“Breathe. Slow,” he coaxes softly.

  I focus on doing what he says. It takes several seconds, but at last, I’m breathing normally. Tears threaten. Not from fear but frustration. He cradles my jaw.

  “It’s okay. We have the rest of our lives to make love. I’m not going anywhere. I swear,” he vows.

  “No,” I say firmly. “I’m not going to let him win. Not now. Not tonight. More.”

  “Anya,” Paddy draws out my name.

  “More. Please.” It’s a thready cry.

  Indecision wars within him. It’s written on his face. I rear up and kiss him, pulling him down to me. He sighs in resignation against my lips. It’s slow at first, the build-up. Every touch is tentative. Cautious. Full of worry. Both mine and his. Until we both start gaining confidence again. The night is still early. We have plenty of time.

  Soon, it’s as though the moment never happened. We’ve both pushed it out of our memories. Our kisses grow more frenetic. Desperate. He takes the familiar path he’d only recently veered from, and hot, wet heat closes around my breast. He gives both of them the same thorough attention.

  Paddy presses light kisses down my stomach. He reaches one spot, and I giggle. “It tickles.”

  Thankfully, he doesn’t torment me. At least, not in that way. He tortures me sweetly in others. His tongue glides along the waistband of my shorts. To add to the torturous pleasure, both hands palm my breasts. It’s as though he’s discovered there’s a string attached between them and my center. He plucks the string, sending waves of arousal coursing through me.

  “More,” I gasp out, my nails digging into his scalp.

  “Eyes on me,” Paddy commands in a low tone I can only obey.

  I focus on him lying between my thighs, his broad shoulders spreading them wide. His lips are wet and pink. Wetness pours out of me. I’m soaking wet in a way I’m not sure I ever have been before.

  His gaze doesn’t leave mine as he slowly lowers my shorts. I raise my hips to help, and despite his order, I can’t help but shift my gaze shyly away from his. Will he like what he sees? I haven’t really kept up with feminine grooming. Does he prefer bare skin? Will the curls down there bother him?

  “Hey,” he says softly. “You’re doing that really loud thinking again.”

  My eyes jerk to meet his. He’s wearing his gentle smile.

  “Am I?” I whisper.

  “You are. It’s deafening, in fact.”

  “What am I thinking this time?”

  He caresses my cheek. “You’re thinking to yourself how lucky your husband is to have a fecking gorgeous woman like you as his wife. And that there’s no one else in the world who turns him on like you do.”

  My heart swells to almost bursting. A sheen covers my eyes. It’s like Paddy truly does know exactly what I’m thinking. “More,” I tell him.

  There’s only a slight hesitation before his fingers carefully glide through my slickness. I tense a little. He stops. Just like that.

  It’s going to be all right.

  The fact that he stopped makes me relax. This is Paddy. He’s safe. He won’t hurt me. He loves me.

  “I love you,” he says as though reading my mind.

  “I love you, too.”

  As if my words are permission, he starts to move again. Slowly he rubs his fingers up and down, wetting them. He grazes my clit on an upward swipe, and it’s like he plucked one of the strings on Rory’s guitar. It vibrates through my whole body. All I want to do is rub myself harder against his fingers. Anything to increase the pressure and friction. I just need to move.

  My hips roll, seeking more. Paddy answers. His touch grows bolder. More persuasive. He draws out my pleasure with every touch, pulling my release from me. Another flick against my sensitive clit. I gasp from the pleasure it generates. It’s still not enough.

  “More,” I beg.

  He gives it to me. Soon, I’m writhing beneath him, my body screaming for release. I reach for it, desperate for it. Paddy continues his torment but adds to it by sliding two thick fingers inside me, filling me. The fullness along with the tingling bundle of nerves are too much. My back arches, and my orgasm hits. I cry out.

  Tears of pleasure and joy spill from my eyes. I can’t stop them. They’re overflowing and falling down my temples to soak my hair and the pillow beneath it. Paddy wraps his arms around me, whispering words that don’t make sense in my ear. Finally, they filter through.

  “I love you,” he says over and over.

  Soon, my tears dry. I take in a shuddering breath, pull away, and palm his cheek. “More.”

  His eyes scan my face. Paddy lowers his head and claims my mouth with a searing kiss. He breaks it far too soon and rolls halfway off me. He reaches down and rids himself of his pants. I’m not brave enough to glance in that direction despite my curiosity.

  Before I can blink, Paddy’s mouth is on mine again. His palm covers my breast, kneading it and plucking at the turgid tip. The pleasure that only recently settled after my release quickly rises once more. He covers me with his body. I wrap my arms around him to hold him tightly to me. There’s a firm pressure against my entrance, and I suck in a breath.

  Paddy stops. “Look at me,” he growls.

  My eyes meet his. Love shines from his gaze. Slowly, I relax. He eases further inside, going slow, almost too slow. It’s too much, yet not enough at the same time.

  “Please,” I beg.

  With a single thrust, Paddy buries his length the rest of the way, seating himself fully. He holds himself rigidly still. Every muscle flexes and contracts as though fighting the urge to move. I lift my hips in a tentative motion, and he slides just a bit deeper, hitting a spot inside me that makes me cry out. It’s never been this good.

  “Are you okay?” he murmurs against my lips.

  “Never better.” I sigh.

  Paddy chuckles but smothers it when he begins to move. His cock glides through my wetness. Slowly at first, then gaining speed. He rises up on his forearms, caging me within them, and locks eyes with me. I can’t look away if I tried. He rocks into me, each thrust grinding harder against my clit, the friction increasing.

  Emotion flares between us. My eyes drift close, but I force them open. I don’t want to miss any of this. We’ll never have another first time together. I want to savor every second. Every touch. Every kiss. I want the love shining from his gaze to burn me with its intensity.

  As though sensing how close I am, Paddy reaches between us. He fingers my clit, circling it, teasing the sensitive nub. The pressure builds. The tingling spreads. Then…it bursts. Sparks fly and colors explode. My release hits me with an unexpected speed. His thrusts gain momentum, and sweat beads on his forehead. On mine. Our sweat-slicked skin glides along each other.

  I wrap my legs around Paddy and scream out a wild sound. His groan echoes in my ear. He goes rigid, and hot seed fills me. My pussy clenches, drawing more of him into me, holding his length inside. I can barely draw a breath. At last, he collapses on top of me, his weight heavy and warm. For a brief second, panic rises, but I swallow it back. It’s Paddy. You’re safe.

  He partially rolls to the side like he knows how close I am to going from pure bliss to…not. “Look at me, Anya.”

  My eyes meet his. He doesn’t say anything else. Just takes deep breaths. I follow his lead. In and out, we both breathe, our chests rising and falling in sync. At last, that flutter of fear that reared its head shrinks back into the ether. I doubt it’s gone forever, but at least I have a temporary reprieve from it.

  Paddy brushes my tangled hair off my face. His fingers caress my cheek. My jaw. My neck. “I love you,” he says. “Thank you for trusting me.”

  “Thank you for loving me,” I tell him. “And for showing me true happiness.”

  All my life I’ve looked for it wherever I could find it. Before tonight, it’s been in my flowers. My sewing. Paddy is my happiness now.

  I close the distance between us and curl against him. His arms go around me, holding me close. I’m safe within his embrace. Like you always knew you’d be. My eyes grow heavy, and soon, I’m drifting off to sleep. The small flicker of hope that has existed deep inside me as only embers, flares to brightness. Everything is going to be all right.

  Chapter 41

  Paddy

  * * *

  I woke this morning with Anya wrapped in my arms. We didn’t make love again, but, instead, talked about our lives growing up. The things we’d previously felt left us too vulnerable to share. Like my dyslexia and her mother. About her anger and my fear of my grand-da. We talked about her dream of opening an online boutique and maybe, one day, starting her own clothing line.

  The one thing we didn’t talk about was her time with the Polish. Or the fact that it was her own half-brother who sold her. I’m not going to push her, either. If and when she’s ready to talk about it, I’m here for her.

  After tonight, though, she’ll never have to worry about them again. At least, not about Krzysztof Gornak, anyway. Once again, Maddox worked his fecking magic. Within five days of my call to him, he had an entire identity created and a meeting scheduled. One Davit Khachatryan is allegedly on his way to Midwood to arrange a financial exchange with Krzysztof Gornak. He’s an arms dealer that’s newly arrived to Brooklyn, negotiating a contract with Sevan Petrosyan, head of the Armenian syndicate, looking for a female “friend” to entertain him while in town. If she’s to his liking, he may take her back to Armenia with him.

  Even though the Armenians and Polish are allies, this little tête-à-tête is still being held in neutral territory for the two syndicates. It’s the one thing working to our advantage. This would have been a lot harder had it been arranged for somewhere in Polish territory.

  I make one final inspection of my weapon to ensure everything is in order before climbing into the backseat of the black SUV. Jack and Nathan are already settled in there. Tiernan, one of our soldiers, is behind the wheel. Like Emilio said, going at this alone would be a suicide mission. Although, they’re both still a little pissed I planned this without them.

  “Remember,” I say once seated, “we wait until Gornak realizes I’m a no-show. My guess is he’s going to make some phone calls, at which point, we need to assume that he’ll discover Khachatryan doesn’t exist. We wait until he exits the building before we strike hard and fast. Take out the vehicle and anyone that’s with him. He is mine, though.”

  They both nod.

  “Got it,” Jack confirms.

  Slowly, we make our way through Bay Ridge and cut through Italian territory on our way to Midwood. Once we reach our intended destination, we park and wait. Something I’m not good with. This is for Anya. The reminder is enough to reel my patience in.

  The silence is tense and thick in the vehicle. My body vibrates with energy while my focus is entirely on the back door of the single-story building midway down the alley. I glance at my watch. Five minutes until our scheduled meeting time. I give Gornak another ten after that to give up and another five before he attempts to leave. Of course, this is all speculation. Which means, we have to be prepared for anything.

  Shane and Brandon are in one vehicle at the other end, effectively blocking him in. Several more vehicles filled with soldiers are strategically placed nearby in case we have unexpected visitors. Every single thing that goes down today is going to be by chance, and we need to pivot with any number of contingencies.

  The one thing I won’t deviate from is that before this night is over, Krzysztof Gornak will be put in the ground. It won’t change what happened to Anya, but if I can possibly make one woman’s life easier by eliminating that bastard, then it will have to be enough.

  That buzz of energy grows the longer we sit here and the closer it gets to go-time. My breathing is loud and echoes in the quiet of the vehicle. I’m vaguely aware of Jack and Nathan shifting impatiently next to me outside my tunneled focus.

  There’s a shift in the air. My body goes rigid. Seconds later, the back door of the building is flung open. Gornak steps out, his expression stormy. No doubt enraged at being stood up. Two men follow behind him. Wait. Wait. The first of his companions opens the back door of their vehicle and climbs in.

  It’s time.

  I smack Tiernan’s shoulder, signaling him. “Go! Go!”

  Tires squeal as we race down the alley. From the opposite end, Shane and Brandon approach at full speed.

  Confusion crosses Gornak’s face. His head swivels back and forth, trying to figure out what’s happening. Chaos reigns. He screams and gestures for the man inside the car to get out. We reach them first. Before our SUV even stops, I jump out and open fire. Behind me, either Jack or Nathan curse, but I ignore them.

  Gornak and the third man pull guns from holsters beneath their suit coats and return shots. I dive behind a dumpster before any hit their mark. Shane and Brandon collide with the Polish’s vehicle and then they both tumble out with their guns at the ready.

  We all continue to exchange gunfire. I need to get closer. There’s no way Gornak is getting away. I glance around and catch Jack’s eye.

  “Cover me,” I holler.

  Before he can stop me, I take off running toward where I last saw my target. More gunfire echoes in the air. A cry of pain follows. Approaching footsteps come from behind me. I can only assume it’s Jack. There. I spot Gornak crouched behind two trash barrels. His eyes widen when he sees me. He raises his gun, but before he can get a shot off, I fire.

  The impact of the bullet in his arm throws him off balance, and he stumbles backward. I pan my weapon, keeping an eye out for other enemies, but I have to trust my brothers and our soldiers to have my back. Bloodlust runs through my veins. A part of me wants to draw this out. Prolong this bastard’s agony, but the greater part of me wants to end him immediately. While it would give me great pleasure to take him to Pierce’s underground torture room, it’s not worth it.

  I stand over Gornak, kicking his weapon out of reach. There’s fear in his eyes, but he merely smiles up at me. “I recognize you. You’re the one who married my favorite pet, aren’t you? Anya, I believe was her name. Then again, after a while, they all just become fuck toys.”

  My back goes rigid. “Don’t you dare speak about her that way.”

  He laughs. “Have you tasted that sweet pussy of hers, yet? Or how about that as—”

  Boom.

  A single bullet hole appears in the middle of Gornak’s forehead. His sightless eyes stare up at nothing. His mouth hangs open. I spit on the body and turn. Jack stands nearby. Three other dead bodies, all Polish, litter the ground.

  “We need to go, Paddy,” he says.

  I walk away from the carnage and climb into the waiting SUV. Then, we’re heading back to Bay Ridge.

  It’s late by the time I step through the front door of our house. The lights are all off except for a single one that Anya always keeps burning when she knows I’m going to be home late. Two nights ago, she moved into the master bedroom with me. I head for the spare bathroom and take a quick shower to wash away the night’s events.

  After every raid, I always spend extra time trying to wash the blood that’s not really there off my hands. Tonight is no different. Mostly because I don’t want to taint Anya with Gornak’s. Once I’m satisfied I’m clean, I wrap the towel around my waist and quietly make my way back to our bedroom.

  Normally, I’d head downstairs and play my video game, but not this time. Tonight, I need to hold my wife in my arms. I need to feel her body against me. Smell her sweet scent. To know that she’s here beside me, and I’m never letting her go.

  For a moment, I stare down at her lying in my bed, so innocent-looking, with the faint moonlight filtering through the window shining over her. It gives her an angelic appearance with her blonde hair spilled over the pillow. She mumbles in her sleep and reaches across to my side as though searching for me.

  I quickly dry off and then slide naked beneath the blankets. Anya scoots closer, seeking out my heat. I pull her into my side, and she snuggles deeper against me. Her slender, delicate hand makes its way up to my chest. My heart pounds beneath her touch.

  Only for her.

  Forever for her.

  Epilogue One

  Anya

  * * *

  I’m in my happy place. I tip my head back with a smile and let the sun shine down on my face. Soon, the weather is going to get colder, and I won’t be able to spend much time out here. I breathe in the fresh air and then return to my task.

  As promised, Moira had given me a box of tulip bulbs. For the last couple months, they’ve been stored away until it was prime planting time. I got them out this morning and have spent hours carefully placing each one. I finish packing the dirt over the last of them with a sigh of pleasure. The next several months are going to be endless while I wait for spring to arrive and for these beauties to bloom.

  “I thought you were supposed to be resting,” Paddy’s voice rings out.

  Once again, I tip my head back. This time for my husband to brush his lips across mine. I smile against them. “You know I can’t sit still when I’m on a mission. And today’s mission was to get these bulbs your mother gave me planted.”

  Paddy helps me off the ground. Once standing, I can’t resist threading my fingers through his hair and pulling him in for another kiss. “You taste good. Have you already been sampling the sparkling wine?”

  He gives me a cheeky grin and holds up the picnic basket he’s brought out with him. “And start our celebration without you? Never.”

  My lips quirk, and I shoot him a knowing glance.

  “Fine,” Paddy huffs good-naturedly. “But it was just a little sip.”

  Once a week for the last five months Paddy brings a picnic out to me. We always celebrate our marriage. Although, lately, we’ve also been celebrating something else. He sets the basket on the ground and then kneels at my feet.