“I’m sorry to spring this last minute on you.” Jack says on the other end of the phone. “Are you sure you’re okay with picking Lucia up at the airport?”

  “Of course. It’s no problem.” In fact, I’m more than happy to do it. Finally, another chance to see the woman I haven’t been able to get off my mind since we met six years ago.

  “Thanks, Nathan. I know Rory appreciates it, too, especially with her feeling like shit. It’s one less thing she has to worry about before the wedding next week.”

  “Tell her I’ve got it covered,” I say, closing the front door behind me. “I’m sure Lucia will call her once she gets settled into her hotel.”

  “All right, I have to go. Thanks again.”

  I pocket my phone and slide behind the wheel of the Mercedes. Jack and Paddy have both moved out. When Jack said he was going to propose to Rory, I expected it. Never would I have guessed that a few, short months later, Paddy, too, would be gone. Of course, I don’t think any of us could have seen him and Anya getting married, either.

  Which means I live alone for the first time in my twenty-four years. Can’t say I’m a fan. I’m used to the noise of other people around me, especially having grown up in a house with five kids. But the echoing silence of the empty brownstone only reminds me of how alone I am. Stop feeling sorry for yourself for fuck’s sake.

  I navigate through traffic, until finally making it to JFK. My gaze travels around the parking garage, not only looking for a spot to park, but also remembering what happened the last time I was here. Lucia pressing me against the side of my car and kissing the hell out of me. Pushing me into the backseat. I’d never expected it to turn into something more than just that kiss. Instead, it became a wildfire that ignited and spread, causing both of us to go up in flames.

  Even three years later, the echo of her gasps of pleasure ring in my ears. The scent of sex mixed with the floral fragrance of Lucia’s shampoo as her hair curtained our heads, as though to hide us from the outside world, still hits me sometimes. My fingers grip the steering wheel tight as though they can recall just how soft her skin had been beneath them.

  Lucia’s curves fit within my grasp. The flare of her hips as she rocked against me, taking me deeper inside her. My cock hardens. I shift in the seat and adjust my jeans to minimize the uncomfortable sensation. She’s definitely not going to be happy to see me.

  Why can’t I let it go? She made it clear on more than one occasion that she has no interest in me. I can’t help but think she’s lying though. There is definitely something there. At least there had been six years ago, when we danced at Gio and Francesca’s wedding, and again three years ago, when we’d fucked in the backseat of my car.

  I clearly have some deep seated need to torture myself, being attracted to a woman who denies her own attraction to me. Both Jack and Paddy would give me shit for it if they knew. At last, I park and walk toward the baggage claim and all the arriving passengers. My gaze drifts across the bustling area, dismissing each person who doesn’t possess the long, dark brown hair of the woman I’m waiting for.

  None of them have Lucia’s bright red lips or caramel-colored eyes that always held a bit of reticence. Like she was leery of showing me more than what was visible on the surface. Both times we’d been in each other’s company, I could tell she held back a part of herself.

  Wait. Is that her? I bob side to side trying to find out. Finally, there she is. Lucia drags a suitcase behind her. I stop dead in my tracks, because that’s not the only thing she’s brought with her. At her side, a small hand clasped within hers, is a little boy who can’t be more than two or three. One with bright blue eyes eerily similar to those that stare back at me every day from a mirror. But it’s his reddish hair, nearly the exact shade of my own, the makes my breath stall in my chest. It picks up again with a herculean effort.

  Without losing track of either of them, I force my feet to move. I stride forward, disregarding any passersby. Someone collides with me, cursing, but I ignore them and keep walking. I’m only feet from them when her gaze meets mine. The blood drains from her face. She comes to a complete stop. Her lips move to form my name, only unspoken.

  Lucia jerks her arm. The little boy comes to an abrupt halt as well. He turns to stare up at her. “Mama, why we stop?”

  Mama? The fuck? My eyes drop to the little boy. His head tips back and he meets my gaze. I can’t quit looking at him. I force myself to turn from him and back to Lucia. His mother.

  “Nathan,” she whispers. “What are you doing here? Where’s Rory?”

  “She’s at home in bed. Sick.” I look down again. The boy’s gaze bounces between us, his smile absent. Instead, there’s an unsure expression on his face. As though he can sense the tension in the air.

  “You weren’t supposed to be here,” Lucia says.

  My gaze snaps back to her. Feelings I can’t seem to control rush over me. Confusion. Lust. Hope. Anger. “Why wasn’t I supposed to be, Lucia? So I didn’t find out about him? Were you hoping to avoid me the entire time you were here? How long did you expect to continue keeping this—him—a secret? Were you ever going to tell me?” I can’t stop the questions from erupting like rapid-fire gunshots.

  She flinches with each one. The little boy’s lip trembles. I try holding back my emotions. This isn’t the time or place.

  “I’m sorry,” Lucia says softly. Then she squats down, and speaks to her—my—son. She brushes the red hair off his forehead and smiles at him. “Shhh, Enzo. It’s okay. This is mama’s…friend, Nathan. Can you say hello?”

  Eyes the same color as mine—as Da’s—stare up at me shyly. There’s an understandable reticence to him—to Enzo. I’m a stranger who just yelled at his mother. I take a deep breath and slowly blow it out. I smile, because I don’t want him to be afraid of me. Like Lucia, I crouch down so I’m not looming. “Hi, Enzo.”

  He scoots closer to her, as though trying to hide, and puts two fingers in his mouth. There’s no reply to my greeting. He merely stares at me with a cautious expression. I want to reach out and comfort him, but no doubt that will only make things worse. Instead, I slowly rise. Lucia glances up at me before she too stands.

  We stare at each other for another moment. Then, her expression shifts—hardens—and her shoulders straighten.

  “I’m afraid you’re mistaken in this assumption of yours. Now, if you don’t mind, I need to get our other bags and then get my son into bed. It’s been a long day.” With that, she picks Enzo up and walks away, lugging the suitcase behind her.

  I can only stare after her while my brain processes her words. Mistaken? Not a chance. In seconds, I catch up to them.

  “Give me your bag,” I tell her, reaching for it.

  She glances over and hesitates.

  “Lucia,” I growl.

  Finally, she complies and passes the handle to me. Our hands brush. The same electric current that’s occurred every time we’ve touched sparks again. Her eyes widen. Had she felt it as well? Her gaze darts to mine, as does her son’s, like he can sense the tension between us. I try to breathe out my emotions, but they keep tangling around each other.

  We reach the carousel and she stands slightly behind me, speaking softly to Enzo, who lays his head on her shoulder and rubs his eyes sleepily. Far too slowly her bag and the carseat arrive. I give her back the smaller suitcase and take the rest. We continue in silence all the way to my car. Lucia pauses outside of it. Is she remembering what happened the last time we were in this vehicle?

  I put her suitcases in the trunk while she secures the car seat and gets Enzo settled into it. Instead of moving to the front, she climbs in next to him. So much for that. I get behind the wheel and carefully make my way out of the garage.

  “Where are you staying?” I ask, adjusting the rearview mirror so I have the perfect view of Lucia.

  “At the McCarren Hotel in Williamsburg.”

  I don’t spend a lot of time in Italian territory, so I enter the information into my GPS. I adjust the mirror again so they’re both in my sight. My eyes continuously drift to Enzo. I don’t believe he’s not mine. Not after her initial reaction to seeing me. There had been fear in her eyes.

  Jesus, I have a son.

  My gaze lands on Lucia and, for a second, I could almost hate her for keeping him from me.

  Chapter 5

  Lucia

  * * *

  No matter how hard I try to resist, my gaze keeps darting up to catch glimpses of Nathan. Despite the darkened vehicle, his face is illuminated by the passing overhead streetlights and the headlights of oncoming traffic. More often than not, our eyes meet, and I quickly look down to check on Enzo, who’s finally fallen asleep. I brush my fingers through the baby-fine hair so similar in color to his father’s.

  How could everything have gone so wrong? Nathan hasn’t spoken since we got in the car, but his anger is still a low vibration that hovers around him, pulsing into me with each glance we share in the mirror. Back at the airport I’d wanted to apologize for keeping his son from him, but then panic set in. I hadn’t meant to lie, but fear had taken over. Not just for myself, but that Nathan will take—or try to take—Enzo away from me. The drive to the hotel is painfully silent, broken only by the robotic voice giving periodic directions to our destination. I glance up, and yet again, Nathan’s gaze meets mine. When I’d first spotted him again after all these years, my heart leaped in my chest and my pulse raced. The world around us had disappeared like we were in a bubble. Sights were blurred and sounds were muffled. It had been only Nathan and me, just like during our dance at Gio and Francesca’s wedding. Until a small voice brought me back to reality.

  At last, the hotel comes into view. Nathan parks in front and exits the vehicle while I climb out, circle around, and carefully lift my son in order not to wake him. A bellman steps outside with a warm greeting. If I expect Nathan to drop me off and leave, I’m clearly mistaken, because he passes the keys to a second man—a valet—who approaches us. He unhooks the carseat and grabs both bags from the trunk, once again handing me the smaller one. I sigh and let the bellman open the door of the hotel for me. Nathan is on my heels.

  He waits while I get checked in, his gaze penetrating, and then follows me to the elevator, luggage in tow. The silence that neither of us seems inclined to break only grows thicker and more tense. We reach my room and I pause outside of it, shifting Enzo against my shoulder. My little boy is getting big. I’m not sure how much longer I’ll be able to carry him like this.

  “Thank you for picking us up,” I tell Nathan, pausing for a moment before continuing. “It was nice seeing you again.”

  His gaze penetrates right through me. “I don’t know what you’re playing at, but this isn’t finished between us.”

  I bristle at the warning in his tone. I’ve never been one to handle threats well. They do nothing but get my back up. Except this isn’t a conversation I’m going to have in the middle of a hotel hallway, this late at night, while holding my sleeping son.

  “I’m not playing at anything. And we never began in the first place, so there is nothing to finish. Now, if you’ll excuse me, I need to put my son to bed.Goodnight, Nathan,” I say firmly, needing him to leave.

  I open the door and turn back to grab my things.

  His jaw tightens a fraction. “I’ve got it. Go get Enzo settled.”

  I don’t want his peppered citrus scent to invade my space, but the stubborn tilt of his head warns me not to argue. Since something tells me I’m going to need my energy for a much bigger fight, I do as he says and turn on the light, walk inside, and carry my son across the room. I turn down the covers and carefully lay him down before tugging off his shoes, setting them to the side, and pulling the blankets up to his chin. His breathing remains even and his eyes stay closed. Even in sleep, the resemblance between him and his father is stark. I stare at him a moment longer before returning my gaze to Nathan.

  He’s set the largest suitcase on the luggage rack, the other on the floor beside it, and the carseat between the bed and the wall. He glances at me, then at Enzo, and heads toward the door. He pauses with it open and glances over his shoulder. “We will talk soon, Lucia” It’s a warning.

  As soon as the lock clicks, I rush over and turn the secondary bolt. I sag against the barrier with a heavy sigh and tears threaten. As does the guilt. No sooner does my racing heart return to its normal speed than my phone rings causing it to jump again. I rise up and quickly move to answer it before it can wake up Enzo.

  “Hello?”

  “Hey, it’s me,” Rory says, her voice gravelly with congestion. “I’m so sorry I wasn’t able to pick you up. Did Nathan find you? Are you at your hotel yet?”

  I collapse, exhausted, onto the desk chair. “Yes, he found me. We just got to our room.”

  “How is my little nephew? Did he do okay on the flight?” From the time Enzo could talk, she’s been “Auntie Rory”, despite the fact in reality, they’re second cousins. I push back the perpetual guilt I always feel. Not even she knows who Enzo’s father is. I’d never force her to keep that kind of secret from Jack.

  “He was a perfect angel, of course. The older woman seated next to us kept him entertained. Or maybe there was mutual entertaining going on. He fell asleep before we even made it to the hotel,” I say with a smile. “What about you? Nathan said you were sick.”

  “It’s just a horrible cough with a mild fever. I’m starting to feel better, though, which means that by tomorrow or the next day at the latest, I should be well enough to come see you two. I’ve missed you so much. I also can’t wait to finally meet Enzo in person.”

  “I’ve missed you, too,” I admit, clearing my throat before I get too choked up. “Enzo has been talking for days about meeting Auntie Rory.”

  “Dang it, I wish I could have been there to pick you up. Tomorrow, though,” she says firmly as though willing it to be. “I’m going to let you go so we all can get some rest tonight. I don’t think I can wait to come see you.”

  I can’t help but smile. She’s back to being the impatient Rory I’d known before she spent three years living in hell with Alessandro. No matter how hard he tried, he hadn’t been able to break her spirit completely. Even though it had seemed like it at the time.

  “I just want you to feel better. Enzo and I will be here when you are. In the meantime, call me if you need anything.”

  “I will,” Rory says. “Goodnight.”

  “Night.”

  I set my phone on the desk and rise from the chair, casting a glance over my shoulder at my still sleeping son. As quietly as I can, I open my suitcase, rifle through it to grab my bag of toiletries and pajamas, and head into the bathroom, keeping the door slightly ajar in case Enzo wakes up. I take a quick shower, washing away all the travel grime, and do my best to not think about Nathan while I’m in there.

  Once I’m dressed and my damp hair is braided, I climb into bed, careful not to jostle my son, and stare up at the ceiling. His soft snores comfort me as my thoughts unwillingly drift to his father. Nathan has gotten even more handsome with age. A feat I didn’t think possible. There are no signs of that eighteen-year-old I first met six years ago. He’s changed even in the three years since that day in the backseat of his car. His shoulders are broader. His jaw chiseled enough to cut glass. It’s his eyes, though, that showcase the differences. There’s a hardness in their blue depths that hadn’t been present before. Like he’s seen—and done—things that have changed him.

  Those same changes occurred in Michele. Right before he’d been killed. I turn my head and gaze at my son. My heart hardens with determination. I will never allow that hardness to enter Enzo’s eyes. The secrets I’ve kept since finding out I was pregnant have been to protect him.

  Forcing myself to try and get some rest, I turn and curl my body protectively around him. No matter what Nathan says or does, that won’t change. I’ll continue to do whatever I have to, to protect my son. Even if that means losing everyone else I care about.

  Chapter 6

  Nathan

  * * *

  I’m awake early. Awake? Hell, I didn’t actually sleep at all last night.

  I have a son.

  One that Lucia has kept from me for three years. The anger I’ve been trying to keep banked surges forward again. I’ve lost all this time with him. For what? Is she punishing me for something?

  The burning sensation curdles inside my chest and spreads heat through my body. I sit on the edge of my bed with my fisted hands hanging between my legs. I clench and unclench them, trying to control my rage. I need someone to talk to, but I’m not sure who.

  I haven’t had enough sleep or coffee to come up with a plan, so I throw on a pair of shorts and my running shoes, put in my ear buds with the music cranked up, and head out the front door. When my best friend, Eoin, had been killed in a raid, I’d taken up running. He’d always tried getting me to go out with him, and every time I’d come up with some excuse why I couldn’t. I’m not sure if starting after he’s gone is my way of punishing myself for not doing a better job of protecting him or not.

  Five, sweaty miles later, I drag myself up my front steps and into the brownstone before heading straight to my room. Once I toe off my shoes and kick them through the open closet door, I strip out of my shorts and get in the shower. Throughout my entire run, my brain had been empty of everything but the music slamming into my ears. It’s the only time my thoughts are blank. But standing under the cold, flowing water they rush back in. Each and everyone of them are about Lucia, Enzo, and what I’m going to do about them.

  There’s probably only one person equipped to help me deal with the situation. Someone level-headed, but also emotional enough to make me understand why Lucia would keep my son from me. I quickly dress, jog down the stairs, and out to my car. The floral fragrance of Lucia’s shampoo still lingers in the interior. Before, it had taken over a week for it to dissipate entirely. I only hope it doesn’t take as long this time.