The castle, even the tiny bit I was allowed to explore was like nothing I’d ever seen before. The very walls were carved out of the same white stone that I’d seen back when we arrived.

  The windows looked like they were made of actual crystal and not glass itself. It sparkled in the sunlight, casting rainbows all across the walls and floors. Making it feel more magical. More fantastical.

  A great gold geometric pattern was painted along the top of every wall and around every door, every arch, it swirled in a delicate frame.

  My feet didn’t seem to mind as I walked further along, in fact though they felt stiff, it was as though they hadn’t been cut at all. As though I hadn’t run through brambles and god knows what else.

  As I turned a corner I paused staring out an open window. Around me were the twists, and turrets of the castle, and below, below looked like another castle, as though the one we were in was stacked above it.

  I guess that’s why they called this the ‘Upper Castle.’

  But further below, just within eyesight was what must be the city. Where the average citizens lived.

  Nela looked down to where my eyes were drawn.

  “The citadel has over a million occupants.” She stated.

  “All living down there?” I asked.

  She shook her head. “No. Not all. Many live in the Lower Castle. They’re more protected there.”

  “Protected against what?” I asked.

  She met my eyes but didn’t answer.

  Spectrals. I don’t know why but I knew that’s what she was thinking. What was on the tip of her tongue. Though I couldn’t comprehend what the things actually were, something inside me, something instinctive reacted.

  “Do you think I can help you?” I said.

  Her lip curled just a little. “Is that what’s going on in that head of yours? Is that what you’re mulling over?”

  I scowled. Like she even knew me. Hell we’d only just met.

  She let out a low laugh. “You’re easy enough to read. You let your emotions show too readily. Perhaps that is something you should work on because this place, these people, they’ll eat you alive if you don’t learn to hide it.”

  “That’s your advice?”

  She shrugged. “That’s just a bonus tip.”

  “A bonus tip?” I repeated. “You haven’t even given me the main point then.”

  The amusement left her face as she turned to look at me fully. “My advice is this; don’t fight Prince Fain. You won’t win.”

  I narrowed my eyes. Seriously? Did he tell her to say that?

  She walked away before I could reply, joining Indi who stood just beyond the other guards. They murmured between themselves as though spilling secrets no one else was allowed to hear.

  I turned my back on them. On the pair of them. Staring back out at the view. If I was going to escape from here, I’d have to get to the Lower Castle. I’d have to disguise myself too.

  Because every person we passed, every single one stared at me without shame, without even trying to hide it. It was obvious that I was different. Obvious that I stood out.

  If I made a run for it and got caught, not by the Prince but by someone else, some chancer, then I was certain they too would lock me away, imprison me, just as Ghosh had tried to.

  “We should head back.” Indi said breaking my thoughts.

  I nodded, playing the obedient captive.

  We’d barely been out of the room for half an hour but clearly yard time was over.

  Time to lock the prisoner away again once more.

  When we got back the stringlet was there waiting for me.

  I immediately examined it for differences. It was slightly smaller than a guitar but that might actually be an advantage considering how much I always had to stretch my short fingers across the frets. It’s end with the keys was also different, instead of a straight edge it curved off similar to a violin.

  I plucked each string listening for the notes. It was tuned at a higher octave too so I set about retuning it while Mira sat watching me.

  “Play us something.” She said.

  I looked up. “I don’t perform.” I replied, tuning the final string.

  “You’re not performing, you’re entertaining.”

  “That’s the same thing.” I said confused.

  “Well even if it is you’re amongst friends.” Mira laughed.

  I laughed too. Not because it was true but because it was absurd to think that these people could be my friends. That they would ever see me as anything more than just a thing to use.

  “Fine.” I murmured looking at Mira’s face. Clearly she’d understood where my amusement had come from and despite how I felt, I didn’t want to hurt her unnecessarily. “But I’m rusty and I need to adjust for the size difference so…”

  “Getting your excuses in early?” Nela asked with a smirk.

  “Something like that.” I said before positioning the stringlet across my thigh and trying to decide on an easy song to start with.

  Closing my eyes, I tried to pretend I didn’t have an audience and started plucking the strings of the intro, “I took my love, I took it down. I climbed a mountain and I turned around…”

  When I finished Mira burst into applause. “That was amazing. Did you write that yourself?”

  I laughed. “I wish. That was Fleetwood Mac. I can’t write songs, I just sing them.”

  “Who’s Fleetwood Mat?” Mira asked.

  “They’re a famous band where I come from.” I replied not seeing the point in correcting her pronunciation, it wasn’t like she was ever going to need to know the band’s real name.

  “Sing something else.”

  “She’s not a performing monkey.” Indi said.

  Mira flushed bright red.

  “It’s okay.” I said, feeling more sorry for her. “How about I teach you?”

  “Would you?” Mira gasped.

  I shrugged. “Why not? But I warn you I’m a mean teacher.”

  “I doubt that.” Nela said and we all laughed.

  “Seriously would you teach me?” Mira asked.

  “Here, we can start now.” I said offering the stringlet to her.

  “Hold it like this.” I said straightening it. “It’s going to hurt your fingers at first but they’ll get used to it.”

  “Teach me to play that song please.”

  I smiled. This was a good distraction. And a calming one.

  We spent the next few hours playing. By the time we were done Mira’s fingers were blistering and even mine felt sore. But was I complaining? No. No, I was relieved to have an outlet. To have some way of channelling my anger, and frustration, and all of it.

  Food was once again brought up to me.

  The rooms I’d been given had a separate dining room beyond the sitting room with the great fireplace.

  As we all sat around I watched my new jailers, watched Mira too. All three of them were tucking in, eating as if this were perfectly normal but it felt odd. It felt…

  “Does everyone eat in their own rooms?” I asked.

  Mira looked up, fork half to her mouth.

  Indi glanced at Nela.

  Nela sat back against her chair. “No. Not everyone.”

  “So where do they eat?” I asked.

  “In the Great Hall.” She stated.

  The vision I got from those words, it felt like somewhere there was a massive banquet going on. That deep in the bowels of this castle, all the fine lords and ladies and no doubt Prince Fain was tucking into a feast.

  “Why are we eating here then?” I replied.

  Her lips twitched again. “I’d have thought that was obvious.”

  I narrowed my eyes. “Because the Prince ordered it.” I stated through gritted teeth.

  Nela nodded.

  “He thought you’d be more comfortable away from prying eyes.” Indi said.

  “Is that so?” I snapped. More like he wanted to keep me hidden.

  “Would you rather eat in front of everyone?” Nela asked. “I can speak to the guards.”

  I let out a low breath. She’d called my bluff but she’d known that. Maybe it had been written across my face. Maybe she was right with her words earlier. I did need to learn to hide my emotions. To hide my thoughts better.

  “No.” I said quietly. “Here is fine.” I dropped my eyes. The word ‘coward’ echoing in my head.

  But that was me.

  Cowardly. Pathetic.

  Even in this new place, even with this supposed power I had, at my core, I was still a coward, too afraid to truly stand up for myself for fear of the consequences. The repercussions.

  I didn’t speak again. I didn’t really look at any of them.

  Perhaps I was taking my anger out on them. Perhaps it was unwarranted but they were all complicit in this. They were all aiding the Prince in keeping me locked up here.

  I shook my head. Making excuses. Retiring to bed.

  I didn’t want to look at them. At any of them. I felt guilty at treating them badly because ultimately, they were in the same position as me, stuck following the Prince’s orders.

  I was walking the corridor. It was late, class had finished hours ago but I hadn’t wanted to go back to my dorm. I knew who was there. Who was always there. So like usual I’d hid out in the main building of the school, waiting until the last possible moment before curfew came in, before I would sneak back to my room.

  As I turned the corner all I could hear were my own footsteps. Though I kept them as quiet as I could. I knew some of the teachers would be patrolling, ensuring everyone was back to their houses. If they found me, they’d march me back themselves. And they wouldn’t do it quietly either.

  Sometimes I wondered if some of the teachers were in cahoots with the students. If this was all some George Orwellian nightmare I was living in. Like some awful adaption of Animal Farm.

  As a bell chimed I paused. The five minute warning. Five minutes to be out, to be up the stairs and gone. I picked up my pace. This was the moment I always dreaded. The moment where everything was on a knife edge.

  I rushed down the stairs. One foot. Then the other. Silently racing to the final door. That was where the real risk was.

  If anyone was waiting for me, if I was going to meet anyone of them, it would be here.

  As I held my breath I pushed open the door.

  It was silent beyond.

  I let out an exhale.

  Ten steps. That was all I had now. Ten steps between me and my bedroom and a lock that would keep everyone out until morning. Or at least until the early hours when I’d need to sneak out in case they decided to give me a not so friendly wake up call.

  Nine steps.

  My heart started pounding. It was ridiculous.

  Eight steps. No one was here. That’s what I told myself.

  Seven steps.

  If anyone was lurking my heart would have given me away. My blood was pounding in my ears.

  Six steps.

  Five steps.

  I could see my door now.

  Four steps.

  My fingers fumbled for the key in my pocket. I didn’t want to hesitate. I didn’t want to be caught now.

  Three steps.

  I was so close. So god damn close.

  Two steps.

  I almost let out a whimper, biting my tongue so hard to stifle the sound.

  One step.

  I shoved the key in the lock. Turned it. Opened the door as relief spread through me.

  I’d done it. I’d made it. Another day of terror averted.

  But as I stepped over the threshold a shadow behind me moved.

  “And where have you been?”

  I turned, my eyes widening as I saw them. As I saw them all.

  I shook my head, pushing the door, shoving it as hard as I could but it wasn’t enough. I wasn’t enough.

  They laughed shoving it back. I fell. Landing hard onto the floor.

  “Aww look at her face.” Matt said as he leant down, flicking a strand of hair off my shoulder. How he’d got inside the girl’s dormitory I didn’t know, but he was fucking Bianca so I guess he had ways.

  Bianca laughed. Katie cackled.

  Sian shut the door. Shutting us all in.

  “We’ve been waiting for you.” Tilly said grabbing my hair, yanking me around by it.

  I cried out. I lashed out. Five against one was shit odds by anyone’s standing.

  As the punches started, as the kicks started too, I stopped fighting. I curled up, protecting my head, protecting my ribs.

  They didn’t care if they left bruises. They didn’t care if they broke bones. The school wouldn’t question it. Not really.

  Besides I wasn’t going to admit who’d done it. The whole school hated me. Even the teachers hated me. No one gave a damn who’d beaten me up because in truth, most of them had hit me at some point or another.

  I screamed as a boot collided with my ribs. As they cracked on impact.

  Someone grabbed my hair again, wrenching me up. As I looked up in horror Matt stood in front. Only it wasn’t Matt anymore.

  He was taller. His body far more muscular. But that look, he had the same awful look in his eyes as he stepped up to me.

  I screamed. I screamed so loudly. Fighting. Ignoring the searing pain in my side but they others held me too tightly to do anything.

  He stepped closer. Knife in his hand.

  “All Fae are a freak of nature.” Fain spat before he lunged at me.

  “Wake up. Wake up.” Mira said shaking me.

  I lashed out, mercifully missing her as I woke up fully. As I realised it was just a dream. Just another awful nightmare.

  My body was covered in sweat my clothes stuck to my skin and my hair felt like it was plastered across my forehead.

  I threw the covers off. Got out of the bed. But almost crashed into the wall from the dizziness that hit me.

  I’m going to puke.

  I closed my eyes, trying to mentally calm myself but all I saw was Matt superimposed with Fain and it made it worse. So much worse.

  “It’s just a dream. Just a bad dream.” Mira said soothingly as she went to hug me but I flinched away.

  I didn’t want to be touched right now.

  I didn’t want to be anywhere near another person.

  “Come on sit down.” Mira said guiding me to the chair nearest the fire.

  Indi and Nela watched on but kept quiet.

  Mira poured a drink and put a blanket around my now shivering shoulders.

  I stared into the glass, waiting, knowing that the horrible memories would fade but my heart was still pounding as though I was there, as though they were here, still attacking me.

  Every time I thought I was over it, every time I thought I might be getting free, it all came flooding back. I could hear his voice whispering poison into my ear. I could feel the wetness of his spit on me all over again.

  And with every repeat it was worse.

  “Wanna talk about it?” Indi asked as she got up and moved to sit beside the fireplace opposite me.

  “No.” I replied not looking at her. Having them watch, having them witness this made my shame so much worse.

  “A problem shared is a problem halved.” Mira said cheerfully and I glared at her.

  “I used to have nightmares.” Indi said. “I was at Eastden.”

  Mira gasped at the name.

  “It was an awful battle.” Mira said to me. “So many people died…” She stopped talking as she looked at Indi’s blank face.

  “It was awful.” Indi said. “It’s the worst battle I’ve ever been in. Worst day of my life. Almost everyone in my battalion died. We were on the Northern Gate, we saw the Magars before they even started the attack but we were outnumbered from the start.”

  “What happened?” I asked.

  “They slaughtered us. Twenty thousand people dead. The whole city was sacked.” Indi shrugged her voice devoid of any emotion.

  “How did you survive?” Mira asked.

  “I don’t know. I almost didn’t. We got cut off, there were five of us. I remember the spectrals attack and then there’s just darkness. I don’t remember anything till I woke up weeks later. I just remember the fighting before.”

  “That’s awful.” Mira said before turning to me. “Was that what your dream was about? A battle you were in back in your world?”

  I looked between them then looked away.

  To explain it made me sound pathetic. Pathetic and worthless. I bit my tongue and said nothing. The initial panic had gone and now I was falling into the familiar exhaustion of emotions.

  I sat back in the chair, watching the flames flickering away.

  Picking up the stringlet I played almost subconsciously while hoping the day would come soon so I could distract myself. Hell, I’d even take a day full of Marke going on about me being the god damn High King’s possession if it took my mind off of this.

  Mira sighed and got up to stoke the fire. “I’m going to tell the guards to make sure we have a big breakfast.” She said but no one replied. No one reacted.

  Indi sat opposite me, watching the flames as though she too was lost in the horror of her memories.

  Where Nela was I didn’t know but in this moment I didn’t care. If they all disappeared, if they all got up and walked out I don’t think I’d have noticed.

  I was too lost in my own head.

  We sat waiting for Nela. We’d both felt the crystal warm as she’d sent the message through it. That she was coming. That she had an update for us.

  “Well?” Jelric asked as before she’d even shut the door.

  “The maid is a bit of a simpleton.” She said as she poured herself a drink.

  Jelric raised an eyebrow.

  “He meant about the Fae girl.” I replied.

  “Alice.” Jelric corrected me. “We need the girl to trust us and that started with using her name.”

  I walked over to pour myself a drink too. I was getting sick of his lectures, even if the logic behind them made some sense.

  “She has nightmares.” Nela stated.

  “What about?” Jelric asked.

  Nela shrugged. “She won’t say but she wakes up screaming and sweating. The maid, Mira, told us she’s done it every night here although she doesn’t always wake up and she doesn’t always remember it.”