“Are you there?” I asked him.

  “How?” The single word allowed me to hear clearly just how affected he was by the news. I closed my eyes, trying to catch my breath.

  “Murdered. It was violent and I’m not going to lie to you, so far there are no suspects.”

  A noise indicated he’d either sat down or tossed something. “What about my niece and nephew? Where are they? Are they hurt? Do they know? How the fuck do you know?”

  “Calm down. Willow is with me.”

  “With you. Alright. And Shane?” He seemed confused.

  “He’s nowhere to be found.”

  After snorting I could hear his nervous laughter. “What the fuck does that mean?”

  “That means he’s not answering his phone and Willow hasn’t seen him since they arrived, although he was supposed to attend a family celebration.”

  “My God.”

  I allowed him time to absorb what I’d told him, if that was even possible.

  “Okay. What is Willow doing with you?” My friend was already moving to the anger phase. Something I knew far too well.

  “She’s under my protection.”

  The next round of silence was followed by an explosion of emotion including hatred. “So that fucking life of yours finally affected my family? My. Family? I told you never to allow them to know about your business. I asked you one thing from our friendship. One. Never, ever to allow your fucking criminal world to bleed over into theirs. Let me guess. This is all because of you and your fucking mafia friends. Right?”

  “Greg. Leandro was also murdered.”

  He hadn’t been expecting that. “Oh, God. I’m sorry. I’m really sorry. You think the same people killed all three. Right?”

  Exhaling, I held the glass to my head. “I do. That’s why Willow is here.”

  He would eventually find out I’d lied to him, but right now, what he was discovering was far too painful to add onto the shit he’d be forced to deal with.

  “Keep my niece safe. No matter what you need to do, keep her safe.”

  The anguish from keeping him partially in the dark wasn’t something that would go away any time soon. “Don’t worry, my friend. I will protect her with my life. Now, I need to ask you a difficult question.”

  “What isn’t difficult right now? Just ask me.”

  “What do you really know about your nephew? Have you kept in touch with him? Are you aware of his activities, his job description?”

  Gregory laughed, but I sensed anger in his tone. “What the fuck are you getting at?”

  It was time to remove the kid gloves. “Is there a chance he hasn’t been working as a foreign diplomat for quite a while?”

  “You asshole.”

  “Learning about Shane’s activities recently is vital to determining who placed a target on your brother’s head. I know you’re angry with me and perhaps you have every right to be, but this is my world. Not yours. If you know anything that might help, it’s best you tell me.”

  “Why does that sound like a threat, my friend?”

  “It’s not a threat. But a promise that whoever killed my brother will face my wrath. Do you understand?”

  “Oh, I get it. You’ve pinned this on my nephew because you’ve lost touch with your dangerous organization. Well, don’t bring my family into this. My brother and his wife are dead. I blame you.”

  Blame was something I was used to.

  He ended the call as I’d known he would. In a world where monsters were often considered heroes, the common man, one with no ruthless intentions the underdog, he’d proven that the two worlds couldn’t mix. I’d lost a friend over accepting the position I’d been born into.

  It was painful but necessary.

  My loyalty had to remain with my family.

  No matter the circumstances.

  No matter the danger.

  No matter the lies.

  I would soon need to lay down the gauntlet. As soon as I did, it would be time to see how many cockroaches crawled out of the darkness.

  One thing was certain. I’d enjoy crushing them.

  However, I’d made a pledge to protect Willow and I intended on keeping it.

  Even if it meant crossing the line.

  CHAPTER 10

  Willow

  Bastard.

  Asshole.

  Jerk.

  How many more names could I allow to swell inside my weary brain? Commanding me to stay in my room. Who did he think he was, God?

  Not just in stature either.

  My temple still ached, no doubt from the level of anger that swirled within me.

  Why was happiness fleeting?

  Why was the world such a dangerous place?

  And why was it that I couldn’t get Dimitrios out of my mind?

  The questions would haunt me for days. Weeks. I sat curled up on the bed, the notepad Eleni had brought me untouched. I even had the pen in my hand, trying to find solace in creating something special for my parents. Nothing came to me. Nothing good at least.

  I’d learned about the various stages of grief and I was quickly moving into the furious stage.

  Angry with God.

  Angry with Shane.

  Angry with my parents for daring to leave me.

  Angry with myself.

  And most of all, furious with Dimitrios.

  He was so fucking cavalier about what was going on, almost acting as if bloodshed and violence were nothing more than a typical part of the day. Meanwhile, I’d never been faced with anything so horrible in my life. Maybe I had rose-colored glasses on, refusing to acknowledge the reality of the ugly world.

  I tossed the pen across the bed, dropping my head into my hands. What the hell was wrong with people?

  Maybe it was good I didn’t have time to feel any sorrier for myself than I already was; the light knock on the door interrupted me from wallowing in my pain.

  “Yes?” My stomach lurched, the butterflies inside swarming as excitement tore through me. Maybe it was Dimitrios. There I went again, fantasizing about a merciless man.

  Eleni opened the door tentatively, peering inside as if I might toss a bomb in her direction. She had her hands loaded with a tray and something draped over her arm.

  “I’m sorry to… bother you.” Her lovely face was furrowed with a frown.

  “It’s fine. Not like I’m going anywhere.” My stomach flipped in a different way when I gathered a whiff of something that smelled delicious. While the thought of eating in these conditions riled me, my tummy had other ideas in mind. I was famished.

  “I brought you something.”

  On her tray was something steaming plus a carafe of red wine and a glass. She carefully walked inside, placing the tray on the end of the bed since there wasn’t a table and chairs meant for eating food.

  “What did you do?”

  She blushed and pulled open the domed lid. “I thought you might be… homesick. I had the chef make you an American pot pie. Chicken. And wine of course. The finest cabernet. Oh, I hope you like red wine.”

  It was such a kind gesture, it brought tears to my eyes. She almost seemed as if she would panic from my reaction. “No, I’m fine. This is… amazing.”

  Eleni was still clinging onto something. As she placed the items next to the tray of food, another blush formed on her already rosy cheeks. “You have no clothes. Yes?”

  “No clothes.” There was no reason to go into why.

  “I brought you a few things. Just for now.”

  I didn’t think anything could touch me so much, but the effort she’d gone to allowed me to feel a touch of normalcy in a chaotic and disturbing world. “You are so sweet. Thank you so much. I won’t get them dirty.”

  At least she laughed. “Play clothes.”

  “Sas efcharistó.” While I knew very little in Greek, I’d learned please and, more important, thank you.

  Her eyes opened wide. “You are very welcome. I will leave you alone.”

  I watched her walk out and when she turned slightly, studying me in a way I knew she had something to say, I forced my face to brighten.

  “Mr. Nomikos is a good man. He will never hurt you.”

  No, Mr. Nomikos is a certifiable asshole.

  I wanted to tell her that he already had by destroying the tiny bubble I’d placed around myself regarding him.

  But I chose not to.

  “I hope so.”

  She walked out, closing the door behind her and I realized immediately she hadn’t locked it. A mistake or a mandate? While I couldn’t be certain, I wasn’t going to forgo the slight freedom.

  Plus, I was starving. After pouring some wine, I held the glass in the air. A gourmet meal for a girl who might be on death row.

  The thought was revolting but also cathartic. I had no one in my corner, no safety mechanism. For all I knew, if I dared contact Athena again or made it to her house, Dimitrios would kill her. I couldn’t risk losing anyone else.

  The fork in hand, I plunged the tines deep into the center, allowing steam to rise. There was no reason for me to be upset that delicious food was being served to me, but tears slipped past my lashes again. How had everything in my life vanished?

  As I took a tentative bite, bitter sobs almost derailed my chance to enjoy such a fabulous dinner. I choked them back, taking tiny bites to keep my stomach from rejecting the fabulous food. The chef had done an amazing job of bringing me a slice of home.

  Just thinking about the house we’d left, every room messy given our hurry to make it to the airport in time, I knew going back would be one of the toughest things I’d be forced to do. Then there were the funerals to plan and the people to call, bills to sort out and…

  And…

  I reached again for the carafe of wine, pouring the glass full. At least the taste, a sweet combination of blackberries and a slight hint of basil, was welcoming. Maybe I’d be able to keep everything down.

  As I continued digging into the pie, I was shocked how hungry I really was. When I looked down again, I realized I’d eaten almost three quarters of it. And the pot pie was huge, big pieces of tender chicken the main ingredient. Guilt tore through me finally and I pushed the tray away. How could I eat when my parents were lying in a cold morgue somewhere?

  I hadn’t been able to say goodbye.

  What if their bodies weren’t released to the United States?

  No, I couldn’t do this to myself. Not now.

  My stomach lurched and I was fearful I’d vomit. I rushed into the bathroom, gripping the edge of the counter as I tried to keep that from happening. There was a girl staring back at me in the mirror I didn’t recognize. She seemed helpless where the one I remembered had been brought up strong and resilient. Her eyes were dead, almost as if they’d never had any life in them at all.

  Even her hair was stringy, several locks caked to her neck.

  “What happened to you?”

  Maybe the better question was what had happened to my sanity. There was no good answer.

  I suddenly felt dirty, more than I had in a long time.

  With nothing but time on my hands, I decided to take a long, hot shower. Maybe if I scrubbed my skin hard enough, I’d lose all sense of feeling. That would keep grief away. Right?

  As an added benefit, I could wash off Dimitrios’ odor as well. His aftershave continued to linger, filling my system with toxicity. I hated the man and all he stood for. The last thing I wanted to do was to smell like him.

  Eleni had brought a dress and a pair of pants that were drawstring along with another shirt. Why she’d think I’d put on something sexy was beyond me. I hadn’t gone to sleep only to wake up in every girl’s fantasy.

  I’d awakened to a nightmare.

  I grabbed the pants and shirt, realizing I’d have no clean underwear. Whatever. At this point I didn’t care. I’d go without. After closing the door and ripping off my clothes, I made a face at the girl from before. It was time for her to suck it up and return to the woman she’d become. I couldn’t allow this to destroy me.

  Needing to brush my teeth, I opened every drawer on the vanity, slamming them closed when they held nothing of value. Hopefully, the jerk who lived here heard my tantrum.

  With the water turned on, I waited until it was exceptionally hot before I stepped inside. As much as I’d told myself I couldn’t stand Dimitrios and would never help or trust him, I found myself drinking in his scent before washing it away.

  I leaned against the back wall and closed my eyes, concentrating on the sound the water was making as it flowed down the drain. Maybe, like my life, the water was going straight to hell. The sickness I felt was only overpowered by the sense of loneliness.

  A horrible image of the blood in the sunroom attempted to shatter my resolve but I refused to allow it, shaking my head to try to eliminate the stark imagery.

  My mind was fuzzy, yet another series of mental pictures became scattered, vivid and full of detail.

  Him.

  The brutal Greek with the body made for filth, and imploring eyes that held the ability to see right through you. I touched my lips, envisioning kissing his. It was so real, so pronounced that my pussy throbbed all over again. If there was one truth, it was an answer to my insanity.

  I needed him. Now.

  His arms.

  His warmth.

  His touch.

  Oh, God. What was I thinking? Was it wrong, forbidden? Would I be committing a sin?

  At this point in my life, what did it matter? I was lost in a sea of violence that I wasn’t certain I’d be rescued from.

  Both nipples were swollen as I made my way under the showerhead. I had to exorcise my dark desires before they got the better of me.

  With my hair wet, I grabbed the scrubby ball and soap, dousing the thing with enough soap to clean a horse. As I scrubbed my skin, starting with my face, I rubbed hard enough almost immediately my skin tingled. I was vigorous with my actions, ignoring the discomfort, washing my arms and chest, concentrating on my breasts. Maybe I could make them ache for another reason than thoughts of him.

  Him.

  I couldn’t think his name for fear I’d lose all sense of self control.

  For all the washing I did, cleaning my entire body twice, I couldn’t rid myself of the intense longing. We were connected in a way that most couldn’t understand since I barely knew him. But the strong sense of urgency, the electric shock that tore through me when he was anywhere close had awakened something deep within me. It was like a fire that could never be doused with anything but gasoline.

  Even though the water was close to scalding, I was shivering all over from the astounding need for him. Just a single touch would never be enough. I was suddenly filled with adrenaline, allowing my fingers to slide off bubbles as I returned to the water. As I’d done before, I envisioned his dark eyes claiming my body even before he undressed me.

  Just the thought of him basking in my nakedness forced my pussy muscles to clamp and release several times. I rubbed the flat of my hand down my stomach, hesitating before allowing my index finger to rub my clit. Still shaking, I continued for a few seconds until I became disgusted with myself.

  How could I be thinking about sex when my parents were dead and my brother missing? Presumed a murderer, no less. Disgust rolled through me and I turned off the water, immediately grabbing a towel from the gold-plated towel bar.

  This was a rich man’s house, but what little I’d seen told me there was no longer the same love carried within the walls as when I’d been here before. Another tragedy just of another type. Maybe Dimitrios wasn’t capable of loving anyone.

  I dressed quickly, finding a comb and brush so I could detangle my hair. With no makeup in my purse other than lipstick, I had no choice but to confront him again without any on. The all-natural look. My guess was I wasn’t his type anyway. I bet he went for the dazzling princesses of the world.

  There was no reason to be nervous, but as soon as I tried the door and realized it was unlocked, I was suddenly extremely anxious. The way I felt about the man, the chaotic dichotomy of hatred and desire had become even more difficult to handle. My hands were clammy and I sucked down the entire rest of the glass of wine before I felt courageous enough to venture out of the room.

  I left the wine in my room but grabbed the tray, eager to thank the chef. Or at least I could use bringing the dirty dishes to the kitchen as an excuse for leaving my room.

  My mind wandered to the thought if he would punish me again for my terrible infractions.

  The entire house was quiet. That I hadn’t remembered either. But as I walked down the hall toward the stairs, certain details started to come back to me. The pictures on the hallway walls, some of family, and some of fabulous art were exactly as I remembered. Even the stair runner was the same.

  With every step, I could see more of the house. When I’d raced away before I’d had tunnel vision. Now I allowed myself to remember.

  And regret.

  What exactly for I wasn’t certain, but I had a feeling it would come to me the more time I spent with the man. By the time I reached the bottom of the stairs, I was certain no one else was in the house. I walked in bare feet, not making a sound, hoping my mind would remember the direction of the kitchen.

  I found it easily enough, the setting of the room exactly as I remembered, but the appliances had been replaced with a dark granite shade, the cabinets refaced and even the granite countertop was a brighter color than before. The space was beautiful, but there were no flowers on the table or pictures on the walls. I didn’t see a single kitchen towel or a bowl of fruit anywhere.

  Everything was in its place, the fragrance of vanilla and apple, not a pot pie that couldn’t have come out of the oven more than forty-five minutes ago.

  Maybe there was a second kitchen meant for staff. I placed the tray on the counter, searching for a trashcan and a dishwasher. I’d never felt so awkward in a space. Even the dishwasher was empty, but I placed the plate and fork inside anyway.

  “I have staff to do that.” His deep, velvet voice sent a shower of tingles through me, my core heated to the point of eruption. I was suddenly breathless, clenching my fists together to avoid saying anything that would set him off.