Offering the drinks had accomplished exactly what Sábria intended. Jenx regained some of her equilibrium and was taking back a tiny bit of control she thought she’d lost. “Yes, I’d like one.” Sábria raised a questioning brow to Shirin. Her second was always quick on the uptake and knew exactly what Sábria was trying to accomplish with Jenx. When she nodded that she’d like some wine, Sábria repeated, “Good, three glasses will be perfect.”

  She and Shirin took their seats, and while Jenx picked out the glasses, uncorked the wine, and poured, Sábria tried to bring her temper back under control. She at least needed to hide it from her Blade, who’d misinterpreted her mood and had taken the blame for Farry’s actions completely onto herself.

  The array of wine glasses hanging upside-down beneath the horizontal wine rack was an impressive collection of gifts given to many Arch Priestess’s over the turns. There were those with large bowls and long stems used for Sábria’s red wines, fishbowls for her burgundies, taller glasses, glasses with wide bowls but smaller openings, tulip glasses, and many, many more.

  True to her elite, upper-class upbringing, Jenx chose the correct narrow-bowled glasses with narrow openings, which would ensure that too much air didn’t compromise the light flavors of the white Tafonti wine.

  Sábria accepted the glass and admired the medium straw color of the spirits produced in her Temple in Frayam. “You chose the perfect glass for Lady Resart’s signature wine.”

  As Shirin took a glass from Jenx, she unobtrusively studied her, idly wondering whether her Blade would realize all of the small things Sábria was doing to rebuild her confidence and assuage her wounded pride. She turned her attention to her Arch Priestess, who had the ability to heal even the smallest emotional wounds without the person ever realizing her actions were deliberate. She often stopped problems from materializing before most people realized they were headed down a dark path of self-doubt or reproach. And most of the time, she did so without thought, somehow knowing instinctively how to handle any given set of circumstances.

  Sábria took a sip and savored the wine before swallowing. Once everyone was seated, she set her wine down and leaned back in her chair. “Not all nobles care to take the time to learn which glasses are for which wines. Most simply rely on their wine stewards to bring their beverage of choice in the correct glass. Where did you learn the skill?”

  A slight smile ghosted across Shirin’s lips. Sábria knew perfectly well where Jenx had learned the skill. She was simply doing what she did best as she tended to the wounded pride of one of her Blades.

  A dusting of pink rose into Jenx’s cheeks at the compliment. She took a sip as well but chose to hold her glass in her hand while she spoke. “If you remember, My Lady, my family owns several vineyards in the north. My father made it a game at the dinner table. Everyone, including my mother, would take turns being blindfolded, and my father would hand us a glass, and we’d have to guess what type of wine it should hold. He’d then fill the glass with the correct wine, and we’d taste it and tell him if we’d been right or wrong with our guesses. If we’d been wrong, we’d have to identify exactly what he’d put in our glass.”

  Sábria chuckled, “Sounds like you’d have been a good fit in Frayham. High Priestess Resart is always looking for likely candidates to help in her vineyards.”

  A cloud passed over Jenx, but Shirin guessed Sábria’s intention was to swing the conversation back to Ailith, and talking about a transfer to Frayham would do just that.

  Jenx took a larger swallow this time. “Maybe that’s where I belong. If I can’t even handle a shiv, I don’t belong here at the temple with the elite Blades, do I?”

  “Jenx, look at me.” Sábria waited for her to do so before continuing. “When you said Ailith didn’t trust you enough to help her figure out a solution to what Lady Farryn was asking of her, I think you’re misreading the situation. As you know, Ailith practically raised herself from the time she was around seven turns old. She’s not like most of our shivs, at least not like the ones who come to us in their teens. Independence was thrust on her. She never had to fight for it, just the opposite, in fact. So, I don’t hold that independence against her, but at this point in her life, both Commander Shirin and I, along with Prime Geller, Terro, and you, do try to control it. Not always successfully, either.”

  Shirin let out a snort and raised her brows. “Not even close, but she is getting better about relying on us when she needs help.”

  Sábria agreed, “Yes, she is, but the salient point here, Jenx, is that Ailith didn’t believe she needed help. A noble asked her to do something she felt equipped to do, so she did it. Yes, very few other shivs would have the self-confidence to do anything like that without going and asking their handler for help. I don’t believe that thought ever occurred to Ailith. She wasn’t trying to deceive you. She even told you she was going to Lady Farryn’s home after her shift. In true Ailith fashion, something needed doing, so she did it. While we’d all like to pile on and beat the skin off her back, that would be a mistake of colossal proportions. Yes, I intend to talk to her, but punish her?” She lifted a shoulder, “That will depend on the outcome of the interview.”

  The room was quiet while the three sipped their wine and considered her words. Sábria watched her Blade from beneath lowered brows. She knew Jenx was someone who tended to mull over things before acting. But the fact that she’d tried to tender her resignation was an indication of larger problems they needed to address. After a while, she broached what she thought might be happening with her Blade. “She can be a handful.”

  Jenx raised her brows and scoffed, just as Shirin had done moments before.

  Amusement crept into Sábria’s gaze, but then she schooled her features before continuing. “When Ailith first came, I thought long and hard about whom I wanted as her handler. In my mind, there were very few people suited to her personality, and you, obviously, were at the top of the list. Marne, on the other hand, never even made that list.” She smiled to soften the words because she never put down another Blade to any of her people. “Marne is suited to many things, but being a handler is not one of her strengths. It is, however, one of yours.”

  Jenx rolled her shoulders again, trying to loosen them. Hearing about Ailith’s actions had upset her more than it would have in the past.

  “That being said, I’ve noticed a tension in you that wasn’t there with any of the other shivs you’ve trained.”

  The deep, deep breath and resulting sigh said more about Jenx’s feelings than anything. “Lately, My Lady, I….” She didn’t want to admit weakness in front of the two most powerful women in the Temple.

  Sábria tapped the arm of her chair as she watched her Blade. “Since when are you reticent to talk to us? That’s something new, as well.”

  “I don’t know, My Lady. Usually, if I’m giving a report about a shiv, it’s about them, not me. But, lately, I feel like people are judging me for allowing Ailith enough rein to get into all the trouble she finds for herself.”

  Both Sábria and Shirin narrowed their eyes at that, but it was Sábria who finally asked, “You feel as though the Commander and I are judging you?”

  “No!” Jenx sat forward so fast the wine almost slopped over the rim. She made an effort to relax again and said with less force, “No, My Lady. The two of you have been perfect. Whenever I have an issue, I can come to you or Terro or Prime Geller, and we talk about what the issues are.”

  “So, other Blades, then? Or is it specific to other handlers?”

  “The other handlers, not so much. I think they all know how difficult it’s been for me to keep a handle on her. But the Blades…they haven’t specifically come right out and said anything, but they infer, or they stop talking when I walk by. I think it’s just…getting to me a little bit. That’s all. It’s nothing I can’t handle.”

  “I was planning to suggest this before the current problem arose, so I don’t want you thinking I’m suggesting it because you’ve failed in some way. That being said, you haven’t been home to visit your family in a couple of turns now. You’re so good at being a handler, I think we’ve taken advantage of that without giving you a long enough break in between Prita and Ailith.”

  Jenx grinned. “If I’d realized how easy training Prita, or any of the other people I’ve trained was, compared to Ailith, I would have been much more grateful for the experience. And, to be honest, I didn’t want to ask, but yes, I’m missing my family and would love to have some time to visit them. My sister had a third baby I’ve never met, and my parents aren’t getting any younger. But I know you count on me to train Ailith, too. I think maybe I was so ready to resign because, yes, I think I’m tired and really need a break, even if it’s only for a sevenday. But also, I’m still not sure I’m the right person for the job.”

  Sábria shook her head, “Actually, I was thinking more along the lines of a full moon or more if you feel you need it.” When Jenx’s gaze sharpened, Sábria held up a hand. “We all need breaks sometimes, and my philosophy is if someone takes the time to go home, they should have the opportunity to really shake off the stress and settle in. I find my Blades are much more ready to come back once the novelty of seeing their family has worn thin.”

  People had begun warming up for Geller’s pre-shift weapons practice, and the clanging sounds of sword hitting sword while Blades warmed their muscles drifted in through the open window. Sábria drank the last of her wine and stood. “I’d like you to intercept Ailith on her way to the practice yard. Bring her directly here, please. Commander Shirin will get with you about your much-needed time off, and she and I will discuss who’s to take your place with Ailith while you’re gone.”

  Jenx finished her wine as well and set it on the table. She came to attention and brought her fist to her chest. “Yes, Milady. And…I’m sorry I didn’t⁠—”

  “There’s no need for apologies. For whatever reason, Elyon thought our lives were getting dull and decided to bring us a wonderfully unique personality to train and learn to love as one of our own.” She put her hand on Jenx’s shoulder and squeezed, “We’ll get through this together. And whenever you’re feeling ostracized or judged, I’d like you to speak to someone, whether it’s Terro or Geller, Commander Shirin or me, we’re all here for you.”

  The nod was less enthusiastic than Sábria cared to see, and she made a mental note to pay a bit more attention to this handler/shiv pair than she’d done in the past. If a handler with as much experience as Jenx was feeling the pressure, that was a problem. Returning to her desk, she pulled the list of wounded Blades out of the stack of reports and began to read the healer’s notes on each of her injured warriors while she waited for Ailith to arrive.

  CHAPTER 6

  Ailith stood at attention in front of Sábria’s desk. She’d been in trouble enough in the past to recognize an angry posture when she saw one. Despite Sábria’s hand moving while she wrote, she held the rest of her body stiff and still. She didn’t look up in greeting when Ailith arrived, another warning sign since the Arch Priestess was nothing if not friendly when everything was going right.

  Waiting in silence when there was tension in the air wasn’t a strength Ailith could boast about, but with her handler standing by her side, it would be Jenx’s responsibility to say something if anything needed to be said.

  When Jenx had stopped her in the courtyard, she hadn’t mentioned why they had to see Sábria instead of going to weapons practice. On a normal day, Ailith slept until about two bells and then ran errands, ran the perimeter of the city, or practiced her reading until dinner, and then, after eating a good meal, would rest a couple of hours until weapons practice at nine before their shift started later that evening. Tonight, though, just like all the others in the last fortnight, she’d delivered the food to the Codpiece, gotten back around two bells, fallen into bed, and had awoken right before weapons practice.

  Except today, on the way to the practice yard, she’d been waylaid by Jenx, who’d brought her to the Citadel. That in and of itself was strange since Sábria usually left her office by six bells and either had dinner in her rooms or joined the Blades in the Courtyard. Yet here she was, writing something and apparently seething.

  When she finally laid down her quill and raised her gaze to meet Ailith’s, there was no question that whatever Ailith had done, it wasn’t good. She couldn’t help herself. Since she hadn’t been given permission to speak, her brows rose, silently begging the question of why she was standing in front of the Arch Priestess instead of swinging her blade in the yard.

  Sábria cocked her head and said in an irritated tone, “You look as though you have no idea why you’re standing here.” She allowed the anger she’d been holding back during her interview with Jenx to rise to the fore. Ailith needed to understand that what she’d done was absolutely unacceptable.

  Not sure whether or not that was a question, Ailith looked at the painting above Sábria’s head, weighing her options. Had she forgotten to do something she was told to do? Her eyes narrowed as she thought back to every order she’d been given in the last sevenday. The best she could come up with was, “Um.”

  The finger Sábria had been tapping on her desk stilled. “Um?”

  “Oh, um, no, Milady, I don’t know why I’m here and why yer lookin’ like a cow kicked over yer milk bucket. I mean, that’d get me toshed, too, that’s fer sure, but there ain’t no cows around, and I guess if there was, somebody else would be milkin’ ‘em and not you, but—” The stiff hand that shot up and stopped next to Sábria’s head helped Ailith realize she was babbling, so she bit her lower lip and shut up.

  The breath that came from Sábria’s nearly closed lips went on for much longer than it should have. “I understand you’ve been going to Lady Farryn’s villa after your shift.”

  “Oh. Aye.” Now that she had a clue about what was going on, some of Ailith’s confusion lifted.

  “And that she asked you to take food into the Codpiece.”

  “Aye.”

  “Without your handler.”

  Ailith blinked and stole a look at Jenx, who remained standing at attention, silent and still as a statue. “Well, it were off duty, and I knew she were tired, and th’ Lady asked me to help, not Jenx.” The tension in Sábria’s shoulders lifted them slightly, and when she stood, it seemed to Ailith that the only reason she’d decided to stand was because she was too tense to remain seated.

  “How many times have you been told to talk to your handler before doing something so monumentally stupid as to go into the Codpiece, during Festival, alone, with two…” she hit her desk with an open palm, “…full…” her other palm slammed down onto the hard wooden top, “…bags of food?” She leaned her full weight on her knuckles as she bent toward Ailith as though she fully intended to strangle her right then and there.

  Ailith almost stepped back at the fire blazing in Sábria’s eyes. “Well, I’ve never been told that since it’s never come up before, Milady.” Ailith hadn’t realized Sábria could rise up quite that tall or growl quite that loud, and the urge to step back, even though there was a desk between them, almost overcame her military training.

  She was surprised to hear the Commander say softly from somewhere back by the door, “Anyone else, My Lady, but I don’t think she meant that to sound quite as rude as it came out.”

  While Ailith didn’t understand what she meant, Sábria seemed to because she stared over Ailith’s shoulder at the Commander and then made a concerted effort to relax by moving her head from side to side and lowering her shoulders a fraction. She walked out from behind her desk, leaned against it, and crossed her arms. “Okay, let’s start with why you would do something so…” she pursed her lips and tried again, “…something like that.”

  Ailith shrugged, “Lady Farryn asked me to, and she’s yer friend, and that means she’s me friend, too, and she were that worried about th’ skellis and nints, and when she asked me to help feed ‘em,” she lifted a shoulder, “well, it were th’ right thing to do.”

  “Did it occur to you that I don’t even allow my Blades to go into the Codpiece alone, let alone my shivs?”

  “Well, durin’ their shift, aye, no one goes in alone. I knew that, but there’s no Blades what go there off-shift, so, no, it never crossed me mind since I’ve never seen no off-duty Blades down there, alone or no. Th’ skellis and nints needed feedin’, and I were th’ one what could get th’ food to ‘em. So I went.”

  When Sábria kept her arms crossed but lifted one hand to rub her temple, Ailith couldn’t help herself. “Milady, they’re starvin’ down there. Nobody cares, and when th’ Lady asked me, well, here were a noble what cared, and I couldn’t say no, could I? There’s no one else feedin’ ‘em, is there?” She put extra emphasis on her words as she repeated herself, “They’re starvin’.”

  Sábria spoke quietly this time. “We’ve tried in turns past, Ailith. At my request, the Seneschal had his cooks prepare kettles full of soup, which his palace guards took into the Codpiece. Every time the guards came to pick up the kettles, they were still full.”

  “Well, aye. If th’ skezzi guards had stuck around, they’d a known why.”

  Sábria raised angry blue eyes and stared into Ailith’s face. “And do you think any skelli or nint would come to get the soup if there were guards standing around?”

  “If them guards would of taken th’ time to get to know ‘em, to talk to ‘em, aye. But no, th’ only reason th’ assholes look fer ‘em is to get their rottin’ carcasses outta th’ street, ain’t it?”

  From behind her, the Commander growled, “Watch your language, Shiv.”

  Ailith squeezed her eyes shut and shook her head, “Oh, aye. Apologies, Milady.”