“I don’t want to go,” he said with a heavy sigh once he was finished. “This feels wrong.”

  “You have to. But you’re welcome to come back as soon as you follow your own advice.”

  He gave me a sad look as he finished buttoning his shirt and leaned down to press a quick kiss to my lips. I waited until the sound of my door closing hit my ears, then I rushed over and threw the lock back into place.

  I leaned against the door just like I had only an hour ago, only this time—I smiled.

  14

  Brian

  It figured. The first time I ever really made love to a woman and I was immediately thrown out of her house.

  Just my luck. My shitty, shitty luck.

  I raised my hand and waited for a cab to pull over, sliding into the back and giving the driver my address before running my hand through my hair.

  I briefly entertained the thought of going back to work, but there was no way I’d get anything done. I’d spend the entire day trying to sort out my feelings about Mallory. Trying to determine what I was sure of and what was just a product of the amazing sex.

  My cell rang and I dug it out of my pocket, growling a little when I saw the name on the screen. I knew if I didn’t answer I’d have a shitload of angry voicemails later. Might as well get it over with. I swiped to accept and pressed the phone to my ear.

  “If you’re calling to ask me to rehire your shithead son, let me save you some time and just say no.”

  “Nice to speak to you, too,” Christine said dryly. “I’m doing good, thanks for asking.”

  “Well, I’m not. All thanks to my precious nephew.”

  “Yeah, he called and told me what went down. Or at least his version. Figured I’d call and compare it to yours.”

  I glanced up at the cab driver and hesitated for a split second before deciding I really didn’t give a fuck. I launched into the full story, only sparing the details that directly related to sex. My sister and I had always been close, but not that close.

  Christine laughed on the end of the line when I was finished.

  “She seriously kicked you out?”

  “Not even ten minutes ago.” I glanced up and saw the cab driver raise an eyebrow as his lips twitched. “Say a single fucking word and you can kiss your tip goodbye.”

  Since we were sitting at a stoplight, he had a chance to mime locking his mouth with a key. I rolled my eyes as Christine incredulously said, “What?”

  “I’m in a cab. So what am I supposed to do?”

  “I think she was pretty clear with the instructions, B. How do you feel about her?”

  “It’s too soon to say,” I muttered, but the words felt wrong.

  “She seems to disagree.”

  “She’s young. Naive. She doesn’t know—”

  “Whoa. Before you continue, ask yourself if you would say these things in front of her.”

  I frowned, not following her line of thought.

  “You mean would I call her naive to her face?”

  “Yeah.”

  “No.”

  “Because she isn’t really naive or because you don’t want to hurt her?”

  Both. “The latter.”

  There was a long pause before she laughed again. “You’re such a bad liar. You always were.”

  With a heavy sigh, I settled back against the seat and closed my eyes. I could tell Christine was waiting for a comeback, but I didn’t have it in me to argue.

  “Do you remember when we used to go to yard sales with Mom? When I’d buy every book I could find and you banked your money for that piano?” I waited for her hum of confirmation before I said, “I told her about that. She asked how I got into publishing. She even asked about you. Asked if you still play.”

  “Where are you going with this?”

  “She wants to know me. What if I disappoint her?” I asked quietly. “What if dating an older man isn’t all it’s cracked up to be and she gets bored and moves on?”

  Christine sighed heavily and I could just picture her head shaking.

  “Welcome to the wonderful world of love, Brian. It’s scary as hell, and I hate to break it you to, but those fears are never going to go away.”

  “How the fuck do you deal with it?”

  “Trust. Sometimes vodka, but that’s a personal preference.”

  We both laughed, but Christine sobered up quickly. “Seriously, though. Do what she told you. Follow your heart... and then bring that girl over so I can meet her.”

  “What makes you think I’m—”

  “Because I know you. And it sounds to me like she does as well.”

  Damn it, she was right. They both were. Mallory knew it, too, if the smile on her face as she threw me out was any indication.

  “Thanks, Christine,” I said seriously, then added, “And I’m sorry about Jeremy, but I’m not hiring him ever again.”

  “Understood. Good luck.”

  I thanked her one more time and promised to call her soon before hanging up and sliding the phone back into my pocket. The cab was rapidly approaching my block, so I dug my wallet out and prepared myself at the door.

  The driver had heeded my warning and said nothing at all, so I slipped a hundred-dollar bill through the middle and said, “Keep the change.”

  But when I turned to exit the car, he pressed the button to lock all the doors.

  “What the fu—”

  “You tip well, so I give you this advice,” he said in a thick accent I couldn’t identify. He flipped down the visor and pointed to a picture clipped there. “This is my beloved, you see? She and I, we have been married for thirteen years.”

  His eyebrows were raised expectantly so I said, “Congratulations?”

  “Thank you. She’s younger than me, yes? Too young, her father said. But she didn’t care because I tell her and I show her how I feel all the time and she gives to me in return. That is why she married me and why I do not fear her leaving. You must show her you love her.”

  “Show her,” I repeated slowly, an idea beginning to form in my mind. “And you seriously don’t worry about losing her?”

  His hand clasped into a fist and went over his heart. “Never. Even in death, our spirits will find each other.”

  It was a weirdly intense conversation to have with a cab driver, but it did spawn a thought in my head that I couldn’t shake. I opened my wallet and pulled out two more crisp hundreds, shoving them both through the divider.

  “Change of plans. I need to go to Fifth Avenue and then back to where you picked me up.”

  “That’s my man! Yes!” he cheered. He let out a loud whoop as he pulled away from the curb and I wondered if I’d be able to gather the nerve to go through with this.

  Somewhere along the way, my great idea started feeling like the wrong move.

  No. That was wrong. I could identify the exact moment when it started to go south. It was when the driver pulled up to the jewelry store and spent ten minutes arguing that he should come inside with me because he had a sixth sense about women and jewelry.

  Yeah, that was definitely when it started to feel like a bad fucking idea.

  Yet something still dragged me into that damn store and while a number of employees tried to swindle me to different sections, my eyes locked on the perfect item almost as soon as I entered. In a daze, I made the extravagant purchase and watched them bag it up while they tried and failed to pester me about the lucky girl who’d be receiving it.

  Now the box was burning a hole in my coat pocket. That was the force that was driving me back up the stairs to her apartment while my stomach churned.

  I knocked on her door, wondering if I had been wrong. Could this really be love when I felt so sick?

  The door opened and she smiled widely as she whispered, “You’re back.”

  That’s when it hit me. The startling realization that it wasn’t the gift or doubt or her that was making me feel sick.

  It was the possibility of rejection.

  Shit. It’d been a long while since I felt such paralyzing fear. I had completely forgotten what it was like.

  “Yeah. I’m back.”

  She stepped back to let me in and the way she bit her lip in excitement had me feeling a hell of a lot better. The box shifted in my inner pocket as I moved, reminding me of why I was here.

  “Do you want something to—”

  “I love you.”

  The hand that was pointed at the refrigerator—presumably to offer me a drink—dropped and so did her jaw. The dumbstruck look only lasted a moment before an ecstatic smile lit up her face, but it turned into a frown when I held up my hand when she moved in for a hug.

  “I’m not done,” I said, clearing my throat and trying not to laugh when she looked at me like I had gone insane. “I love you, Mallory. It goes against all logic and reason but I do. I fell in love for the first time so fucking fast that it terrifies the shit out of me.”

  “You’re not the only one, you know. I’m afraid, too.”

  “Yeah?”

  “Of course. Who wouldn’t be? I mean, the nature of love relies upon opening yourself up to vulnerability and trusting another person completely not to break that trust. But the same thing that makes it so frightening is what makes it so beautiful.”

  I stared at her for a long moment before I realized my mouth was hanging open. I snapped it shut and ran a hand through my hair, laughing a little as I said, “You have a much better understanding of love than I do. Or... I guess I should say than I did.”

  “And now?”

  “And now... I want that. And I do trust you, but I was wondering if you’d be willing to do something extra for me.”

  “Anything.”

  She said the word with so much conviction that nearly all of the nervousness I felt went away. I pulled the box out of my jacket and held it between my hands, looking up to see her smiling with bewilderment.

  “I want you to wear this,” I said before I opened the lid of the box the necklace was in. “I want you to wear it all the time.”

  She stepped forward to get a closer look at the pendant and her eyes widened.

  “Is that a—”

  “Ring? Yes. An engagement ring, if you want to be specific.” I paused to take the necklace out, dangling it in the air for her inspection while I tossed the box on her couch. “I’m not ready to get married or even engaged yet, but I want you to wear this around your neck until we’re both ready to move it to your finger.”

  She was watching the ring swing back and forth like a pendulum and a jolt of fear raced up my spine. My hand wavered as I softly added, “Feel free to tell me if that’s completely insane.”

  “No! I... I love it. The ring and the necklace and the whole idea. I just didn’t expect it.”

  Her fingers reached up to stop the ring and she smiled as she looked closely at it. Her eyes moved up to mine as she swept her hair to the side and turned around, the invitation obvious. Once I fastened the clasp, I gripped her shoulder and spun her around.

  “Beautiful.”

  She was still looking down at the ring when she nodded in agreement, so I touched her cheek to capture her attention. I didn’t need to speak to explain that I was referring to her. The blush on her cheeks confirmed that she already knew.

  All that was left was to seal it with a kiss. Her arms wrapped around my neck and mine around her back. Nothing could ruin this moment.

  Her pupils were dilated when I pulled away and she trailed a finger down my chest as she huskily asked, “You brought more condoms, right?”

  Shitty, shitty luck.

  15

  Mallory

  Years later…

  I twisted the rods to open the blinds and smiled at the sight of the city while I stepped back and eased myself up to sit on the edge of the desk.

  Scratch that. The edge made my ass sore. I scooted back further, sighing with relief and leaning back on my palms while my feet dangled in the air. I kicked them absentmindedly as I took in the skyline.

  New York. It didn’t happen overnight, but I was happy to say that it felt like home. It felt even more homey than usual since my parents were flying in for a visit in a few short hours.

  The door to my office opened and I craned my neck to see who had just barged right in. I relaxed when I realized it was only Brian.

  “What are you doing here?”

  “It is my office,” I said with a grin as he moved around the desk to stand between my spread legs. “Who else did you expect to find here?”

  “That’s not what I meant and you know it,” he said seriously as he rested his hands on my hips.

  He was right. I knew exactly what he meant, I just didn’t happen to agree. I loved my job and nothing was going to keep me from it.

  Once we came out as a couple, Brian called for a meeting and made it known that he had no intention of giving me a promotion himself—ever. Instead, he put together a small group of people to be in charge of keeping an eye on me and deciding whether or not I was worthy of advancement.

  It only took a year for the ring to move from my neck to my finger, but it took three years to get ‘Mallory Wolfe; Junior Editor’ on the nameplate of an office. Nothing could keep me away. Not even—

  “The doctor said your water’s going to break any day. You should be at home.”

  “You came in,” I countered, narrowing my eyes when he rolled his. “What? It’s not like the job is strenuous.”

  “No, but I damn well know how stressful it can be. The doctor said it might be the reason why you’re late.” Brian paused and moved his hands to rest on my swollen stomach before he added, “He also said he wants you in on Friday whether your water breaks or not.”

  “It’ll break. I—”

  “Baby, please.”

  I looked up into his worried eyes and suddenly it all made sense. The original plan was for him to spend the week home with me. After all, I was supposed to deliver four days ago.

  “Is that why you came in today? To call the doctor somewhere that I couldn’t hear you?”

  He hesitated for a moment before finally admitting, “I went to see him this morning before I came here. I’m worried and wanted some advice.”

  “My mom said—”

  “Stop right there. I love your mother—I truly do—but the only advice I’d ask her for is what kind of drugs to try before I die.”

  “Are you calling my mom a hippie?”

  “She kind of is.”

  Well, he kind of had me there. My mom was the free-spirited type to the bone. Still, that didn’t make her advice any less valid in my eyes.

  “You know, she’s the one who convinced me to go to your office and give us a try.”

  “And I’m eternally grateful for that. But I’d still rather take medical advice from a doctor.”

  His hand had ghosted back down to my hips while he spoke and he was tugging me back to the edge of the desk.

  “Brian, no. It hurts.”

  “I’ve got you,” he said, shushing me as he propped up my thighs and held my weight. “So what do you say?”

  “About what?”

  “Following the doctor’s advice.”

  “I still don’t know what you want me to—oh,” I gasped when I felt his hard cock nudge against my thigh. He had a wicked grin on his lips as he waggled his eyebrows suggestively and I couldn’t stop myself from rolling my eyes. “Oh, come on. Your cock is big, but it’s not that big.”

  “My cock is big?” he asked in a fake innocent voice. “I had no idea.”

  “Sure you didn’t. I still don’t see how this is going to help.”

  “Honestly, I’m really not sure either, but the doctor recommended it. I just have to be gentle.”

  “Cause you’re so good at that,” I mumbled sarcastically, though I could feel my body betraying me as his lips moved up my neck.

  “You know I am,” he whispered. His hands pushed my dress up and reached for my panties, tugging at them as he said, “Hips up.”

  Using his shoulders as leverage, I lifted my ass from the desk so he could slide them up. I allowed him to maneuver my weight and hold me up while I worked to free his cock from his slacks.

  He let out a sigh of relief when it bobbed free and it turned into a groan as he guided it to my core and pushed inside. His lips crashed down on mine as he slowly began to move, driving his cock in and out in a smooth rhythm.

  “You okay?” he panted, raising one hand to put it on my stomach. After I nodded, he asked, “You’ll tell me if anything hurts?”

  “Yes.”

  “Good,” he growled, his hand going back to support my weight while his eyes locked on my chest. “Let me see your tits.”

  “They’re sore, Brian. I—”

  “Just want to look at them,” he said, his voice a promise.

  I released my death grip on his shoulders and pulled my dress down enough to free them, unable to stop my smile when he groaned and sped up his hips.

  “Fuck. I love watching them bounce. So fucking sexy,” he grunted between slightly rougher thrusts. “I’m the luckiest bastard on the planet.”

  My first instinct would be to disagree and moan about being a whale, but the orgasm that was starting to build reduced my vocabulary to two words.

  “Brian. More!”

  “Touch yourself. Rub your clit and come all over me,” he ordered, his ragged voice betraying just how close he was. “Let me feel it.”

  I quickly reached down and rubbed myself as best as I could, which was more than enough. I clamped down tight as I came, his name echoing off the walls in my office.

  “Love you, love you, love you,” he chanted before his voice broke off into a long groan. He pumped his hips one last time as he filled me with his seed, leaning his face against my neck as he shuddered hard.

  When I finally regained the ability to speak, I said, “You’re lucky I’m petite. Otherwise, this position probably wouldn’t have worked.”

  “Very lucky,” he agreed as he eased his softening length out with a wince. “That’s going to be a fucking mess. Let me run to the bathroom.”