tending the bar at the Sailor’s Arms and studying for my exams.

  I ran my hands through my hair. Shit, my exams.

  Looking up at the moon, I said a silent prayer that was full of more swear words than was appropriate.

  Will it…

  I stared at my hands, imagining what it’d be like to see them sprout fur and morph into paws. What colour would my coat be?

  Shaking my head, I snorted. Like it mattered.

  Will it…

  My wrists cracked, forcing my hands to twist backwards at an awkward angle. Pain stabbed into me like a red-hot poker and I cried out, tears springing to my eyes.

  Then my spine curled, snapping and popping like fireworks down each vertebrae. I slid off the rock and fell onto my knees, breathing heavily. I cried out in agony as my arms twisted, then my legs broke, and my knee joints popped out of place.

  I collapsed, sobbing and writhing. I had no other thoughts. I’d lost control of my body, the transformation taking over as the wolf within emerged, one agonising bone at a time.

  Fur sprouted over my bare arms and legs, covering my face and belly. I twisted, convulsing one last time…then I rose on all fours.

  My gaze shifted, the world sharpening as if I were focusing a camera lens. Blurry at first, then it all made sense. The silver landscape I’d seen as a human became more defined—from the rise and fall of the land, the shadows cast by the scrub, the tracks left behind by wildlife, the dusting of stars above, and the glow of the moon.

  My paws dug into the gritty earth, and I lowered my snout, sniffing. The aura of salt, dirt, trees, and green things filled my nose…and in the distance, the stench of smoke and charred corpses.

  Muscles coiled within me and I ran, leaping and bounding with intoxicating speed. My paws landed sure-footedly, my instincts guiding me across the plain.

  I followed the currents, the wind guiding me towards the edge of the world. Ahead, the plain sheered off at a sharp right angle, the cliff falling towards the raging ocean. Skidding to a halt, I gazed over the edge, watching the waves crash against the rocks. They foamed silver and white before fading into the inky blackness beyond.

  The wind carried other noises, and between the gusts, I heard footsteps. He was looking for me.

  How long had I been running? The freedom was unlike anything I’d known and all I wanted to do was disappear into the wilderness, to never return to Sloane, to be the wolf within…but something tugged at my mind—a warning, a memory—and I turned back.

  I wasn’t sure what happened next, or how I got from the cliff back to the twisted tree where I’d left my clothes.

  I lay flat on my back, my body human, my fur and fangs gone. Above, the moon had lowered almost to the horizon, setting as the night gave way to the rising sun.

  I heard my name over the howling wind and sat up. My hair covered my naked breasts and I shivered, my humanity flooding back in a nauseating wave.

  “Sloane!”

  The wind turned, driving towards me, and I drew in a deep breath. That’s when I smelt it for the first time.

  Blood, shadow, death.

  Vampire.

  When he came out of the shadows, I stared as if I was seeing him for the first time. The man who’d grabbed me at the pub, the man who’d kidnapped me from my ordinary life, and the man who…who was what? As I looked at him, I wasn’t quite sure anymore.

  Everything was different now.

  Chaser stared at me, his gaze dipping slightly before he looked away.

  “Are you all right?” he managed to ask.

  “I…” I wrapped my arms around myself. My bare skin was pricked with goosebumps, and I was starting to shiver despite the warmth in my skin.

  “You were gone all night,” he said, picking up my clothes and handing them to me. “I wasn’t sure if you were coming back.”

  I clutched my T-shirt against my chest, my entire body tingling with heightened sensations.

  “Neither did I,” I whispered.

  Chaser knelt beside me, his eyes glowing mysteriously as the first sliver of dawn touched the horizon. “How do you feel?”

  “Alive,” I managed to say. “I feel alive.”

  Chapter 17

  Sloane

  I sat sideways in the passenger seat of the car, my arms wrapped around my middle, watching Chaser scatter the ashes of the pyre.

  Every nerve ending in my body screamed at me, both from the aftermath of my first transformation and from the new sensations I was experiencing.

  My vision was sharper, scents were more defined, and my emotions were more stable than they’d ever been. It was like a piece of my brain that I hadn’t known I was missing had clicked into place, and I was complete. All the pathways in my head ran smoothly, the temper that usually rose when I was exhausted had mellowed all the way to zero, and I was left with a calm sense of acceptance.

  Overhead, the sky was turning. Another day was here, and we were still in the middle of nothing and nowhere. I’d lost count of how many days Chaser and I had been on the run, tied together by some unknown conspiracy.

  “Sloane?”

  I blinked, raising my head. Chaser stood before me, and my nose filled with the odd scent that seemed to follow vampires around. I couldn’t quite place what it reminded me of, but the image it conjured in my head was one of the shadow and death that went with being a supernatural predator of the night.

  “You smell strange,” I told him.

  His lips quirked. “So I’ve been told.”

  I rubbed my jaw. “I feel like I’ve been shoved through a meat grinder.”

  “Take it easy for now,” he told me. “I’m not sure how long your strength will be around for. If it’s tied to the moon, then it’ll only be for today.”

  Looking up at him, I squinted as the first rays of the sun shone over the horizon. “Are we leaving?”

  “We need to get back on the road. Cross the border.”

  I nodded and turned in the seat, kicking my feet into the footwell. He closed the door, the sound ringing in my ears, and he got in the driver’s seat.

  Leaving another two bodies behind hadn’t helped our chances of reaching Melbourne without being pulled over by the cops or being tracked but getting out of Western Australia was the first step at wiping the slate clean.

  Honestly, I didn’t even know where we were anymore. This stretch of the Eyre highway, every motel room, and every sunrise was the same as the last. At this rate, I was sure our road trip would never end.

  The murky dawn morphed into daylight, and we didn’t speak. The car seemed to be a dead zone for feelings, and after last night, neither of us made an effort to define what’d happened.

  Leaning my head against the window, I stared into the side mirror, half looking at myself with my blue aviator sunglasses and half looking at the road in our wake. A truck sat a few car lengths behind us, but I couldn’t make out anything else. The mirror was too small.

  Several dead bodies had been left in our wake, I’d been attacked, shot at, threatened, I’d turned into a wolf, and I was surprisingly mellow about the whole thing. Desensitised, like I knew it was going to happen. Like it was supposed to be normal.

  I was ten when the first dead body dropped into my life. Sometimes, you’ve just gotta turn off all the bits inside you that care to get through the storm called life. I didn’t know if it made me a survivor or a fruitcake, but it was what I’d always done.

  We went over a bump and my head cracked against the window. I winced as the blow vibrated through my entire body.

  Chaser glanced at me. “You okay?”

  I looked at him, hyperaware of the fact that I ached everywhere. My transformation hadn’t been as smooth as I’d imagined, and I wondered if it’d get any easier. If I didn’t have to change, then maybe I’d just stay human…but I’d miss out on the exhilarating freedom of running as a wolf. It was a trade-off of epic proportions.

  “I’ll survive,” I replied, my voice hoarse. “At least until we get to Melbourne.”

  His jaw tightened, but he didn’t glance away from the road.

  “You let me turn, which will give me a chance...”

  “But it’s not enough.”

  “No,” I muttered, looking out the window.

  The road noise was the only sound between us. By the looks of it, Chaser wasn’t used to whispering sweet nothings or apologising.

  “You’re handling this incredibly well,” he managed to say.

  “Keep going on like that, and I’ll start to believe you actually care about me.”

  “I already said I did.”

  “Yeah, but I didn’t believe you.”

  “What about now?”

  I laughed and shook my head. “You sound like a clingy boyfriend.”

  He grunted. “What was it like growing up? Now you know what you are, does it make sense?”

  “You really want to know about my messed-up childhood?” I asked, raising my eyebrows.

  “You wanted me to give up everything for you a couple of days ago. Maybe I need a reason.”

  I froze. What in the world was going on here? I studied Chaser’s profile and worried my bottom lip with my teeth. So all that hostility was his shield, not his identity. Interesting.

  “Was our D&M by the bonfire that good?” I asked.

  “Huh?” He glanced at me before turning back to the road.

  I shook my head and played with my hair. He knew exactly what I was talking about, the crafty bastard.

  “I didn’t know any different,” I said, deciding to answer his question differently. He was fishing, so I was going to tear the entire rod out of his hands and pull him into the water. “I thought I was like every other little girl I went to school with. I didn’t know I was a wolf, but I knew something was up with my father. Mum was great about keeping me away from the truth—a real master at hiding the crime and violence he was into.” I snorted and picked at the hem of my T-shirt. “Dad was hardly around. I got the odd birthday present, but it was never consistent. It wasn’t until I was older that I realised who he was and what my mother had done for me.”

  Looking back, I knew I was too young to understand all the signs—Dad’s absence, Mum’s broken arm, her cuts, and bruises. The comings and goings at all hours of the night, the hushed whispers.

  “She put on a brave face,” I murmured. “And it was all for me. I was half him, but I was half her, too.”

  “She protected you,” Chaser said.

  “From everything. After she was gone, I came to realise just how much pain she shielded me from. It was all my fault. Now I understand she knew I was a werewolf and kept me close to the pack so I’d have that support when the time came. If I wasn’t born, then she would’ve been long gone.”

  “You can’t blame yourself for her decisions…or your father’s.”

  “We all make our choices, Chaser. Mum made hers, and so did my father. He knows how I feel about him, right down to the last wart. My opinion will never change. I don’t want to see him, even though he has all the answers about what I am.”

  “He wants to save your life now—”

  “Don’t you dare defend that man,” I snapped. I sat back in the passenger seat and kicked my feet up onto the dash. “He wants to save my life to save his pride and line his bank account. I’m not his daughter, I’m a commodity. The werewolf who can change at will.”

  Chaser fell silent, and I didn’t have the heart to look at him. I was stuck between my desire to escape a terrible fate and the truth about who I was. I knew what I was asking him to do was just as bad. For him, it was a choice between repaying his mysterious debt to Fortitude or betraying my father for me…a stranger.

  We’d had one night of him softening towards me, but ultimately, nothing had changed. Nothing at all.

  Knowing it tore my heart in two.

  “Did you know her?” I asked. “Did you know me?”

  “No,” he whispered. “I didn’t.”

  I wasn’t sure if that was the truth, but did it matter? The past was long buried.

  “They slit her throat, you know,” I murmured, watching the blur of scrub streak past outside.

  The creak of leather signalled Chaser had tightened his grip on the wheel. The sound was louder than normal, my wolf ears zeroing in on the minutest of details. “She was lying on the kitchen floor in a pool of blood.”

  “Sloane, you don’t have to—”

  “Did he tell you how she died?” I asked.

  “It’s not my business.”

  “I was told it was a home invasion, that some bad guys had broken into our house while I was at school and attacked her. I sat at the police station, a ten-year-old girl, and waited for my dad to come get me. The dad who was never there, but who was all I had left…and he never did. I never heard from him again.” Until Chaser had sauntered into my life, but there was no point in saying it. “At least I was spared from finding her, but I knew it wasn’t a random attack. Even at ten, I understood…and now? Who really killed her, Chaser?”