CONTENTS

  CONTENTS

  COPYRIGHT

  CHAPTER ONE

  CHAPTER TWO

  CHAPTER THREE

  CHAPTER FOUR

  CHAPTER FIVE

  CHAPTER SIX

  CHAPTER SEVEN

  CHAPTER EIGHT

  CHAPTER NINE

  CHAPTER TEN

  EPILOGUE: BUTCH

  EPILOGUE 2: ROX

  AUTHOR’S NOTE

  ALSO BY QUIRAH CASEY

  Prologue

  Chapter One

  COPYRIGHT

  Copyright © 2019 by Quirah Casey

  All rights reserved. This book or any portion thereof may not be reproduced or used in any manner whatsoever without the express written permission of the author except for the use of brief quotations in a book review.

  This is a work of fiction. Names, characters, businesses, places, events, locales, and incidents are either the products of the author’s imagination or used in a fictitious manner. Any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, or actual events is purely coincidental.

  Cover Design by Quirah Casey (Salvation Creations)

  http://quirahcasey.com/

  Editing by Talia Smart

  https://www.editingissmart.com/

  To my granny for inspiring me with her crazy stories.

  CHAPTER ONE

  There’s a dead body in the trunk of my car.

  No, correction: not my car. The car that I stole, that we stole.

  “Fuck!”

  “No need to freak out.” I turn my head away from the car to find Ru’s silver gaze on me.

  My eyes widen. “There’s a body in the trunk of a car we stole!” I yell at her.

  She scoffs, her nose wrinkling. “Don’t be so dramatic, Roxy. Look at the people who raised us. A dead body isn’t anything new.” Despite her words, I see a slight tremor in her hand as she runs it through her curly hair.

  “Ruthie!”

  Her eyes flicker between me and the trunk, illuminated by the street lights. “We’ve killed before.”

  “This isn’t the same!”

  A hiss passes her lips as her fingernails extend and sharpen into claws, and inky black scales appear along her mocha skin, betraying the panic beneath her attempts to appear calm.

  I shake my head, keeping my gaze on her rapidly changing form as I try to get through to her. “There’s a difference between killing on purpose and by accident!”

  We didn’t mean to do this. We just wanted to teach him a lesson. Sure, we kidnapped him, but we planned to release him alive, still breathing. It was a spur-of-the-moment decision to take him, but we had clear, non-murderous intentions. Grab him, scare him, and send him on his way knowing that if he ever got up to his old tricks, we’d send someone scarier after him.

  My own anger continues to rise as I realize how stupid this was. “What were we thinking? We’re not fucking vigilantes!” I smash my fist into the car, adding a new dent among the collection of old ones. The pain in my hand hardly registers.

  Ru’s scales start to retreat but quickly return, an ever-shifting representation of her unstable emotions. “No, we’re not, but we know right from wrong.” She jabs a finger at the trunk. “That man was doing nothing but wrong.” Her eyes harden and her jaw clenches. The tremor in her hand is gone, and I can tell she’s turned on her other personality. The steely one. She’s shutting off her humanity as much as possible.

  It’s a mechanism she learned from her mother, a master of turning her own humanity off entirely.

  A mechanism I myself learned after my family was killed.

  Even so, it’s a mechanism I can’t turn on right now. Something about this is shaking me up.

  I’ve never been afraid of death; neither dishing it out nor receiving it.

  When I was six, death and darkness surrounded me and became my destiny. They haven’t left since.

  Yet, when I think of the corpse in the trunk, the man’s lifeless blue eyes and bloody blonde hair, I feel sick to my stomach.

  “What’s gotten into you, Rox—”

  Ru’s words cut off as I lean over and vomit, alcohol and club food splattering the concrete.

  “Gods.” I hear Ru’s light footsteps approaching, and then her hand touches the middle of my back, gently rubbing. “What is wrong with you? You’re a fucking machine when it comes to killing, on track to wipe out an entire government, and you’re getting sick because we killed a criminal?” Despite her comforting touch, her words are cold, and when I look up at her, she’s watching me with confusion, a crease in her forehead.

  As her light eyes linger on me, my stomach starts to turn again, and Ru hops out of the way in time to avoid a wave of vomit headed for her leather boots.

  “Fuck. Do I need to take you home and handle this myself?” she questions, folding her arms over her chest and frowning at the puddle of puke.

  “No.” I wipe my mouth with the back of my hand.

  “Good. Now, what are we going to do about the body?”

  “I—” Lights hit the alley, illuminating us for just a moment as a car passes by. “First, we need to get out of here. And then we need to get the body to Butch. She’s got some hungry ghouls on speed dial.”

  24 hours earlier…

  CHAPTER TWO

  A knife is heading right toward my head.

  I dive out of the way, grunting when my skin scrapes against the concrete. I push the pain to the back of my mind, rolling out of the way of an incoming booted foot.

  Quickly, I get to my feet, not thinking twice as I reach for Gwev, my sword. I duck beneath an incoming fist, swinging Gwev and forcing my attacker to retreat a few steps.

  A fine tingle buzzes along my skin, adrenaline threatening to overtake me.

  I grit my teeth, pushing forward, keeping my attacker in my sights. He narrows his eyes, moving under my next swing and charging me. His elbow connects with my jaw, hard, and agony explodes across my face.

  I blink repeatedly as the next punch lands, striking my stomach and knocking the wind out of me. I stumble back, trying to catch my breath and steady myself.

  My attacker spots the weakness and strikes out again, this time kicking me in the wrist. I drop Gwev, and she hits the ground with an ominous clatter.

  If I don’t pull my shit together soon, it’ll all be over. I duck under my attacker’s next kick, taking out his other leg with a well-aimed punch. He goes down, but in a matter of seconds, he’s pulled me down with him and his hands are pressed against my shoulders, holding me against the ground.

  For a brief moment, I let him think that he has me trapped, keeping my torso unmoving as I reach my hand out to the side for the knife that missed my head earlier. Just as the man’s hands wrap around my neck, I press the knife to his throat.

  Silence.

  I smile wickedly.

  “Well done, Roxanna.” Conrad’s wide smile matches my own as he lets go of my neck. “I was worried for a second there.” He gets to his feet, dusting off his pants before offering me a large hand.

  I clasp it, letting him pull me to my feet as I try to push back the rush I feel. “As if, Conrad. I rarely lose fights to you these days.” I grin. The word “humble” has never really been used to describe me.

  His brown eyes meet mine as he pushes a hand through his salt-and-pepper hair. “Don’t forget who trained you, girl.” There’s no malice in his words, though, only pride.

  “Yeah, yeah, old man.”

  His big hand grasps my shoulder, and I meet his now-serious gaze. “You’re almost ready.”

  I beg to differ.

  “I’m ready now,” I argue, already knowing Conrad’s next words by heart.

  He shakes his head. I can tell from the way his shoulders stiffen that he doesn't plan on indulging our tired argument tonight. “No, you’re not. We have one more year before the Calling, and you still have so much left to learn.”

  “I don’t need another year of training! I’ve already had eleven!” My heart rate picks up and my body heats as I try to push my anger back.

  “We’ve had this discussion, Roxanna. We don’t know what the royals are going to throw into the Calling, and while you may think you’re ready, I know you’re not!” Conrad’s temper only forces its way up rarely, but it’s always in moments like this, when we talk about the royals. “Do not bother arguing; the plans are already set. We have a week left here in the mortal realm, and then we’re going back to Caelumine to finish your training at home. Taking on the royals can wait one more year.”

  CHAPTER THREE

  “I’m ready to return to Caelumine and get my revenge.”

  “What’s stopping you?” Ru asks as she lies on her bed, throwing and catching a ball with one hand and holding a beer in the other. “Is Conrad still insisting there’s more shit you have to learn?” She turns her head slightly to look at me.

  “Yes,” I grunt, plopping down next to her and stealing her beer. Unlike Ru, I hardly indulge in anything that will make my brain foggy. I like to be crystal clear at all times. Today, though, I’m soothed by the bitter taste of the Russian beer.

  Ru rolls her eyes, grabbing another beer from her bedside table without breaking her rhythm throwing the little black ball. She pulls the cap off with her teeth. “Parents don’t understand.”

  “Complains an orphan.”

  Her mouth twists to the side. “Your biological parents were killed. Mine just traded me to pay off their drug debt. It was probably the best thing that could have happ
ened to me, honestly.”

  Looking around her huge bedroom, which is full of everything a teenage dragon could want, I figure she’s right.

  “And yeah, Conrad may be more like an uncle to you, but he stepped right the fuck up when your parents were murdered. Not too many people would take in a warrior princess.” I roll my eyes at the old nickname, but Ru’s next words are serious. “You can’t deny that he’s been a good father figure.” She doesn’t meet my gaze, but I can hear the sadness in her voice.

  Our biological parents may be gone under completely different circumstances, but both Ru and I have adoptive single parents who have given us the world. If anyone threatened Ru, her mother would rip their heart out without a second thought. She’s done it before. She may not be the nicest person, but her love for Ru knows no limits.

  And yeah, Conrad’s tough on me, but he has always loved me like a daughter, even before my parents died. He and my dad were practically brothers. He’s always watched over my family, and without him…well, without him, I’d be dead.

  I let out a sigh, rubbing my temple. “How can they love us so much and understand us so little?”

  Ru finally looks at me, the pool of gray in her eyes swirling as she thinks. “They’re just protective. Think about it: they’re both dangerous people, and it seems they’re just trying to keep all that danger away from us, no matter how useless those efforts may be. Conrad’s reasoning for being so strict with you…I think I understand it, in a way.”

  “Really?” I ask, raising a brow. Out of the two of us, Ru has never been the reasonable one. She’s the chaotic, reckless, short-tempered one; I’ve always been more level-headed.

  “Yeah.” She throws her empty beer bottle across the room, and it lands in her trash can with a soft thump. She sits up, pulling her knees to her chest and wrapping her arms around them as she studies me, her wild black and gray curls spilling over her shoulders.

  “Explain it to me, then,” I tell her, sitting up to meet her eyes. “I’m all ears.”

  A sad smile touches her lips for a brief second, and I wonder why she’s in such a solemn mood. “Like I said, he wants to protect you, but he also realizes that he can’t, no matter what he does.” I open my mouth to protest, but she puts a hand up, halting my words. “You’re going to go back to Caelumine to compete in what’s basically a death match by design. It’s the only way to avenge your parents and reclaim your throne. There’s no way around it, and Conrad wants to make sure that you’re as prepared as possible. He knows that once you enter the Calling, that’s it. There’s no more hand-holding or teaching. You’re either going to win, or…you’ll die. All he can do is give you the tools for the former.”

  She pauses.

  “And if you die, not only will he lose the only daughter that he’s ever known, but he’ll also be failing his best friend, his brother, for the second time. I can’t imagine how guilty I’d feel if I had been someone’s champion and protector, they died on my watch, and then I let their daughter die a decade later.”

  The depth of her reasoning is unexpected, but…

  “It makes sense,” I say lightly, knowing she’s right. I try to swallow past the lump in my throat, forcing back the memories of my parents’ faces. “But I still don’t like it.”

  “That’s because you’re chomping at the bit to get this all over with. I didn’t call you warrior princess just to piss you off. I called you that because you’ve been ready to face the world ever since I first met you. You clothes were battered and you were covered in soot, but you were already determined to avenge your family. But you’ve already waited ten years, so what’s one more?” She pats my shoulder, her eyes losing a bit of seriousness as a slight smile appears on her face. “You can’t spend too much time worrying over things you can’t change, but you know what you can do?”

  I try to follow her lead and shake off the somber mood. “Sure, my wise master. Tell me what I can do.”

  “Party.”

  “Ah. There’s the Ruthie I know.”

  She smirks, and her eyes lighten. “Surely you didn’t think I was going to stay home and mope on a Friday night? What did you think the beers were for?” I only look at her. “Pregaming. Gods, Rox.” She shakes her head, mocking me.

  I glance at the time on my phone. “It’s not even two o’clock. How are you already pregaming?”

  “If you’re on time, you’re late.”

  I snort. “Are you already drunk? Because that’s the dumbest thing I’ve ever heard.”

  She waves her hand at me. “Blah, blah, blah.” She glances at the time on her phone. “I have to go pick my sisters up from school, and you have to go home and find something to wear. We’re going out tonight, Rox, and we’re going to get fucked up.”

  CHAPTER FOUR

  Getting fucked up isn’t something I do often.

  Despite the fact that Ru is the closest thing I have to a sister and one hundred percent my best friend, we couldn’t be more different.

  She’s wild, reckless, and carefree.

  I’m focused, calm, and careful.

  I’d never do anything that would jeopardize my future, and I know what my future has to be.

  Ru… She knows what she wants to do, or so she says, but it’s not going to happen. She wants to be just like her mom: a leader, a woman driven by power.

  Her mom wants anything but that.

  They’re both so stubborn, and it’s causing problems. Ru’s been lashing out even more than usual and making stupid decisions.

  I’d almost never let her drag me along on one of her wild nights, but today…

  Today I need to let loose, to stop being Roxanna the warrior. Today I’m just Roxanna, a fun teenager, because maybe Ru is on to something.

  She was full of wise words today.

  With a sigh, I rummage through my clothes, trying to find something that isn’t meant for training. I throw out tank tops and running shorts.

  “Fuck.” I slam a fist into the wall, cracking the plaster and sending dust motes swirling into the air.

  Of course I don’t have any clubbing clothes.

  I don’t even know why I bothered looking.

  My door swings open, and I find Conrad looking at me, his brows pulled together and a frown on his face. He glances at the newly formed hole in the wall and then at my still-curled fist.

  “As much as I don’t want to ask, I feel it’s my responsibility…” His frown deepens. “What in the hell is wrong with you?”

  I sigh, feeling my cheeks warm as my heart races a little faster. “There’s nothing wrong with me!” I can’t tell him that I just punched a hole in the wall over clothes, of all things?

  But it’s not really about the clothes, is it?

  He huffs out a breath, taking a step into the room. “Look, kid, I know you’re a teenager, but I’m not used to you acting like one.”

  And that’s the problem, isn’t it. I never get to act like a teenager, but I never get to act like an adult, either. I’m caught in between. Old enough to prepare for war, but too young to decide when it’s time to attack.

  “Roxanna. You’ve got to help me out here.”

  I slowly unclench my fist, stretching my fingers, and meet Conrad’s worried gaze. “It’s nothing.”

  He shakes his head slightly, folding his big arms over his chest. “Is this still about returning to Caelumine?”

  “Of course it is!” I yell, my temper rising once again. “Everything in my life is about Caelumine! Everything goes back to that place! My past, my present, my future! It’s where my life started and it’s where it will end!”

  He rubs his chin.“I see.”

  “No, you don’t see, not really,” I argue, his calm manor only pissing me off more. “You see a warrior. You don’t see the girl underneath, the girl who’s dying, who just wants this all to be over with, who doesn’t want to wait another fucking year!”

  This isn’t like me. I don’t have bouts of rage. I sure as fuck don’t complain about the responsibility I have to avenge my family. I’ve always welcomed it.

  “Roxan—”

  I put up a hand, cutting him off. “I can’t talk right now. I need to go blow off some steam.” I grab my phone, the only item that really belongs to me other than my sword, which is already bound to my hip. “I’ll be back later.” I brush past him, gliding out the door.