I forced a smile. I could not speak. My throat felt dry and tight.

  'It's not only this room,' she said. 'It's in many rooms in the house.

  In the morning-room, in the hall, even in the little flower-room. I feel her everywhere. You do too, don't you?'

  She stared at me curiously. Her voice dropped to a whisper. 'Sometimes, when I walk along the corridor here, I fancy I hear her just behind me.

  That quick, light footstep. I could not mistake it anywhere. And in the minstrels' gallery above the hall. I've seen her leaning there, in the evenings in the old days, looking down at the hall below and calling to the dogs. I can fancy her there now from time to time. It's almost as though I catch the sound of her dress sweeping the stairs as she comes down to dinner.' She paused. She went on looking at me, watching my eyes.

  'Do you think she can see us, talking to one another now?' she said slowly.

  'Do you think the dead come back and watch the living?'

  I swallowed. I dug my nails into my hands.

  'I don't know,' I said. 'I don't know.' My voice sounded high-pitched and unnatural. Not my voice at all.

  'Sometimes I wonder,' she whispered. 'Sometimes I wonder if she comes back here to Manderley and watches you and Mr de Winter together.'

  We stood there by the door, staring at one another. I could not take my eyes away from hers. How dark and sombre they were in the white skull's face of hers, how malevolent, how full of hatred. Then she opened the door into the corridor. 'Robert is back now,' she said. 'He came back a quarter of an hour ago. He has orders to take your tea out under the chestnut tree.'

  She stepped aside for me to pass. I stumbled out on to the corridor, not looking where I was going. I did not speak to her, I went down the stairs blindly, and turned the corner and pushed

  through the door that led to my own rooms in the east wing. I shut the door of my room and turned the key, and put the key in my pocket. ,

  Then I lay down on my bed and closed my eyes. I felt deadly sick.

  chapter fifteen

  Maxim rang up the next morning to say he would be back about seven. Frith took the message. Maxim did not ask to speak to me himself. I heard the telephone ring while I was at breakfast and I thought perhaps Frith would come into the dining-room and say 'Mr de Winter on the telephone, Madam.'

  I had put down my napkin and had risen to my feet. And then Frith came back into the dining-room and gave me the message.

  He saw me push back my chair and go to the door. 'Mr de Winter has rung off, Madam,' he said, 'there was no message. Just that he would be back about seven.'

  I sat down in my chair again and picked up my napkin. Frith must have thought me eager and stupid rushing across the dining-room.

  'All right, Frith. Thank you,' I said.

  I went on eating my eggs and bacon, Jasper at my feet, the old dog in her basket in the corner. I wondered what I should do with my day. I had slept badly; perhaps because I was alone in the room. I had been restless, waking up often, and when I glanced at my clock I saw the hands had scarcely moved. When I did fall asleep I had varied, wandering dreams. We were walking through woods, Maxim and I, and he was always just a little ahead of me. I could not keep up with him. Nor could I see his face. Just his figure, striding away in front of me all the time. I must have cried while I slept, for when I woke in the

  morning the pillow was damp. My eyes were heavy too, when I looked in the glass. I looked plain, unattractive. I rubbed a little rouge on my cheeks in a wretched attempt to give myself colour. But it made me worse.

  It gave me a false clown look. Perhaps I did not know the best way to put it on. I noticed Robert staring at me as I crossed the hall and went into breakfast.

  About ten o'clock as I was crumbling some pieces for the birds on the terrace the telephone rang again. This time it was for me. Frith came and said Mrs Lacy wanted to speak to me.

  'Good morning, Beatrice,' I said.

  'Well, my dear, how are you?' she said, her telephone voice typical of herself, brisk, rather masculine, standing no nonsense, and then not waiting for my answer. 'I thought of motoring over this afternoon and looking up Gran. I'm lunching with people about twenty miles from you.

  Shall I come and pick you up and we'll go together? It's time you met the old lady, you know.'

  'I'd like to very much, Beatrice,' I said.

  'Splendid. Very well, then. I'll come along for you about half past three.

  Giles saw Maxim at the dinner. Poor food, he said, but excellent wine.

  All right, my dear, see you later.'

  The click of the receiver, and she was gone. I wandered back into the garden. I was glad she had rung up and suggested the plan of going over to see the grandmother. It made something to look forward to, and broke the monotony of the day. The hours had seemed so long until seven o'clock.

  I did not feel in my holiday mood today, and I had no wish to go off with Jasper to the Happy Valley and come to the cove and throw stones in the water. The sense of freedom had departed, and the childish desire to run across the lawns in sand-shoes. I went and sat down with a book and The Times and my knitting in the rose-garden, domestic as a matron, yawning in the warm sun while the bees hummed amongst the flowers.

  I tried to concentrate on the bald newspaper columns, and later to lose myself in the racy plot of the novel in my hands. I did not want to think of yesterday afternoon and Mrs Danvers. I tried to forget that she was in the house at this moment, perhaps looking down on me from one of the windows. And now and

  again, when I looked up from my book or glanced across the garden, I had the feeling I was not alone.

  There were so many windows in Manderley, so many rooms that were never used by Maxim and myself that were empty now; dust-sheeted, silent, rooms that had been occupied in the old days when his father and his grandfather had been alive, when there had been much entertaining, many servants.

  It would be easy for Mrs Danvers to open those doors softly and close them again, and then steal quietly across the shrouded room and look down upon me from behind the drawn curtains.

  I should not know. Even if I turned in my chair and looked up at the windows I would not see her. I remembered a game I had played as a child that my friends next-door had called 'Grandmother's Steps' and myself 'Old Witch'. You had to stand at the end of the garden with your back turned to the rest, and one by one they crept nearer to you, advancing in short furtive fashion. Every few minutes you turned to look at them, and if you saw one of them moving the offender had to retire to the back line and begin again. But there was always one a little bolder than the rest, who came up very close, whose movement was impossible to detect, and as you waited there, your back turned, counting the regulation Ten, you knew, with a fatal terrifying certainty, that before long, before even the Ten was counted, this bold player would pounce upon you from behind, unheralded, unseen, with a scream of triumph. I felt as tense and expectant as I did then. I was playing 'Old Witch' with Mrs Danvers.

  Lunch was a welcome break to the long morning. The calm efficiency of Frith, and Robert's rather foolish face, helped me more than my book and my newspaper had done. And at half past three, punctual to the moment, I heard the sound of Beatrice's car round the sweep of the drive and pull up at the steps before the house. I ran out to meet her, ready dressed, my gloves in my hand. 'Well, my dear, here I am, what a splendid day, isn't it?' She slammed the door of the car and came up the steps to meet me. She gave me a hard swift kiss, brushing me somewhere near the ear.

  'You don't look well,' she said immediately, looking me up and down, 'much too thin in the face and no colour. What's wrong with you?'

  'Nothing,' I said humbly, knowing the fault of my face too well. 'I'm not a person who ever has much colour.'

  'Oh, bosh,' she replied, 'you looked quite different when I saw you before.'

  'I expect the brown of Italy has worn off,' I said, getting into the car.

  'H'mph,' she said shortly, 'you're as bad as Maxim. Can't stand any criticism about your health. Slam the door hard or it doesn't shut.' We started off down the drive, swerving at the corner, going rather too fast.

  'You're not by any chance starting an infant, are you?' she said, turning her hawk-brown eyes upon me.

  'No,' I said awkwardly. 'No, I don't think so.'

  'No morning sickness or anything like that?'

  'No.'

  'Oh, well - of course it doesn't always follow. I never turned a hair when Roger was born. Felt as fit as a fiddle the whole nine months. I played golf the day before he arrived. There's nothing to be embarrassed about in the facts of nature, you know. If you have any suspicions you had better tell me.'

  'No, really, Beatrice,' I said, 'there's nothing to tell.'

  'I must say I do hope you will produce a son and heir before long. It would be so terribly good for Maxim. I hope you are doing nothing to prevent it.'

  'Of course not,' I said. What an extraordinary conversation.

  'Oh, don't be shocked,' she said, 'you must nevermind what I say. After all, brides of today are up to everything. It's a damn nuisance if you want to hunt and you land yourself with an infant your first season. Quite enough to break a marriage up if you are both keen. Wouldn't matter in your case. Babies needn't interfere with sketching. How is the sketching, by the way?'

  'I'm afraid I don't seem to do much,' I said.

  'Oh, really? Nice weather, too, for sitting out of doors. You only need a camp-stool and a box of pencils, don't you? Tell me, were you interested in those books I sent you?'

  'Yes, of course,' I said. 'It was a lovely present, Beatrice.'

  She looked pleased. 'Glad you liked them,' she said.

  The car sped along. She kept her foot permanently on the accelerator, and took every corner at an acute angle. Two motorists we passed looked out of their windows outraged as she swept by, and one pedestrian in a lane waved his stick at her. I felt rather hot for her. She did not seem to notice though. I crouched lower in my seat.

  'Roger goes up to Oxford next term,' she said, 'heaven knows what he'll do with himself. Awful waste of time I think, and so does Giles, but we couldn't think what else to do with him. Of course he's just like Giles and myself. Thinks of nothing but horses. What on earth does this car in front think it's doing? Why don't you put out your hand, my good man?

  Really, some of these people on the road today ought to be shot.'

  We swerved into a main road, narrowly avoiding the car ahead of us. 'Had any people down to stay?' she asked.

  'No, we've been very quiet,' I said.

  'Much better, too,' she said, 'awful bore, I always think, those big parties. You won't find it alarming if you come to stay with us. Very nice lot of people all round, and we all know one another frightfully well. We dine in one another's houses, and have our bridge, and don't bother with outsiders. You do play bridge, don't you?'

  'I'm not very good, Beatrice.'

  'Oh, we shan't mind that. As long as you can play. I've no patience with people who won't learn. What on earth can one do with them between tea and dinner in the winter, and after dinner? One can't just sit and talk.'

  I wondered why. However, it was simpler not to say anything.

  'It's quite amusing now Roger is a reasonable age,' she went on, 'because he brings his friends to stay, and we have really good fun. You ought to have been with us last Christmas. We had charades. My dear, it was the greatest fun. Giles was in his element. He adores dressing up, you know, and after a glass or two of champagne he's the funniest thing you've ever seen. We often say he's missed his vocation and ought to have been on the stage.' I thought of Giles, and his large moon face, his horn spectacles. I felt the sight of him being funny after champagne would embarrass me. 'He and another man, a great friend of ours, Dickie Marsh, dressed up as women and sang a duet. What exactly it had to do with the word in the charade nobody knew, but it did not matter. We all roared.'

  I smiled politely. 'Fancy, how funny,' I said.

  I saw them all rocking from side to side in Beatrice's drawing-room. All these friends who knew one another so well. Roger would look like Giles.

  Beatrice was laughing again at the memory. 'Poor Giles,' she said. 'I shall never forget his face when Dick squirted the soda syphon down his back. We were all in fits.'

  I had an uneasy feeling we might be asked to spend the approaching Christmas with Beatrice. Perhaps I could have influenza.

  'Of course our acting was never very ambitious,' she said. 'It was just a lot of fun amongst ourselves. At Manderley now, there is scope for a really fine show. I remember a pageant they had there, some years ago.

  People from London came down to do it. Of course that type of thing needs terrific organization.'

  'Yes,' I said.

  She was silent for a while, and drove without speaking.

  'How is Maxim?' she said, after a moment.

  'Very well, thanks,' I said.

  'Quite cheerful and happy?'

  'Oh, yes. Yes, rather.'

  A narrow village street engaged her attention. I wondered whether I should tell her about Mrs Danvers. About the man Favell. I did not want her to make a blunder though, and perhaps tell Maxim.

  'Beatrice,' I said, deciding upon it, 'have you ever heard of someone called Favell? Jack Favell?'

  'Jack Favell,' she repeated. 'Yes, I do know the name. Wait a minute.

  Jack Favell. Of course. An awful bounder. I met him once, ages ago.'

  'He came to Manderley yesterday to see Mrs Danvers,' I said.

  'Really? Oh, well, perhaps he would ...'

  'Why?' I said.

  'I rather think he was Rebecca's cousin,' she said.

  I was very surprised. That man her relation? It was not my idea of the sort of cousin Rebecca would have. Jack Favell her cousin. 'Oh,' I said.

  'Oh, I hadn't realized that.'

  'He probably used to go to Manderley a lot,' said Beatrice. 'I don't know.

  I couldn't tell you. I was very seldom there.' Her manner was abrupt.

  It gave me the impression she did not want to pursue the subject.

  'I did not take to him much,' I said.

  'No,' said Beatrice. 'I don't blame you.'

  I waited, but she did not say any more. I thought it wiser not to tell her how Favell had asked me to keep the visit a secret. It might lead to some complication. Besides, we were just coming to our destination.

  A pair of white gates and a smooth gravel drive.

  'Don't forget the old lady is nearly blind,' said Beatrice, 'and she's not very bright these days. I telephoned to the nurse that we were coming, so everything will be all right.'

  The house was large, red-bricked, and gabled. Late Victorian I supposed.

  Not an attractive house. I could tell in a glance it was the sort of house that was aggressively well-kept by a big staff. And all for one old lady who was nearly blind.

  A trim parlour-maid opened the door.

  'Good afternoon, Norah, how are you?' said Beatrice.

  'Very well, thank you, Madam. I hope you are keeping well?'

  'Oh, yes, we are all flourishing. How has the old lady been, Norah?'

  'Rather mixed, Madam. She has one good day, and then a bad. She's not too bad in herself, you know. She will be pleased to see you I'm sure.'

  She glanced curiously at me.

  "This is Mrs Maxim,' said Beatrice.

  'Yes, Madam. How do you do,' said Norah.

  We went through a narrow hall and a drawing-room crowded with furniture to a veranda facing a square clipped lawn. There were many bright geraniums in stone vases on the steps of the veranda. In the corner was a Bath chair.

  Beatrice's grandmother was sitting there, propped up with pillows and surrounded by shawls. When we came close to her I saw that she had a strong, rather uncanny, resemblance to Maxim. That was what Maxim would look like, if he was very old, if he was blind. The nurse by her side got up from her chair and put a mark in the book she was reading aloud. She smiled at Beatrice.

  'How are you, Mrs Lacy?' she said.

  Beatrice shook hands with her and introduced me. 'The old lady looks all right,' she said. 'I don't know how she does it, at eighty-six. Here we are, Gran,' she said, raising her voice, 'arrived safe and sound.'

  The grandmother looked in our direction. 'Dear Bee,' she said, 'how sweet of you to come and visit me. We're so dull here, nothing for you to do.'

  Beatrice leant over her and kissed her. 'I've brought Maxim's wife over to see you,' she said, 'she wanted to come and see you before, but she and Maxim have been so busy.'

  Beatrice prodded me in the back. 'Kiss her,' she murmured. I too bent down and kissed her on the cheek.

  The grandmother touched my face with her fingers. 'You nice thing,' she said, 'so good of you to come. I'm very pleased to see you, dear. You ought to have brought Maxim with you.'

  'Maxim is in London,' I said, 'he's coming back tonight.'

  'You might bring him next time,' she said. 'Sit down, dear, in this chair, where I can see you. And Bee, come the other side. How is dear Roger?

  He's a naughty boy, he doesn't come and see me.'

  'He shall come during August,' shouted Beatrice; 'he's leaving Eton, you know, he's going up to Oxford.'

  'Oh, dear, he'll be quite a young man, I shan't know him.'

  'He's taller than Giles now,' said Beatrice.

  She went on, telling her about Giles, and Roger, and the horses, and the dogs. The nurse brought out some knitting, and clicked her needles sharply.

  She turned to me, very bright, very cheerful.

  'How are you liking Manderley, Mrs de Winter?'

  'Very much, thank you,' I said.

  'It's a beautiful spot, isn't it?' she said, the needles jabbing one another. 'Of course we don't get over there now, she's not up to it. I am sorry, I used to love our days at Manderley.'

  'You must come over yourself some time,' I said.