There’s nothing more to be said…only done. I crawl back up to his middle and lift myself up on my knees. I keep my eyes pinned on him as I grab his cock, watching the waves of ecstasy ripple through his system.

  I rub the tip against me, wetting the condom to make this as easy for me as it will be for him. Slowly, I insert the tip, dropping my body at an excruciatingly slow pace. He tightens his fingers even more on my thighs as his body stills and his eyes squeeze shut.

  “Breathe, baby,” I whisper, easing myself onto his cock until he’s fully inside.

  “Wait,” he begs before swallowing. “Give me a minute. Don’t move.”

  I still my body, watching his face and the easiness that washes over him for the first time since I laid eyes on him. He’s content and happy, something everyone deserves to be in their life.

  I run my hands over his chest before bending at the waist, wanting to kiss him again. He opens his mouth, welcoming my tongue and taste.

  He drags me forward with his hands, and my clit rubs against him, sending a current through my body. I moan into his mouth, wanting him to know how very good he’s making me feel.

  This is slow and sensual. Something I haven’t experienced with anyone else. Nevin’s different. He’s grown yet very much new and inexperienced. I’m aware of my prowess compared to his and how our feelings have been spinning out of control for weeks.

  This is about more than sex. This is about a connection. Something we share that no one else can understand. It’s a release for the feelings we’ve been bottling up with no means of escape.

  I grip his shoulders, keeping my mouth sealed to his as I glide forward. His hands never leave my body as I ride him, slow and gentle at first. The feeling of his cock moving in me, stretching me wide, has my body on fire and my clit begging for the orgasm it’s been missing.

  No matter how badly I want to move fast, I don’t. I ride him slowly in long strokes, drawing out everything as long as possible.

  The windows rattle as the storm passes over us, but I don’t care. The walls could come down around us, and I wouldn’t get off him, taking everything I can from this beautifully flawed man.

  It doesn’t take long before he’s pulling and pushing my thighs quicker, wanting and needing more than the torturous pace I’ve been setting. I give in, letting him control the speed, but grinding and moving the way I like. The way I know will tip me over the edge.

  Within seconds, he’s moaning, his body spasming underneath me. I’m not there yet, but something is missing. He lifts his hand, using his thumb on my clit, pulling me over with him. I scream out his name, milking his cock of every drop as the orgasm crashes over me, finally stealing my breath.

  I collapse forward, plastering my body to his front with his cock still inside me. I pant, trying to fill my lungs with the oxygen they so badly need.

  “Fuck,” he mutters as he wraps an arm around my back.

  “Bad?” I ask him, not bothering to look up.

  He moves his fingers up and down my back, following my spine. “The fucking best.”

  “It was amazing,” I say back, knowing my part was just above average. There was no extra spice or sizzle, but soft and sweet…something I’m not used to. “I’m so tired.”

  “Close your eyes, li’l moon. Sleep,” he says softly, stroking my back even more gently.

  I do as he says, closing my eyes and listening to the steady beat of his heart and feeling safe for the first time in a long time.

  When I open my eyes again, the sunshine is sneaking through the cracks in the plywood. I scrunch my nose and squeeze my eyes shut again to block out the light. “Is it over?” I ask, feeling the unfamiliar warmth pressed against me.

  “Yes. We made it.”

  “Thank fuck. Power still on?” I ask, praying that we’re not thrown back into the Stone Age for God knows how long.

  “Power never went out.”

  I relax into him, pressing my back as flat as I can against his front. “Did you sleep?”

  “For a few minutes here and there.”

  “I slept like a baby,” I told him.

  He chuckles, tightening his arm around my waist. “I know. I heard.”

  I groan. “I do not snore.”

  “You do, and you talk in your sleep.”

  I roll onto my back, staring at him in disdain. “I do not snore, nor do I talk in my sleep.”

  He gives me a smug smile, tracing his finger across my collarbone as he holds his head up with the palm of his propped-up arm. “Yeah, you do, babe.”

  “What did I say, then?”

  “You mumbled something about being happy. It was like you were talking to someone, but it wasn’t me.”

  I close my eyes, remembering the most vivid parts of my dreams. “I saw Ian in my dream last night. That’s weird, right?” I ask him. “Maybe he’s trying to make us feel guilty.”

  “Babe, unless he teleported out of jail, I’d say it wasn’t really him and he doesn’t really give a shit.”

  “Don’t be a smartass.” I reach up, pinching his cheek. “Do you feel guilty?”

  His eyebrows draw in, and he looks at me like I have three heads. “For what? Sleeping with you?”

  “Well, yeah.”

  He laughs. “No, Lu. I don’t feel an ounce of guilt or remorse about what happened. Quite the opposite. Do you feel guilty?” he asks me.

  “No. Not really.”

  He smiles softly. “Not really means you do a little.”

  “Maybe a little.”

  “Why?”

  “I feel guilty for being so happy when Ian isn’t. You know?”

  Nevin hauls me against his side as he rolls onto his back. “Babe, would Ian want you to feel guilty?”

  I place my hand on Nevin’s chest, nuzzling into his side. “No. He wouldn’t want me to stop living.”

  “Do you love him?”

  “I love him, but I am not in love with him. We don’t have that type of relationship.”

  “What type is it, then?” he asks me, stroking my back again like he did last night.

  “I never did this with him.”

  Ian and I had sex a handful of times. None of them involved cuddling or sleeping afterward. We went our separate ways or went for a drink afterward. We realized we were better off as friends and nothing else. Neither of us had the emotional capacity for anything beyond the physical.

  “Did what?” Nevin asks.

  “Snuggled.”

  “Never?”

  “Never.”

  “I like that,” Nevin says.

  I look up, staring at his handsome face. “That makes you happy?”

  He smiles. “Yeah. If that makes me a dick, I’m a dick, but I’m happy I had something with you he never has.”

  I close my eyes, still overcome with guilt and somehow content at the same time. “I don’t think it makes you a dick.”

  “Good,” he whispers, brushing his soft lips against my forehead. “I’d hate for you to hate me already.”

  “I don’t think I could hate you, Nevin.”

  “Oh, I’m sure I could make you hate me if I really tried.”

  I smack his chest. “Don’t you dare. I’ve had enough assholes in my life. I don’t need another one.”

  Nevin laughs. “Don’t get me wrong. I am an asshole, but I’ll do my best not to be an asshole to you.”

  “Careful. I don’t want to throw hands, but you’ve already seen me in action. I’m not scared.”

  Nevin laughs louder this time. “I might like to see that, li’l moon.”

  “Don’t tempt me already,” I mutter, snuggling into his side a little harder.

  He holds me tighter, kissing the top of my head. “Should we get up and check out the damage?”

  “No,” I mumble against his skin. “I’m not ready to face the world.”

  “I don’t have to be at work. Everything’s closed. I can stay like this all day.”

  “The world can wait.”

  I close my eyes, following the dips and curves of his chest and abdomen with my fingertips until his breathing deepens, and I drift off again right behind him.

  18

  LUNA

  The bedroom door creaks, and then there’s a horrendous shriek. My eyes snap open, and I look down the bed, finding Rosie covering her face with her hands and staggering backward.

  “What the fuck, Ro?” I ask, untangling myself from Nevin’s body.

  “Me?” she asks behind her palms as she turns around to face the wall. “What the fuck to you, Lu.”

  “This is my place,” I remind her, pulling myself upward in the bed as Nevin yanks the comforter over his body to cover all his best bits. “What made you think you could just come in here without knocking or calling?”

  “I lived here too, Lu.”

  “Lived,” I snap as I grab my shirt off the chair next to my bed. “You can’t walk into my bedroom anytime you want. We could’ve been in the middle of something.”

  She still has her face covered and has done nothing to move. “Looked like you were in the middle of something to me.”

  “In the middle of a nice fucking dream,” Nevin mumbles as he lifts himself up and settles against the headboard.

  “I called. We texted. No one heard from you, and we were worried. When I got here, I knocked. I banged. And nothing. I was fucking worried. I thought maybe you had a massive panic attack or something worse.”

  I climb to my feet and slide on the same pair of shorts from last night. “What could possibly be worse?”

  “I don’t know. Maybe you died from fear.”

  I roll my eyes at her dramatics. “Well, I’m alive and kicking, sis.”

  “And naked,” she adds in a snarky tone.

  “Not anymore, thanks to you.”

  “I am,” Nevin says, rubbing his hands across his face as we both try to wake up.

  “He’s covered,” I tell my sister, crossing my arms over my chest, so fucking pissed I’m seeing red. “You can turn around now.”

  Rosie turns, lifting her chin, looking like a prude. “I can’t believe you two slept together.”

  And just like clockwork, Dylan fills the doorway. “Fuck,” he hisses, zeroing in on his brother.

  I narrow my eyes at my brother-in-law and my sister. “You two had no problem when I slept with Ian, but now that it’s Nevin, you suddenly have an issue?”

  Their double standards are utter bullshit. I’ve never listened to anyone on how to live my life, and I’m not about to start now. Whether they approve of our friendship or the fact that we fucked each other, it is none of their fucking business.

  “Ian was totally different,” Ro says, making absolutely no sense.

  Ian is the most emotionally unavailable person I know. He is worse than me, and that is saying something because I've run from anything resembling a relationship my entire life. Ian did so because of his cancer. He lived every day like it might be his last, and he only wanted happiness and fun, neither of which involved intimacy in his mind.

  I place my hands on my hips, glaring at my sister and her absurdity. “That’s the dumbest thing I’ve ever heard.”

  “Nevin, get your ass dressed. We need to talk,” Dylan says, rubbing the back of his neck like the prick is about to stroke out.

  “Got nothing to say,” Nevin replies without moving. “Last time I checked, we’re two consenting adults.”

  “Asshole.” Dylan shakes his head, calmer than he was when he first walked in. “It’s not like that. Please.”

  Nevin grunts and starts to get up, but the comforter falls, exposing his extra-beautiful cock.

  Rosie squeaks, immediately turning around. “Oh my God,” she wheezes. “I can’t believe you’d do that.”

  “Sweet Jesus. It’s just a penis,” I tell her, groaning. “You see one every day.”

  “But it’s his penis,” she tells me, throwing a hand toward Nevin while closing her eyes.

  Nevin pulls on his pair of jeans and stops next to me to kiss my cheek. “You two behave while we’re gone.”

  I smile. “You too. Don’t break any of my shit. Take your fists outside.”

  “No fists, li’l moon,” he tells me with a wink.

  “Li’l moon,” my sister repeats and makes a gagging noise. “Gross.”

  I turn my glare back toward her. She’s suddenly turned into my mother with her judgmental attitude, and I’m not having any of it. She needs to start acting like my sister and not my parents.

  “Don’t break any shit in here either,” Nevin says, teasing me.

  I tip my head toward the door and shoo him away. Nevin and Dylan stare at each other for a full thirty seconds in the doorway to my bedroom before they leave us alone.

  “Stop being an asshole, Ro. You’re not this person. You’re usually the only one who never judges me, and I need that person now and not whoever walked through the door to my bedroom a few minutes ago.”

  She turns back around, arms crossed, head cocked. “I was so worried about you, thinking the worst possible things, and you’re over here getting your brains banged out.”

  “Actually, I was banging his brains out,” I say, trying to be funny, but she doesn’t even crack the faintest smile.

  She takes a deep breath before she speaks. “I’m being serious.”

  “Me too. There was nothing funny about what we did.”

  Nothing at all.

  It was amazing.

  Maybe everything was heightened because of the fear and panic coursing through my entire system as the storm raged outside, but it was unlike anything I’ve ever experienced before.

  She takes a step toward me but stops a few feet away. “I just don’t want you to get hurt.”

  “I’m not hurt. I’m the furthest thing from hurt. Why in the ever-loving hell would I get hurt?”

  “I don’t want you to regret this,” she says, walking past me and sitting on the end of my bed. She fidgets with the chipped nail polish on her thumb. “This could easily end in disaster.”

  “You’re not worried about him, and it could just as easily end in something amazing and special.”

  She peers up with no judgment on her face. “Maybe I’m the one who has a problem seeing you with someone else. I was used to Ian. I had dreams for you two. I made the plans. Saw what I thought your future would be, and nowhere in it was Nevin.”

  I sit down next to her, our shoulders touching. “Ian and I could never work. We were friends, Ro.”

  She turns her head toward me. “Friendship can lead to something more.”

  “Maybe sometimes, but not with us. Ian’s a great friend, but he would be a shit boyfriend.” I stare straight ahead at the open door. “I can only live my life the way that I’ll be happy. I’m sorry you had dreams of us being more, but it’s never going to happen, Ro.”

  “I know,” she whispers. She reaches over, taking my hand in hers. “I don’t think I’ve ever worried about you this much.”

  I squeeze her fingers, loving my sister even if she’s a pain in the ass sometimes. “Stop worrying about me. If there were any other man in my bed, would you be scared or drag your ass over here, barging into my room?”

  She shakes her head.

  “You didn’t think I’d make it through the storm without you, but I did, and that’s only because Nevin was here.”

  “It’s because you were doing the horizontal mambo.”

  “What are you? Ninety?”

  She laughs.

  “I hope Dylan isn’t being a dick to Nevin,” I say.

  “I’ll handle Dylan. Why don’t you get dressed, and we’ll head to Grandma’s place? They made food for everyone.”

  As much as I want to say no, I am freaking starving, and besides a couple stray pizza rolls and crackers, there isn’t much in my cupboards or fridge. “Can Nevin come?”

  “Of course.”

  I throw my arms around her, hugging her tightly. “You’re my favorite sister. Do you know that?”

  “I better be since you’re my twin,” she grumbles as she hugs me back. “God, you’re such a pain in the ass sometimes.”

  “Takes one to know one,” I tease her, but my sister is really too sweet. That’s why I became more of a problem child. Someone had to stick up for her and make sure she didn’t get eaten alive by the kids in school. “And Ro, don’t ever barge into my bedroom again, ’kay?”

  She pulls away, throwing up her hands. “Never again. I learned that one the hard way. Not something I plan to repeat.”

  “It wasn’t hard.”

  She stares at me with her lips in a flat line. “You’re such a jerk.”

  I elbow her in the side, trying to get her to laugh. “Just admit his dick is pretty.”

  “Penises aren’t pretty, Lu.”

  “They’re beautiful, Ro.”

  “I didn’t look.” She stands, ready to run out of my bedroom like her ass is on fire.

  “Liar,” I tease, following her out of my bedroom to find the guys and hopefully not to play referee.

  I fully expect to see Nevin and Dylan rolling around the living room, fighting like two dumb teenagers. Instead, they’re sitting at the kitchen table, looking at their phones and drinking coffee like two old men.

  “Are you two good?” Ro asks.

  “Perfect,” Dylan says.

  I look at Nevin, studying his face. “Are you really good?”

  He nods. “We said our piece.”

  Whatever they said to each other, it wasn’t nearly as long or complicated as what Rosie and I said in my bedroom. But as with most men, that’s not entirely surprising.

  “My grandparents are having everyone over,” I tell Nevin. “You want to come?”

  Nevin’s gaze moves from me to my sister and then to his brother. “Should I?”

  “Come,” my sister says. “They’re expecting you.”

  “Oh boy,” Nevin mumbles. “Does everyone know I spent the night?”

  “I don’t know if they know, but I can guarantee the news will spread like wildfire before we get there,” I tell him as I reach for a coffee mug.