“I didn’t know I was going to do it until I did it, Beck. I wasn’t planning on it at first, before the competition. I thought you were right, I should keep practicing and get it nailed down and tight before the X Games for the big reveal. But after Thursday’s prelims I couldn’t stop thinking about it. And then it just kind of happened.” She shrugs, and then she’s unclasping her bra.

  My mouth goes dry and my body responds instantly to her nakedness, even before she starts shimmying out of her jeans and underwear. “You still trying to decide if you’re mad?” she asks just before the final piece of clothing is tossed aside and she’s completely nude.

  “Uh, mad? No, not mad anymore.”

  “Good, take your pants off.”

  “Yup, sure, I can do that.”

  I feel her soaking in every inch of me with her eyes just as I am doing to her. When I remove the last of my own clothing, I close the distance between us. My lips and hands can’t decide which part of her body they want contact with most. Jordan’s mouth and hands are equally greedy, searing my chest and shoulders, biceps, and abs with their touches. She doesn’t stop until I’m on my knees, my face between her legs and my hands on her ass. Her hands rest on my head, fingers twined in my hair. It doesn’t take long before her legs begin to shake and I’m supporting her weight, watching under my eyelashes as her head drops back. One of these days we’ll be alone and she won’t have to hold back the sounds I want to hear. But the visual of Jordan losing herself like this is enough, for now.

  Guiding her to the bed, I let her hazy eyes come back into focus as I hover on my elbows above her. “Everyone’s talking about what you did on Saturday in Vancouver. There was more talk about you and your 720 at the meetings this morning than there was about the collaboration.”

  Jordan blinks a few times. “We’re still talking about this?”

  “I decided on how I felt about missing out on seeing it in person, and it’s not that I’m mad at you. It’s that I’m jealous of everyone else who got to witness it. They’re all bragging about it on social media, talking about you and your performance like they know you better than I do, and I don’t like it.”

  I’m only able to say this aloud because she’s still looking slightly dazed.

  “You’re jealous? But Beck, you’ve seen me land a 720, you were the first one to see it. That’s a weird thing to be jealous about,” she murmurs, even as her hands move between us. I can’t hide the hard length bobbing around between our bodies.

  “I know. I guess I need to get used to having a famous girlfriend.” She’s figured out how to handle being with me, and now it’s my turn.

  Jordan’s eyes widen slightly like it’s finally hitting her this boost in stardom might not be a temporary blip. “I should be the one with mixed feelings about it. A year ago any attention I didn’t ask for was a negative thing. But now? Now it’s different.”

  “You asked for it though, didn’t you? And that’s not a bad thing. You knew what the outcome would be if you showed the world what you’re capable of.”

  “Yeah, that’s the difference. I wanted to hide it before, but now, I know that if I’m going to be with you…” I can’t hide my glower at the word “if.” Jordan tilts up the side of her mouth, recognizing her poor word choice. “Since I’m with you and that won’t be changing,” she amends, “I will get attention one way or the other. So I want it to be on my terms. I want it to be indisputable that I belong in the pro circuit, not because Griff is doing you a favor, or anything like that, but because I can do tricks no other girls can do.”

  She’s wiggling as she explains all this, shifting up on the bed, widening her legs, and now wrapping them around my waist. I’m trying real hard to maintain concentration on the conversation, but as she guides me to her entrance, I give up my efforts. Sliding inside, I tell her one more thing before the sensations wipe out my ability to speak coherently. “You might have the world’s attention now for your skateboarding prowess just like you intended. They might not even care who your boyfriend is anymore. But you were my Hotshot first. And you always will be.”

  Chapter Sixteen

  Jordan

  “Beck! You can’t say that on international television!” I’m sputtering as I jump out of my seat on the couch in our condo.

  Zora smacks my leg from her spot on the other couch. “Sit down!” she hisses. “It’s not over yet.” I glance at the rest of my roommates, entranced by Eileen and Beck talking about me on the screen. I can’t decide where to look, and after shooting a glare at the real Beck, who looks way too smug, I turn my attention back to the screen. Eileen says something nice about me, which makes me soften just a tad, but I’m still too wired to sit back down.

  Beck just said he wants to marry me! On the Eileen Delarosa Show! It’s a good thing I already embraced my newfound fame on my own terms, because if I hadn’t gotten attention from the 720, I’d be getting it for that statement. In fact, we’ve saved it for viewing until tonight, but this show aired at the same time I landed my 720. I know all the buzz I’ve seen has been about that trick and not Beck’s declaration on television, but still, I can’t fight the unease settling in my stomach. Beck tugs my hand until I stumble backward into his lap.

  “Hey, I’m not sorry,” he says quietly. “I had to hide what you meant to me for way too long, I’m not going to walk on eggshells about it anymore.”

  “You don’t have to walk on eggshells,” I grit out. “But you don’t have to be so… so…” I can’t think of the word to describe just how jaw dropping his words were: “I’d marry her tomorrow…”

  “Honest? Real?”

  “Beck, we haven’t even talked about marriage yet, how can you talk about it on television like that?”

  “But we have talked about it. Remember?”

  I do remember, it was discussed at his dad’s wedding, but we’d been together a month or so at that point, and I didn’t think either of us were seriously discussing it. Wait, back up. “Honest? You’d really marry me tomorrow if I dragged you to the courthouse?”

  Beck nods, his eyes boring into mine as the amusement at my outrage fades. “Yeah, but don’t worry, I’ll wait as long as you need me to.” He frowns. “Well, I might start trying to manipulate you into it if you’re still dragging your feet in ten years or so, but I’m confident I’ll have a ring on it by then.”

  I hear a camera phone click and swing my eyes to Ellie, who’s grinning with no remorse. “I’m sorry, was that supposed to be a private moment? You two are so damn cute. Do I have your permission to post this and tell the world this is what happened after you heard Beck tell Eileen he’s going to marry you?”

  “Cool with me,” Beck says.

  “No!” I protest, but I’m laughing now. “I don’t want Beck’s undying love for me to overtake my 720! I need to be known for skateboarding, people!” I throw my fist in the air to make my point.

  Ellie just coos. “I can already picture the wedding. Jordan in a wedding dress riding her skateboard. Beck in a tux, dropping into the half pipe.” She sighs.

  “Are you going to let us help plan the wedding?” Lucy asks.

  “You guys, I just turned nineteen. I’m not planning a wedding.” But man, they do have me thinking… about someday, years from now. Right? I think? No rush.

  As if reading my mind, Beck squeezes my hips. “No rush. I’m not going anywhere.”

  It’s late and with all of us with class or work in the morning, I let them tease us a little longer about our future wedding before we all head off to bed. Beck heads back to Jay Beach tomorrow for the rest of the week, and I’ve still got a ton of schoolwork to catch up on after being out of town. I thought I might get some done in Vancouver but it didn’t really happen.

  “I don’t want to go back to real life,” I complain after we brush our teeth and snuggle in bed.

  “Real life? It all seems pretty good to me. I just don’t want to go another couple days without seeing you, but at least we got tonight.”

  “It’s just hard to focus on classes and school after the weekend I had. I probably won’t get to really skateboard again until I’m back in Jay Beach on Friday.” All I want to do is keep riding the high from my accomplishment, but instead I need to study the principles of microeconomics.

  “Yeah, that’s why it took me seven years to get my degree,” Beck says with a soft laugh. “I’m glad I did though. Not only did buckling down that last semester mean I met you, but I’m more prepared for this position at Brazen. I’m taken more seriously by others in the industry.”

  “I don’t even know what I want to major in,” I admit.

  “That’s okay. It took a while for me to realize I wanted to shift to business so I could have a different kind of career in skateboarding without being a pro forever. You’ll figure it out.”

  Sighing, I snuggle closer into his chest. “Yeah, maybe.”

  “Once Griff started talking about his plans for Brazen, that helped too. But I did get sidetracked quite a bit,” he adds, stroking my arm up and down.

  “Yeah, is it bad I already feel the pull to be sidetracked?” I whisper my question, embarrassed. “I mean, you were the world champion and I’m a brand new pro, so it’s not the same, but…” I let out another long sigh. “Maybe it’s the newbie excitement, I don’t know. All I wanted to do before was skateboard but now it’s even worse, if that’s possible. I want to skateboard with a purpose, plus I want to compete.”

  “It’s not bad to want that. Why would it be bad?”

  I think about his question, wanting to be honest but also not wanting to offend him. I’ve already pointed out the differences in our situations if it wasn’t already obvious – he was a real pro when he took time off from college while I sometimes feel like I only broke into that space two days ago. “I guess it feels indulgent. Irresponsible. Not to mention, I’m not making near enough from Brazen so I’d have to get a job anyway. Might as well use that time to keep after my degree.”

  “Oh, you’ll be getting all kinds of calls from sponsors soon. Especially after you kill it at the X Games next month. If you wanted to make a living from skateboarding, I bet you’ll be able to soon.”

  I’ve already been contacted by a bunch of sponsors, in person in Vancouver and by email or phone or social media today. When I tell Beck this, he says I’ll need an agent to help me navigate everything. “But not Vienna. I’m not planning on firing her, but I’m not going to send her new business.”

  “It’s all happening so fast. I don’t want to get caught up and make mistakes. I just want to keep getting better at skateboarding, have fun at the competitions, and if I’m going to get noticed, get noticed for that, not for being with you.”

  “Are you ashamed of me?” Beck makes it sound like he’s teasing, but I sense something else in his tone too.

  “Um, no, obviously not.” How could he think that?

  “I get why you want that. But I can’t help being proud of being with you and I’m not going to apologize for talking about you and being transparent about my feelings for you.”

  I lift my head up to look at him. “Okay. That’s fair. But I’m not going to apologize either for asking for more time to establish myself as a serious skateboarder. Maybe once I do that I’ll be more comfortable gushing about you when Eileen invites me on her show.”

  Beck gives me a reassuring kiss on my forehead. “Good. Now let’s go to sleep. You still have school tomorrow, Hotshot.”

  He’s right. I’m still a fulltime student. But I feel like he’s also given me permission to imagine other possibilities than the one I’ve always assumed would be my path the next few years. If things continue in the course they’ve taken these past couple of days, maybe I’ll take a more meandering path like Beck did. He seems to have landed right where he wants to be, and while looking to my boyfriend as a role model might make feminists around the world cringe, it doesn’t bother me like it once might have. After all, it’s not as if I actually agreed to marry him tomorrow.

  Chapter Seventeen

  Beck

  It’s Saturday night at the Jay Beach house, and I can’t help but notice how long it’s been since Griff brought a woman around. All of us are sitting on the back deck, the evening just cool enough to justify turning on the gas fire pit. Zora and Brie are sharing the only love seat. Jordan’s between my legs on a lounge chair. And Ellie is curled up on Taylor’s lap. Griff’s on my other side, seemingly content on his own.

  I pass him one of the cold beers I just got from the fridge. “Hey man, you haven’t been bringing anyone around and you aren’t going out on the weekends from what I can tell. You got a secret girlfriend or what’s up?”

  Griff smirks. “You noticed that, huh? Didn’t know you were keeping track of me.”

  “We’ve been roommates a while now and I might not pay close attention, but I know there’s usually someone passing through every week or two.”

  Griff laughs quietly. “Passing through? Nice way to put it.”

  “You know, some woman I run into on the way in or out of our place, but never see again.”

  Looking around, I wonder if it’s because we’ve all coupled off and Griff doesn’t want to give women the wrong impression if he brings them around to hang out with our crew. “Is it because none of us are going out with you anymore and we don’t really have parties around here?” We have people over, sure, but it doesn’t extend much beyond our closer circle, which isn’t ideal for Griff’s hook-up agenda. That is, if he still has a hook-up agenda.

  Griff shoots me a pointed look. “Dude, if I wanted to meet women without giving them the wrong impression of long-term potential, I know how to find them.”

  Ah, okay, still the same Griff then. “So why haven’t I seen any?” I also know he’s perfectly capable of not only meeting women but bringing them home with him when he puts his mind to it. Maybe he’s been going to their places instead. But then again, he’s always hanging around with us.

  Griff glances beyond me and I turn to confirm he’s checking if Jordan is listening. She is. Jordan smiles and shrugs.

  “Yeah, I’m eavesdropping. I was wondering the same thing.”

  “You guys aren’t going to like my answer,” Griff warns us.

  “Please don’t tell me you’re secretly dating Fliss or Sydney,” Jordan warns.

  Griff winces but before I can jump to a conclusion, he says, “No, definitely not. But razzleydazzles, aka the future Mrs. Griffin Perry, is still messaging me all kinds of weird stuff on Instagram.”

  “Why don’t you block her?” I ask.

  “Because I feel like at some point, she’s going to reveal she’s really Fliss, or give something away to identify herself. Then we can put it all to rest.”

  Jordan leans forward in her chair and steals my beer. “What kind of weird stuff?” She takes a long sip and hands it back.

  Griff’s eyes move to the fire. “Just all the reasons she’s obsessed with me. Admires me. Some of the stuff on its own is the same as messages or comments I get from regular fans.” He looks back at us and rubs his jaw. “But then she’ll add some comment about why whatever trait she’s pointed out makes me a perfect match for her. Why we’re destined for each other.”

  There’s a beat of silence while Jordan and I process this. “She say anything about Jordan?” I press.

  “Not really.”

  “Not really?” I don’t mean to sound so biting, but he knows if it pertains to Jordan’s safety, he better not be keeping it from me.

  “She tried to ask me about Jordan, if I had my heart broken by her, or if I was still pining for her. That was the only message I almost responded to. I wanted to shut that down real quick. It was shortly after you two went public.”

  “No mention since?” I clarify.

  “No, man.”

  “I’m sorry Griff, that sucks,” Jordan tells him. “I know how messages like that can get in your head.”

  I wait for Griff to deny that it’s really bothering him, assume he’ll say he’s only checking them to try to pin down who she is. But he rubs a hand over his jaw again and lets out a defeated breath. “Yeah, so, that’s actually why I’m not going out meeting women. Why no one’s been ‘passing through,’ as you put it, Beck.”

  “Wait, it’s because of the messages?” I don’t hide my confusion. I’m not following.

  “I know I might sound crazy, and maybe I am, but sometimes I think I’m being watched.”

  I dart my eyes to Jordan, suddenly concerned for her. It wasn’t so long ago the person behind this razzleydazzles account took a picture of Jordan going into our old apartment. Either she was waiting for Griff to come or go and Jordan happened to be there, or she was following Jordan.

  “You’ve seen someone or noticed anyone following you?”

  “Nah, that’s the thing. I’ve never actually seen anyone, it’s just a feeling. And while the messages show this person knows a lot about me, she could have learned it from digging around social media, the Brazen website, stuff like that. She’s either careful not to mention she’s spying on me, or she’s not spying on me and I’m just going crazy.”

  “I don’t think you’re crazy. But I still don’t get why you can’t go out and hook up with people,” Jordan voices my own thoughts. Griff isn’t scared of this chick, is he?

  “You think you’ll accidentally hit on your stalker?” I guess.

  “No, not that.” Griff’s chuckle is dark. “I’m pretty confident it’s Fliss. She gives off all the warning bells every time I’ve run into her.” He shakes his head, and it’s distressing seeing my laidback friend worked up like this. “No, I’m not meeting women or hooking up with them because I don’t want this stalker to know about them. I saw the way Fliss looked at Jordan at the airport. Remember?”