Elena pressed her lips together.

  “Since Robbie’s gone back to Seattle there’s only been three texts. Literally.”

  “I know you’re worried but she’s probably just focused on her uncle.”

  “And I want her to be focused on him. But this is a medical thing—and she’s told me hospitals and medical stuff freak her out. So why isn’t she talking to me?”

  “Maybe she’s overwhelmed?”

  It was a reasonable explanation and exactly why Devyn had tried to give Robbie space. “I keep thinking that the one time we hear from distant relatives, exes, anyone, is when someone is in the hospital.”

  “True.” Elena made a cringey face. “And we get asked to be a remote second opinion.”

  “I know that’s not fun, or easy, but I expected it. I thought she’d want to talk to me about what was going on.” Tears welled in her eyes, but she clenched her jaw, keeping them at bay. “I want to know how she’s doing, but we aren’t in a relationship. We’re not…anything.”

  She hadn’t told Elena everything that had happened, but she’d admitted enough—including how happy she was with Robbie. Now Elena’s look of sympathy made her wish she’d kept that to herself. Sympathy made it harder to pretend her heart hadn’t gotten involved. “Anyway. I’m sorry, but I don’t think I’m up for sailing.” She started walking again but Elena caught her arm.

  “You’re not getting out of this conversation that easily. Where’s Angel?”

  “At doggie day care.”

  “Go get him. The two of you are coming over for dinner.” When Devyn started to argue, Elena held up her hand. “I know the look on your face. I’ve seen it before. We are going to open a bottle of wine and talk and Mari is going to feed us an amazing dinner. End of discussion.”

  She sighed. “You’re such a surgeon sometimes.” Arguing was pointless and she knew it. “But, also, thank you. Dinner with you and Mari is probably what I need.”

  “Of course it is. I know what I’m doing.” Elena opened her arms and Devyn stepped into her embrace. The hug almost pushed her emotions to the brink, and she broke away before the tears came.

  Angel didn’t leap into her arms like he did when he saw Robbie. She’d taught him not to jump but he also had never tried the move. Still, he was excited to see her, hopping up and down on his front feet and howling for good measure. He didn’t mind going to day care, which helped make it easier on her emotions having no other option, but he loved leaving. She didn’t try to tamp down his excitement as they headed to the car.

  Devyn checked her phone after snapping her seat belt. The checking and hoping for a text had become too much of a habit. She knew that and yet she couldn’t bring herself to break the habit. Five days had gone by and she’d reread the three texts Robbie had sent too many times. The first simply said: Landed.

  She’d given Robbie grace, and space, when the next text said: The doc says it was a mild stroke but Uncle Bruce looks terrible. I need to focus on getting him better and not on how much I hate hospitals.

  She’d expected more news to follow. Like she’d told Elena, she’d expected Robbie to want to talk to her about what was going on. She’d hoped for updates as well as some peek into Robbie’s world in Seattle. And she’d desperately wanted some sign that what they had wasn’t over. Blown out as easy as a candle.

  Mari opened the door in an apron. She took one look at Devyn and pulled her into a hug. “Elena told me.”

  Devyn returned the embrace but let go before the tears escaped. She rubbed at her eyes and said, “Thanks for having us over last minute. Angel got excited as soon as I turned down your block. I hope I’m not—”

  “Stop,” Mari said, waving off her words. “You know I always cook for a family of six. And I would have made Elena drive over to get you if you hadn’t come on your own.” She crossed her arms, studying Devyn. “Why didn’t you call?”

  “There wasn’t much to say.”

  “You and I both know that isn’t true.”

  “Are you two coming?” Elena’s voice came from somewhere in the house. “Mari, I’m not sure how long you wanted to keep this bread in the oven.”

  Mari sighed. “The woman does complicated surgeries all day, but put her in front of an oven and she folds under pressure.”

  Devyn felt a smile lift her lips. She needed her friends tonight. “Elena’s never been much of a cook.”

  “I can hear you two, you know?” Elena called. “How brown should this bread get?”

  Mari motioned Devyn to follow, calling to Elena that the dinner rescue crew was on its way. Angel felt nearly as comfortable at Mari and Elena’s as he did at Devyn’s. Fortunately, he didn’t feel comfortable enough to bark at the cats who were the kings of the house. Both cats appeared as they entered the kitchen, and each issued a hiss in response to the sight of a dog. Angel took the advice to heart and wagged his tail between his legs.

  “Look who’s feeling meek all of a sudden,” Mari said, looking at Angel but swinging her hip to bump Elena’s as she moved her away from the oven.

  “These are the only two cats Angel won’t bark at,” Devyn said. “He knows he’s in the presence of royalty—who will kick his ass.”

  Elena, who’d handed off the oven mitt she’d put on, pointed at Angel. “We know when to bow down, don’t we, buddy?”

  “Bow down?” Mari scoffed. “You know when to call for help.”

  “That too.” Elena laughed easily. “Dev, red or white?”

  “Whatever’s open.”

  “Chardonnay. Because there’s fish in the soup and Mari insists we have to drink white wine with fish.” Elena raised the open bottle, waited for Devyn’s nod, and then poured her a glass. “Sit. Talk.”

  “Or the interrogation will begin,” Mari added jokingly.

  Elena joined Devyn at the table, arguing there wouldn’t be any interrogation. Devyn believed Mari more than Elena in this case and said as much. She wanted to open up and talk. She wanted to admit to the feelings she’d been holding in for the past few weeks. But she couldn’t think of where to begin.

  “Do you think Angel misses Robbie?” Mari asked, spooning the soup into three bowls. “You said he really took to her.”

  She glanced at Angel. “I don’t know. He’s gone to scratch at the cottage door a few times, but I don’t know what he’s thinking. I know I miss her.” Emotion hit like a sleeper wave. She clenched her jaw and set down her wineglass. “I can’t believe I let myself fall in love. It was stupid in so many ways.”

  “What ways?” Elena asked gently.

  Devyn looked up at the ceiling. “I told myself I didn’t want to date anyone after Matt. I didn’t want another relationship that I didn’t have the time for. You know what our job is like. I don’t want to let someone else down when I can’t meet their expectations.” She took a deep breath. “And the divorce isn’t even finalized until we sell the house. I didn’t plan on this. A month ago, I would have sworn I didn’t want anything like this. It just…happened.”

  “So you think it’s stupid you fell in love without planning on it.” Elena nodded. “What else?”

  The way Elena rephrased her words made her realize how ridiculous it was to give her heart a hard time. Who planned on falling in love? She’d tried to love Matt and it had never happened. “She lives in Seattle. Not once did she give me any hint that she wanted to move here.”

  “And you’d never do a long-distance relationship?” Mari asked, setting a bowl of steaming soup in front of Devyn and another in front of Elena. “Wait for the bread.”

  Elena pulled back her hands and Devyn said, “It’s funny you think you’re in charge.”

  “I am in charge.”

  “In the bedroom.” Mari arched an eyebrow as she set the bread basket in the middle of the table. She playfully scooted it out of Elena’s reach, offering it to Devyn when Elena tried to get a piece. “Guests first.”

  “Devyn’s not a guest,” Elena argued. “She’s family.”

  “True. And I’m in charge in the kitchen.”

  Elena dropped her chin in acquiescence.

  “But you’re cute.” Mari handed Elena a hunk of a baguette and kissed her. “And if you play your cards right, I might let you pretend to be in charge later and do the dishes.”

  Devyn smiled at Elena’s mock gasp. She knew her friends had their ups and downs, but she admired the relationship they’d built. She admired it, and she wished she had something like it.

  “Devyn,” Mari said, motioning to her with the remainder of the baguette. “You didn’t answer the long-distance question.”

  “I’ve thought about it. I’d consider long distance but not without some chance for a future that wasn’t long distance.” Before Robbie’s abrupt departure, she’d given it plenty of thought. The problem was, she knew long-distance wouldn’t work for more than a short period. She could only imagine doing it if she knew that at some point they’d live in the same place. And call the same spot home.

  “You both know I can’t get away for a weekend the way some people can. Robbie could, but I wouldn’t want to ask her to be the one always traveling to see me. And, honestly, I want someone I can come home to. The past month has made me realize that more than ever.”

  Life with Matt had been a roommate situation for so long she hadn’t realized how nice it was coming home to someone she wanted to see. The realization that she liked regular intimacy came as even more of a surprise. She’d never thought she’d crave more than hugs and occasional kisses. With Robbie, she’d craved sex and thought of it more than she had at any other point in her life.

  “I couldn’t do long distance either,” Elena said.

  Mari sat down with the last bowl of soup. “It works for some couples.” She reached for her spoon. “So we’ve decided it was stupid to fall in love because you didn’t plan it, aren’t sure you want a relationship, and because she doesn’t live here. Is that it?”

  “That feels like enough.”

  “Maybe it is,” Elena conceded. “If neither of you can move and you don’t want long-distance forever…”

  Devyn felt a heaviness settle over her. Having her friends confirm everything she’d wrestled with over the last week made her feel more hopeless than ever.

  Mari gestured to the food, saying, “Bon appétit.”

  Elena took a bite of the soup, complimented Mari, and then turned back to Devyn. “Did you ask her if she’d ever move here?”

  “They were only together for three weeks,” Mari chided. “You can’t ask someone that after only three weeks. Dev, try the soup.”

  Devyn didn’t have an appetite now, but she picked up her spoon. The soup scalded her tongue and she instantly thought of the night Robbie had made her tea. Robbie’s words repeated in her mind: If it’s hot enough, you’ll burn your tongue and you won’t think of anything else.

  “You okay?” Elena touched her arm.

  “I will be.” She forced herself to take another bite, careful to blow on it first. “This is delicious, Mari.”

  “My abuela’s recipe.” Mari tasted hers and murmured her approval. “She would tell me I added too much spice, but I love the kick the cayenne adds.”

  Devyn wondered what Robbie would say about the soup. They’d had more than a few conversations about the food Robbie made and the unique ingredients she’d add to typical meals, making them feel entirely new. Like green salsa mixed in tuna salad. And molasses in whipped cream.

  “I’m not saying it would be wrong to ask Robbie if she’d move here,” Mari said. “But I think it’s early. You two would need to figure out a lot of other things first, I’m sure.”

  Devyn nodded. “And I’ve hardly heard from her since she went back to Seattle. I know she’s helping her uncle, so I don’t want to bother her, but the reality is she’s gone back to her life.” Her stomach tightened and she set down her spoon. “I think whatever we had is over. My life is here, and even if she wanted to, I don’t think Robbie would ever leave Seattle.”

  Mari and Elena looked at each other. Something passed between them and Devyn wondered if they agreed with her assessment. She stopped herself from asking. She didn’t want confirmation.

  “Maybe a relationship with Robbie can’t work, but you could give someone else a chance,” Elena suggested. “You’ve been so happy this past month. Happier than I’ve seen you in a long time.”

  Mari nodded her agreement. “Would you consider something with another woman?”

  That was hard to answer. Her heart was stuck on Robbie and she didn’t want to think of anyone else. “I don’t feel ready to think about that yet. I didn’t even want Robbie.”

  “And look how well that turned out.”

  Devyn narrowed her eyes at Elena. “I wouldn’t say it turned out well.”

  “I meant you had fun. You let loose and enjoyed yourself. It was pretty incredible to watch from the outside. Even if it hurts now, I think you’d say it was worth it.” Elena continued, “What if the next step is looking for something more serious? Maybe Robbie was your rebound and the next step is a real relationship.”

  She felt a lump in her throat. She couldn’t think of Robbie as a rebound. The word alone tore apart what they’d shared.

  What she’d had in three weeks with Robbie was more than what she’d had in six years with Matt. And she’d had plenty of time to get over things not working out with Matt on her own. She hadn’t needed a rebound.

  She thought of suturing Robbie’s hand and then trusting her to take care of everything at the ER with Angel. She thought of the tiling project they’d done together and how much she’d enjoyed the work because she was with Robbie. Then she thought of the moment she’d realized she was in love as they’d paddleboarded around the bay. Even without the best-ever sex, she couldn’t call Robbie a rebound. But that didn’t change the reality that there seemed to be no future together.

  “Do you have other parameters for a relationship beyond the no-long-distance part?” Mari asked.

  “Watch out. She’ll have you set up with someone in no time,” Elena joked.

  “Well, now that we know she likes butch women,” Mari said, “I happen to know someone who’s single and moving back to San Diego.”

  “Who?” Elena asked.

  “Lou.” Mari turned back to Devyn and added, “My old college roommate. I’ve told you about her. The lawyer?”

  Devyn vaguely remembered Mari mentioning her lawyer friend.

  “She’s a bit of a player but I know she’s ready to settle down.”

  “A bit of a player?” Elena raised an eyebrow. “I don’t know about setting Devyn up with Lou. Do I have veto rights?”

  Mari ignored Elena’s question. “Lou used to live in San Diego but she moved to San Francisco when she fell for this woman she shouldn’t have looked at twice. There were so many red flags.” Mari looked to Elena for backup. “Then the woman cheated on her. It was a whole thing.”

  “Lou makes everything a whole thing,” Elena said. “She’s a lot of drama, Mari.”

  “That was the old Lou. She’s matured.” Mari pointedly looked at Devyn when she added, “Anyway, she’s in town this weekend checking out rentals. You two would be perfect together.” She waited for Devyn to show some interest. “I could see if she wanted to have dinner with us. Double date?”

  She didn’t want to think about anyone besides Robbie—even if it wasn’t healthy pining for someone who didn’t return her messages and who couldn’t ever be in her world.

  “What if it’s not a date?” Elena asked. “We could all go sailing. If Lou’s in town this weekend the weather is supposed to be perfect tomorrow.” To Devyn she added, “Lou and Mari used to sail together in college.”

  “I thought you were the one who didn’t want to set me up with this person.”

  “It’d only be sailing,” Mari said, latching on to the idea. She leaned close and kissed Elena’s cheek. “You always have the best ideas. What do you think, Devyn?”

  “I want to stay home and mope with Angel.” Pathetic, but true.

  Elena set her hand on Devyn’s. “You know moping won’t help. At least sailing might get you out of your head for a while.”

  “It’ll be nice out on the water,” Mari added.

  Maybe she did need to get out of her head for a while. “I’ll think about it.”

  Chapter Twenty-Five

  Robbie finished adding the last of her uncle’s pills to the container and snapped the lid closed. “One week of meds. Look how easy this is going to be.”

  Uncle Bruce didn’t make eye contact. He shifted back in the recliner and studied the scene out the window. Rain. Again.

  “You happy to be home?” She’d tried engaging him for the past hour, but her questions were met with one-word answers or, as he demonstrated now, an unconvincing nod. The speech therapist who’d checked on him the day after the stroke had happily reported no problems, saying he was lucky to have fared so well. She was the one, though, who had mentioned depression often followed a stroke event. Robbie knew she was seeing the signs. Uncle Bruce had always been moody but nothing like now. Fortunately, one of the meds in his mix was an antidepressant. Hopefully it would kick in soon.

  “I know you’re not happy they’ve got you restricted to the house, but another fall—”

  “I know. I don’t need to hear it again.”

  “Wow. That’s more words than you’ve said all day, Mr. Price. Progress.” She hoped the sarcasm would at least get an eye roll, but his gaze didn’t leave the window. She never called him anything except Bruce or Uncle Bruce—though they both knew Dad would have been a more apt title.

  She cleared her throat. “I’m all set to sleep in my old room. Cleared out some of the things you’d wanted to send to Goodwill. Cleaned up your room, too. Hope you don’t mind sleeping in fresh sheets.”