He nodded. “I get it. I mean, I don’t, but I do.”

  I kneeled before them on the grass.

  “I’ve just recently got my memories back. I’m not the same Zoe from Chicago. I’m different. Changed. I’m going to be doing things you may not always agree with. You may even hate me for them at first. But when it’s all said and done, it’s all to save the Tree. Humanity. I know this’ll be hard for all of you, except maybe Julian. He’s been around a year or two.”

  Julian pushed out his fist and prodded a fist bump, to which I gladly accepted.

  “But for the rest of you, this will be hard as hell. A lesson in trust. In me. Sometimes we’re forced to do things we don’t want to do. But it’s all for a reason, and when it’s time to be revealed, it will be. I can only ask you trust me. In my leadership. In Genesis.”

  I stood and leaned back against the altar behind me. “I know it’s hard, and I wouldn’t ask if it weren’t necessary.”

  “I’ll do what I can.” Remie stood. “If I don’t, Phoebe will kill me.”

  I laughed. “Yeah, probably.”

  Rainah sat beside Julian, chewing on her nails.

  Julian stared at her, trying to hear her thoughts, no doubt.

  “I know I miss stepped with you two, Rainah. I didn’t remember my duty, my responsibilities. But I’m here now. And if you need anything, you can always come to me.”

  “Yeah, okay.” She sighed. “I just want Micah home. It doesn’t feel right without him.”

  “We’ll do what we can. But in the end, it’s not our choice.” I sighed. “It’s his.”

  She scoffed. “I don’t like it, but I understand.”

  “Okay then.” I clapped my hands together. “I have missions to tend to. Things are going to get rough for a while. I need you all to work hard. To train. Remie, you’re going to be partnered with Julian and Rainah for the time being, until we can get you a more permanent partner.”

  “I wish it was Phoebe.” He sighed.

  “I know. I’m going to New York tomorrow to follow some leads on Samael and Lilith. I’ll keep tabs on Phoebe for now, and once Raz thinks you’re sufficiently trained, he’ll send you to me to keep watch over Phoebe. We’ll likely have you and your partner stationed there. Whomever your partner is, will be roomies with you though, hope that doesn’t interfere in newlywed business.”

  Julian laughed. “Damn, boss lady. You really are back, you dirty bird.”

  I shook my head.

  “How’s it going out here?” Raz and Cade moved up the path toward us.

  “I think we’re all on the same page now. They’ve been instructed to train with you, no missions until they’re ready. Then in a week or so, I want Remie to come to New York. In the mean time, find him a partner, someone permanent who can relocate.”

  Raz bowed.

  Cade put his arm around my waist and pulled me toward him. “Ready to call it a day?” He leaned over and kissed my cheek. “Things are about to go to hell very quickly.”

  “You have no idea.”

  We walked home, and I spent an hour or so packing things for my trip.

  Cade came in while I sat on my bed, taking deep breaths, mentally preparing for what lay ahead.

  “Are you ready?” Cade picked up my bags and stood by the door.

  “Almost.” I patted the comforter for Journey to come see me. She wasn’t used to me being gone so long.

  My phoenix moved closer, nuzzling up to my cheek, and cooed at me.

  “You take care of things around here while I’m gone, understand?”

  She nodded, rubbing up into my neck.

  “Okay.” I stood. “Let’s do this.”

  “Sure I can’t come along?” Cade asked. “I promise to behave.” He grinned.

  “I wish.” I moved toward the door. “But the Newborns need you here to train them.”

  “I understand. Please, stay safe.”

  “I will. Get Remie trained first, then give me a heads up, and I’ll let you know when it’s time. Timing on this is crucial.”

  He nodded.

  “You can come visit after trainings if you like. But I need some warning first.” I pointed at him. “Don’t just drop in on me, you may not like what you see.”

  “That doesn’t make me feel any better.” He crossed his arms over his chest.

  “It wasn’t meant to.” I smacked him on his ass. “I’ll be safe. I have my dagger, and I’m back in full form, so no training needed. I can hear you—” I glared, listening to his internal smartass coming through.

  He smirked. “Good.”

  I tugged at his hips and pulled him to me. “This is the easy part, blue eyes. Trust me.”

  “I really dislike being out of the fold.”

  “I know, and if there was anything I could do to avoid it, I would. Please, just keep in mind what I said. It’s still me, even though I may not act like it. I need you to play along, too. Play the part better than you ever have before. The dark factions are watching. Understood?”

  “You mean—”

  “Just play along. Call me out on things if you want, just be honest. Once I leave here, this moment, everything has to change.”

  Cade wrapped his arms around my waist, pulling me closer.

  I laid my cheek on his chest and closed my eyes, listening to his heart strum beneath me. His heart slowed and synced with mine, and just for a moment, probably the last for some time to come, I was at peace.

  “I’ll do as you ask. Just please, don’t withhold things any longer than you have to.”

  I lifted from his chest and pinched his chin between my fingers.

  “Trust in me, bello ragazzo.” I whispered. “I love you, blue eyes.”

  ~

  “Good to see you, Zoe.”

  I sat drinking cappuccinos with Phoebe in the front room of her home in Connecticut.

  “So you graduate in a few months. Excited?”

  She smiled. “Oh, yeah. I have a job interview too, did I tell you?”

  “Really?” I sat back, pulling my knees into my chest.

  “Yeah. Madie’s social worker loved what I did with the kids at the hospital, and they want me to work there full-time. So while Remie is off saving humanity, I’ll be here saving the kids.”

  Phoebe was so adorable. A beautiful soul.

  “So, what are you going to do about Micah?”

  “At this point, nothing.” I shrugged. “If he chooses to defect and stay there with Lahnie, there’s not much I can do.”

  She frowned. “I just wonder if his childhood had been better, if maybe this whole thing would’ve turned out differently.”

  “I don’t know.” I pulled my hair up, pushing it off my shoulder. “Mine wasn’t perfect, but I’d never give up on my family.”

  “No, but your situation is different.” She narrowed her eyes.

  “How so? We both have immortal duties to humanity. I gave up my life but it’s okay he’s not willing to?”

  “You have a point, but it’s Micah. He’s not the Eternal Mother. He’s just an Eternal.”

  “You obviously don’t know the whole situation. Has Remie told you?”

  “Told me what?”

  “The Gemini Doctrine. It’s void.”

  “Yeah?” She sat expressionless, like it was no big deal.

  “Yeah?” I raised my eyebrows. “That’s it?”

  “This means you don’t have to be reborn.” She shrugged. “What does it have to do with Micah?”

  “It means this Eternal Doctrine has been enacted. And unless I match all the Genesis with their Gemini, and they Converge, the Tree is as good as dead.”

  She stared blankly at the wall across the room.

  “Phoebe?” I leaned over, staring at her blank expression. “Are you okay?”

  She nodded, setting her feet on the floor. She was quiet, and I wasn’t sure why.

  “You and Remie are safe, you know. I’m assuming you… you know, have sex?”

  “We already had this conversation.” She scoffed. She continued brooding, staring at the floor, arms crossed over her chest.

  “Okay, spill. What’s going on?” I sat straight.

  “I don’t know, maybe everything’s just getting to me.” She pushed herself back against the couch. “I don’t get to see Remie, hardly ever. You’ve morphed into this Zoe in hyper-drive. And I’m getting the weirdest vibes from you now.”

  “How so?”

  “I don’t know how to explain it, but I can tell you’re different. Not yourself. Like you’re pretending.”

  “Pretending?” I raised my eyebrows.

  Wow, I underestimated Phoebe’s empathic gifts. She saw right through my games, and I needed to come up with a better plan. Either get her on board or keep trying to play one over on her. It didn’t take long for me to figure out which one was the better option.

  “Things are just out of hand right now, that’s all.”

  “I wish there was more I could do. To help.”

  There’s my girl.

  “Actually, there might be. So, Sam Gaits. You know I’m recording a demo, right?”

  “Yeah?”

  “Well, he’s asked me to perform at a concert at Madison Square Garden. I’d be a guest performer.”

  “Really?” Her eyes glazed over. “For who?”

  I shrugged. “I’m not sure. It’ll only be one or two songs, but I’m looking at it as my farewell tour, so to speak. You know, because I ever had a hello tour.”

  She laughed. “That’s funny.”

  “Is it?”

  She nudged my shoulder. “I’m trying to get used to your mannerisms. You seem stronger. More at peace. A little intimidating, though.”

  “Hmm. Well, I am more settled, to a degree. But then, this whole situation is scaring the crap out of me. Hoping Micah and his girl do the dirty and Converge. And that there’s a loophole in the Doctrine, that as long as they’re together, it’s okay if Micah’s defected. I don’t know all the fine print yet.”

  “Is there a way to find out?”

  “I can ask Raz, sure he’d love to be of more use. Since I can’t talk to him about any of it.”

  “Yeah, that must be hard.” She sighed. “You can’t trust anybody, can you?”

  “I hope so.” I leaned in, picking up her hands. “You taught Zoe 2.0 about faith, Phoebe. You reminded her. Reminded me we have to believe in things we can’t see.”

  She stared at our hands and nodded.

  “I need you to believe in me.”

  She glanced up, her expression unreadable

  “You’re the most faithful person I’ve ever met. Deep down, I know you believe everything happens for a reason. And we’re never given more than we can handle. Right?”

  “I guess.” She narrowed her eyes, thinking through my words.

  “I’m asking all of you to trust me. Remember back in Chicago, how you admired Eve so much and tried to convince me I should accept the Eternal Sacrifice?”

  “Of course.” She straightened her shoulders.

  “Would you give me different advice now?”

  “No.”

  “If you were me, would you have chosen another path?”

  “No.”

  “Then I need you to trust me. When I make decisions regarding Genesis. Humanity and the Eternal realm. I need you to say you’ll trust my decisions. And know that for the past five thousand years, I’ve been making these decisions based on love. To defeat the darkness. These choices were never from a selfish place.”

  She nodded. “I understand. Remie said you talked to everyone. I know it’s probably going to be one of the hardest things you’ll ever do. Making choices for all humanity, even if they’re not popular or easy. I get that. I’ll do the best I can.”

  “I need you to stay strong, Phoebe. Don’t ever lose your faith. It’s your defining virtue, not your fatal flaw. Hold onto that, even when there’s nothing left to hold on to. Promise me.”

  She narrowed her eyes and stared at our hands, her ring was glowing, its protective barrier was raised around us.

  “What’s this ring doing?” She pursed her lips.

  “Did they teach you how to use it?”

  She shook her head.

  “Seriously?” I scoffed. “See? This is what happens when I’m gone for twenty-one years.” I rolled my eyes. “Lesson one. When it warms the skin around your finger, it’s telling you something. You’re safe and being protected around Eternals or in danger around strangers. Eternal equals good. Like the night I met Cade?”

  “Oh yeah.”

  “And if it heats up around someone who’s not, danger. Got it?”

  She nodded.

  “And if you need to protect yourself, this will grow a safety shield around you, no one can penetrate it if you want them out. It’ll take strong magic to let them in. Say, Et arma. It’s sheilds up in Latin.”

  “Et Arma,” she repeated, and the glowing bubble rose around us.

  “And to let it down, say, Arma descendit.”

  “Arma descendit.”

  “Perfect. Now practice.” I got to my feet and moved across the room.

  “Et Arma.” The shimmering shield rose around her.

  I stepped up and pushed through the barrier.

  “Hey, why’d it let you through?”

  “Because I’m not a threat.” I nughed her shoulder. “That’s how you’ll know. It’s a smart ring.” I wiggled my eyebrows.

  “Arma descendit.”

  The sheild came down immediately.

  “Your ring has become one with you, yoda. Gabrielle did an awesome job on it. And it’s so pretty.”

  I held it up, staring at the glowing stone in the center, holding it in my hand. Phoebe’s hands were so tiny, and she had such soft skin.

  I blew out a breath.

  “Are you okay?” She pursed her lips.

  I had to be careful with Phoebe. There wasn’t much I could pull over on an empath as strong as mine.

  “Yeah. I just miss you. I’ve forgotten how nice it is to just hang out. Be young. Since all this Genesis stuff came on, I kind of miss humanity.”

  I dropped her hand.

  “Humanity is boring.” Phoebe shrugged.

  “Yeah, well I think I’d like a bit of boring now and then.” I blew out a breath.

  “So what did you need me to do, for this record thing?”

  “Help me write a song. And when it’s time to perform, I want you there with me. One more time.”

  “I’d be honored.”

  “Perfect. We begin tomorrow. Tonight, I need some me time.” I stood. “This is the only place I can get any peace.”

  We dispersed to our rooms, and around midnight, I closed my eyes and focused on Cade’s beautiful face.

  “You awake, blue eyes?”

  “Hello, love. Would you like a visit?”

  “Please. And bring Remie.”

  “Something you’d like to tell me?”

  “Late night recon. Bring your dagger.”

  “Always.”

  I stretched out on the full size bed, staring at the celiling fan spinning above my head. I closed my eyes and concentrated on visions. I hadn’t had one in a few days. Not since returning to Aravot from my last projection.

  A few minutes later, a portal opened, and Cade and Remie shimmied through.

  “Chayah.” Remie bowed his head.

  I nodded back.

  “Hello, love.” Cade bent down and pulled me up into his arms. “I’ve missed you.”

  “It’s only been a few hours.”

  “A few hours too many.” He kissed my neck.

  I pulled back and motioned to a chair in the corner. “Have a seat, Remie.” I sat on the edge of the bed. “So tonight, I want Cade to come with me. We’re going to jump into the dark realm and do some digging. I need to find out where Lilith is, and if we can sneak any information. I need to know if she and Samael have made any contact. Then tomorrow, I’m going to work with Phoebe on a song for the demo deal. I taught her how to use her ring to shield herself today. Why wasn’t she trained on its use, Cade?”

  “I don’t know, it’s something to ask Raz.”

  “Gabrielle trained me a little,” Remine said. “I’ll work with Phoebe. Maybe Julian or Raz can help?”

  “Good. So tonight, you stay here, watch Phoebe so Cade and I can project. If you need anything, just talk to us.” I glanced to Cade. “Can he do that yet?”

  “He’s getting better.”

  “Okay, Remie. Show me.”

  Remie closed his eyes, obviously concentrating. It was kind of cute. “Is this okay?”

  “Perfect. Now me. Can you hear me, Rem?”

  “Loud and clear, Chayah.”

  “Good. I want you to work with Phoebe. Practice talking to her. I know she’s human, but she’s an empath, and you two have technically converged, so keep trying. I’m sure she can do it, she just needs practice.”

  “Will do,” he said. “When will you two be back?”

  “Im not sure, it depends if we can find anything or not. The more we stumble on, the longer we’ll be. Whatever you do, don’t leave before I get back.”

  “Got it.” Remie stood. “Am I dismissed? I’d kind of like to see my wife.”

  I nodded. “You’re dimissed. Go get her, tiger.”

  Remie rolled his eyes then left the room, closing the door behind him.

  “I was going to do this alone, but since I’d be spending enough time without you, I asked you to come with me. And you don’t know anything they don’t, so I figure it’s still safe.”

  “Thank you for thinking of me.” He smirked, holding my jaw in his hands.

  “Anytime, blue eyes.”

  I opened my hands to form a portal, but Cade covered them with his and stopped me. “Let me be the man for change, eh?”

  “You can be the man anytime you want.” I winked.

  “Perhaps if you’re a good girl, when we return?”

  “Now you’re talking.”

  Chapter Thirty-Seven

  Cade

  It only took a minute of focus for Zoe and I to Converge, and in an instant, we were soul projecting into the dark realm. Zoe opened a portal when we arrived, and we slipped through, materializing into the Fifth plane.