“You have to be able to live with whatever you choose. I’d focus on figuring out what that is.” A beach ball landed nearby. Sierra picked it up and tossed it back to two young boys. “How are you feeling about Quinn and your mom?”

  “Better,” she said. “But only because I like him.”

  “How often do you see him?”

  “This week? It’s been almost every day.”

  “So they’re getting closer.”

  “Seems like it.”

  “Do you think they’re sleeping together?”

  She wrinkled her nose. “Eww. Don’t ask. I don’t want that mental picture in my mind.”

  “Oh, stop.” She rolled her eyes. “Sex is just sex. It’s perfectly natural, no big deal. Does your mom seem happy?”

  Sometimes Sierra made her feel childish. She supposed her reaction had been childish. “A lot happier than before we got here.”

  “Then they’re probably sleeping together,” she joked.

  The ball landed next to Taylor this time. She tossed it back. “It’s nice that she’s always in a good mood these days, at least.”

  “That might be something to be thankful for when you have to tell her...what you have to tell her.”

  “True.”

  “Does Caden like Quinn, too?”

  “Definitely. They’re always messing around, throwing almost any kind of ball they can get their hands on, wrestling for the best spot on the couch, talking about sports. He even played some video games with Caden last night while my mom made dinner, which is something even our dad wouldn’t do. Our dad was too busy, would never take the time.”

  “That’s nice of Quinn.”

  “I think Caden misses having a dad more than he ever let on and likes having Quinn around, even if he isn’t our real father.”

  “I can understand that. There are times when I wish... Never mind.”

  “What?”

  “Nothing. I’m just saying that as long as Quinn’s a cool dude, what will it hurt to let him be part of the family? I believe any people who are willing to love each other can be a family, don’t you?”

  Once again Sierra had said something Taylor had never really considered but instantly felt was right. “I guess so.”

  “Besides, you told me he said he’d never try to replace your real father. Do you believe him?”

  “I do. He’s not pushy at all. He acts interested in us but he lets us decide how much to interact with him.”

  “Sounds nice to me.” They heard Caden call out to them from a distance and got up to see him and the others walking toward them. “Is Quinn’s mother going to die?” Sierra asked, her expression pained as though the question had been difficult to ask.

  “I think so. I believe he knows it, too.”

  When Sierra said nothing, Taylor wondered if she was thinking about her mother and tried to take her hand, but Sierra resisted. “You don’t want to hold my hand?” she asked in surprise. “You don’t mind holding it when we’re at home.”

  “We’re not at home,” she said. “It’s better not to give anyone any reason to open their big mouths.”

  Taylor knew she wasn’t worried about herself. Sierra didn’t care what people thought. Her father already knew what she was and most others had guessed. So Taylor grabbed her hand, anyway.

  “What are you doing?” she asked.

  “I don’t care what anyone says,” Taylor replied. “Being with you makes me happy.”

  26

  As Mary stood at the kitchen window, gazing out at the moon, she saw the light go on over the garage where her daughter was staying, even though it was late and the apartment had been dark for an hour or longer. Quinn snuck over so often Mary was afraid Caden and Taylor would catch him at some point, but she did her best to watch out for that, just in case she had to run interference.

  “Mimi?”

  At the sound of Taylor’s voice, Mary whirled around. “Yes?” She kept her voice low, so as not to wake Caden on the couch.

  “What are you looking at?”

  “Nothing.” Moving away from the window so that Taylor wouldn’t come any closer, she crossed over to her granddaughter. “I just...couldn’t sleep.”

  “Why not?”

  Because she was nervous about flying to Nashville tomorrow. Not only was she afraid to leave her comfort zone after so many years, she’d also never been on a plane. And she was going to meet someone she’d left behind so long ago she had no idea if she could trust that Tammy was still the same sweet person. “I’m not sure,” she said to Taylor, since she couldn’t be totally honest. “It happens sometimes. What are you doing up?”

  “I can’t sleep, either.”

  Mary could guess why. According to Caden, Taylor had come out today, in front of him and all his friends. She’d also brought Sierra home for supper and made it clear by her behavior—holding Sierra’s hand and curling up with her on the couch to watch a movie—that they were now a couple. “How are you feeling?”

  “Relieved.”

  Her response surprised Mary. She’d thought Taylor might be torn about what she’d done, maybe even regretful. “Relieved?”

  “Yeah. It felt good to quit worrying about what other people might think, and whether I’ll be stuck with this decision for the rest of my life, and just...act on what I feel, you know? Be spontaneous. Be me. Sierra and I have never had more fun.”

  “How did the other kids treat you at the beach?”

  “They were fine with it. I’m pretty sure they’d already guessed. They were just surprised that we weren’t hiding it anymore.”

  Relieved herself, that her granddaughter wasn’t experiencing a great deal of angst and turmoil, she pulled Taylor in for a hug. “I’m glad, honey. You have to live your own truth. That’s what matters most. I’m proud of you.”

  Mary thought that would be that. Taylor would go back to bed, and she would be left to stew until it was time to leave for Richmond, so she could make her flight. But Taylor wasn’t smiling once Mary released her. Tears were swimming in her eyes as she said, “Don’t say you’re proud of me.”

  “Why not? It’s true.”

  “You don’t know everything yet.”

  “What are you talking about?” she asked, instantly concerned.

  “I have to tell you and Mom something. I wanted to wait until the end of the summer, but I can’t keep it to myself any longer. It’s getting to where I feel sick and worried and anxious all the time. I need help.”

  Mary glanced over her shoulder at the window she’d just been peering out. They couldn’t barge in on Autumn right now. “What are you talking about? Your mother’s fine with whomever you choose to love. So am I.”

  “This isn’t about that. It—it’s worse.”

  “Tay?” Caden lifted his head from where he was on the couch. “You’re going to tell them now?”

  “I have to,” she said. “I have to decide what to do and can’t manage that all by myself.” She started toward the French doors that would let her out, so she could cross the yard to the garage, but Mary cut her off.

  “Then let’s call your mom and have her come in. There’s no need for us to go traipsing out to the garage.”

  “I already tried to call her,” Taylor said. “She’s not answering.”

  Taylor obviously assumed her mother was asleep, but Mary knew better. “Why don’t you make some hot chocolate while I go get her, then? We’ll sit down as a family, since Caden already knows what’s going on, anyway. We’re here for you. Whatever it is, we’ll work it out.”

  “I don’t want any hot chocolate. I just want my mom,” she said with a fresh downpour of tears, and slipped around Mary to go get Autumn herself.

  * * *

  Taylor was relieved to see that there was a light on in the apartment over the garage. Maybe her mother wasn’t paying attention to her phone, but at least she wasn’t asleep.

  Although the door to the garage was locked, Taylor knew where to find the Hide-A-Key. It’d been under the glass frog in the planter ever since she could remember.

  She sniffed as she opened the case and let herself in. She couldn’t believe she was going to tell her mom about the baby. But she couldn’t keep going as she was, even if the summer wasn’t over. Oliver wouldn’t leave her alone. He called and texted her over and over, begging her to have an abortion.

  She couldn’t take the constant pressure. Just before bed, she’d received a nasty text from his older brother, telling her she’d better not ruin Oliver’s life, which proved he hadn’t kept his word. He’d told one person, at a minimum. And if he’d told his brother, there could be others—or soon would be.

  She had to talk to someone. Someone she trusted. Sierra made it possible for her to feel almost normal during the day. She could shove the pregnancy out of her mind and carry on as usual, pretend it didn’t exist. But at night, it was an entirely different story. After Sierra was asleep and the house fell quiet, the walls seemed to close in on her. Tonight the panic had been so intense she’d been frozen in her bed for the past hour.

  If revealing her sexuality today had taught her anything, it was that telling the truth brought relief. So she was going to face what she’d been dreading and get it over with. Maybe then she could have someone on her side, an adult like Oliver did, while she decided what to do about the baby.

  Breathe, she told herself. Although she dreaded what she had to do, at the same time, she suddenly couldn’t wait. She wanted to spill it all, drop the heavy burden she’d been carrying into her mother’s capable arms.

  The door to the apartment was closed, which was unusual. Taylor tried to walk in—but it wasn’t only closed, it was locked.

  “Mom?” she said with a knock.

  There was a thump and then some movement.

  “Mom?” Taylor called louder, trying to peer through the misted glass panels in the door. She thought she saw someone, but then the light went off.

  “Hey, what’s going on?” she asked.

  “Coming!” her mother replied.

  When the door opened, her mother was wearing a robe, from what Taylor could tell. Her hair seemed mussed, too, but Autumn left the light off so it was difficult to see very clearly. “It’s after one, Taylor,” she said. “What’s going on?”

  Taylor started to cry—not just cry but bawl like she hadn’t since she was a little girl. She didn’t care if she was being immature; she couldn’t help it. “I’m pregnant,” she sobbed, throwing herself into her mother’s arms. “I’m sorry. I’m so sorry. I didn’t mean to screw up my life. I don’t know why I slept with Oliver Hancock. I don’t even like him.”

  * * *

  Just hearing her daughter’s voice come through the door had almost given Autumn a heart attack. Quinn had barely had time to get up, grab his clothes and slip into the bathroom, where he was hopefully hiding in the shower, while she turned off the light so that Taylor couldn’t see two naked bodies spring into action. Painfully aware of her nudity under her robe, she tried to calm herself.

  Quinn had managed to get out of the room in time. But calming down proved futile when her daughter’s words began to sink in. “What’d you say?” she asked.

  Mary came hurrying up the stairs behind Taylor. “Why don’t we all come back to the house and have a cup of hot chocolate?” She sounded slightly desperate, and breathless besides, giving Autumn the impression her mother knew Quinn was over and had been trying to chase down Taylor before she barged in on them.

  Too bad she hadn’t been successful. That was Autumn’s first thought. But in her next thought, she realized how trivial that was in comparison to what her daughter had just revealed.

  “I’m going to have a baby,” Taylor repeated. She was clinging to Autumn so tightly that her words were muffled by Autumn’s robe, but there could be no mistaking them. It was essentially the same thing Taylor had said only seconds before.

  “Mom?” Caden called. “Mimi?”

  Her son was now clomping up the stairs. Soon, her mother, daughter and son would be in the small apartment—while Quinn was hiding in the bathroom. Autumn needed to get them all out, but she couldn’t think straight, couldn’t do anything except hold her sobbing daughter.

  “Did she just say pregnant?” Mary asked, her mouth hanging open as though she hadn’t been prepared for this news, either. “Can that be true?”

  Caden shoved a hand through his hair, which was already sticking up. “Yeah, it’s true,” he said.

  “How long have you known about this?” Autumn asked.

  “A while.”

  “How long has she known?”

  He shrugged. “A while longer.”

  “And you didn’t tell me?”

  “I couldn’t tell you,” he said. “I was pretty pissed off that it was Oliver who got her pregnant, but she begged me not to say anything.”

  The shock of this revelation had created a fog in Autumn’s mind. “Oliver Hancock is only sixteen.”

  “Yeah. He used to be my friend, remember?”

  The echo of that statement brought back the morning Caden had been so upset with Taylor. Now she knew this was why. At the time, she’d assumed their squabble was over Taylor’s sexuality—or Taylor’s general grumpiness because she was going through such a difficult time.

  Holy shit. What were they going to do? She was just beginning to adjust to the fact that her daughter was gay. How could Taylor be both gay and pregnant? While Autumn understood how that was technically possible, the combination had to be unlikely—in a seventeen-year-old, at least.

  “That’s why I was so upset,” Caden was saying.

  Autumn could feel the pressure of Taylor’s embrace but was otherwise numb, except for her hands and feet, which tingled. She’d just gotten over what’d happened to Nick, was finally happy again.

  “I think she should get an abortion, don’t you?” Caden blurted. “That would solve everything.”

  Autumn flinched. Just the word seemed to have sharp edges. “That’s not a decision to be made lightly. How did this happen?” She was asking Taylor, but once again, Caden answered.

  “How do you think it happened?”

  Autumn lifted a hand to signal for him to stop talking. She was already upset, and his involvement was only making matters worse.

  “Taylor?” She pulled back, catching her daughter’s face between her hands. “I need you to answer. Talk to me.”

  Even in the darkness, she could see the shine of tears on Taylor’s cheeks. Then Caden snapped on the light, making his sister’s misery even more apparent. “We were...we were at a party,” Taylor choked out, crying so hard she hiccoughed between some of the words.

  As Autumn listened to how Taylor had bumped into Oliver, that they’d been drinking, that he kept coming on to her, that she was hurt and angry even though she didn’t know why and that she finally went into the back bedroom with him, Autumn had to ask herself if she was partially responsible for this outcome. She’d been so preoccupied the past twenty months. Maybe if she’d been paying closer attention to what Taylor was doing this wouldn’t have happened. They’d discussed birth control, but that was back when Taylor had a boyfriend. “And Oliver didn’t use any protection?” she asked when the sad tale was over.

  Taylor pressed her face back into Autumn’s shoulder. “He didn’t have any. It wasn’t like...like we planned it.”

  Autumn was beginning to feel nauseated. What did this mean for her beautiful daughter? A pregnancy during her senior year. A baby before she graduated. What about college?

  “I’m sorry, Mom.”

  “It’s okay,” she said, but she was too shocked to speak with any real conviction. “Anyone can make a mistake.”

  “What are we going to do?” Taylor asked. “Oliver keeps texting me, begging me to get an abortion.”

  “Why not do it?” Caden asked. “Neither one of them is ready for a baby,” he added for Autumn’s benefit. He sounded so much like his father. She knew Nick, forever practical, would probably have said the same. He wouldn’t let anything get in the way of Taylor’s success.

  So did she follow what she knew he’d want? What she felt was right? Or what Taylor wanted?

  Her gut said it should be up to her daughter, but she was the one who would have to help shoulder the load, if Taylor decided to keep the baby. Shouldn’t she have a say, too?

  “There are...there are other options,” she said. “We’ll talk about them.” Despite her shock and upset, Autumn remembered Quinn, hiding in the bathroom, and wondered what he was making of all of this. “I—I think your Mimi was right. Let’s go over to the house and make some hot chocolate.”

  “How’s that going to help anything?” Caden asked.

  Again, he sounded a great deal like his father. “It’ll give me a moment to think—that’s what it will do,” she replied more candidly.

  It would also give Quinn a chance to escape...

  She was just looking for her slippers when she saw one of Quinn’s flip-flops lying on the floor not far from where they stood. He must’ve dropped it when he scooped up his things; he’d been moving fast.

  The sight of it caused her heart to jump into her throat. Fortunately, her mother must’ve spotted it at the same moment, because she slid over and nudged it under the bed.

  “Let’s go over while your mother gets dressed—er, finds her slippers,” her mother said and started to herd them down the stairs.

  Autumn didn’t wait for Quinn to come out so that she could speak to him. It had been far too close a call to let down her guard that quickly. She just tightened the belt on her robe, shoved her feet into her slippers and murmured, “I’ll call you tomorrow,” before hurrying out after them.