“My granddaughter is too modest. Did you know she volunteers with cooking classes down at the local veterans’ home every month?”

  It wasn’t really a question, Marnie thought as she watched the interaction between the two women. They clearly had a tight-knit bond, one that was enviable, and she was suddenly filled with a yearning and longing for family. Her throat ached from the rawness of words unsaid. Her heart hurt from the way it pounded behind her ribs. She had her own family back in Bakersfield. She had her aunt and her cousins, particularly Shay. She even had her father. But in that moment, she wanted more. She wanted to be included in the affection she witnessed between the two women in front of her. She wanted the family her own mother had been denied.

  But now wasn’t the time. She had to find a way to confront Patience, and that way was not at a teenager’s birthday party. She excused herself, feeling the sting of tears burning her eyes, and headed for the house. She found the bathroom on the ground floor and spent a few minutes tidying herself up, dabbing at her red-rimmed eyes and swallowing the rawness in her throat. When she walked back down the hallway, she spotted Joss standing at the bottom of the stairs.

  “Everything okay?” he asked, his expression narrowed. “You took off pretty quickly from the barn.”

  “Nature called,” she said and sighed. “This house is amazing,” she said, shifting the subject.

  “Have you been upstairs?” he asked and when she shook her head, he held out his hand. “Come on, I’ll give you the ten-cent tour.”

  Marnie took his hand and his fingers entwined with hers. They were halfway up the stairs when he stopped and drew her attention to one of the photographs on the wall.

  “That’s my mother, Louise,” he said, gesturing to a pretty woman in her thirties who was wearing a short floral dress and flat shoes.

  A man had his arm loped affectionately across her shoulders. “Is that your dad?”

  “Yeah. Billie-Jack.”

  Marnie met his gaze. He looked a little lost—and she knew that feeling all too well. And suddenly, she wanted to talk—really talk. She wanted to share thoughts and feelings. But she couldn’t tell him anything about herself. Instead, she grasped on to another subject. “Would you tell me about the accident?”

  He regarded her curiously. “The accident?”

  “The one where your brother nearly died,” she clarified. “What happened?”

  He looked at the photo again, then back to her, and he let out a long sigh. “The old man had been drinking late the night before, and that morning he was more unbearable than usual. It was a Saturday and Mitch was already out, delivering a couple of head of cattle to one of the local ranchers. Billie-Jack started on at me about something and I remember telling him to take a hike. He had the strap he used to keep above the kitchen door in his hand within seconds and I knew I was in for a walloping.” He urged her up a couple more steps. “Jake intervened, as he always did, to take the heat off the rest of us and the two of them threw a few punches.”

  They were on the landing now, looking down at the wide stairway. “Then what happened?”

  “I took off for my room and locked the door. I heard Billie-Jack yelling to Grant and Hank to get into the truck. And Grant was just a kid, so he did what he was told. And Hank, he always tried to be the peacemaker, you know...kind of makes sense that he went into law enforcement as a career.”

  Despite there being a party outside, the house was eerily quiet. “Tell me the rest.”

  The pressure of his fingers increased a little. “Billie-Jack took off and Jake followed on his motorcycle. The truck crashed and thankfully Grant was thrown free. Hank was stuck inside and the old man didn’t try and get him out.”

  “That’s how your brother got the scar on his face?” she asked quietly.

  He nodded. “And he suffered burns to thirty percent of his body. It was a long and painful recovery.”

  “And your father?”

  “He took off a few weeks later,” he replied emotionlessly. “Did us all a favor.”

  Marnie noticed the way the pulse throbbed in his jaw. “I sense a ‘but’ in there somewhere.”

  He shrugged his beautiful shoulders. “Maybe if I hadn’t told the old man to take a hike, it wouldn’t have happened.”

  Marnie was silent. She saw the guilt in his expression and her heart lurched for him. “You don’t believe that, do you?”

  He shrugged again. “I don’t know. Maybe.”

  “Have you said anything to your brother?”

  His gaze sharpened for a second and he exhaled heavily. “I’ve never said that to anyone except my wife. She had the same look you do right now.”

  “She was a wise woman.”

  “That she was,” he said and slowly brought her knuckles to his mouth, kissing her softly. “Wanna see my old room?”

  Marnie smiled. “Sure.”

  He walked up the hallway and entered a room on the left. It was decked out with bunk beds, and styled in various shades of pink and purple, with a picture of a unicorn on the wall. There was even a fluffy cushion on the chair near the window.

  She raised a quizzical brow. “Really?”

  “The girls decorated it.” He grinned. “I did say it was my old room. They use this when they stay at the ranch. The master suite is down there,” he said and pointed to a door on the right. “Then there are two other guest rooms and the nursery.”

  “Are your brother and Tess planning on having more children?”

  He shrugged. “They had a hard time having a baby—Charlie is something of a miracle—so I’m not sure if they’ll try for another.”

  “Do you want more kids?”

  Whoa, girl...could you be any more obvious?

  But being so close to him, her ovaries were doing all kinds of things.

  “Maybe,” he said and then shrugged one shoulder. “I mean, I love the girls, I’m sure I’d feel the same about any other kids I have.”

  “Well, now that you’re the father of a teenager, you’ll have a ready-made babysitter,” she teased.

  He winced. “Don’t remind me. I feel old.”

  Marnie laughed softly. “Wait until she starts dating... That’s sure to age you.”

  “You know, you’re not the least bit funny,” he replied. “And Sissy isn’t allowed to date until she’s at least eighteen.”

  “Weren’t you married with a baby on the way at eighteen?” she reminded him and leaned back a little on the doorjamb.

  “Precisely.”

  Marnie looked up at him as he closed the gap between them. “You planning on kissing me?”

  “I think so,” he replied. “Is that okay?”

  “You know,” she said and rested her free hand against his chest. “At some point kissing isn’t going to be enough, right?”

  He nodded. “It’s already not enough. But I’m leaving that up to you.”

  Marnie’s heart hammered. “Giving me all the power?”

  “Absolutely,” he said and chuckled as his mouth came down on hers in a way that was sinfully erotic and mind-blowingly sensual.

  She wasn’t sure how long they stayed like that, in the doorway, just kissing, just mouths fused together in a way that could almost be G-rated, except for the thrum of desire she knew was coursing through them both.

  “Ah—guys,” an unexpected voice said and they instantly sprang apart. “Ever heard the expression, get a room?”

  They turned and spotted Ellie striding down the hall, grinning broadly as she passed them and headed for one of the guest rooms.

  “Busted,” Joss said and chuckled. “Sorry about that.”

  Marnie ran a hand over her hair. “Just as much my fault as yours,” she muttered.

  It took about ten seconds for them to head downstairs and return to the party. By late afternoon, most of the guests had left and only the family and a few friends remained. They’d moved the celebration to the house, and a buffet of snacks was laid out on a table in the living room. Despite the turmoil of meeting her grandmother, and of getting busted making out with Joss, Marnie was oddly relaxed. She enjoyed the comradery and solidarity of the Culhanes. They loved one another fiercely and clearly had one another’s back. Again, it made her long for her own kin.

  “That’s the same look you had on your face a couple of hours ago when you raced off from the barn,” Joss said as he came up behind her, resting a hand gently on her shoulder. “Everything okay?”

  “I’m fine,” she assured him. “I promise. Just feeling a little homesick, that’s all.”

  “Natural,” he said. “Anything I can do to help you with that?”

  Hold me, she longed to say, desperately wanting to rest back against him and feel his strong arms around her. “Be my friend,” she said quietly.

  His head came a little closer. “That’s all?”

  “No,” she replied. “But I’m trying to keep a level head and not fall for you.”

  “Would that be so bad?”

  “That’s a loaded question,” she flipped back. “I could ask you the same thing.”

  “So, ask me,” he dared.

  Marnie turned a little. “If I fall for you, will you break my heart?”

  “Not intentionally,” he replied. “I try to live my life honestly. Don’t you?”

  Guilt pressed down on her shoulders. Because she wasn’t honest—not by a long shot.

  And somehow, she sensed that Joss knew it.

  * * *

  Joss usually got roped into playing the piano when there was a family gathering at the Triple C. Christmas, Thanksgiving, birthdays—it was something of a tradition. But he’d never played in front of someone he was dating. Lara, of course, used to sing along, even though she could barely hold a tune. Playing in front of Marnie, though, filled him with an almost overwhelming performance anxiety. And he also got the sense that all his brothers knew it.

  Afterward, he steered clear of her for a while, trying to work out in his head what was going on. Lots of talk, for starters. And kissing—which was great—but also as frustrating as hell.

  “I feel inadequate,” she said when she finally sidled up beside him next to the piano, while a final round of coffee was being served by Tess and Mrs. B.

  “Why’s that?”

  “Are you kidding?” she replied. “The girls said you could play the piano—but I wasn’t expecting that. You’re amazing.”

  “Yeah, my one talent,” he said and then raised a brow. “Well, maybe not just that.”

  “So,” she said, looking down at the floor, “are we still on for next weekend?”

  “For sure. The girls will be in Rapid City. I’m all yours.”

  They both knew what it meant. There was no innuendo. No hinting. Just plain old fact. They were going to sleep together the following weekend and change the dynamic of their relationship. After avoiding the obvious, Joss accepted what was happening—they were dating.

  And of course, in true torturous style, the week dragged by slowly. By Thursday he was so wound up he could barely think straight. He saw her a couple of times for dinner with the girls. Even though he knew she had classes to plan and papers to grade, she was very generous with her time. She helped Sissy with a history assignment one afternoon, and then she spent time with Clare, teaching her more cupcake recipes. She had so easily merged into their lives, and Joss was amazed at how his daughters had grown to love her so quickly. He’d dropped Marnie’s car off in the afternoon and made plans to see her the following evening when he returned from Rapid City.

  “Dad,” Clare said on the drive to Rapid City. “Is Marnie your girlfriend now?”

  “Of course she is,” Sissy said and tutted. “Or she would be if he had any sense.”

  Joss scowled at his eldest daughter. “All right, lighten up, will you?”

  “Is she gonna move in with us?” Clare asked, relentless.

  “No,” he said quickly. “Of course not.”

  “Nana and Pop always ask if you’ve got a girlfriend,” Clare said and frowned. “What do we tell them now?”

  “Nothing,” he replied. “Marnie and I are just friends for now. If that changes, I’ll tell your grandparents myself.”

  “They miss Mommy,” Clare said softly.

  “So do I,” he said. “We all miss her.”

  “I’d miss Marnie, too, if she left,” Clare said.

  She is leaving...in five months and one week.

  “Try not to screw this up, Dad,” Sissy said when they got out of the car outside their grandparents’ house. “We like Marnie...and as much as we love you, Dad, it would be nice to have a woman in the house to talk to for a change.”

  He knew they longed for female company...knew they wanted a mother to call their own. And with everything that he was, Joss wished he could give them what they wanted.

  “I’ll try not to do anything stupid,” he assured them.

  He said goodbye to his daughters and drove back to Cedar River, stopping by Jo-Jo’s on the way home to pick up a pizza, and was at Marnie’s by seven. She greeted him at the door with a kiss and a smile, looking lovely in a long, pale blue dress that had a row of tiny buttons down the front. He’d seen her in the dress before, and loved how it flared over her hips, accentuating her womanly shape. He wondered, for a fleeting moment, how he’d ever considered her anything other than beautiful. Her hair bounced around her shoulders as she moved. Her skin was smooth and supple, her blue eyes sparkling bright and clear, and a heady surge of attraction rumbled through his blood. Ten minutes later they were in the kitchen sharing pizza and a bottle of wine.

  “Clare asked me if you were my girlfriend,” he said.

  She held the pizza slice midair. “And what did you say?”

  “I didn’t get much of chance to say anything. Sissy told me not to screw it up.”

  Marnie’s mouth curved into a smile. “Don’t you just love having daughters.”

  “Usually,” he replied. “Not so much when they’re smarter than me.”

  “What do you mean?” she asked, clearly knowing exactly what he meant.

  Joss reached across and grasped her hand. “They like you a lot. They want you in their life.”

  “I like them, too,” she admitted and twirled her fingers into his palm. “You, on the other hand...”

  “You mean, when liking is more than liking? Yeah,” he said and let out a breath. “That’s when it’s tough.”

  Her touch was like an electric current and at the same time like tonic, as though it could cure all his ails. Balm for the soul. He remembered Mitch saying that once to him, about Tess. He’d joked about it at the time, calling his brother sentimental... Now he began to understand. There was something curative about Marnie...a soft, gentle spirit that was undeniably magnetic. He’d felt it from the first, those few short weeks ago. At the time he’d resisted and almost resented the sensation...now, he longed for it like a thirsty man craved water.

  “It’s mutual, you know,” she admitted.

  Joss nodded. “I know.”

  “I’m not sure how it all happened so fast.”

  “Does time matter?”

  She shrugged. “Usually—but there’s nothing usual about how I’m feeling. So, are you going to spend the night?” she asked quietly, almost hesitantly.

  Joss’s gut plummeted. God, he wanted to, so much. “Am I invited?”

  “Yes.”

  He knew she was giving him an option—knew she understood how much, for him, there was at stake. It was one more reason to want her. When someone else might have shrugged off his concerns, Marnie was too intuitive not to notice he was drowning under the weight of needing to do the right thing for his family, his kids and for them both.

  “Do you need promises?” he asked quietly. “Assurances?”

  “Usually, yes,” she replied. “But not right now. I just want to be with you.”

  Her bedroom was the furthest one down the hall. Not the largest, but the one with the view of the yard and the flowering hedge. She’d bought new linens, and the beige-and-white palette seemed to add space to the room. She held his hand and lingered in the doorway for a moment.

  “I haven’t done this in a while,” she admitted.

  “Me, either.”

  “I haven’t done this all that much, I guess I mean.”

  Joss pulled her close, feeling her curves against him. “I wish I could say the same thing. But the truth is, I’ve only had real feelings for one woman in my life, until now. And I’m not quite sure what to do with those feelings.”

  “Do this,” she said huskily, and pressed closer and reached around to run her hands through his hair. “I’ve been wanting to do that since the first time I met you,” she admitted.

  Joss kissed her slowly, lingering because he knew that was what she liked. Her hands were on his chest, her breasts pressed against him and it sent his libido skyrocketing. There was a lamp on the bedside table and the light was enough to create shadows on the wall. She pulled back and put some distance between them and then slowly began undoing the row of buttons.

  “I’m glad you’re doing that,” he admitted and chuckled. “I was thinking about how I’d get them undone without snapping the buttons.”

  “You’ve been thinking about my buttons?”

  “Every time I see you in that dress,” he admitted and smiled, watching as the fabric fell apart and the dress slipped off her shoulders. She wore black lace underwear—the sexy, R-rated kind that were the stuff of fantasies, and he ached to touch her through the lace fabric. “You are so beautiful.”

  She looked away for a moment, like his words embarrassed her, and then she met his gaze straight on. “I’ve never worn this before.”