Praise for The Essential Peter S. Beagle, Vol I & II

  “Master enchanter Peter S. Beagle is best known for his novel The Last Unicorn, a book which has charmed generations of readers. But the briefer enchantments collected in these two volumes also brim with the deepest and truest of his magical powers: with laughter, with wisdom, and with the ineffable pleasure of the imaginary memories he shares. From the gradually refined focus of ‘Professor Gottesman and the Indian Rhinoceros’ to the crankily slipped-and-skewed perspective of ‘Vanishing,’ these are visions of an inner world all of us need to visit again and again. Each tale is a spell welcoming our hearts to their real home: wonder.”

  —Nisi Shawl, author of Everfair

  “Stepping into a Peter Beagle story is like stepping out your front door into an alternate, but entirely logical, world: Your girlfriend seems to be a werewolf, the evening news is anchored by the Angel of Death, dreadful poetry is a lethal weapon, and a Berkeley traffic cop has to negotiate a depressed dragon out of an intersection. But then, what else to expect from a wizard of mischief like Beagle? Two perfect volumes that should come with a warning: When you try and go back inside your house, all its rooms will have changed.”

  —Laurie R. King, author of The Beekeeper’s Apprentice

  “Having all these Peter Beagle stories collected together is pure joy. His writing has amazed me my whole life. You’d think I’d be used to it by now, but the amazement is ongoing.”

  —Carrie Vaughn, author of the Kitty Norville series

  “This was an amazing collection, and I cannot recommend it enough for existing fans of Mr. Beagle or fans of fantasy shorts or cozy fantasy.”

  —All Booked Up

  “Peter S. Beagle’s short stories tap into the sweetest sap of the soul and leave their mark forever. He always makes me cry in the most wonderful and necessary way.”

  —Delilah S. Dawson, author of Wicked as They Come

  “The Essential Peter S. Beagle Volumes I & II are everything I hoped for and wanted them to be. Beagle’s clever and utterly whimsical storytelling is evident in every story, and I love jumping from tale to tale and exploring the facets of his mind. The writing is fun and explores the unique while keeping one foot in the familiar, making it perfect for readers of all ages. I highly recommend these charming volumes!”

  —Charlie N. Holmberg, author of Keeper of Enchanted Rooms

  Praise for Peter S. Beagle

  “One of my favorite writers.”

  —Madeleine L’Engle, author of A Wrinkle in Time

  “Peter S. Beagle illuminates with his own particular magic such commonplace matters as ghosts, unicorns, and werewolves. For years a loving readership has consulted him as an expert on those hearts’ reasons that reason does not know.”

  —Ursula K. Le Guin, author of A Wizard of Earthsea

  “Peter S. Beagle has both opulence of imagination and mastery of style.”

  —New York Times Book Review

  “At his best, Peter S. Beagle outshines the moon, the sun, the stars, the entire galaxy.”

  —Seattle Times

  “Peter Beagle deserves a seat at the table with the great masters of fantasy.”

  —Christopher Moore, author of Lamb and The Serpent of Venice

  “Not only one of our greatest fantasists, but one of our greatest writers, a magic realist worthy of consideration with such writers as Márquez, Allende, and even Borges.”

  —The American Culture

  “We all have something to learn—about writing, about humanity, about hope—from Peter Beagle.”

  —Seanan McGuire author of Rosemary and Rue

  “Peter S. Beagle is (in no particular order) a wonderful writer, a fine human being, and a bandit prince out to steal readers’ hearts.”

  —Tad Williams, author of Tailchaser’s Song

  “Peter S. Beagle is a master of the magical.”

  —Kurt Busiek, author of Astro City and The Avengers

  “[Beagle] has been compared, not unreasonably, with Lewis Carroll and J. R. R. Tolkien, but he stands squarely and triumphantly on his own feet.”

  —Saturday Review

  “Peter S. Beagle is the magician we all apprenticed ourselves to.”

  —Lisa Goldstein, author of The Red Magician

  “One of the all-time greats.”

  —The Guardian

  Also by Peter S. Beagle

  Fiction

  A Fine and Private Place (1960)

  The Last Unicorn (1968)

  Lila the Werewolf (1969)

  The Folk of the Air (1986)

  The Innkeeper’s Song (1993)

  The Unicorn Sonata (1996)

  Tamsin (1999)

  A Dance for Emilia (2000)

  The Last Unicorn: The Lost Version (2007)

  Return (2010)

  Summerlong (2016)

  In Calabria (2017)

  The Way Home (2023)

  Short fiction collections

  Giant Bones (1997)

  The Rhinoceros Who Quoted Nietzsche and Other Odd Acquaintances (1997)

  The Line Between (2006)

  Your Friendly Neighborhood Magician: Songs and Early Poems (2006)

  We Never Talk About My Brother (2009)

  Mirror Kingdoms: The Best of Peter S. Beagle (2010)

  Sleight of Hand (2011)

  The Overneath (2017)

  Nonfiction

  I See By My Outfit (1965)

  The California Feeling (with Michael Bry, 1969)

  The Lady and Her Tiger (with Pat Derby, 1976)

  The Garden of Earthly Delights (1982)

  In the Presence of Elephants (with Pat Derby and Genaro Molina, 1995)

  As editor

  Peter S. Beagle’s Immortal Unicorn (with Janet Berliner, 1995)

  The Secret History of Fantasy (2010)

  The Urban Fantasy Anthology (with Joe R. Lansdale, 2011)

  The New Voices of Fantasy (with Jacob Weisman, 2017)

  The Unicorn Anthology (with Jacob Weisman, 2019)

  A Note from the Publisher About Piracy

  Dear Reader,

  Thank you so much for purchasing this digital copy. We hope you enjoy it.

  This book is intended for review only. Please do not share, reproduce, post, or resell it. All editions of this book are protected by international copyright law; all rights are reserved without the express permission of the author and the publishers.

  Piracy is illegal. It hinders publishers from putting out more great books like this. Most importantly, piracy keeps authors from getting paid.

  If you have any questions about copyright, or if you think this copy was pirated, please immediately contact us at tachyon@tachyonpublications.com.

  Thank you,

  Tachyon Publications LLC

  1459 18th Street #139

  San Francisco, CA 94107

  415.285.5615

  tachyon@tachyonpublications.com

  The Essential Peter S. Beagle: Volume 2

  © 2023 by Peter S. Beagle

  This is a collection of fiction. All events portrayed in this book are fictitious, and any resemblance to real people or events is purely coincidental. All rights reserved, including the right to reproduce this book or portions thereof in any form without the express permission of the author and the publisher.

  Introduction © by Meg Elison

  Cover art and interior illustrations by Stephanie Law

  Cover design and interior layout by Elizabeth Story

  Tachyon Publications LLC

  1459 18th Street #139

  San Francisco, CA 94107

  415.285.5615

  www.tachyonpublications.com

  tachyon@tachyonpublications.com

  Series editor: Jacob Weisman

  Project editor: Jaymee Goh

  Print ISBN: 978-1-61696-390-3

  Digital ISBN: 978-1-61696-391-0

  Printed in the United States by Versa Press, Inc.

  First Edition: 2023

  9 8 7 6 5 4 3 2 1

  “Sleight of Hand” © 2009 by Peter S. Beagle. First published in Eclipse Three: New Science Fiction and Fantasy (Night Shade Books), edited by Jonathan Strahan.

  “Oakland Dragon Blues” © 2009 by Peter S. Beagle. First published in The Dragon Book: Magical Tales from the Masters of Modern Fantasy (Ace), edited by Jack Dann and Gardner Dozois.

  “The Rock in the Park” © 2010 by Peter S. Beagle. First published in Sleight of Hand (Tachyon). Derived from an original podcast performance recorded for The Green Man Review.

  “The Rabbi’s Hobby” © 2008 by Peter S. Beagle. First published in Eclipse Two: New Science Fiction and Fantasy (Night Shade Books), edited by Jonathan Strahan.

  “The Way It Works Out and All” © 2011 by Peter S. Beagle. First published in The Magazine of Fantasy & Science Fiction, July–August 2011.

  “The Best Worst Monster” © 2011 by Peter S. Beagle. First published in Sleight of Hand (Tachyon).

  “La Lune T’Attend” © 2010 by Peter S. Beagle. First published in Full Moon City (Pocket), edited by Darrel Schweitzer and Martin H. Greenberg.

  “The Story of Kao Yu” © 2016 by Peter S. Beagle. First published by Tor.com.

  “Trinity County, CA: You’ll Want to Come Again and We’ll Be Glad to See You!” © 2001 by Peter S. Beagle. First published in Or
son Scott Card’s Intergalactic Medicine Show, August 2010.

  “Marty and the Messenger” © 2005 by Peter S. Beagle. Derived from an original podcast performance recorded for The Green Man Review.

  “The Mantichora” © 2023. Original to this collection.

  “Mr. McCaslin” © 2005 by Peter S. Beagle. Derived from an original podcast performance recorded for The Green Man Review.

  “The Fifth Season” © 2005 by Peter S. Beagle. Derived from an original podcast performance recorded for The Green Man Review.

  “Tarzan Swings by Barsoom” © 2012. First appeared as “The Ape Man of Mars” in Under the Moon of Mars: New Adventures in Barsoom (Simon & Schuster), edited by John Joseph Adams.

  “The Bridge Partner” © 2011 by Peter S. Beagle. First published in Sleight of Hand (Tachyon).

  “Vanishing” © 2010 by Peter S. Beagle. First appeared in Orson Scott Card’s Intergalactic Medicine Show, March 2009.

  Table of Contents

  Introduction: “Eating the Heart of Peter S. Beagle” by Meg Elison

  “Sleight of Hand”

  “Oakland Dragon Blues”

  “The Rock in the Park”

  “The Rabbi’s Hobby”

  “The Way It Works Out and All”

  “The Best Worst Monster”

  “La Lune T’Attend”

  “The Story of Kao Yu”

  “Trinity County, CA: You’ll Want to Come Again and We’ll Be Glad to See You!”

  “Marty and the Messenger”

  “The Mantichora”

  “Mr. McCaslin”

  “The Fifth Season”

  “Tarzan Swings by Barsoom”

  “The Bridge Partner”

  “Vanishing”

  “Eating the Heart of Peter S. Beagle”

  by Meg Elison

  It is the mistake of a rank amateur reader to assume that they know the author by their work.

  The author is feeding us pieces of his heart, but we can’t know how he cut them, how he changed them first. What we taste is not the whole truth. This was something I understood long before I met Peter S. Beagle; I knew better than to believe him to be the devilishly clever, compassionate, and grandfatherly figure I imagined as I read his books and stories, as I received the pulverized bits of his heart he had carved off and reconstituted into Star Trek and books like the luminous Summerlong. I knew the Beagle in my mind was the wine and not the fruit. I should expect the usual experience of the author on tour: a tired and grumpy person who has been in too many cars and airplanes and is either getting a cold or getting over one and would like very much not to shake any more hands.

  Instead, the man fed me his heart.

  The Essential Peter S. Beagle Vol. 2 is another opportunity for readers to taste Peter S. Beagle. His unmatched capacity for fantasy is on display here, with dragons guarding the lairs of drug dealers and the kind of inexplicable slides through time and space that inspire us to imagine the people we might have come from and the people we might have been had history run just a little bit differently. His turbulence of emotion and depth of connection appears in “The Rabbi’s Hobby,” an unforgettable jewel of a story about loss and what it means to be haunted, to never forget. In each of these, the author’s heart is cut up and fed to us, bite by bite. In a career this long, we know that he has to grow it back each time. There are so many of us to feed. And in this body of work, no one goes without.

  Not content with being a master of fantasy, Beagle also brings that same macerated heart to tales of science fiction like “Marty and the Messenger,” a playful tale of food that speaks up and finds the author himself in the cosmos, spoon poised, ready to eat and be eaten in his eagerness to know what new life-forms are like. As always, Beagle’s heart brings distinct flavor to the voice of a fairy tale and a legend, and “The Mantichora” is another entry in that never-ending story that every author takes up their chance to tell.

  Reading Peter S. Beagle is so like meeting him that I struggle to keep the two separate in my mind. In stories like “Marty and the Messenger” and “The Fifth Season,” when the author is present as a character, it is literary and correct to assume that the character is not the man. The author has been safely solipsized into an untouchable version of the man himself, a figure of speech rather than the speaking figure himself.

  Yet I cannot help but feel that same beating heart in his work as I felt in his presence. His voice is so utterly the same on the page as it is on the stage. The night that I met Peter, he told stories about the authors he knew, famous and infamous, with a collegial wit and a need to reveal them as he revealed himself. He sat for hours with an endless line of people wanting their works signed, some of them getting the maximum number inscribed and getting back in line to complete their quest. Some of them mentioned only his earliest works, having read nothing since The Last Unicorn (1968), and he was unfailingly kind to each.

  The moment I remember best from that long night is when a fan asked Peter to record a talking-head video for some grandchildren who could not attend, kids who loved his work and would get a kick out of hearing from the man himself. Peter hesitated not one second but put on his best grin and spoke into the lens as if he could see the favored children there, finishing with a flourish and wishing them adventures and joy.

  As the man turned his phone around, his face fell as he realized he hadn’t been recording at all during that time.

  Peter again, without hesitation, said, “That was just a dress rehearsal!” With the same energy, he addressed the children he would never meet, wishing them good stories and deep down-filled pillows to support their dreams. He didn’t complain, he didn’t so much as roll an eye at the man’s lack of savvy or tact. He simply gave his heart away, one beat at a time. Everyone watching could taste it. The man with the grandkids took it home in a doggy bag.

  I’m not encouraging rank amateurism in you, reader. I’m not trying to tell you that you know this man from top to bottom when you read his work. There’s more to any person than what can be pressed between the pages of a book or revealed in any brief couple of meetings. We cannot swallow him whole; we can only have a taste here and there.

  This collection is another series of tastes of Peter S. Beagle’s heart. It is sweet, and it is bitter. It is served up for you in a dozen different ways. It is a taste you will never forget. It is cut from him and from the whole of his work; you won’t know all of him through reading just this.

  But what you know will be true.

  This story was crafted out of childhood memories, a chance encounter with a preposterous ad in an even more preposterous location, and the raw, constant terror I felt when my closest cousin was about to go into surgery for a brain aneurysm. At the time I was too paralyzed by fear for her to do anything but call her husband twice a day for news of her condition. Afterward, when she came out of the operation in fine shape, and I could think again, I found myself writing what follows.

  Sleight of Hand

  She had no idea where she was going. When she needed to sleep she stopped at the first motel; when the Buick’s gas gauge dropped into the red zone she filled the tank, and sometimes bought a sandwich or orange juice at the attached convenience store. Now and then during one of these stops she spoke with someone who was neither a desk clerk nor a gas-station attendant, but she forgot all such conversations within minutes, as she forgot everything but the words of the young policeman who had come to her door on a pleasant Wednesday afternoon, weeks and worlds ago. Nothing had moved in her since that point except the memory of his shakily sympathetic voice, telling her that her husband and daughter were dead: ashes in a smoking, twisted, unrecognizable ruin, because, six blocks from their home, a drowsy adolescent had mistaken his accelerator for his brake pedal.