Bowie ran his hands up my legs, then turned his head to press a kiss on my palm. “Fine. Whatever you want to do,” he said. “I love you, Gen. I’ve fucking loved you since I was a kid. I’m not letting Kye mess with my head again. Whatever hoops you want me to jump through, I’ll jump.”

  Smiling, I touched my lips to his. This was comfort. It was security. Knowing that I was loved and I wasn’t going to be alone. Once, I had thought that I needed the butterflies, excitement, thrill, and rush that Kye’s wild, larger-than-life personality offered. But I had been a kid and not understood how the Bowies of the world were the smart choices.

  “I love you,” I told him, and I did.

  I loved all that he offered me. There was no heartache always there, threatening to tear me apart. I was never forgotten or put on hold. To Bowie, I was number one. He didn’t need strip clubs and numerous women. I was enough.

  When he picked me up and laid me on the bed beside him, I stared up at him as he took off his shirt. The bare, tattoo-free chest and defined muscles in his lean build were so different from Kye’s that it was easy not to let myself start fantasizing it was my best friend over me. I could be in the present with Bowie.

  He took off his shorts, then began undressing me. There was never a rush to things with him. Bowie was the only guy I’d ever had sex with, so I had nothing to compare it to. The idea of him taking me hard and wanting me so bad that he lost control was for movies and books. I knew it wasn’t reality.

  When he slipped inside of me, I held on to him. I closed my eyes and enjoyed the warmth of his body and the connection. I already knew when he found his release, I wouldn’t do the same. I was pretty sure I was broken when it came to that. Sure, I could get myself off with my imagination and a vibrator on my clit, but I didn’t even get the stirrings of one while having sex.

  Bowie never asked about that, and I figured it was normal for girls not to get off. Maybe most didn’t. Whatever the case, it didn’t matter. Sex was something that gave men pleasure. They needed it. Although I liked having sex. It gave me a sense of having someone I belonged to.

  September 15

  “Have you not told your mom about us?” Bowie asked.

  I spun around, surprised that he was here. I hadn’t heard him come in, but then I’d been on the phone with my mom. How long had he been standing there, listening?

  “Not yet,” I admitted, annoyed that he’d stood there without letting me know he was in my room.

  “Why, Gen?” he asked, his eyes narrowing.

  I wasn’t sure exactly.

  “I need to tell Kye first.” Which was true.

  “Then, tell him. Hell, I’ll drive us to Ocala this weekend. You can tell him in person. Then, we can go to your parents’ house together. Tell them. Visit my mom while we’re there.”

  The idea of telling Kye made my stomach clench up. I couldn’t do it yet. I didn’t know why, and that was definitely something I needed to work through.

  “Not yet. Just … we can wait until Thanksgiving.”

  Bowie stared at me. “Thanksgiving?” he asked incredulously. “Are you fucking serious? Gen, my mom knows. She lives on the same street as your parents. I had to make her promise not to say anything to anyone. You want me to tell her to wait until Thanksgiving?”

  Yes. Ugh. I hated this.

  “I didn’t think about that,” I admitted.

  Bowie threw up his hands in frustration. “No, you didn’t! Because you’re too worried about Kye’s feelings! When the hell has he worried about anyone’s feelings? Sure as shit not mine. Not yours. The world revolves around Kye. He thinks of no one but himself. Yet you are all worried about upsetting him, which makes no sense. He didn’t get hurt four years ago. I DID!”

  Bowie had never shouted before. At least not at me.

  “Kye doesn’t think the world revolves around him. He thinks of others. You don’t know—”

  “NO!” Bowie shouted, pointing a finger at me. “YOU don’t know. You never have. You choose to turn a blind eye to all his faults. Why is that, Gen? Why? He doesn’t deserve your loyalty. Is it because you want him? Is that it? He kissed you, and when that sent me away, he never once stepped in and made you his. He didn’t want you then. He doesn’t want you now. You will never have his love, and I am fucking over it. This is just the same as it was before, except this time, I SEE it. I’m not an idiot.”

  “Bowie, no,” I argued, starting to panic.

  He was misunderstanding all of this.

  He held up his hand to stop me from getting any closer to him. “Don’t. Not again. Just don’t,” he said in a calmer tone before turning and stalking off.

  I stood there, staring. His words replaying in my head. He was right. About all of it.

  The door to the apartment slammed closed, and I winced.

  I had done this to myself, and I had no explanation or excuse.

  I picked my phone back up and started to hit Kye’s number, then stopped myself. What would I tell him? Why was he the one I always went to? I had Quinn. She’d listen. She would eat Oreo ice cream with me and let me cry. But it was Kye’s arms I needed. Not ice cream.

  Giving in because I was weak and I needed to hear his voice, I pressed his number. It rang twice.

  “Baby Doll?”

  The sound of his voice set me off, and I let out a small sob.

  “Hey,” I managed to say.

  “What’s wrong? Where are you?” he demanded.

  “It’s okay. I just needed to hear your voice.”

  “You’re crying. It sure as fuck isn’t okay. No one makes you cry.”

  The fierce edge in his voice only made me cry harder.

  “Where are you?” he asked again.

  “Savannah.”

  “Did that bastard you’re dating make you cry?”

  I sniffled and closed my eyes tightly. “It was my fault. Not his.”

  “Fuck that,” Kye growled over the phone. “Where’s Quinn?”

  I wiped at my face while more tears ran down my cheeks. “In class.”

  “You got Oreo ice cream?” he asked.

  “Yes.”

  “Okay, this is what you’re going to do. Go get the ice cream. Get you a spoon. Take it to the sofa and curl up under that ridiculous, fluffy pink throw. Turn on Schitt’s Creek and watch it until I get there. Should take me a little under three hours.”

  I sniffled and wiped at my face. “No, you don’t need to come. I’m okay. Really. I just wanted to talk to you for a minute. I’ll be fine.”

  “I’m already in the car, Baby Doll. Have been since you let out that first sob.”

  I covered my face with my hand. “Kye, go back. I am okay.”

  “No.”

  “Kye!”

  “Baby Doll,” he replied, mimicking my tone.

  I sighed and stared at the wall. Deep down, hadn’t I known that he would come? He always came.

  That’s why you called him, Genesis. You can lie to yourself all you want, but when life blows up, you want Kye.

  “You can’t get here in three hours. That’s reckless.”

  “I was north of Gainesville.”

  At the strip club. I hated that I felt joy in the fact that I had the power to pull him away from a strip club so easily. I should never have called him.

  “Drive carefully.”

  “Always,” he assured me.

  I turned and headed for the kitchen with the phone pressed to my ear. “I’m getting the ice cream now.”

  “That’s my girl,” he said into the phone. “I’ll be there soon.”

  “Okay.”

  “Wear something sexy,” he teased.

  I couldn’t laugh, but I did smile a little. “My flannel pajama pants and your football T-shirt are gonna have to do.”

  “My high school one?” he asked.

  “Yes.”

  “Take off the flannel, and that’ll be better than porn.”

  This time, I did laugh.

  “That’s what I like to hear. I got my laugh. I’ll be there soon.”

  “Kye,” I said before he could hang up.

  “Yeah?”

  “Thank you.”

  “You need me, I’ll be there. Always.”

  We ended the call, and I took my ice cream and spoon to the sofa. I needed counseling. Something was off in my head when it came to Kye. My moods should not be affected by one person. Kye shouldn’t have that kind of power over me. Bowie had said some hurtful things, but they were true. Kye wasn’t ever going to want me that way. The more I let him in like this, the more pain I was causing myself.

  Bowie had hurt me, but it had been my fault. I’d asked for it. I just didn’t know how to fix it. Having Kye come here wasn’t the right way to do it. Or maybe it was. While he was here, I could tell him about Bowie. Then have Bowie come over. Apologize. Tell him I was sorry.

  I thought about it some more, then shook my head. That wasn’t going to work either. No matter that this was my fault, it was very possible that Kye would kill Bowie for making me cry. I had to think of another way.

  Five

  Kye

  September 20

  “That’s it, sugar,” I groaned as Echo sucked my dick.

  Normally, I didn’t like for brunettes to suck me off. When I was in the heat of the moment, my imagination would take over and turn them into Genesis. Echo’s purple streaks in her hair kept that from happening. They were near the ends though, so I kept her hair fisted in my hand so that I could see the difference. She also didn’t have those caramel highlights in her hair, like Genesis.

  This was the second time I’d gotten sucked by Echo without Levi taking his leather belt to her ass at the same time. He’d gone and gotten a taste of Aspen, the younger sister of a stripper we used to enjoy, who had been killed this summer in a gang fight. Levi saved Aspen, brought her back to the house, and instead of making sure she was safe and then getting her moved into a new place, he kept her. To protect her. In his bed. After that, the impossible happened. He’d stopped fucking around. Just Aspen now, and, damn, I was horny as fuck, having to listen to it just down the hall every day.

  I slammed my dick further down Echo’s throat. Didn’t bother her. She made these hungry sounds, like she couldn’t get enough of it. The woman was by far the best at sucking cock. Her pointy nails bit into my things, and I liked the little bit of pain, along with her vacuum cleaner–like mouth. I held her still while I began to spurt my cum down her throat.

  “Fuck, that was good,” I praised her.

  Next, I’d bend her over and fuck her hard, the way she liked it. The girl would beg pretty for it too. I enjoyed letting her beg for my pierced dick before giving it to her.

  Once I was done, she ran her tongue over my magic cross piercing. That was always the one that women were most interested in seeing. Most of them had only seen a Prince Albert on the cockhead. Seeing two rods that crossed each other instead excited them. Even with the condom on, they got some pleasure from it.

  Genesis’s ringtone went off, and my head snapped up from watching Echo lick my metal to find where I had set my phone down. It was on the chair closest to me. I pushed her head away, then let go of her hair quickly and went to grab my phone before it rang a third time.

  “Hey!”

  Leaving her back in Savannah had been hard. She was so fucking upset about the dickhead she was dating. He didn’t return her calls or text messages. I’d only been able to stay for two days before Blaise called and ordered me back.

  “Kye.” She was crying.

  Motherfucker. I was gonna kill this bastard. I’d make Quinn tell me his name. Genesis wanted to protect him from me, but I was over it.

  “What’s wrong, Baby Doll?” I asked gently, walking over to grab my boxers and get them on while she talked. Looked like I was driving north tonight.

  She let out another sob. “It’s my dad,” she choked out.

  Holy fuck. No. My heart started racing as I hurried and got dressed.

  “What’s wrong?” I asked, afraid for her to say more.

  I couldn’t get to her fast enough if something had happened to her dad. She’d need me right fucking now.

  “He had a stroke.” She let out another sob. “Mom called me. They’re at the hospital.”

  He wasn’t dead. He could live after a stroke.

  “Okay, listen. I’m coming. Do not try to drive like this.” I was already at the door, about to leave.

  “You’re leaving? Seriously?” Echo asked from behind me.

  I turned and glared at her. Making it clear that she needed to shut the fuck up. Genesis did not need to hear her. Then, I swung open the door and left.

  “Quinn is driving me. We are already on the road. Just meet me there. Please. Go check on Mom. She’s alone.”

  “I am getting on my bike now. I’ll be there with her. Tell Quinn to drive carefully. I’ve got this,” I assured her.

  She sniffled this time, and I seemed to calm down. I wished I had driven a car so I could keep talking to her. The bike would make that impossible.

  “Thank you. I’m sorry if you were busy.”

  I winced. She’d heard Echo. Dammit! Not that she didn’t know I fucked around. She knew me better than anyone. It was just that it felt wrong—her hearing the woman I was with when she was so upset and needed me.

  “I’m never too busy for you. You know that, Baby Doll. Never.”

  Her breathing was stuttered, as if she was trying not to cry some more. “Tell Mom I love her, and I love you too.”

  I threw my leg over the Harley. I’d finally paid Huck the last payment on it and could call it mine. “Love you, Baby Doll.”

  When I ended the call, I slipped my phone into my pocket, then took off to the hospital in Ocala. This was not the way I wanted to get Genesis home or how I wanted to see her, but, damn, knowing she’d be here soon did feel good. Nothing could happen to her dad though. It would destroy her.

  That stupid piece of shit who had broken up with her was left back there while I was here to make sure my girl would be okay.

  I stood, looking out over the lit parking lot from the window of the waiting room. Alice, Genesis’s mom, had finally been allowed to see her dad, Theo.

  Alice had been so relieved when she saw me that she threw her arms around my neck and wept. It had been heartbreaking. Growing up, I had known my parents didn’t care much for each other, but I’d gotten to watch Alice and Theo. It had always made me happy to know that Genesis had them. That she got to experience having two parents who loved each other. They were good people.

  “Kye!” Genesis’s voice called, and I spun around as she came rushing into the waiting room. Her eyes were red and swollen from crying as she made her way to me. “Where is Mom? Is Dad okay? What have they said?” She shot off her questions frantically.

  I cupped her face in my hands, hating to see how much crying she’d done. “Your mom got to go see him, but just for a moment. He has to go into surgery now that they have the bleeding under control. The doctor called it a hemorrhagic stroke. He had an aneurysm burst. They are going to have to go in and repair the broken blood vessel. But that’s the good news. That they can repair it and get to it.”

  She pressed her face to my chest and sucked in a deep breath. I wrapped my arms around her just as Quinn entered the room.

  “What happened?” she asked in a whisper. Her eyes went from the back of Genesis’s head to meet my eyes.

  “He’s going to be okay. He’s got to have surgery to repair the blood vessel that ruptured. Alice is with him now, but the doctor said she’d only get to see him a few minutes.”

  Quinn’s shoulders sagged in relief, and the worry in her gaze as she looked back at Genesis was clear. She called herself the backup best friend, and she fucking was. She wasn’t taking my place. But I was thankful Genesis had her.

  I looked back down at Genesis and held her tighter. “What can I get you? Have you eaten anything?” I asked her.

  She sniffled and shook her head, then turned her head to lay her cheek against my chest. “No. I can’t eat.”

  “Thirsty?” I asked.

  She didn’t respond at first, then finally nodded. “Yeah. Water would be good.”

  Quinn held up a hand. “I’ll get it. That’s the calmest she’s been since she got the call. Keep doing whatever it is you’re doing. I’ll go get us all water.”

  I nodded. “Thanks.”

  She turned and left the room. I ran my hand over her back, trying to soothe her any way I could.

  “Your mom was there. She recognized the symptoms and called 911 immediately. The doctor said her fast thinking was going to mean a big difference in his recovery.”

  Genesis leaned back enough to look up at me. “He could have died,” she whispered. “That’s all I keep thinking.”

  “He didn’t though. That’s what you need to keep thinking. He is going to live.”

  She gave me a sad smile. “Why does hearing you say it make it easier to believe? You’re not a doctor.”

  I leaned down and kissed the tip of her nose. “Because you know I’d bring down death, God, and anything else that tried to take someone you loved away from you.”

  A soft laugh escaped her, and she shook her head. “As crazy as that sounds, for some reason, I believe it.”

  I fucking hoped it was true. Right now, I would say just about anything to ease her fear.

  “I got waters!” Quinn announced.

  Genesis let go of me and turned to her other friend as Quinn walked over to her with a bottle in her hand.

  “You look better,” Quinn told her. “Seems Kye has magical abilities.”