Expiation the whisper of.., p.37
Expiation: The Whisper of Death (Touched #4),
p.37
“Evan, what are you doing?!” Simon shouted. He’d never seen me really attack Gemma, but maybe there wasn’t any other option.
We were on a perfect battlefield. I didn’t want to seriously injure her but I had to at least try to shake her up. The more I attacked, the more amused she seemed. She began to use magic. Every tool in the room became a weapon. Around us rose a cloud of dust, trapping us inside a little hurricane. Gemma hurled me to the far end of the room, but I sprang back to attack her. A wall of nails flew toward me. The metal melted before it could hit me, so the coast was clear to rush her and knock her to the ground once more.
“I knew I had chosen my Champion wisely,” she told me in my mind, satisfied. She’d used my power.
“That isn’t surprising—you’ve always chosen me. It’s with the family that you made the wrong choice.” The remark enraged her, but she immediately looked away, distracted by something.
“Evan!” Simon cried. Peter’s soul had left his body. He was looking at his hands, confused by the new sensations running through him. Slowly he raised his head and his eyes pierced us, as gray as molten silver.
“What’s happening to me?” Peter fell to his knees and howled in pain as black ink seared his arm like a brand. Simon and I stared at each other, astonished. He was a Subterranean.
Gemma freed herself from my grip and reappeared beside Peter. “I’ll be back for you,” she whispered in his ear, her eyes locked on mine. Then she disappeared, a victorious smile on her lips.
HEART OF ICE
“All this is insane! Tell me I’m dreaming,” Peter burst out, in shock. “What the hell is this thing on my arm? Am I a ghost? And why does Gemma look like she came straight out of an episode of Xena: Warrior Princess?”
“Calm down. We’ll explain everything,” Simon replied.
“Wait a minute. If I’m dead, how is it you two can see me?” Peter took another look at his old body that lay on the floor in a pool of blood.
“Look.” Simon showed him the mark on his own arm. “We’ve got one too. You’ve been chosen. You aren’t a mortal Soul. You’re one of us, a Subterranean.”
“So you guys are dead too,” he said. “I always knew there was something strange about you.”
“That’s not the point.”
“Is the blond a ‘Subterranean’ too, whatever that is?” he asked cockily.
“She’s a Witch.”
“Oh, well, that explains everything.”
“Gemma wasn’t here for his mortal soul—she wanted to claim him as a slave,” I reasoned aloud.
“Souls? Slaves? What the hell is a Subterranean? Either this is a nightmare or I’ve ended up in one of my comic books.”
“Get him out of here before I kill him a second time,” I said.
“Hey, you can’t talk to me like that.”
“You’ll understand everything once you’ve eaten,” Simon explained. “Let’s go. I’ll show you the way.”
“Hold on! What’s going to happen to me and my life?”
I crossed the room with long strides and shoved my face into his. “That’s your life, right there,” I growled, pointing at his corpse. “Forget about it, because it’s already gone.”
Showing unexpected courage, he didn’t back down. In fact, he glared at me bitterly. “My mother can’t bury another body. I’m all she’s got left.”
“What does that mean?”
“I don’t want to die.”
“It’s too late. In case you haven’t noticed, you’re already dead.”
“Okay, I get it—I’m dead, but why does anyone have to know that? Nobody knows you guys are. If I’m not a common Soul, if I am what you say I am, why should I disappear?”
“You’re a Soldier now. You’ll be given orders and they’ll be the only thing that matters to you.”
“I’m a what?” he asked in shock. Not even the sight of his bloody body had upset him so much. “I want to be normal. I didn’t ask for this.”
“None of us did. And you’re not normal. You were chosen to serve Fate. Orders come first,” Simon insisted.
I sighed in exasperation. “We’re just wasting time.”
“Peter, trust us. When you eat of the Tree you’ll understand everything. You’ll know what your place is and you’ll be a lot stronger than you’ve ever been.”
“What would happen if I didn’t eat?”
“You’d get weaker and weaker until you disappeared. Evil would seize its chance to claim you and you wouldn’t be able to fight it.”
Peter was stressed out, but not as much as I was. I’d had enough of the guy. I didn’t have Simon’s patience, much less in this situation. “Do you have any idea how lucky you are? By this time you would have already been in Hell if we hadn’t been here to save you. Like it or not, death exists, and we’re its Soldiers.”
Peter reflected a moment and nodded. “Okay, but we’ll do things my way. I’m not going to leave my mom all on her own.” His words impacted me, clearing a path back to the memory of my own mother. “I can be both things. You even go to school. I just need to learn your rules.”
“All right. Do what you want.”
Just then, the door opened and a woman entered the room. “Mom,” he murmured, aghast. She couldn’t see us but she immediately spotted Peter’s bloody corpse. Her scream echoed through the room and she fainted. Simon rushed to her, catching her before she fell.
“It looks like I don’t have a choice any more,” Peter said, tears in his eyes. He leaned over his mother and stroked her cheek, looking at her as though for the last time.
“Yes you do,” I told him. “Simon can erase this memory from her mind.”
“Can you really do that?” Peter asked, his voice full of hope.
Simon nodded. His power hadn’t been able to bring Gemma back, but it could save the connection between Peter and his mother.
Peter turned to look at me, gratitude filling his face. “I guess I owe you my thanks.”
“It’s not the first favor I’ve done for you today,” I retorted. It was true. If Simon hadn’t been around, I’m pretty sure I would have killed him when I saw him with Gemma.
Simon leaned over Peter’s mother and rested his fingers on her temples. The woman’s face filled with thin back veins that quivered beneath her skin as he extracted her memory.
“What . . . what’s he doing to her?” Peter asked in alarm.
“Don’t worry, she’ll recover. When she wakes up she won’t remember any of this.”
Peter nodded gratefully. “We need to get rid of my body. Nobody can find out I’m dead.”
“We could bury it somewhere in the woods, make it unrecognizable,” I reassured him.
“I’ve got a better idea.” Peter shoved open a heavy iron door. “We’ll burn it in the incinerator.”
I went back to the house alone. I’d left Simon with the task of showing Peter the way between the two worlds. He wouldn’t be able to accompany him all the way to the Tree of Knowledge so he could eat of its fruit, but he would explain how it was done and Peter’s instinct would take care of the rest. Simon would wait for him to return and then bring him here to us, at least for the time being. More than anyone else, I understood his need not to abandon his mother, especially after I’d personally taken his father from him. But it wouldn’t be easy for Peter to pretend to still be human and take on his new duties as a Soldier at the same time. No matter how hard he tried to cling to his old life, it no longer belonged to him, and sooner or later he would realize it.
The house was unusually quiet. Liam must have been sleeping. I checked his playpen in the living room but he wasn’t there. Disappearing and materializing in the boy’s room, I found it empty as well. “Ginevra, where are you?” I called in my mind. The only reply was silence. Normally she would have materialized beside me instantly. It was strange to think she’d gone out and taken the baby with her. I concentrated on Liam’s soul to reach him, wherever he was. I couldn’t find him. The world came crashing down around me and the room began to spin. No. It couldn’t actually have happened.
“Evan . . .” My ears detected a faint murmur. It was Ginevra, in the pool area downstairs. I materialized beside her in the blink of an eye. She was on the floor, wounded and semiconscious. All around us was an imaginary forest full of life, but in my heart there was only silence.
“Ginevra! Ginevra, wake up! What happened?” I tried to bring her to, but my power didn’t work on her.
“Liam . . .” she murmured in anguish.
I jerked away from her, my eyes full of tears. “No . . .” I whispered, “It can’t be true. Tell me it’s not true. I beg you . . .”
I turned around and saw him. Everything inside me turned to ice. “NO!” I screamed. A flock of birds took wing, frightened.
Liam’s little body was floating face down in the simulated lake, his arms limp at his sides, swaying in the current that tried to push him to shore. I leapt into the water and carried him out, resting him on the rock and turning him over to look him in the face. He was so tiny, so defenseless! His heart had stopped beating. “Liam!” I cried, attempting to use my healing powers on him. It didn’t work. His soul was gone; someone had already helped him cross over. How could it have happened? “No!” I screamed in desperation. I clasped him to my chest, weeping in pain. “Liam, no . . .” I repeated, holding him tight. I kissed him on the forehead and pushed the hair from his face. It was thick, like his mother’s.
I had lost them both. I couldn’t believe he was gone, that I would never watch him grow up . . . that I hadn’t been there to protect him.
The hiss of an arrow touched my ear. I spun around and caught it, my eyes burning into those of the Hunter. Absolon. He’d broken free. I clenched my fist so hard it crushed his arrow. The shaft was metal, but within a split second I’d pulverized it in my fury. “You have no idea what you’ve got coming to you,” I threatened.
He glanced at the baby as I rested his body gently on the ground, never taking my eyes off Absolon. Standing up to face him, I balled my hands into fists. A strong wind blew through the trees, making the forest shudder. Wild rage blinded me and pain crushed my chest with its bands of steel.
In a flash, Absolon nocked another arrow and pointed his bow straight at me. I disappeared only to reappear right in front of him, my chest touching his arrowhead. “You’re going to sorely miss the Hell you came from,” I promised.
He lowered his weapon and attacked me, but I was faster. No man, Subterranean, or celestial creature could have escaped my wrath. Absolon tried to defend himself but I struck him mercilessly again and again, slamming him against the rock wall, shattering stones and uprooting the trees. I wanted to tear him limb from limb before sending him back to Hell. How dare he take my child from me?
Absolon tried to escape by leaping to the top of the waterfall, but I beat him to it. As soon as he landed, I hurled him to the cold stone at the edge of the cliff and wrapped one hand around his throat. With the other I took one of his arrows and pointed it at his jugular as he tried to distance himself from me by craning his neck into the empty space below him. I knew the poison wouldn’t kill him, and in any case I didn’t want him dead. Not yet. First he would have to experience for himself the suffering he’d inflicted on me, that he’d inflicted on my little Liam. I wanted him to taste at least some of the Hell that had emerged inside me.
Tears returned to fill my eyes. “How could you take it out on him?” I snarled, desperate. “How dare you take him from me?!” I screamed. Blood trickled from the spot where I was pressing the arrowhead.
“’Tis only ye I’m after,” he replied, undaunted.
“Then you shouldn’t have taken it out on him, because all you’ve gained is your own death,” I shouted in fury, my demoniacal eyes brimming with pain, rage, and loathing for the bastard who had stolen everything from me—first Gemma and now Liam. A shriek rose from my chest and echoed through the forest as I slit his throat with his own arrow.
He gurgled, but a burst of lightning streaked the sky above us, which suddenly darkened. “Stop!” a voice shouted.
I was so lost in my fury I didn’t recognize it. I had to turn toward her to realize it was Ginevra. “He has to die,” I hissed, “but first he has to endure Gemma’s suffering . . . and Liam’s. And mine.”
“He wasn’t the one who killed Liam,” she revealed gravely.
I released my grip on the Hunter and dried my tears. He gurgled, pulling the arrow from his neck. I stood up and leaned over the waterfall. Ginevra had my full attention. “Who was it, then?” I snarled, seething. Whoever it was, I would find them and tear them to shreds.
“It was one of the Màsala.”
A PAINFUL GOODBYE
I sank to my knees and embraced Liam for the last time, the excruciating fact of his absence bringing fresh tears to my eyes. “Why did they do this to me?” I sobbed, kissing his tiny cheeks. I had failed. I should have brought Gemma back so we could be a family but I had failed miserably, and now she would never see our child again. I couldn’t bear it, it was too painful. Too devastating. “Liam . . .” I murmured. “He had nothing to do with this, any of this.” My tears dampened his face.
Ginevra rested her hand on my shoulder. “He’s in Heaven now. He’ll be fine. At least he won’t grow up in the middle of this war.”
“I’ll never see him again. I’ve lost him forever,” I said, my voice dull.
“I’m sorry,” Ginevra said. “I tried to stop him but I couldn’t.” She stroked Liam’s forehead and her armor crumbled. She burst into tears. “I fought back, used all my magic, but it was useless. He took him away. Liam called out for you before vanishing. Then I passed out.”
I squeezed my eyes shut, overcome by pain. “It’s not your fault,” I reassured her. “Thank you for protecting him and loving him,” I murmured. Together we shed bitter tears, little Liam’s body lying motionless on our laps.
“No!” Simon shouted when he appeared beside us. Ginevra and I looked at him. Peter was at his side but Ginevra didn’t even notice. Nothing mattered more than our loss.
“It was the Màsala. They took him,” Ginevra told him. But it wasn’t the time for explanations. Simon knelt over the child and kissed his forehead, hugging Ginevra. He ran his hand over her cheek and healed her wound.
“I’m sorry I wasn’t here for him,” Peter said, but Ginevra shook her head to silence him.
I stood up and gathered pieces of wood. Ginevra watched me bind them together as she cradled Liam. Absolon was tied to a tree, unconscious. Ginevra had paralyzed him again with her magic. I built a little boat, making sure the structure was sturdy. Liam loved boats. Simon had carved him a wooden toy boat, and Liam loved to watch it float in the pond at the back of the gardens. I gently rested him inside it and a tear slid down my cheek as I prepared to say goodbye.
“Wait.” Ginevra touched the wood and a bed of flowers appeared around his little body. She leaned down and something sprang from the ground. A white orchid. She knew how much they meant to me. It was my mother’s favorite flower, and she’d always kept one on her piano. I would sit beside it and stare at it as she composed new melodies just for me. Ginevra plucked the orchid and offered it to me. I kissed the flower and rested it on Liam’s body. My mother would protect him. A new shudder of grief left me sobbing as a white flame emanated from my palm.
Seeing that I couldn’t bring myself to move, Simon set the boat adrift. When it had moved onto the lake, I cast my fireball onto it and the wood burst into flames, shrouding Liam in the heat of the fire. My fire . . . my last embrace.
Goodbye, my little warrior.
SEDUCTION AND TEMPTATION
I was sunk into the sofa, cradling Liam’s toy boat in my hands. I would cherish it forever as the most precious of treasures. “How are you?” Ginevra asked, sitting down beside me. We’d watched the funeral pyre all night long, until Liam’s little body had turned to ash. Only then did the others manage to pull me away. Ginevra had deactivated the forest simulation scenario and my dream of fatherhood had vanished along with that illusion. I’d spent hours in the darkness on that sofa, contemplating my suffering. Irony stayed beside me the whole time, as though he understood what had happened. We’d lost Gemma and now Liam as well.
“Tell me again,” I begged her, my voice empty. The fire of my pain was beginning to give way to ice. “Tell me everything you know.”
“His name is Adhémar. He’s one of the twelve.”
“Sounds like you know them well.”
“Only because I was Sophìa’s Specter and, like her, I had privileges. It’s never a pleasant experience meeting members of the Brotherhood. The mere presence of the Màsala leaves you petrified. Few have seen them, since they’re superior beings and never show themselves to anyone—they always wear a red hood to hide their appearance—but I have. It’s like they have no face. Their eyes look like glass. They’re blind, because they see through Souls. Their voice is as dark as the depths of the abyss, their power immense.”
I understood what Ginevra must have felt. I’d met with one of the Màsala when I wanted to back out of my orders to execute Gemma. I’d summoned them, imagining they would pay no attention, but one of them had actually shown himself to me. The entire forest had reacted to his presence and time had frozen. His eyes were hollow, empty. Meeting his gaze was like staring into a hole that looked out onto the universe. It made me dizzy. Back then I hadn’t known how important she was to them—important enough to show themselves to me to make sure I killed her. What they couldn’t have foreseen was that she would fall in love with me.
“We don’t know why they took Liam’s life. I doubt his time had come, but at this point even they are breaking the rules. Maybe they were afraid Gemma would take him with her and use him in the name of evil.”




