‘Yes, he was very busy,’ she said, turning her back on Lesley and focusing instead on the kettle.

  ‘Well, please pass on our condolences to your husband and his family,’ said the head, and then, as if his pastoral duty was fulfilled, he floated away.

  ‘Wasn’t there some rumour about him?’ Lesley continued.

  Caroline didn’t respond, reaching for a mug from the cupboard and a teabag from the caddy.

  ‘I heard that he’d been involved in something . . . now, what was it?’ Lesley fell silent for a moment whilst she apparently wracked her brains, and Caroline wished she would just be quiet. Not only did she not want her private family business discussed in the staff room, but it was also so insensitive and disrespectful to be raking over rumours when Tony was barely cold.

  ‘I know!’ said Lesley. ‘It was that new shopping centre, the out-of-town one. It didn’t have planning permission, and then suddenly it did, or something. Wasn’t there some suggestion that one of the planners was in league with the developer? Not Tony, of course,’ she added quickly with an expression that suggested exactly this suspicion. ‘It was just that it happened on his watch.’

  Caroline shook her head dismissively. ‘I don’t know. I don’t know anything about it, but I think it sounds unlikely. Tony was a highly respected councillor. He wouldn’t have been elected so many times if he hadn’t been. And actually, Lesley,’ she continued, turning to face her adversary, her expression steely – ‘I’m not sure how appropriate it is to be suggesting anything untoward. Not only was he my much-loved father-in-law but it’s also been a huge shock for all of us. I’d much rather you kept your rumours to yourself.’

  With that, Caroline turned on her heel and left the room, abandoning her cup of tea in the process. She could feel her blood boiling in her veins as she returned to the office, the heat building in her body. She’d never liked Lesley, she was a nasty piece of work – anything for a reaction, that was her motto. But Caroline had probably just played straight into her hands, and in front of other people too. There’s no smoke without fire, she’d be saying now, or words to that effect, and the same thought would be tracking through the minds of all the other witnesses to the exchange. People really didn’t have any idea of the damage that such careless accusations could do. Caroline, however, knew only too well.

  She collapsed into her chair, her heart thundering in her chest as her pulse rose. She closed her eyes and sucked in a breath through her mouth until she felt herself calm a little. She had met people like Lesley before. They were so quick to have a go; all they needed was a tiny little slit in someone’s armour and they’d be in there, jabbing and twisting until something was done or said that confirmed their suspicions.

  That was how it had been with her dad. It had never been proved that he had stolen money from the fund he was in charge of, but in the end that hadn’t mattered. The money was missing, and he was put firmly in the frame for it. Eventually no one cared what had happened; they just wanted someone to blame.

  There had been an accident at the football club where her dad had been a coach. A boy a few years older than Caroline and former star of the club had broken his neck diving into the river and the club had been raising money to buy him a state-of-the-art wheelchair. They had raised thousands of pounds and were nearly at the target when the theft was discovered. The money had gone from the account that her father had joint control of.

  Caroline had been too young to really understand the vitriol that followed. All she knew was that girls who had been her friends were now turning their backs on her in the playground and calling nasty names after her in the street. She understood later that her mother had endured far worse. The injured boy’s family had begun a concentrated hate campaign against them, and it got so bad that Caroline and her mother hadn’t dared leave the house. They sheltered indoors, curtains closed, whilst the mob outside chanted threatening slogans. Next came bricks through the windows and worse through the letterbox. Her father had abandoned them, unable to cope with either the taunting or the guilt – Caroline never knew which – and in the end Caroline and her mother had been forced to relocate to a new area where no one knew them. Her mother had never recovered. She had gone from being happy and fun-loving to a woman afraid of her own shadow. Three lives destroyed by gossip and rumour.

  Lesley might have thought what she was saying was harmless, but Caroline knew better. And Tony wasn’t even here to defend himself, because that’s what he’d have done, Caroline knew. He was always telling them the rumours that he’d heard about himself, dismissing them as sour grapes or just laughing them off as ludicrous.

  ‘That’s the trouble with public office,’ he’d said. ‘Everyone will have a pop, even those who have nothing to do with the situation and know even less. All they see is the final decision. That’s what they question. What they don’t see is the hours of work that go on behind the scenes, the toing and froing between the planners and the developers, the public consultations, the discussions in the chamber. It can take us weeks to reach the right decision and it can get quite heated. But that’s because the decisions we’re making are important. They affect people’s lives. We have to get it right. But of course, Joe Public doesn’t know any of that. They just read the final outcome in the paper and automatically assume there’s been something dodgy going on. We just have to rise above it all and keep our mouths shut. It’s never easy.’

  Caroline wished Tony was here right now so he could make that same speech in the staff room. She should probably have tried saying something similar herself instead of just running away. It was too late now, though. If she tried, it would just look like she was protesting too much and that there was definitely something to cover up. God, she hated Lesley Hungerford.

  The bell rang and people began to emerge from the staff room to go to their classrooms. Caroline lowered her head and pretended to be concentrating on the papers on her desk, but she could feel their eyes on the back of her neck as they each walked past. Or maybe she was just imagining it. Having been the brunt of gossip and rumour could do that to you. Then she felt someone standing close by her and she looked up. It was Joanne. She put a cup of tea down on the desk next to Caroline.

  ‘Take no notice,’ she said quietly. ‘The woman’s a bitch. She just likes causing trouble.’

  Caroline smiled weakly and whispered a thank you.

  ‘He was a good man,’ she said, feeling hot tears spring into her eyes and wiping them away with the back of her knuckles.

  ‘Of course he was,’ replied Joanne emphatically, and then went back to her own desk. The trouble was, Caroline wasn’t entirely sure she believed that any more.

  27

  Ellie had been so pleased with her new table settings that as soon as she’d returned home after picking the girls up, she had unwrapped them from their tissue paper and admired them all individually. She had even laid a portion of the table just so she could imagine the finished look. She was right about that wall colour, though. The dark red really didn’t go with the silver and was actually looking quite dated now. It had been all the rage when she’d had it done, but things had moved on to crisper, cooler colours. She would give her decorator a ring and get him booked in. She might get him to do the hall whilst he was at it, and the downstairs cloakroom. It was important to make a good impression on any visitors and those were the parts of the house they generally saw.

  It had been a while since she and James had hosted a dinner party, now she came to think about it, other than Caro and Max coming round, which didn’t really count. Ellie ran through a list in her head of the places where she and James had eaten recently and who they owed. Most of the dinners had been return invitations, but there’d been a new couple at Laura and Mark’s who they’d got on well with. Maybe she would ask them, with Laura and Mark, of course, and try to build up a bit of a friendship. What had they been called? Sara, that was the woman and . . . Ellie struggled to bring the name of the husband into her mind. She’d always been so good with names. What was happening to her? It began with a C, she was almost certain, something a bit unusual. Charles? Claude? No, Clive, that was it. Sara and Clive. Yes, she’d ring the decorator, and then fix a return date with the four of them after the rooms had been freshened up.

  Ellie smiled to herself, pleased with her new plan. She began to dismantle the table setting and then, after a little bit of shuffling around, made room for the new items in the sideboard, except for the candelabra. She left those on the table where she could admire them.

  She must also have left the receipt out. She had a little wooden box in which she kept all her receipts in case she needed them again, clearing it out every few months so it didn’t become over full, but on this occasion, she’d put the receipt to one side and then forgotten to pick it up. So when James stormed into the kitchen brandishing it above his head, she was thrown for a minute.

  ‘What the hell is this?’ he said, thrusting the receipt under her nose and then pulling it away again before her eyes had a chance to register what they’d seen.

  ‘I don’t know, James. Let me have a proper look.’

  But James was reading from it now, his voice rising as he listed each item. ‘Eight chargers. Eight tea-light holders. Table runner. Two candelabra. Two hundred and thirty-eight pounds.’

  Ellie was taken aback, not quite sure why James was angry nor what she was supposed to say.

  ‘What about them?’ she asked. ‘I thought the dining room needed a spruce-up so I bought a few bits and pieces. It’s only two hundred and fifty quid, James. I spend almost that much in the supermarket each week. I’ll show you what I bought if you like. You’ll like them. And I was thinking that we could change the colour of . . .’

  ‘It’s all just crap, Ellie,’ he snapped. ‘Tatty crap. And we don’t need any of it. There’s nothing wrong with the dining room the way it is.’

  ‘Well, no,’ Ellie conceded. ‘But it is looking a bit tired and I know how you like the place to look good when we invite your business contacts round.’ She could feel her cheeks flare. She wasn’t used to being shouted at, especially not for something like this. James loved how beautifully she kept the house; he was always saying so.

  ‘I’m sorry,’ she said quietly. ‘I thought you’d be pleased.’ She thought she might cry, the shock at his anger releasing sudden emotion. Her eyes brimmed with tears and she blinked hard.

  ‘Pleased that you insist on spending above our means?’ spat James.

  His nostrils were flaring as they did when he lost his temper and Ellie found herself momentarily distracted by that. When had James last lost his temper? She couldn’t remember. It had been a while.

  ‘Money doesn’t grow on trees, you know,’ he continued. ‘We can’t just print some more when we need it.’

  ‘Yes, I realise that,’ she said. She wasn’t stupid and she hated it when he talked down to her, as though things were too complicated for her to grasp.

  ‘And don’t get me started on how much this party of yours is costing,’ he said, folding his arms across his chest and glaring at her. ‘I swear several minor royals could get married for less than our credit card bill last month. Honestly, Els, you just don’t get the concept of moderation, do you?’

  ‘Now hang on,’ replied Ellie indignantly. ‘You’re hardly one to talk. It’s not two minutes ago that you bought that car. There was nothing wrong with the old one.’

  ‘That’s work. It’s different,’ replied James, his tone verging on the petulant.

  Ellie didn’t see how. It was all money. But she had made her point and she knew she would be on a hiding to nothing pushing it any further. At the end of the day, James could always trump her in this argument, because any money that she had was earned by James, and whilst he said over and over that it was one pot and that she contributed to the household in a non-financial way, they couldn’t avoid the truth that she never paid in to their account, only drew out.

  ‘I’m going out,’ said James before she’d had time to think where to take the argument next. He was already stalking towards the door. He snatched the car keys from the countertop. ‘I’ll be late for dinner.’

  And then he was gone, door slamming behind him.

  Ellie burst into tears. It was the shock of being spoken to like that rather than anything he had said. How dare he have a go? If he didn’t like the way she behaved he should talk to her about it reasonably, not fly off the handle at the drop of a hat. What if the girls had seen him shouting at her? How would she explain Mummy and Daddy arguing to a pair of impressionable children? Olivia had already asked her if they were going to get a divorce when she and James had had a tiny spat over something so trivial that she couldn’t even bring it to mind now. How would they react to an actual argument? It might damage them forever. Ellie knew this was unlikely, but she was angry with James so she let her fury burn itself out along this unlikely path for a while whilst she calmed down.

  Then she rang Caroline. It was an automatic reaction, but as the phone rang out and Caroline’s answerphone message played in her ear, she realised that she couldn’t talk to Caroline about it. Even though she told her everything and had done for as long as she could remember, this was different. Private. Ellie wasn’t sure why, but something was telling her that she should keep this to herself.

  James came back when she was emptying the dishwasher. The girls were already bathed and in bed. She had concocted a story about a meeting to cover James’s absence, but that wasn’t so unusual and they had just accepted it without question.

  He came straight over to her and put his arms around her, pulling her into a tight squeeze, and Ellie breathed in the familiar smell of him. She loved that their bodies seemed to know exactly how to align with one another. Even when the chips were down, they fitted together, two becoming one. She felt his arms pull her in even closer, as if he were trying to absorb her into him.

  ‘I’m sorry, Els,’ he said into her hair. ‘I had no right to speak to you like that. It was a total overreaction to something so trivial. I’m sure the things you bought are great. And I love that you keep the house so beautifully for us. It’s a big job and you do it really well.’

  Ellie nodded her head against his chest, accepting his apology at once. But there was more here, she could feel it.

  ‘Thank you,’ she said. ‘But I don’t understand what the issue was.’

  James released her from the hug and pushed her gently away from him so she was at arm’s length.

  ‘I’m just a bit stressed, that’s all,’ he said. ‘It’s not going that well this month. There’s nothing for you to worry about, but a couple of deals I had thought were bolted on have collapsed. I can probably get them back but it’ll just take a bit longer than I expected. I guess it’s just on my mind, so when I saw the receipt . . . Anyway, I’m sorry.’

  He did look sorry, Ellie thought, but mainly he looked tired. The plum-coloured semicircles beneath his eyes were darker than usual and his skin was sallow. He really needed a holiday. They should get a last-minute deal booked like they’d discussed, but this probably wasn’t the moment to suggest that.

  ‘I can take the things back,’ she said. ‘It’s no trouble.’

  ‘Don’t be silly,’ he said. ‘It’s only a couple of hundred quid. And I bet they’ll look lovely.’

  Ellie nodded enthusiastically. ‘They will. You’ll really like them. Did you see the candelabra? They are on the table in the dining room. I thought we could change the colour in there from the red to a nice rich blue. What do you think? It’s on my list to ring the decorator.’

  James nodded, taking it all in, but he said, ‘Let’s put that on hold for now, just until I know where we are with these deals. We can do it next month instead.’

  ‘Okay,’ replied Ellie. ‘And I can keep the table settings?’

  ‘Of course,’ he said gently.

  28

  It was Friday and the Frost family were finally getting together to make decisions about the funeral. Caroline suggested they order food in, and Ellie was happy to go along with that. Their boys were at a sleepover, so Ellie fed Olivia and Lucy before Caro and Max arrived, giving them pizza from the supermarket and trying to pretend it was just as good as a takeaway one. Olivia moaned that they were missing out, but Ellie wasn’t in the mood and slapped down her complaints.

  When Caroline and Max arrived, Caroline was bearing a plate covered with tinfoil.

  ‘I know we said takeaway, but I thought we might want something sweet afterwards,’ she explained, offering the plate to Ellie.

  Ellie lifted the foil and took a peek. A delicious warm chocolatey smell flooded her nostrils.

  ‘Your amazing brownies. My favourite. That’s so thoughtful. Thanks, Caro.’ She leant over and gave her friend a peck on her cheek and Caroline responded with a modest smile.

  ‘I thought we could all do with a little bit of comfort food,’ she said. ‘Is Nathan here yet?’

  ‘Not coming,’ said James, who appeared from his office.

  ‘What?’ said Max, passing Ellie a bottle of wine and hugging her in one smooth movement. ‘Typical. What’s his excuse?’

  ‘Caught up with something he can’t get out of, apparently,’ replied James, his face suggesting that he didn’t believe a word of it.

  ‘It doesn’t matter,’ said Ellie quickly. ‘He’s not interested in the details anyway and too many cooks and all that.’

  Max squeezed his lips together and let out an audible breath through his nose. ‘I’ve got something else we need to talk about,’ he said. ‘Something we should all be here for.’

  Ellie saw Caroline shoot him a look, eyebrows knotted.

  ‘We have to tell them tonight,’ Max said to her and Caroline signalled her agreement with a single tight nod.

  ‘How mysterious you’re being, Max,’ said James, cocking an eyebrow. ‘All very cloak and dagger. Well, maybe we can ring him later. See if we can get him on a video call.’