“Dammit.” He growled and balled his hands into fists. Ra clenched his jaw and tried to focus on the bond that linked them, hoping he could somehow connect with her. He thought if he could just have that—a small piece of her—then he could do what needed to be done without feeling the soul-crushing guilt of betraying not only the light elementals but his best friends as well.

  “Ra.” A musical voice caused his head to snap up. Mother Gaia stood before him. She wore a dress that represented all seasons, with green leaves draping down one shoulder, fall leaves on the other, morphing into spring flowers, and then what looked like a layer of snow wrapped around her legs. A train of powder and flakes cascaded off the dress like a frozen waterfall. Her long, white, wavy hair glistened in the fading sunlight that shone behind her, making her appear to glow. Or perhaps, Ra thought, she was simply glowing from within.

  Ra immediately bowed his head. “Mother Gaia.” Awe filled him, followed quickly by shame because he knew she would be aware of all that he had done.

  “You have been through much, Ra Nasir.” Her voice warmed him in the cold places that had taken up residency inside his soul. “You have choices before you that seem impossible. Conflicts that seem to have no solutions. And still you have not given up.

  “I often hear from my children, Why must I endure this?’” She paused, and Ra heard her dress rustling. He looked up and saw she’d moved closer. “I ask in return, ‘Why shouldn’t you endure this?’ Why should anything worth having in this life be easy? How much more joy, love, contentment, and peace will you have if you must fight for them?”

  Ra swallowed hard. “What if I fail? What if I don’t get what I’ve been fighting for?” His head dropped once more.

  “Then you hurt. You weep for what you have lost,” she said gently. “You let yourself mourn and then you use your experience to help others. You take comfort from those who have had time to heal from their own losses. Then, one by one, you rise from the ashes of the fire that burned you down.” He felt a hand on his head, and peace flowed into him. His muscles relaxed, and air filled his lungs. “Ra, this life is filled with so much pain, but it is also filled with an equal measure of joy. There comes a point when you must choose that joy even in the midst of your pain.”

  His shoulders shook. All the fear Ra had been attempting to keep in check broke free. He was man enough to admit that sometimes tears were necessary. Tears ran down his face and dropped to the ground. “And”—he took a deep breath, attempting to keep his voice from shaking as he spoke—“what if the choice I have made will bring others pain? What if I am the cause of their loss of joy?” Of all people to learn of his betrayal, it just had to be the earth goddess.

  “There will be consequences.” Her voice was firm, and he felt her hand move away. “There are repercussions, good and bad, for every decision made. Sometimes choices made that have initial negative effects can cause a ripple of good things to happen. That doesn’t mean that the choice was the right one. Regardless, the choice cannot be unmade. Therefore, you must follow to completion the path you have started.

  “The question is, are you going to ask for my help? Are you going to accept that how I help is not necessarily the way in which you hoped help would come?”

  He nodded his head against his hands where his forehead rested. “Okay,” he whispered. “Okay.” There was peace in surrendering his wrongdoing to the goddess. Though he understood the plans he’d begun couldn’t be stopped, and there would be repercussions for his choices, his heart beat a little less rapidly, and his breathing came a little easier. “Thank you.”

  “It will get harder before it gets easier, warrior,” she said. “Call on me. Lean on those who care for you. And be prepared to make sacrifices. This will define your character. Not one choice. But many.”

  Ra knew she was gone when the warmth that surrounded him disappeared. He continued to sit with his head bowed and took deep breaths, slowly regaining composure.

  He had no idea what Viscious would ask of him, but Ra knew that in order to get Shelly back from the underworld, he had no choice but to comply. Ra pushed to his feet, deciding there was no point in waiting twenty-four hours to give the dark fire king his answer. The sooner Ra agreed, then the sooner he could gain entrance into hell.

  He lifted his hand to open a portal, but before the air even shifted, just to his left, another portal appeared. Elias, Tara, Liam, and Gabby came through.

  “Told ya he’d be here.” Liam walked over and placed a hand on Ra’s shoulder, giving it a tight squeeze. “You can’t hide from us, brother. We know you too well.”

  Ra glanced at the others and then looked back at Liam. “How many other places did you check first?”

  “That’s not important,” Liam said at the same time that Gabby said, “Five.”

  “It took you six tries to find me because you know me so well?” Ra asked dryly.

  “The point is, we did find you.” Liam said.

  “No.” Tara shook her head. “What’s important is that you’re okay.” She took a step toward him, and her lips pressed together. “I’m sorry I slapped you.” She lowered her head and then looked up at him through her lashes. “Shelly wouldn’t do anything to hurt you. It’s just not who she is.”

  “I know,” Ra said. “And I shouldn’t jump to conclusions. I have some pieces to the puzzle, but not the whole thing.”

  Tara nodded. “So, are you okay? Because you jumped into a portal that didn’t give us a clue as to where you’d gone.” She took another step closer. “Shelly will not be pleased if she comes back to find you have done something stupid.”

  Ra nearly laughed. If that was the case, then his soul bonded was going to be beyond pissed.

  “What?” Elias said quickly. “What was that look?”

  Ra schooled his features, surprised he’d shown any emotion. He rarely had a problem keeping his emotions and thoughts from his face when he wanted to be unreadable. But Elias was one of his best friends. He, like his other brothers by choice, had been around long enough that if they’d paid attention, they would see the tiny movements on his face that others missed.

  “What are you talking about?” Ra asked.

  Elias shook his head. “Don’t do that. You can bullshit other people, Ra, but not us.”

  Ra seriously felt like he might throw up. In all the time he’d known them, Ra had never done anything that could cause them harm.

  “You might as well tell us.” Gabby folded her arms across her chest. “I mean, I realize you and I don’t know each other real well, but I promise I won’t judge you. This—” She motioned to their group and then to the surrounding area. Gabby whistled when she looked out over the ledge, seeming to realize for the first time that they were on a mountain. “Okay, that is one hell of a drop.”

  “Gabby, focus,” Tara admonished. “You were doing good there for a minute.”

  “That was before I realized a few steps to my left is a fall that will cause my body to bend in all sorts of unnatural ways if I decide to take a plunge.”

  Tara frowned and placed her hands on her hips. “Why on earth would you worry about taking a plunge off of a mountain? It’s not like we would let you walk off.”

  “I’m bonded to this guy.” Gabby pointed to Liam. “Sometimes a ledge looks appealing.”

  Tara stared at the redhead for a minute, then nodded. “Fair enough. But I won’t let you plunge no matter how annoying your man gets.” She motioned to Ra. “Now, continue with your speech. He was about to break.”

  Liam shook his head. “He wasn’t about to break.”

  “He was,” Tara argued.

  “Sorry, luv,” Elias said. “Ra’s a steel trap when he wants to be.”

  Ra simply watched the group argue. The longer they kept this up, the longer he could stall and attempt to come up with something to tell them other than the awful truth.

  “As I was saying,” Gabby said loudly, interrupting all other conversation, “this is a judgment-free mountain. You can tell us all your deep, dark secrets. Judging by those dark circles around your eyes, your secrets are eating away at you.” She pointed to his face. “Which seems to happen when you start getting super emotional.” She paused and held out her arms with her palms up. “We’ve all got skeletons, Ra. Some are still decomposing and stink worse than others, but they all have the same ending.”

  “Okay, didn’t see the pep talk going that direction,” Tara muttered.

  “What’s the ending?” Ra asked. Despite the female’s flippant words, her tone of voice was pleading. The compassion in her eyes made him curious.

  Gabby shrugged and slipped her hands into her front pockets. “The smell ends because the rotting is over. Eventually, you’re left with something that, though still dead, is much less messy. Because, let’s be honest, a rotting corpse is just gross. But once it gets down to the bones, you can deal with the skeleton without getting your hands any dirtier than they were. You can move forward by picking the skeleton up and taking it out of the closet, and you don’t even have to use gloves.”

  “You should definitely still use gloves,” Tara muttered. The group was quiet for a moment before Tara continued. “That was a convoluted mess, but I think we all get what you’re saying.”

  Liam held up his hand and shook his head. “Nope. I’m clueless. I mean, babe, how many dead bodies have you handled? Should I be concerned?”

  “That’s not really what’s important,” Gabby said.

  “Pretty sure it’s fairly important.” Liam held up his hands. “I mean, if you’ve got some awesome way to conceal dead bodies, then I’ve got a list of names that could use your expertise.”

  Elias shook his head and snapped his fingers at the couple. “I think we’ve gotten a bit off topic.” He stepped directly in front of Ra. Elias’s eyes swirled a vibrant green while Ra watched his friend struggle to keep his emotions in check. “Mate, what the hell is going on? Just tell us.”

  Ra clenched his jaw and took a slow breath. He considered the best way to tell them, but there really was no good way. Better to just get it out there and deal with the fallout. “I made a deal with Viscious,” he said, his voice low. “He can get me into the underworld.”

  Ra didn’t look away from Elias as he spoke. He looked him dead in the eyes.

  “Okay, I did not see that coming.” Liam sighed, drawing Ra’s attention. He watched as Liam ran a hand through his hair and then bobbed his head side to side as if he needed to loosen his neck muscles. Ra understood the feeling. Every muscle in his own body had been drawn tight since watching Shelly disappear with Osiris.

  “Viscious?” Tara asked.

  “The dark fire king,” Gabby offered. Her eyes danced with flames as she stared at Ra. Her shoulders stiff and her hands clenched into fists at her sides.

  “What deal did you make?” Elias asked. “What did that wanker want?”

  “A favor.” Ra slipped his hands into the pockets of his cargo pants and rolled his shoulders back. “At a time of his choosing, if he requests my help, I must answer. No questions asked. I will give him my word.”

  “Wait.” Gabby’s eyes narrowed. “You said give, not gave. Does that mean you haven’t made the deal yet?”

  “I’m going to him now.” Ra held up his hand as each of them opened their mouths to refute him. “If I do not accept the deal, he will kill me, or at least try. And you know how powerful he is.”

  “No.” Elias growled and swiped a hand through the air. “This is not happening. We will figure out a different way. Rory and—”

  “There is no other way!” Ra bellowed. The shocked looks on their faces, eyes wide and mouths dropped open, would have been comical if not for the circumstances. Ra rarely raised his voice. He rarely lost control. But with every second that passed, he felt as if Shelly was getting farther and farther away from him. Whatever it was inside of him that was causing his eyes to turn black continued to get stronger. He could feel it spreading like mold on an apple. How much longer until his rot affected those around him?

  “I will get her back, and I don’t care about the price. I’m not saying this decision is right, but it is what I will do.” He looked at Liam and then Elias. “She is mine. She is my heart, my soul, my life’s breath. Without her, there is nothing. No color, no light, no peace. I am simply existing. I cannot live like this, and I cannot let her go.” He dropped his eyes and whispered, “I am sorry, brothers.”

  There was no sound as they stood there on the mountain. Ra waited. Despite what Gabby had said about there being no judgment, he knew that willingly siding with their enemy deserved judgment.

  “I would do the same thing, mate,” Elias said, breaking the tense silence. “If it was Tara, I would burn the world to the ground.”

  “Damn straight,” Liam agreed. “Gabby would be breaking legs to get me back.”

  Liam’s words cut through the tension, and they all chuckled. Even Ra couldn’t help but smile. He looked up at them. “I really am sorry.”

  “Don’t be.” Tara took Elias’s hand in hers. “Gabby told the truth when she said no judgment. We’re with you, Ra. But before you go bake cookies with the dark side, could you give us a minute to fill you in on some things? Then maybe—” She held up her hand to stop him when he started to open his mouth. “Wait. I’m not saying we’re going to try to stop you. I’m just saying give us a little time. Can you do that?”

  Ra looked at her and then the others. Their eyes each held an earnest plea, voicing the same thought. Finally, he nodded. “What do you have?”

  “Dragons.” Liam raised his hands and flared them out like fireworks, emphasizing the word. “We got dragons.”

  “Maybe,” Gabby quickly added.

  “Probably.” Tara held out her hand and waved it quickly from side to side. “Fifty-fifty chance.”

  Ra looked at Elias. “Is this why Aston and his female aren’t with you?”

  Elias’s lips pressed tightly together, and he gave a sharp nod. “They’ve gone to petition the dragons for help. Rory, apparently, has their favor.”

  The revelation piqued Ra’s interest, enough that he was willing to use more of his twenty-four hours in order to hear what his friends had to say. Ra inwardly huffed. Dragons, why didn’t I think of that? He slipped his hands from his pockets, sat back down on the ground, then motioned for the others to do the same. “Tell me everything.”

  Aston thought the need for Rory would abate once they completed their bond. Nope. If anything, his desire had grown stronger. Did he watch her shamelessly as she redressed? Yes, yes, he did.

  “Enjoying the view?” Rory had a smirk on her lovely face.

  “You could dress a little slower. I won’t complain.” Aston, already fully clothed, sat on a large rock with one ankle resting on his bent knee. He clasped his hands and rested them in his lap. Though he still craved her, the urgency he’d felt before had indeed subsided. He no longer felt that if he didn’t bond their magic, then she’d slip from his hands. That idea had been screaming in his head from the moment he’d laid eyes on her outside the burning house. Now, his soul rested, as if completely content.

  She rolled her eyes and slipped her shirt over her head, then pulled her long hair from underneath the collar. “Well, you don’t look like you’re going to rip my clothes off, so I’m guessing the bedroom eyes on your face now are just the normal desire a guy feels for his woman. Does that mean you won’t be pawing at me while we talk to the dragon king? Because that could get distracting, probably for everyone present.”

  “I can behave”—he paused and then shrugged—“as long as we’re in the company of others. When we’re alone, all bets are off.”

  She shook her head, but there was a light red blush on her cheeks. “Then I better get us some company ASAP. Kimba.” She called out the dragon’s name and then walked to the entrance of the cave. Aston joined her and stared out over the snow-covered landscape. Less than a minute later, the gigantic dragon hovered in front of them.

  “Well, I guess congratulations are in order.” Kimba’s teeth showed in a dragon smile. The sight was a little disturbing. “I can see the bond between you, and it’s strong and complete. Also, thank you for finishing up your study of each other’s anatomies and for being fully clothed.”

  “Kimba!” Rory hissed through clenched teeth.

  “I’ve never beat around the tree. You can’t expect me to change now.”

  “It’s beat around the bush, you crazy, flying lizard.” Rory pressed her hand to her forehead and closed her eyes briefly.

  “Not for a dragon. Bushes are much too low to the ground for our wings to beat around. We definitely need trees for that.”

  “I don’t think that phrase means what you think it does.” Aston could not hide his grin. He had to admit, Kimba was a trip to be around.

  “She has no idea of the meaning of most of the phrases she uses,” Rory said dryly. “Enough about Kimba’s lack of human vernacular. We need to see the dragon king … like yesterday. It’s really important.”

  Kimba snorted. “It must be if you’ve decided to put your human hormones momentarily on hold to have this conversation.” She moved toward them, and Aston grabbed Rory’s arm and pulled her back. Kimba set down on the edge of the cave opening and lowered her wings. Aston called on the wind to raise them up and move them onto the dragon’s back. He sat Rory in front of him.

  “How long are you going to tease me about that?” Rory asked.

  “For as long as it amuses me and annoys you. And since you’re so easily annoyed, I imagine it will be quite a long time.”