After all the atrocities she'd seen the Order commit, Tenia had come to realize the depth of their depravity. If the Order was any example, not only were supernatural beings not superior to humans, but they were far inferior, capable of feats of evil the humans couldn't dream of. The supernatural races had too much power and too many willing to use it for their own gain, no matter the terrible consequences. Perhaps it would be better for everyone if the supernatural races no longer were allowed to leave their own realms. Then their evil could not put humans in danger.

  “I was such a fool.” She heard Skender’s words and the pain that filled them.

  We are all fools. She wished she could communicate to him through their bond. She could still feel the tether connecting them. Yet no matter how many times she tried to reach out to him, she was unsuccessful.

  Tenia pushed up from the bench and began to walk. She strolled in a large circle around the bench. Not because it was what she wanted, but because it was all she was allowed in this place that seemed to be holding her. Regardless of which direction she tried to go, her body was forced to turn, pushed by an invisible hand, back toward the bench. She could see the dense forest beyond the small field surrounding the bench, but it was out of reach. Her imprisonment began as an irritation, but it was quickly becoming maddening.

  Her thoughts veered toward Myanin, and Tenia wondered how her unlikely friend was doing. If she knew Myanin at all, she would guess the djinn was probably ticked off she'd lost her primary source of cotton candy. The thought made her smile, but it also brought pain to her heart. Would she ever see Myanin again? How long would she be in this stasis? Tenia felt fingers run across her cheek and knew it was Skender touching her. She felt her hand being squeezed by a much smaller one and pictured the worried face of her son. Her stomach clenched as tears ran down her face. Tenia wondered, not for the first time, if death, real death, would be better than being so close to the two males she loved deeply but being unable to reciprocate their affections.

  Perhaps this was her punishment for the part she’d played in assisting the Order: to forever hear and feel her son and mate but never be able to reach out to them.

  “Patience.” The Great Luna’s voice filled her mind. “It is one of the greatest disciplines a person can learn, and yet it is also one of the most difficult to practice.”

  “Why?” Tenia asked. “Why must I be patient? What purpose do I serve simply existing without being able to help others?”

  “Sometimes, the answer is simply ‘because I said so’,” the goddess answered. “You are the created, Tenia. I am your creator, and I love you in a way that your finite mind cannot begin to comprehend. It is not for you to know my plans. Simply trust that I always have your best interest at heart.”

  Faith, Tenia thought. Her creator was asking for Tenia to exercise faith and patience. Faith required her to simply believe despite not being able to see the outcome. And patience was only possible if she set her own desires aside and waited for something to happen that was beyond her control. Could she do it? Tenia sighed. “What other choice do I have?” she asked the empty forest around her. There was no response from the Great Luna, though there was a measure of peace that filled her as she accepted her circumstances.

  Tenia resumed her place on the bench and focused on the voices outside of her body. Voices that were precious to her. For now, simply hearing them would have to be enough.

  Chapter

  Seven

  “So many good things in life start with pain. The birth of a child, getting out of an abusive relationship, going through treatment to recover from an illness, even death. I have experienced so many things that felt like I wouldn’t survive … yet I did. I have learned through the trials that the resulting joy is so much deeper because of the anguish. I must keep reminding myself of this—and those I love—so that we will stay strong through the pain.” ~Jacque

  If this is what hell is like, Jacque thought as her body continued to burn, then count me out. She could still hear the voices around her, but she couldn't see anyone.

  Jen was pissed as ever. “What is the point of you being a historian if you don’t know a lick of history?”

  “He’s doing the best he can, Jen.” Zara’s voice was calm yet sharp. “I don't think your griping is going to make him discover a solution any faster.”

  Jacque heard Jen sigh. “I know. It’s just so hard to see her in pain. She’s stopped screaming, but her body is so rigid she looks like she would shatter with even the slightest touch. I just want to do something.”

  “We all want to help.” Myanin’s voice broke in. “Sometimes helping is just being present.”

  Jacque could imagine the look Jen was giving the djinn, but her friend stayed silent. It had been three days, or that was the last number she’d heard someone mention as her friends, pack, and family attempted to heal her injuries and undo … whatever it was that the werewolf had done to her heart. She was tired, she wanted to hold her son, and she wanted to stare into the blue eyes of her mate. As she thought of those things, she knew the torment she was enduring would eventually pass. And all of her sufferings would be worth the blessings experienced on the other side.

  “You will do those things, Luna.” Fane’s voice filled her mind. He’d kept their bond open wide and attempted to take some of her pain away, pulling it into his own body, but Jacque didn’t want him to weaken himself in any way. “Stop worrying about me,” he chastised. An open bond meant no privacy. “The Great Luna will provide the strength I need. You and our son are always my first responsibility, no matter what.”

  Jacque wasn’t about to argue with him. She knew it would be pointless. And she didn't have the strength to anyway. So she focused inward on the healers' power she felt streaming into her body. The harder she focused, the more she could see their light, their magic. It moved through her body, healing everything it came in contact with, from the smallest muscle strain to the grisly damage done to her heart. Jacque took a deep breath and realized the burning was beginning to abate.

  “Fane, it’s working,” she told him as the flames began to subside, and the sensation of heat weakened until she was once again in a state of blissful warmth.

  “Open your eyes, Jacquelyn,” he commanded.

  “Pipe down, wolf-man. Give a girl a moment to get her bearings.” Jacque experimented with telling her limbs to move. She felt her feet flex and then her fingers tap on the bed she laid on. Then she took another deep breath and let it out slowly. The room fell silent, but that didn’t last long.

  “She’s moving,” Jen said, her voice sounding strangled as if she was trying to keep from crying. “Open your eyes, Red, or so help me, I will pry them open and use toothpicks to keep them that way.”

  “Wow, and I thought I had anger issues,” Myanin said.

  Jacque ignored the rest of the voices as chatter broke out around her. She focused on her body. She was almost afraid to move too much, for fear the pain would return. After what felt like several minutes with her heart pounding in her throat, she began to move her eyes, then slowly opened them. With a pathetic yelp, she immediately slammed her eyelids shut.

  “The lights,” Fane said. He'd felt her pain through the bond at the brightness of the lights. She heard a click and then sensed darkness behind her closed lids. “Try again, Luna.”

  Jacque opened her eyes slowly, squinting to make sure she wouldn’t be blinded again. When she was certain the room was comfortably dim, she opened them the rest of the way. The first thing she saw was her mate’s face, which was hovering a few inches above her own. His hands framed her cheeks, and he leaned down until his forehead rested against hers. Fane took a deep breath, and Jacque felt his wolf settle as her scent filled his body.

  “Never again, mate,” he whispered, his lips brushing against hers. “I would hide you and Slate away far from all of this if I didn’t know that you would never forgive me. I love you.” Jacque didn’t have time to respond because his lips were suddenly pressed firmly against hers. It wasn’t a gentle kiss. Despite her recent injuries, he wasn’t treating her as if she was a porcelain doll. It was a kiss to remind them both that they were okay, that they would make it through this. His tongue brushed against her lips, and Jacque opened her mouth, giving him what he wanted. Her body filled with a different kind of heat, this time pleasant. Very pleasant.

  The bed beside her dipped, and she felt Fane settle his chest against her. One of his hands threaded his fingers through her hair. She shamelessly moaned when he gave a gentle tug, forcing her head back and her mouth higher for him to deepen the kiss. Her arms lifted, and Jacque wrapped her hands around his arms and slowly ran them up and over his firm biceps to his strong shoulders until they cupped his neck. His skin was hot, and she could feel the pulse of his heart in the artery beneath her hand.

  “It beats for you,” he said through their bond as his mouth continued to work its magic. She felt as if his lips were assaulting hers, and she was all too happy to let him continue.

  “I prefer to think of it as devouring, not assaulting,” he said, having picked up on her thoughts through their bond.

  Jacque smiled. “Whatever it is, I don’t want you to stop.”

  She felt his wolf rumble, and his body press harder against her. “Wasn’t planning on it.”

  Jacque sighed, sinking into the mattress as she tried to pull him further onto the bed. She wanted more. His taste was driving her crazy. She mentally urged him on. His hand moved from her face to her neck, then began to slide down her collarbone. Her skin tingled in its wake, and the slightest movement from him made her shiver.

  “Unless you two want to show us how to make a baby, you might want to hit the pause button on this, admittedly, very hot make-out session.” Jen’s voice sounded as if it was coming from far away.

  “Make her go away,” Jacque said into his mind as she began to pull at his shirt.

  Fane pulled his mouth back long enough to growl, “Everyone out.” Then his lips were right back on hers.

  “What the hell is going on?” A deep voice rumbled. Jacque couldn’t place who it was and frankly didn’t care.

  “What? What am I missing?” She recognized that voice as Heather’s.

  “I can lead you over there and let you feel what’s going on,” Jen said. “It’s getting really interesting. The shirt is about to come off.”

  There was a loud sigh. “Jacque, unless you want Jen to get to see your man naked, you might want to stop.”

  Sally’s words penetrated her lust-fogged brain. “Fane, we have an audience.” she reminded him. She released him and then grabbed his roaming hand, even though she was quite okay with the road trip it was on. Her mate didn’t seem inclined to stop, even as Jacque tried to pull her face from his. Jacque snapped her face to the side, and his mouth simply moved to her cheek, heading toward her neck. Then Jacque met the eyes of her mother, who was still sitting in the same place she had been when they’d all started their attempt at healing. “Wow, this is awkward,” she muttered before shoving at Fane’s shoulder. “Nissa—” Jacque gasped as her mate bit gently on her mate mark. She recovered and continued. “Since Peri isn’t here to do the honors, could you please zap my mate?”

  The high fae stepped into Jacque’s line of sight, and her lips turned up into a small smile. “Everyone might want to back up,” she told the room as she laid her hand on Fane’s back. There was a flash of light and then Fane snarled. He jumped to his feet and swung around to look at the room. Jacque noticed he made sure that she was behind him.

  Jacque leaned to the side and saw that Nissa had her hands up. “I meant no harm, Alpha,” she said, her voice calm. “But your mate wanted to get your attention. And I've never been one to ignore an alpha female in distress.”

  "She was not in distress," he ground out. "Far from it." His breathing began to slow, and he straightened from the fighting crouch he’d taken, though he continued to give Nissa a death glare.

  The high fae only raised her eyebrows and shrugged.

  “Fane,” Jacque said, reaching out to grab his hand. She gave it a squeeze.

  He looked over his shoulder at her, and his face softened. “This is not over.”

  She laughed as the rest of the room groaned.

  “Noted,” she said, and then glanced around at all of the women who had helped heal her. She met each of their eyes, and tears filled her own. “Thank you,” Jacque said. “You all must be exhausted. Thank you for being willing to fight for me.”

  “That’s what pack does.” Sally reached over and patted her hand.

  Jacque’s eyes widened. She tried to sit up as she turned her hand to grip Sally’s. “Your baby?”

  Sally smiled. “Is just fine.”

  “You shouldn’t have taken that risk. And I was so selfish not to think of it before.” She would never forgive herself if something happened to Sally’s child because Sally had overexerted herself trying to heal her.

  “You’re my best friend, Jacque.”

  “I’m right here, you know?” Jen interrupted.

  “Yes.” Sally rolled her eyes. “We always know where you are, Jen, because you can’t keep your trap shut.”

  There was a pause and then Jen said, “Fair enough. Carry on.”

  “Do you think Costin would have let me do this if he thought for a second that it would hurt me or our child?” Sally asked.

  The man in question stepped up beside her and smiled a dimpled grin at Jacque. “Glad to see you’re better, Alpha. And you know the answer to that question. But you also know that you females generally do whatever you damn well please. Our job is mainly to try and lessen the damage.”

  Jacque blinked, and she made sure her face remained blank of all emotion. “I have no idea what you’re talking about.”

  Fane finally relaxed and sat back down on the bed, though closer now to the foot as if he was attempting to resist temptation. He chuckled. “Sure you don’t. You’re also a terrible liar.”

  The tension in the room was beginning to evaporate, and Jacque pulled her legs up, folding them, and resting her arms on her knees. She glanced around the room. “I’ve been out of it for three days, correct? That’s what I heard someone say while I was unconscious.”

  “That’s correct,” Lilly said. “And speaking of you being out of it, what was happening that caused you so much pain?”

  “I felt like I was being burned from the inside out,” she said and then waved her hand at her mom. Lilly’s mouth opened and her eyebrows raised so high they nearly touch her hair line. “But that’s not important.” Jacque turned her head to her mate. “You need to get back to the hunt with Nick and the others.” Then she looked at Jen. “Will you bring me Slate?”

  “On it.” Jen nodded. “He’s been with Bethany and Drake. He’s getting a crash course on how to take care of more than one child and keep them alive.”

  Jacque’s eyes widened. “That’s not encouraging.”

  Jen simply waved over her shoulder as she exited.

  Jacque looked around the room until her eyes found Myanin. “I believe, before I became a human barbeque, we were working on figuring out Peri's little riddle. Have you made any progress?”

  Myanin blinked several times before she answered. “Did you forget the part where you were burning like a barbecue? There hasn’t been a whole lot going on other than making sure the healers were taken care of while they worked on you. And keeping that blonde psycho from stabbing everyone for, well, any reason she could come up with.”

  Jacque bit her lip and then sighed. “Jen can be a little overbearing.”

  “She’s psycho,” Myanin said dryly.

  “I’m going to have to agree with her.” Heather pointed at Myanin. Though she couldn’t see the djinn, the healer was extremely adroit at knowing where people were based on the sounds they made. “Although I do adore her. It’s hard not to love her crazy just a bit. It’s something to aspire to, ya know?”

  Jacque couldn’t help but laugh as everyone said in unison, “No!”

  “All right, we’ve wasted enough time,” Jacque said, pulling herself together. “Let’s get to work on this riddle.”

  Fane shifted, causing her attention to fall back on him. “Why are you still here? Nick needs you.”

  “And I will go help him after you are taken care of.”

  Jacque started to speak but snapped her mouth shut when he gave her a stern look.

  “You need a shower, you need to eat, and you need to spend some time with Slate. The others can work on the riddle while you do those things. And I need just a little more time with my mate after the three days you’ve endured.” He looked over at the sprite queen. “Do you have a place where I can see to my mate?”

  Andora nodded. “I’ll show you to your room. We’ve assigned everyone a place to stay.”

  “Thank you, Andora,” Fane said, sincerity evident in his voice. “Your hospitality will not be forgotten.”

  The alpha stood and scooped Jacque into his arms. “She will be back in a little while,” he told them. Andora headed for the door and Fane followed.

  Jacque glanced over his shoulder, looking at each of the women who had helped her. “Thank you, again.”

  They’d just stepped out of the entrance to the room when Jen came around the corner with Slate in her arms. “Are you two sure you’re going to give the crumb catcher your full attention and not start clawing each other's clothes off?”

  Jacque held her arms out for Slate. He clapped and grinned and then reached for her. “I think we can restrain ourselves.” Jacque nuzzled against her son’s cheek and breathed in his precious scent. She’d missed him fiercely.

  Jen’s eyes softened, and she placed a hand on Jacque’s cheek. “I’m in agreement with your mate, Red. Never do that again. You’re my ride-or-die chick.”

  Jacque’s eyes filled with tears as she patted Jen’s hand. “Ditto.”

  Jen dropped her hand and stepped aside so Fane could walk past. When she looked back at Jen, she saw her friend still staring at them, wiping at the tears streaming down her face. Jen was tough as nails, but she was also fragile, and sometimes it was easy to forget that she needed to know how much she was loved. Jacque held her blonde best friend’s stare until Fane turned a corner and she could no longer see her.