Dakota chuckled. “And girrrl, don’t get me started. Being a wife, mother, and businesswoman means I juggle a lot of balls on a daily basis. Trust me when I say I drop more balls than I keep in the air. There are days when I don’t know if I’m coming or going, and I can’t tell you the number of times I wanted to run away from home.”

  They all laughed at that, including Journey. She hated the idea of anyone struggling with responsibilities like she was, but she had to admit it felt good to hear she wasn’t alone.

  “Well, since Geneva isn’t here, I’ll pretend I’m her,” London said with a wicked grin, and Journey rolled her eyes. They all knew her sister would be talking plenty of trash.

  “I’m not sure I want to hear it,” Journey said.

  London’s grin grew larger. “Too bad, because someone has to fill the spot of talking crazy. Let me see, what would she say….” London tapped a manicured finger against her chin. “Oh, I know, she’d say fuck his brains out, and if that doesn’t work, sit on his face.”

  Everyone roared. That was exactly what Geneva would say, probably word for word.

  “If only that was the problem,” Journey said when she finally stopped laughing. “Interesting enough, our sex life is amazing. My problem is trying to juggle work and family. Just when I feel like I’m handling everything, I get bombarded with work, and then my home life suffers.”

  “Yeah, you have been missing out on a lot of family time,” Dakota said.

  Journey was sure she wasn’t only talking about home life but also Supreme’s family. They were all just as close as if they were blood relatives. Now that she was thinking about it, she was closer to the wives than some of her cousins. They were a lifeline of sorts.

  Yet, lately, she’d chosen work over all of them.

  The thought was jarring, sending her heart plummeting to her feet.

  “I have to do better,” she said, rubbing her temples. “I can’t keep going like this. Otherwise, I’m going to lose everyone I love. Laz has already lost hope. He might even leave me.”

  Dakota wrapped her arm around Journey’s shoulders. “He’s not leaving. He might be a little upset now, but he’d be miserable without you. We know that, and he does, too. Just talk to him. You guys can come up with some type of compromise and then get back on track.”

  “We’ve tried, Dee. This is all on me. He does his part. I’m the one who can’t seem to get my act together.”

  “Same,” Zenobia piped in. “I don’t have half as many responsibilities as the rest of you, and there are days when I don’t feel like I know what I’m doing. And now that we’re having a baby, I’m scared to death that I’m going to screw everything up.”

  “Wait!”

  “What?”

  “You’re pregnant?”

  “You sneaky little….”

  Everyone spoke up at once, laughing and hugging her, genuinely thrilled for her and Angelo. The ladies lost it all over again when they learned that the couple was having twins.

  Their Supreme family was growing. Seemed every year someone was having a baby.

  London reached over and squeezed Zenobia’s hand when the woman looked as if she was going to break down.

  “You’re going to be an amazing mommy, and when life gets tough, and it will, you have all of us to lean on.”

  “And just think, you already have built-in aunties and babysitters,” Journey said, hugging Zen again.

  “They’re right,” Egypt said. “You can always count on us to have your back. As far as feeling as if you don’t know what you’re doing, we’ve all been there, sometimes on a weekly basis,” she said with a laugh. “But no one ever said adulting would be easy. Then you add in parenting and trying to have a successful career, and it’s easy to get overwhelmed. All you can do is hang in there, and don’t be afraid to ask for help.”

  “And don’t feel like you have to be perfect,” Dakota added. “That’s when shit really hits the fan.”

  They all laughed as they reclaimed their seats.

  More of the tension and stress Journey had been feeling for the last few months continued to wane. She had to remember that she wasn’t some superwoman who could or had to do it all. There were times when she should’ve asked for help, especially at work, but didn’t.

  Yep, there were definitely going to be some changes. She just had to figure out where to start.

  “I’m so glad you guys are saying all of this. I can totally relate,” Dani said as they went back to eating and drinking. “After two broken engagements, I had given up on the idea of marriage and having a family. I thought that opening my heart to Ashton was the scariest thing I’d ever do, but when the kids came along, I knew I was wrong. Caring for two preschoolers and running a business is scary as hell.”

  Again, laughter floated around the room as they all shared mommy stories. As Journey listened, she realized that she definitely wasn’t alone. They all experienced moments of being overwhelmed and dropping balls that they were juggling. Still, she didn’t have the answers she needed to know what to do next.

  “I don’t know how to pull my marriage back together,” she blurted.

  In addition to her law degree, she had a degree in public affairs. Yet, she couldn’t keep her husband happy and her marriage together.

  Journey lifted her glass of wine to her mouth but stopped. “It’s hard to be home by five with dinner on the table and attend family events when I sometimes put in eighty-hour work weeks.”

  “Why do you do it?” Zenobia asked.

  ‘Why do I do what? Work?”

  “Why do you feel like you have to put in eighty hours? I can’t even imagine what all goes into trying cases, but is it worth it?”

  Journey stared at her friend, then blinked several times before setting her glass back on the table as she pondered the question.

  “While you’re thinking about that, think about what’s most important to you in your life,” Egypt said.

  “My family is my life,” Journey said without hesitation, even surprising herself. It was a no-brainer. She couldn’t imagine living without Laz and Arielle, as well as her immediate family and those around the table.

  “Then you know what you have to do,” Dakota said, filling shot glasses with the tequila that no one had touched.

  Journey looked at her friend, wondering if she was saying what she thought she was saying.

  “Don’t look at me like that,” Dakota said, handing everyone except Zen a glass. “You don’t need us to tell you that you work too damn much. I get that you want to be the best at your job. Hell, you are the best, but Journey, at some point, you have to ask yourself. Is it worth it? Is putting in an obscene amount of hours at work worth it in the big scheme of things?”

  “I remember when I decided to give up touring,” Zenobia said, holding up her water glass for Dakota to refill it. “I loved making music, and I loved my fans, but the stress that went with being in the public’s eye and touring was too much. It was either continue doing it or live a miserable life. I chose happiness.” Though Zen no longer put out records, she still performed on occasion and wrote songs for other musical artists.

  “In the words of Geneva….” London said, and everyone laugh-groaned. “Fuck that job! You need to go home and take care of your man.”

  Everyone burst out laughing, and Journey swatted London’s arm. It wasn’t just that she had Gen’s words down pat, but she even sounded like her.

  Journey knew what she had to do. First, she needed to regain her husband’s attention…and his trust.

  Chapter Thirteen

  Laz dragged his tired body up the stairs leading to the crash room he was using at Supreme Security.

  His body ached.

  His mind whirled.

  His emotions were all over the place.

  He wanted nothing more than to fall face-first into bed and sleep for a week. Which was what he should be doing, but how could he? He couldn’t possibly let the people gunning for him win. That would be unacceptable and not the way he operated.

  An eye for an eye.

  It was only fair for those involved to experience the pain that he had endured. The fear of not knowing if his child and wife were safe. The horror of watching a young man who had turned his life around bleed out in front of him.

  Yeah, somebody was going to pay.

  Laz had just left a meeting with Mason, Ashton, and Parker to discuss what they knew so far regarding the gunmen, which wasn’t much. Technically, it had been too late in the day for anyone to be gathering, especially on a Sunday night. But that’s what friends did, even if there wasn’t good news to share.

  At least there had been one high point in the conversation. Laz had learned that the day before, Hamilton had called in his own favors to keep Laz’s name out of the press.

  The media would’ve eaten up news about a former Atlanta PD detective who now worked for a security agency involved in a fatal shooting. Thanks to Ham, there had been nothing in the news about the incident.

  At least not yet.

  One thing about Hamilton and Mason was that they protected the people who worked for them, and also did whatever was necessary to protect the stellar reputation of the agency.

  Outside of that, the last two days had been a bust.

  Laz gripped the stairwell railing, pushing himself to make it up the second flight of stairs though he was bone weary. It had been a long-ass day.

  After finding nothing in the stolen vehicle that morning, he, Parker, and Ashton started reaching out and hunting down their personal contacts around the city. His Supreme brothers were amazing at finding answers, but Laz had to tap into some of his other sources every now and then. In other words, those who were connected to the illegal shit on the streets of Atlanta.

  People like C-Dogg. Working with them was the only way he’d be able to find the shooters before the cops did.

  Otherwise, he’d miss his opportunity to inflict the worst type of justice on those responsible. He wouldn’t hold back but planned to stop just short of killing them. Because the last thing he wanted was for his ass to end up back in jail.

  Mason’s parting words rattled inside Laz’s mind before they left the meeting minutes ago.

  I want you to let the cops handle this case going forward, and I also want you to take some time off. You got lucky with the bullet not hitting any arteries or doing any major damage. But you’re no good to anyone if you don’t let that shoulder heal. Besides, I don’t need you getting into any legal trouble—or worse.

  “I just won’t get caught,” Laz mumbled under his breath as he trudged up the last few steps. “I should’ve taken the damn elevator.”

  He reached the landing and pulled open the door to the hallway. When he turned the corner too short, he bumped his shoulder, and a sharp pain pierced through him like a serrated knife scraping against his bones. His breath caught.

  Shit.

  He leaned forward, gritting his teeth, waiting for the pain to ease. So much for the pain pill he’d taken a short while ago. The wound hurt like someone had branded him with a hot poker.

  Seconds ticked by before he stood upright and readjusted the sling holding his arm in place. Moving again, he continued down the hallway.

  The moment he reached the door, a sudden need to go home enveloped him like a tight band around his chest.

  He knew what that was about. The idea of sleeping without Journey made him physically ache inside. He didn’t sleep well without his wife next to him.

  Still, Laz pushed open the door, knowing their temporary separation was for the best.

  He stepped across the threshold, and the scent of barbecue had him pulling up short just inside the door. The enticing aroma reminded him that he hadn’t eaten since lunch and was suddenly hungry.

  Unable to see anything in the darkened room, he flipped on the light switch. The lamps on the side tables provided enough illumination for him to see Journey curled up in a ball on the bed.

  Laz’s pulse beat a little faster and hammered in his ears. The exhaustion and pain from moments ago were all but gone.

  His wife had come to him.

  That thought had his heart turning over in his chest, and he would be lying if he said he wasn’t glad to see her. He missed the hell out of her. Not because he hadn’t seen her since early that morning, but because of the tension that had them arguing more than talking. That wasn’t them. That’s not how they usually communicated, and that wasn’t what he wanted for their future.

  I want what we had.

  Kenton had been giving him updates throughout the day about her, but seeing Journey with his own eyes brought a level of peace that Laz hadn’t felt all day.

  Yeah, he was happy to see her. They might have their issues, but his love for her was as strong as ever. He needed to get his head out of his ass and figure out how to fix whatever the hell was broken between them.

  Journey’s light snores met his ears, and his gaze swept the length of her, taking in her shapely form in a red sweater dress. Her long legs were bare, and he wanted to go over and run his hand along her soft skin and not stop until he reached the sweet spot between her thighs.

  He groaned at the thought and shook his head. Sex wouldn’t fix their relationship but damned if he wasn’t craving his wife.

  Instead of waking Journey, he grabbed the duffel bag sitting on the floor near the door, the one he had dropped off earlier, and went into the bathroom. It was a hassle taking a shower and trying not to get the bandage wet, especially since he didn’t feel up to changing it, but he made it work.

  Twenty minutes later, he had showered and slipped into a pair of navy-blue sleep pants. No way would he be able to get a T-shirt over his head. Instead, he just put the sling back on. He could barely keep his eyes open as he grabbed his two cell phones and left his bag in the bathroom.

  Stepping into the bedroom, Laz stopped when his gaze collided with Journey’s.

  “Hi,” she said, her voice low and thick with sleep. She looked as tired as he felt.

  “What are you doing here?” he asked.

  His body tightened with need as she stood and slowly moved toward him. Seeing how the dress hugged her figure, bringing attention to her pebbled nipples, it was clear that she wasn’t wearing a bra.

  Laz swallowed hard as she ran her hands down the sides of her body and smoothed her short dress as if self-conscious. Strands of her thick hair had come loose from the ponytail on top of her head and were sticking out, but it didn’t detract from her beauty.

  Between the hair and her face scrubbed free of makeup, she definitely had that sexy I-just-woke-up thing going on, and her natural beauty stole his breath.

  “I can’t sleep without you next to me,” she said, mirroring his thoughts from a little while ago. Her words were almost funny, considering she’d been sound asleep when he’d walked in.

  She eased toward him, and his dick stirred the closer she got. Now that she was there, looking sexy in red, he probably wouldn’t be able to fall asleep anytime soon.

  “I also came because we need to talk.”

  Laz shook his head. “No. Not tonight, Jay. I’m all talked out, and I can’t handle another argument right now.”

  “I know—me either. That’s why I’m going to do the talking, and you’ll for-real listen this time. Have a seat.” She pointed at one of the chairs at the small bistro-like table near the single window.

  Instead of arguing, Laz did as she said and almost laughed. He had a love-hate relationship with what he referred to as her lawyer tone. He loved how ballsy she was when she had something to say or a point to get across like she was questioning someone on the witness stand. That didn’t keep him from hating when she used the tone on him.

  Laz set the phones on the table. He pulled the chair out and turned it to face her before sitting down.

  “I love you,” she said as she eased even closer. “I love you more than I did the day I agreed to marry you, and I’m going to love you until the day I die. I know you don’t want to hear it again, but I’m sorry for taking you and our marriage for granted. And I’m sure you don’t want to listen to promises that I’ll get my act together and remember what’s most important to me—you and Arielle.

  “But Laz, I really am sorry. If I could have a do-over for yesterday, I’d take it in a heartbeat. I was horrified by what you and Ari went through. I can only remember one other time in my life when I’d been as scared as I was hearing the news—and that was when I was kidnapped.”

  Laz shuddered inside as memories of that time flooded his mind. Terrible regrets would haunt him to the end of time, knowing that someone had taken her. They had planned to do harm to her because of him. She might’ve only been scared at the time, but he’d been terrified that he wouldn’t find her. That he wouldn’t see her again.

  Journey stopped directly in front of him.

  “The only thing that helped me stay calm during that time was knowing that you would find me. There was no doubt in my mind. You’ll never understand how horrible I felt yesterday when I wasn’t there for the man who holds my heart. Please forgive me for not being there when you needed me. I swear that will never happen again. I will do anything to make things right between us, even quit my job.”

  She said the last part quietly, but Laz didn’t miss the conviction in her eyes or her tone. He would never ask her to leave a career that meant the world to her. It brought her joy to help get criminals off the streets, and she was damn good at it. No way would he ask her to quit.

  Tears filled her eyes and his gut twisted.

  “Will you ever be able to forgive me?” she asked in a small voice, the bravado from moments ago gone. “Just tell me what it will take. I can’t lose you.”

  Laz stood and reached for her. She hurried forward and leaned into his good side, and he tightened his arm around her waist.

  “You will never lose me,” he said quietly and kissed her. “I love you too damn much.”