Candace had given birth to a beautiful girl, his child.

  He tried to keep his anxiety away from his inquisitive daughter as much as he could. He was glad that Kenny was so excited about the sleepover that she didn’t give him any trouble at all. In fact, she was the epitome of obedience. While they had deep-dish pizza, after he picked her from school this afternoon, he told her that she had to do all her homework before six; the time they agreed to go to the Parkers. She had nodded and ran off into her room without even the tiniest frown.

  “Daddy, it’s time!”

  Speak of the devil.

  He shut down his laptop and turned to the door, expecting to see his daughter bounce into the room any second now. He could hear her patter of rapid footsteps heading his way already. Since he always left the office early on Fridays, to be with his daughter, he always brought home whatever was left of his work, but to be honest, this time, he hadn’t seen a word on the screen.

  All he could think about was Candace and her daughter, Lyric. They were all he had thought about at the office too and only a deep familiarity with his work and processes kept him from getting distracted the entire time.

  “Daddy, it’s time!” Kenny said again as she entered the room on a giddy run.

  She looked so excited he didn’t try to contain the smile that crept into his face. He couldn’t blame her; in fact, he was just as excited because he was about to meet Candace again. If Kenny hadn’t said Lyric had told her that her mother was making them cupcakes for the evening, he would have thought she’d chickened out. But then, he still had her house address anyway.

  And her phone number.

  He had needed to mentally restrain himself from calling her last night and this morning. He was excited all right – but his excitement was mixed with so much anxiety, so much hurt, so much anger and so many questions, he was confused.

  “Why are you still sitting there, daddy? We need to go. It is time.”

  “Yes, honey bear, I know it is.”

  Kenny was bouncing from foot to foot as she stared up at him.

  “You’re done with your homework?”

  She extended a book to him. He hadn’t even noticed she had come with her bag. Kenny had made them pack her tote bag since last night in readiness for this evening.

  “All done.” She grinned.

  He checked and saw that, indeed, it was all done and she got all her math sums correct. He was proud of her. Perhaps, it would be good to have the prospect of a sleepover hanging around the house all the time. As much as his daughter liked school, she hated to do her assignments except he sat them out with her. It was the only time she didn’t sing the ‘big girl’ song in his ears.

  “That’s my girl!” He beamed proudly as they exchanged a high five.

  “Can we go now?”

  “You still need to take a shower,” he said with a smile.

  “I already did, remember?” she said with a smug. “Smell my soap, daddy,” she said as she climbed unto his lap, looking like she couldn’t believe he’d forgotten already.

  He actually could smell the soft fragrance of her baby soap. His daughter really meant business.

  “All right then, somebody is excited to leave her daddy alone.”

  Kenny giggled. “It is only for the weekend, daddy.”

  He smiled as she rolled her eyes at him. “Daddy will be lonely without you,” he said, rubbing his nose against hers.

  She giggled. “You can come sleep over, too, if you like. Lyric already told me they have four bedrooms and she and her mommy only sleep in two.”

  Kenny said the words innocently, but she had no idea what they did to him. Suddenly, Aric found himself imagining spending the night under the same roof as Candace. But he wouldn’t be sleeping in a guest room. The thought got him wondering if there was a man in her life at the moment.

  Don’t go there, man.

  “No, honey bear, daddy’s got some work to do here,” he said and gently put her down on the floor. “Let’s go!”

  “Yay!”

  ****

  She was avoiding him.

  Since he came in with Kenny, Candace had been busy with one thing or the other. She had offered the girls some fruits and told them they could play on Lyric’s piano in her room and then promptly disappeared, too. Left alone in the living room, Aric had used the time to admire the interior of her house from where he sat. He loved what he saw. He could tell Candace was doing well for herself and wondered what she did for a living. If he could throw a wild guess, he would say she probably worked with the largest hospitality outlet in the city. After high school, she had won a scholarship to study culinary arts in Paris and had then gone off to bag a Masters in hospitality management.

  He stood and walked round the house looking at the pictures of her and her daughter hanging all over the walls. There wasn’t a man in any of them. A tiny part of him was glad. He admired the furniture and paintings on the wall and then settled to watch a wrestling match on the TV. When he got tired of seeing grown men sustain injuries all in the name of winning a gold belt, he went to check on the girls.

  He followed the sound of jerky piano notes and found the girls in a brightly painted room of pink and mint green. They were having a great time singing aloud and hitting the piano keys. Amidst singing and teaching Kenny what keys to press, Lyric and Kenny didn’t seem to miss their parents much. Turning away, Aric grunted. His daughter was torturing the poor piano.

  He went to find Candace next. She couldn’t avoid him forever.

  She was pulling out some plates out of the dishwasher in the kitchen when he saw her. He stood at the door for some time, simply looking at her from behind. Her butt was in the air as she went about the chore and he found himself remembering all those times they rode on a bicycle together. They had been teenagers and friends and nobody had seen anything wrong with her butt wedged in between his thighs while he rode. But most of the time, he had been hard wanting her but unable to do anything about it because she was his damn best friend.

  He also remembered holding that rounded butt in his palms and slamming into her with all the frustration and love he felt that one time. He still wanted her, he thought as he felt himself go hard.

  “Aric, what are you doing here?”

  He had been so lost in his thoughts, he hadn’t seen her turn to face him.

  “Figured since you would rather hide in here all night, I stood a better chance coming to find you.” He shrugged as he walked up to her.

  “I was just finishing up with dinner,” she said. She lifted her chin as if daring him to think otherwise.

  He could smell the food but nothing was simmering in any pot on the stove, at the moment. He could bet she was done cooking a while ago.

  “So when did you plan on telling me we had a daughter? When I am ninety-nine and about to die?”

  The hurt came rushing back to him. He still couldn’t believe she had kept something this huge away from him for eight years. No matter what, he’d deserved to know.

  “Not even then,” she said in a whisper, looking directly into his eyes.

  He couldn’t believe her. “You meant to take the secret of my baby to your grave?” he asked incredulously. “You never meant for me to meet her?”

  “What would you have me do?” she flared up at him. “You were married and I wasn’t about to destroy your marriage or become the other woman!”

  “That doesn’t matter,” he said. “I deserved to know that we had a baby together. She is my baby!”

  “No, she is not,” Candace hissed. “It takes more than a sperm donation to be called a father!”

  He was incensed by her accusations. He didn’t deserve her censure; he really didn’t. He was the wronged party here, damn it.

  “And whose fault is that, huh?” he fired back. “Whose fault is it that I couldn’t be a daddy to my little girl when she was born? Who ran away with my baby and never intended to breathe a word about it to me? You tell me, Candace because I don’t remember telling you I didn’t want this baby.”

  “Ha!” She laughed scathingly. “So you would have me knock on your door when you’d barely been back from your honeymoon to tell you I was pregnant?” Her eyes blazed with fury. “I’m sure Shawna would have loved that, too. She would have told me to move right in with her! And I am sure it would make the news: Aric Simmons knocks up his best friend!”

  There was fire in her rich, dark brown eyes as she glared at him. He was now toe to toe with her even though he didn’t remember moving. He felt such anger towards her for keeping their precious gift all to herself, for running away from him, for depriving him of her warmth and smile for all of these years. She was breathing heavily as he was, looking so fierce and unyielding that he was reminded of his daughter. She should have been the one who gave birth to Kenny.

  And she could well have – if only he had summoned enough courage back then to tell her how he really felt instead of hiding behind friendship. He wouldn’t have fallen into Shawna’s trap if he had.

  Suddenly, the fight went out of him as he realized that she was right.

  He had gotten married to Shawna and she had been pregnant with his baby. He realized just what kind of dilemma Candace would have been in when she discovered herself knocked up by her best friend.

  “Shit!” he murmured as all the fight drained out of him.

  She was still glaring at him. He found himself looking down into her eyes, remembering their one and only night together. That night, she had melted for him, giving him everything that she was. And he had told her by actions what he couldn’t say in words even though it was too late.

  Tonight, she was wearing a sleeveless top over a worn pair of jeans and he realized that despite everything, he couldn’t be angry with her, at least, not for long. Despite everything, he still wanted her badly. It felt like it was only yesterday they’d made love. Breathing hard, he searched her eyes even though he had no idea what he was looking for. He couldn’t be sure, but he thought he saw a flicker of desire in her eyes rising to meet his. The fight had left her, too.

  Her shoulders fell and she whirled around to stand by the sink, her back to him. “This isn’t going to get us anywhere,” she said.

  “No, it isn’t,” he agreed. He wiped his palms against his face as he tried to think.

  “You can’t blame me for taking Lyric,” she said barely above a whisper. “You simply can’t.” She drew in a deep breath and exhaled slowly. “I know you weren’t going to walk away from your marriage because of me.”

  She hadn’t the tiniest idea, he realized. For her, he would have done the craziest things back then. He was silent for a while as he watched her shoulders rise and fall as she tried to regain control.

  Slowly, he began to walk toward to her.

  “Guess you had no idea how much I wanted you back then,” he said into her ears when he was close enough. “I have no idea what I would have done if you had told me about the baby, but I sure as hell wouldn’t have let you go.”

  “You wanted me?” she turned into his arms, eyes wide and he found himself automatically wrapping his arms around her. She didn’t resist…and it felt like home.

  “Yes, I did, right from the very first time,” he said, finally letting out his best kept secret.

  She shook her head. “You never said a word.”

  He shook his head, too. “I was the homeless kid who got bounced around from foster home to foster home, remember? You had a stable home and parents who loved you while all I had was my brother who only cared about himself. Your folks were decent people with decent jobs and you were—are—beautiful and brilliant. How could I be ever good enough for you?”

  “I didn’t care about all of that!” she told him fiercely.

  And he believed her. He should have known – only Candace had befriended him when every other student in the school stuck up their noses in the air at him.

  “I liked you more than being my best buddy, but I thought friendship was all you wanted from me, all you would ever want.” She sighed. “At first, I thought you had a thing against dating a black woman since all your girlfriends were white. But, then, I saw your fiancée and I decided the problem must have been me all along. You just didn’t like me in that way; I was friend zoned. I couldn’t even begin to describe how much it hurt.”

  “Was that why you got drunk at my bachelor party?” he asked softly, caressing her shoulders. Some things were slowly falling into place now.

  She didn’t answer. She didn’t need to.

  “Everything’s messed up right now, isn’t it?” he said.

  They stayed that way for a long time – she with her back against her kitchen sink and he with his arms wrapped around her waist.

  “I’m sorry,” he said at last.

  She nodded. “Me too,” she said. “And I am sorry about Shawna. Kenny told Lyric and Lyric told me.”

  He shrugged. Shawna was the last person he wanted to think about right now.

  At the moment, all he could think of was all the moments he had lost, all the good times he could have had with Candace but didn’t just because they couldn’t tell each other how they felt. He was a fool for wasting nine years married to a woman he didn’t love. Everything was a colossal waste.

  His fingers dug into her skin as he slowly drew her to him. Her hands splayed against his chest; he let his hands wander up her bare arms and he felt her shiver a bit. Her chest fell and rose against his as she stood in front of him. At five feet ten against his six-feet-three, she was the only woman that ever really matched his height; the perfect woman for him. His regret deepened.

  He started to lean into her.

  “Mom!”

  “Dad!”

  Well, maybe not a total waste. He smiled as he slowly and reluctantly let go of her. He had two wonderful daughters and Candace was here right now, wasn’t she?

  “In here!” Candace said out loud to the girls. She quickly moved away from the sink, but not before she gave him one last, lingering look that told him she was very much as affected as he was by their little encounter and knew what he was about to do.

  “I’m glad I found you again, Candy,” he whispered just as the girls burst into the kitchen.

  She didn’t say a word but he could tell by the way her lips curved up gently that she heard him. And that she was glad, too.

  *****

  “Kenny is such a wonderful kid, you did right raising her.”

  Aric smiled at Candace’s words as she closed the door to the girls’ room. It had taken a while but they finally got the girls to sleep. They had been so excited about sharing a room that they couldn’t sleep for fear of finding the other gone in the morning. It had taken tucking them both in Lyric’s bed, instead of in separate beds in the same room as originally planned, to get them to sleep. Kenny, in particular, had been the more obstinate of the two, insisting that she was not going to sleep a wink unless she held on to Lyric’s hand.

  “Or she is quite a handful, you mean?” Aric laughed.

  “Well, she is that,” Candace smiled ruefully. “But she is also delightful and super active. She minds her manners, too.”

  “But not as much as Lyric does,” Aric observed. “Lyric is what you call a gentle lady through and through. Sometimes, I wonder if Kenny thinks she’s a boy.”

  Candace laughed. “Don’t say that,” she said, jostling him by the elbow.

  They were now back in the living room.

  “Thanks for having her over, Candace.”

  “As if those two would have it any other way.” She smiled.

  “But you didn’t have to feed me dinner either,” he said, rubbing his stomach. “Thank you.” He had forgotten just what a great cook she was. A serving of prawns, brown rice, greens and sauce had reminded him of just that. He had even asked for a second helping.

  “It was my pleasure. It’s only been Lyric and me, so believe me when I say I am glad to cook for someone else for a change.”

  Aric tried not to read too much meaning into her casually spoken words. He was dying to ask her if there was a man somewhere but he couldn’t quite yet. He wasn’t sure he was ready to hear the answer.

  “You’ll be fine with the girls?” he asked as they made their way to the door.

  “Yeah, sure. You did say that Kenny rarely wakes up in the middle of the night?”

  “Yeah.”

  “We will be fine,” she assured him.

  He was at the door but he found that he was not looking forward to crossing the threshold and walking the few feet to his car.

  He turned to look at Candace. The light above the door shone down into her face and he thought she couldn’t look more beautiful even after a day’s work, making them dinner and battling two eight-year-olds to sleep.

  “Thank you for a wonderful night,” he said again. “I am glad we met again.”

  She was looking like she couldn’t decide if she was glad or not. He didn’t blame her. He was still reeling over the fact that he had a daughter he never knew about – with her!

  “What do you want to do about Lyric?” she asked him softly. She wasn’t one who beat about the bush.

  He could see her lips trembling slightly and her eyes appeared overly bright. She must think he wanted to take her daughter from her. He felt the urgent need to reassure her as well as himself.

  He didn’t answer her question. Instead, he asked the one he was dying to know the answer to since yesterday. “You named her after me, didn’t you?”

  “Yes.” She lifted her chin. “Her name is Lyric Jamila.”

  He then went about answering the question she’d asked just a few seconds ago. “To be honest, I don’t know yet. I am just glad to have you both around me and Kennedy.”

  Candace nodded, seemingly satisfied with his answer. The door was opened and the wind picked her loose hair to play with. He couldn’t resist reaching out for a few strands.

  “Your hair,” he said as he rolled the hair between his fingers. “You kept it long.”

  She smiled a little. “I told my hairdresser that I’ll give her the go-ahead to cut it. After all, long hair and motherhood don’t always work for me…but I just never got around to doing the dirty deed.”