“Well, we weren’t, and now you just went and screwed everything up. Thanks a lot, Cal,” I snap at my best friend.

  “Whoa, hold the phone. I didn’t do this to you, you did this to you. You gotta own your shit! First you tried to turn it around on Delilah, and now you’re trying to turn it on me. How about you grow a pair and look at who really is to blame here. This is all on you, bro,” Calvin says calmly, even though I can see in his eyes that he is one pissed off motherfucker. And it takes a lot to tick Calvin off. Shit, I am a dick. “I’ll give you some time to get your shit together before I give you a call,” he said evenly, turned, and headed down the hall toward the door.

  I grind my teeth together as I watch Calvin leave. Damn him! Why does he always have to call me out on my shit? Can’t he just let me blame everyone but myself for once? I’m such an ass. I just lost the one woman that I’m pretty sure I’m in love with and pissed off my best friend, all in a matter of fifteen minutes. Wow, great job douchebag! I have to be the biggest jackass on this planet. How the hell am I supposed to fix this? I know Calvin will forgive me, but Delilah? I’m not so sure.

  Chapter Ten

  Delilah

  My hair smells and I haven’t gotten out of bed in three days. That’s a lie, I got out of bed to go to the bathroom, but that was it. Lying here now, with my hair covering my face, I can smell it and it doesn’t smell good. My room is dark even though it’s the middle of the afternoon because I have all of the blinds closed. This is my pit of despair, and I never plan on coming out. But, of course, once again, shit doesn’t go my way. My bedroom door is thrown open, and an infuriated Charlotte Fisher is standing in the doorway, backlit by the light from the rest of my apartment.

  “What the hell is going on here?” she squawks.

  I hiss at her like the vampire I’m trying to become and pull the covers up over my head. I hear her stomp toward me. Knowing that she is going to try to rip them away, I tighten my hold and wait for the attack. Boom! She strikes – hard and fast – grabbing the covers and yanking them completely off me. She tosses them to the floor and plants her fists on her hips.

  “Why are you holed away in your bedroom, and why is your phone off?” Charlie asks in the tone she gets when she is determined to get an answer, no matter what.

  “Go away, I want to be alone,” I grumble and shove my head under my pillow.

  “No way, Elvira, not gonna happen. You might as well tell me what’s going on. Are you sick?” she asks.

  “No,” I grunt from under my pillow.

  “Dying?”

  “I wish,” I mutter quietly, hoping it was too low to hear.

  “I heard that!” Charlie snapped.

  Dammit.

  Charlie sits on the bed, making me roll slightly toward her. Her hand comes down to rest on my arm. “Whatever it is, LaLa, you know you can tell me,” she says softly.

  “I know. I’m... I just… it hurts,” I whisper brokenly, my other arm flung across my face.

  “This has to do with Nico, then?”

  “And Nick.”

  “Nick? What does he have to do with it?” Charlie asks, confused.

  I lift my head up so that the pillow falls away. I look at Charlie through my already teary eyes. “Nico is Nick, Nick is Nico!” I say sounding like Ace Ventura when he finds out that Finkle is Einhorn and Einhorn is Finkle.

  “Shut the fuck up! Are you serious?” Charlie gasps and covers her mouth and nose with her hands.

  I nod. “And he knew I was LaLa for weeks and never told me. I just talked to him that morning about Nico, telling him that I thought I was falling in love with him, and he still didn’t say a word…” I blab out almost hysterically.

  “How did you find out then?”

  “His friend, Calvin. You know, the one that owns Club M? He came into the office on Monday and called Nick, Nico, in front of me,” I say, my lip curling up in disgust at just the thought of that bastard’s guilty face when Calvin spilled the beans.

  “Wait, so you’ve been in here since Monday?” Charlie asks slowly.

  I shrug sheepishly.

  “LaLa! It’s Thursday!” my best friend shrieks and jumps to her feet. “No wonder you fucking stink! Get up right now and get into the shower. Then we are going to get you something to eat…fucking men,” she snarls the last part as she leaves the room.

  I sigh heavily as I pull myself up into a sitting position. I sit there for a moment before heaving myself out of the bed and into the bathroom. I swear I spent an hour in the shower just washing my hair. I’m feeling much better by the time I get out. I get dressed in an old baggy t-shirt and sweatpants, and then shuffle out into the living room where I find Charlie looking through my take-out menus.

  “What do you want to eat?” Charlie asks, looking up from the menus.

  “Everything and lots of chocolate,” I mumble.

  “How about pizza?”

  The tears hit me hard and fast. I drop my face into my hands to try to muffle my uncontrollable sobs.

  “What? What happened?” Charlie asks frantically as she rushes over to me. “Did you stub your toe?”

  “No, it’s just…it’s just that the last time I had pizza… it was with Nick in his office,” I wail.

  “Oh, for fuck’s sake, Delilah!” Charlie says in exasperation. “You need to get over that piece of shit and stop having a pity party. You deserve better than him and you know it!”

  I collect myself as best as I can and give Charlie a jerky nod. “Yeah, okay, you’re right.”

  “Okay, can I order the pizza now? What kind do you want?”

  I wave a dismissive hand. “Whatever, I don’t care, just order something.”

  “Ugh! I hate depressed LaLa!” Charlie huffs and pulls out her cell phone.

  While Charlie orders food, I go into my kitchen and turn my phone back on. It is sitting on the counter, shut off. The voicemail button shows that I have twenty messages. Most likely, more than half are from Charlie. I hope that Nick hasn’t called. I really can’t handle even hearing his voice right now. I go through the messages and I am right about most of them being from Charlie. A couple of them are from my dad, one from Carmella, and thankfully, none from Nick. Asshole. Don’t get me wrong, I’m not expecting him to call, and I really don’t want him to, but if he did, it would at least tell me that he cares, even if it’s just a little bit. But there’s not even a text. Nothing. Apparently, that’s what I mean to him. Nothing. I should have known that he is a selfish fucking bastard.

  After Charlie and I scarf down a whole pizza, we talk some more about what happened. Charlie calls in a couple of favors to get me an interview at another law firm on Monday. It’s good to have a best friend who knows people.

  “Don’t worry, LaLa, you’re strong. You just have to pick yourself up, dust yourself off, and show that fuckhead that he can’t bring you down,” Charlie says firmly. “That’s the best revenge. Well, that, and maybe an itty bitty rumor about his itty bitty man parts.” She chuckles and winks at me.

  There she goes again, always knowing the right thing to say to me. I take a deep breath and nod. “Yeah, you’re right… about the picking myself up part!” I sigh. I know she’s right, but it’s really hard to not be hurt and disappointed and betrayed. “I’m sure I’ll feel better as time goes on.”

  “You will.”

  “Thanks, Charlie. I love you.”

  “Love you, too, LaLa.” Charlie smiles and gives me a much-needed hug.

  ♫♩♫♩♫♩♫

  Nick

  What a fucking mess. I’m talking about everything - my office, my hair, even my clothes. Files, papers, and just what-the-fuck-ever is piled up all over my desk. This is usually the stuff that Delilah keeps organized and neatly filed. I didn’t even bother putting anything in my hair this morning, so it’s doing whatever the hell it wants. I keep raking my hand through it because it keeps falling down into my eyes, so that’s not helping it any. My shirt and pants are wrinkled because I ended up sleeping here last night; I was trying to catch up on some things and ended up falling asleep in my chair, not waking up until this morning at 8:00 am. I couldn’t bother running home to shower and change.

  This whole week has been a nightmare. I lost Delilah on Monday, and the work has been piling up since then. I lost a major case on Tuesday because I wasn’t as prepared as I should have been. I got into a fender bender on Wednesday with my McLaren, so now my car is in the shop and I’m stuck with a piece of shit rent-a-car for a week or two. Not to mention the fact that it is going to cost me tens of thousands to fix.

  It’s now Thursday and I’m about ready to lose my fucking mind. My heart has been aching since Delilah left and I just don’t know what to do about it. I’ve never been in this position before. No woman, since my mother, has made my heart ache, and I don’t like it one fucking bit. To tell you the truth, I haven’t let one get close enough to find out. I usually drop them before I develop any feelings whatsoever - even faster if they start feeling something.

  I called Calvin yesterday and apologized, so we’re cool again, but I have yet to call Delilah. I don’t know what to say to her, and I know “sorry” isn’t going to cut it. I absolutely have to do something soon, though, because I can’t have my office looking like this any longer. The disorganization and disarray is affecting every aspect of my life. I need to either call Delilah to beg her to come back, or try to hire someone else; that thought, though, just turns my stomach.

  I’m sitting at my desk with my head in my hands when there is a knock on my door. I lift my head wearily to see Carmella standing in the doorway, a cup of coffee in her hand. She gives me a warm smile and starts forward.

  “I thought you could use this,” she says sweetly and extends the coffee to me.

  I take it from her and give her a tight smile. “Thank you, Carmella.”

  “No offense, hon, but this place looks like shit and so do you,” Carmella snorts as she looks around my office.

  I grunt in agreement and take a sip of the coffee.

  “Have you called Delilah?” she asks, her eyes coming back to meet mine.

  I shake my head. “No.”

  “And why the hell not?” she asks sharply, shoving her hands on her hips.

  I sigh heavily and lean back in my chair. “I don’t know. She probably hates me and doesn’t want to talk to me anyway.”

  “Oh, bullshit, Nick. You are just being stubborn. You may not be used to having to chase after a woman, but guess what buddy, Delilah is not going to make the first move. That has to be you,” Carmella says, giving me a pointed look.

  I groan and scrub my hand over my scruffy jaw, which definitely needs a trim. “I don’t know what to say to her. I screwed up, I hurt her, and I don’t know what to say or do to fix it.”

  “Why don’t you go over to her place? I’m sure once you see her you’ll know what to say,” she says.

  “I don’t know…” I hedge. I’m not even sure what I want at the moment. Part of me wants to get Delilah back, but then the other part thinks I should move on and forget about her.

  “She’s not going to wait forever. She’s going to move on, get another job, another boyfriend…once her heart heals, you will have less of a chance of getting her back,” Carmella says seriously then starts for the door. Another boyfriend? Was I her boyfriend? And how the hell did Carmella know about Delilah and me?

  As soon as Carmella leaves and is out of sight, I decide it’s time for a major temper tantrum. I shove out of my chair so hard that it tips backward and crashes to the floor. I chuck the cup of coffee Carmella just gave me at the window that overlooks Delilah’s desk. Of course, it explodes all over the window and splashes back onto the carpet. I swipe an arm across my desk, sending papers and files all over the fucking place. I yell wordlessly in aggravation as I turn and punch a hole in the wall behind my desk.

  “Motherfucker!” I cry and shake my hand out. Damn it, that hurt, and now I have to have someone come fix the hole in the wall. Nice job, dumbass!

  You know what? Fuck Delilah! I already apologized to her. I shouldn’t have to do it a million times. I don’t know what she is so mad about in the first place. So what if I didn’t tell her! She didn’t have to make it a bigger deal than it really is! I can find someone else to do her job, and have a ton of women who would chop off their own leg to spend one night with me. So guess what Delilah? You can suck my big fat cock!

  ♫♩♫♩♫♩♫

  More Nick…

  I walk into Club M on Saturday completely set on hooking up with someone, get out my frustrations, and get over Delilah. My mask tonight is a navy blue and very simple. I also decided to go for a more casual feel, with a nice blue and white striped button down and dark blue jeans. I see Calvin as I walk in and give him a nod. He raises a hand in greeting before going back to typing on his messenger. I head straight to the bar and grab my usual. I scan the crowd as I sip my drink. There are a couple of possibilities for me tonight. My gaze lands on a fiery red head down the bar. Hmm, I haven’t had a red head in a while. She is wearing a gold mask to match her outfit, which consists of black leather looking leggings and a metallic gold shirt that has no back to it other than one thin strap holding it together.

  I get the bartender to get me her number, and then the flirting begins. I do my usual “I can see you but you can’t see me” spiel to determine if I want it to go any further. She seems receptive and curious. No witty banter like you know who, but that’s not what I am looking for tonight. I just need a wham bam thank you ma’am. So, I reveal myself and ask her to dance. She was an okay dancer, nothing special, not like Delilah. Fuck! Stop thinking about her!

  Anyway, after a few dances, I suggest going up to my VIP room. Red Apple #331 – her God-awful nickname – agrees. I take her hand and lead her up to my VIP room. As soon as I walk into the room, I’m slammed with memories of LaLa – Delilah – damn it! First off, Let’s Get It On is playing. The same song that was playing the first time I brought Delilah here. I’m going to have to talk to Calvin about his song selection. Secondly, the room actually smells like her. Did I not change the sheets the last time we were here? Maybe it’s just in my head.

  I’m so caught up in my thoughts that I don’t even notice that Big Red - the name I dub her - has turned around in front of me. She grabs my face and kisses me. Well, it’s more like she’s trying to eat my face. Her hands are all over me, trying to rip me out of my clothes. Jesus Christ, I brought a wild animal to my room! I tear my mouth away from hers but she latches onto my neck instead. Nothing she is doing is in any way pleasurable. If I’m going to be honest, it’s downright turning me off. What was I thinking bringing another woman up here? To a room that has become more than just a place for me to screw a bunch of different women. It’s become our room - LaLa’s and mine - together. Goddamnit! I try pushing at the crazed woman who is now trying to get her hands down my pants, but she doesn’t seem to want to budge.

  “For fuck’s sake! Just stop!” I shout and tear her hands off me and take a few steps back from her.

  “What the hell? I thought we’re not supposed to talk?” she snips.

  “Yeah, well, you obviously don’t know how to take a hint when I’m trying to push you back,” I snap in return.

  “Because I thought the whole point of coming up here was to fuck. So why would you be pushing me away?” She huffs and crosses her arms over her chest.

  “I’ve changed my mind, alright? Can you just leave?” I sigh and drop down to the edge of the bed.

  “Are you for real?” Red snaps angrily.

  I bring my eyes up to meet hers; I know how they look, too - cold and hard. Big Red shrinks back slightly.

  “I swear, if you make me get up to throw you out, you are not going to like it,” I growl.

  Lucky for her, she sees how serious I am and races out. I drop my head into my hands and groan. This is so stupid. What the hell has gotten into me? I should have been able to bang that chick, no problem. Damn Delilah, it’s all her fault. She’s ruined all other women for me.

  “You know, I’ve heard of one minute men, but I’ve never actually met one before,” A sarcastic voice says from the doorway, making my head fly up to see who it is.

  A blonde woman walks in, her mask a vibrant purple. She looks seriously familiar but I just can’t place her. She shuts and locks the door behind her. I straighten up, not knowing what she wants. She starts toward me in a very purposeful manner. There is nothing sexual about it, but she definitely looks like she is on a mission. She stops a few feet in front of me and pulls her mask off. I suck in a sharp breath. Aw, shit! I’m in so much trouble!

  “Hello, Nick,” purrs Delilah’s best friend, Charlie, with a very hard “n” and “k.”

  I gape at her for a moment before I can even think of anything to say. “Wha…how did you get in here?” I ask, taking my mask off since she knows who I am.

  “Please, I just followed you up and waited for the Red Baron to leave,” Charlie snorted.

  “Nothing happened with her, I swear!” I exclaim, standing up and taking a step in her direction.

  “Mmm hmm, that’s why her lipstick is all over your mouth and neck,” Charlie says dryly, picking at her fingernails.

  “I…no…wait! She attacked me!” I stammer and scrub my mouth with the sleeve of my shirt.

  Charlie gives me a bored look. “Look, Romeo, I don’t really give a shit about your sex life. What I do give a shit about, is that your hurt my best friend,” she says as she resolutely walks toward me.

  I back up as she advances on me. The backs of my knees hit the bed and I’m forced to sit. Charlie stops in front of me and pokes me hard in the chest.

  “I don’t like when guys like you think they can walk all over my friend and get away with it,” Charlie growls.

  “Charlie, I…” I start, but she cuts me off.