Lady Hunstanton You needn’t be anxious about him, dear. He is with Lady Stutfield; I saw them some time ago, in the Yellow Drawing-room. They seem quite happy together. You are not going, Caroline? Pray sit down.

  Lady Caroline I think I had better look after John. Exit Lady Caroline.

  Lady Hunstanton It doesn’t do to pay men so much attention. And Caroline has really nothing to be anxious about. Lady Stutfield is very sympathetic. She is just as sympathetic about one thing as she is about another. A beautiful nature.

  Enter Sir John and Mrs. Allonby.

  Ah! here is Sir John! And with Mrs. Allonby too! I suppose it was Mrs. Allonby I saw him with. Sir John, Caroline has been looking everywhere for you.

  Mrs. Allonby We have been waiting for her in the Music-room, dear Lady Hunstanton.

  Lady Hunstanton Ah! the Music-room, of course. I thought it was the Yellow Drawing-room, my memory is getting so defective. To the Archdeacon. Mrs. Daubeny has a wonderful memory, hasn’t she?

  The Archdeacon She used to be quite remarkable for her memory, but since her last attack she recalls chiefly the events of her early childhood. But she finds great pleasure in such retrospections, great pleasure.

  Enter Lady Stutfield and Mr. Kelvil.

  Lady Hunstanton Ah! dear Lady Stutfield! and what has Mr. Kelvil been talking to you about?

  Lady Stutfield About Bimetallism, as well as I remember.

  Lady Hunstanton Bimetallism! Is that quite a nice subject? However, I know people discuss everything very freely nowadays. What did Sir John talk to you about, dear Mrs. Allonby?

  Mrs. Allonby About Patagonia.

  Lady Hunstanton Really? What a remote topic! But very improving, I have no doubt.

  Mrs. Allonby He has been most interesting on the subject of Patagonia. Savages seem to have quite the same views as cultured people on almost all subjects. They are excessively advanced.

  Lady Hunstanton What do they do?

  Mrs. Allonby Apparently everything.

  Lady Hunstanton Well, it is very gratifying, dear Archdeacon, is it not, to find that Human Nature is permanently one.—On the whole, the world is the same world, is it not?

  Lord Illingworth The world is simply divided into two classes—those who believe the incredible, like the public—and those who do the improbable—

  Mrs. Allonby Like yourself?

  Lord Illingworth Yes; I am always astonishing myself. It is the only thing that makes life worth living.

  Lady Stutfield And what have you been doing lately that astonishes you?

  Lord Illingworth I have been discovering all kinds of beautiful qualities in my own nature.

  Mrs. Allonby Ah! don’t become quite perfect all at once. Do it gradually!

  Lord Illingworth I don’t intend to grow perfect at all. At least, I hope I shan’t. It would be most inconvenient. Women love us for our defects. If we have enough of them, they will forgive us everything, even our gigantic intellects.

  Mrs. Allonby It is premature to ask us to forgive analysis. We forgive adoration; that is quite as much as should be expected from us.

  Enter Lord Alfred. He joins Lady Stutfield.

  Lady Hunstanton Ah! we women should forgive everything, shouldn’t we, dear Mrs. Arbuthnot? I am sure you agree with me in that.

  Mrs. Arbuthnot I do not, Lady Hunstanton. I think there are many things women should never forgive.

  Lady Hunstanton What sort of things?

  Mrs. Arbuthnot The ruin of another woman’s life. Moves slowly away to back of stage.

  Lady Hunstanton Ah! those things are very sad, no doubt, but I believe there are admirable homes where people of that kind are looked after and reformed, and I think on the whole that the secret of life is to take things very, very easily.

  Mrs. Allonby The secret of life is never to have an emotion that is unbecoming.

  Lady Stutfield The secret of life is to appreciate the pleasure of being terribly, terribly deceived.

  Kelvil The secret of life is to resist temptation, Lady Stutfield.

  Lord Illingworth There is no secret of life. Life’s aim, if it has one, is simply to be always looking for temptations. There are not nearly enough. I sometimes pass a whole day without coming across a single one. It is quite dreadful. It makes one so nervous about the future.

  Lady Hunstanton Shakes her fan at him. I don’t know how it is, dear Lord Illingworth, but everything you have said today seems to me excessively immoral. It has been most interesting, listening to you.

  Lord Illingworth All thought is immoral. Its very essence is destruction. If you think of anything, you kill it. Nothing survives being thought of.

  Lady Hunstanton I don’t understand a word, Lord Illingworth. But I have no doubt it is all quite true. Personally, I have very little to reproach myself with, on the score of thinking. I don’t believe in women thinking too much. Women should think in moderation, as they should do all things in moderation.

  Lord Illingworth Moderation is a fatal thing, Lady Hunstanton. Nothing succeeds like excess.

  Lady Hunstanton I hope I shall remember that. It sounds an admirable maxim. But I’m beginning to forget everything. It’s a great misfortune.

  Lord Illingworth It is one of your most fascinating qualities, Lady Hunstanton. No woman should have a memory. Memory in a woman is the beginning of dowdiness. One can always tell from a woman’s bonnet whether she has got a memory or not.

  Lady Hunstanton How charming you are, dear Lord Illingworth. You always find out that one’s most glaring fault is one’s most important virtue. You have the most comforting views of life.

  Enter Farquhar.

  Farquhar Doctor Daubeny’s carriage!

  Lady Hunstanton My dear Archdeacon! It is only half-past ten.

  The Archdeacon Rising. I am afraid I must go, Lady Hunstanton. Tuesday is always one of Mrs. Daubeny’s bad nights.

  Lady Hunstanton Rising. Well, I won’t keep you from her. Goes with him towards door. I have told Farquhar to put a brace of partridge into the carriage. Mrs. Daubeny may fancy them.

  The Archdeacon It is very kind of you, but Mrs. Daubeny never touches solids now. Lives entirely on jellies. But she is wonderfully cheerful, wonderfully cheerful. She has nothing to complain of. Exit with Lady Hunstanton.

  Mrs. Allonby Goes over to Lord Illingworth. There is a beautiful moon tonight.

  Lord Illingworth Let us go and look at it. To look at anything that is inconstant is charming nowadays.

  Mrs. Allonby You have your looking-glass.

  Lord Illingworth It is unkind. It merely shows me my wrinkles.

  Mrs. Allonby Mine is better behaved. It never tells me the truth.

  Lord Illingworth Then it is in love with you.

  Exeunt Sir John, Lady Stutfield, Mr. Kelvil and Lord Alfred.

  Gerald To Lord Illingworth. May I come too?

  Lord Illingworth Do, my dear boy. Moves towards door with Mrs. Allonby and Gerald.

  Lady Caroline enters, looks rapidly round and goes off in opposite direction to that taken by Sir John and Lady Stutfield.

  Mrs. Arbuthnot Gerald!

  Gerald What, mother!

  Exit Lord Illingworth with Mrs. Allonby.

  Mrs. Arbuthnot It is getting late. Let us go home.

  Gerald My dear mother. Do let us wait a little longer. Lord Illingworth is so delightful, and, by the way, mother, I have a great surprise for you. We are starting for India at the end of this month.

  Mrs. Arbuthnot Let us go home.

  Gerald If you really want to, of course, mother, but I must bid goodbye to Lord Illingworth first. I’ll be back in five minutes. Exit.

  Mrs. Arbuthnot Let him leave me if he chooses, but not with him—not with him! I couldn’t bear it. Walks up and down.

  Enter Hester.

  Hester What a lovely night it is, Mrs. Arbuthnot.

  Mrs. Arbuthnot Is it?

  Hester Mrs. Arbuthnot, I wish you would let us be friends. You are so different from the other women here. When you came into the Drawing-room this evening, somehow you brought with you a sense of what is good and pure in life. I had been foolish. There are things that are right to say, but that may be said at the wrong time and to the wrong people.

  Mrs. Arbuthnot I heard what you said. I agree with it, Miss Worsley.

  Hester I didn’t know you had heard it. But I knew you would agree with me. A woman who has sinned should be punished, shouldn’t she?

  Mrs. Arbuthnot Yes.

  Hester She shouldn’t be allowed to come into the society of good men and women?

  Mrs. Arbuthnot She should not.

  Hester And the man should be punished in the same way?

  Mrs. Arbuthnot In the same way. And the children, if there are children, in the same way also?

  Hester Yes, it is right that the sins of the parents should be visited on the children. It is a just law. It is God’s law.

  Mrs. Arbuthnot It is one of God’s terrible laws. Moves away to fireplace.

  Hester You are distressed about your son leaving you, Mrs. Arbuthnot?

  Mrs. Arbuthnot Yes.

  Hester Do you like him going away with Lord Illingworth? Of course there is position, no doubt, and money, but position and money are not everything, are they?

  Mrs. Arbuthnot They are nothing; they bring misery.

  Hester Then why do you let your son go with him?

  Mrs. Arbuthnot He wishes it himself.

  Hester But if you asked him he would stay, would he not?

  Mrs. Arbuthnot He has set his heart on going.

  Hester He couldn’t refuse you anything. He loves you too much. Ask him to stay. Let me send him in to you. He is on the terrace at this moment with Lord Illingworth. I heard them laughing together as I passed through the Music-room.

  Mrs. Arbuthnot Don’t trouble, Miss Worsley, I can wait. It is of no consequence.

  Hester No, I’ll tell him you want him. Do—do ask him to stay. Exit Hester.

  Mrs. Arbuthnot He won’t come—I know he won’t come.

  Enter Lady Caroline. She looks round anxiously. Enter Gerald.

  Lady Caroline Mr. Arbuthnot, may I ask you is Sir John anywhere on the terrace?

  Gerald No, Lady Caroline, he is not on the terrace.

  Lady Caroline It is very curious. It is time for him to retire. Exit Lady Caroline.

  Gerald Dear mother, I am afraid I kept you waiting. I forgot all about it. I am so happy tonight, mother; I have never been so happy.

  Mrs. Arbuthnot At the prospect of going away?

  Gerald Don’t put it like that, mother. Of course I am sorry to leave you. Why, you are the best mother in the whole world. But after all, as Lord Illingworth says, it is impossible to live in such a place as Wrockley. You don’t mind it. But I’m ambitious; I want something more than that. I want to have a career. I want to do something that will make you proud of me, and Lord Illingworth is going to help me. He is going to do everything for me.

  Mrs. Arbuthnot Gerald, don’t go away with Lord Illingworth. I implore you not to. Gerald, I beg you!

  Gerald Mother, how changeable you are! You don’t seem to know your own mind for a single moment. An hour and a half ago in the Drawing-room you agreed to the whole thing; now you turn round and make objections, and try to force me to give up my one chance in life. Yes, my one chance. You don’t suppose that men like Lord Illingworth are to be found every day, do you, mother? It is very strange that when I have had such a wonderful piece of good luck, the one person to put difficulties in my way should be my own mother. Besides, you know, mother, I love Hester Worsley. Who could help loving her? I love her more than I have ever told you, far more. And if I had a position, if I had prospects, I could—I could ask her to—Don’t you understand now, mother, what it means to me to be Lord Illingworth’s secretary? To start like that is to find a career ready for one—before one—waiting for one. If I were Lord Illingworth’s secretary I could ask Hester to be my wife. As a wretched bank clerk with a hundred a year it would be an impertinence.

  Mrs. Arbuthnot I fear you need have no hopes of Miss Worsley. I know her views on life. She has just told them to me. A pause.

  Gerald Then I have my ambition left, at any rate. That is something—I am glad I have that! You have always tried to crush my ambition, mother—haven’t you? You have told me that the world is a wicked place, that success is not worth having, that society is shallow, and all that sort of thing—well, I don’t believe it, mother. I think the world must be delightful. I think society must be exquisite. I think success is a thing worth having. You have been wrong in all that you taught me, mother, quite wrong. Lord Illingworth is a successful man. He is a fashionable man. He is a man who lives in the world and for it. Well, I would give anything to be just like Lord Illingworth.

  Mrs. Arbuthnot I would sooner see you dead.

  Gerald Mother, what is your objection to Lord Illingworth? Tell me—tell me right out. What is it?

  Mrs. Arbuthnot He is a bad man.

  Gerald In what way bad? I don’t understand what you mean.

  Mrs. Arbuthnot I will tell you.

  Gerald I suppose you think him bad, because he doesn’t believe the same things as you do. Well, men are different from women, mother. It is natural that they should have different views.

  Mrs. Arbuthnot It is not what Lord Illingworth believes, or what he does not believe, that makes him bad. It is what he is.

  Gerald Mother, is it something you know of him? Something you actually know?

  Mrs. Arbuthnot It is something I know.

  Gerald Something you are quite sure of?

  Mrs. Arbuthnot Quite sure of.

  Gerald How long have you known it?

  Mrs. Arbuthnot For twenty years.

  Gerald Is it fair to go back twenty years in any man’s career? And what have you or I to do with Lord Illingworth’s early life? What business is it of ours?

  Mrs. Arbuthnot What this man has been, he is now, and will be always.

  Gerald Mother, tell me what Lord Illingworth did? If he did anything shameful, I will not go away with him. Surely you know me well enough for that?

  Mrs. Arbuthnot Gerald, come near to me. Quite close to me, as you used to do when you were a little boy, when you were mother’s own boy. Gerald sits down beside his mother. She runs her fingers through his hair, and strokes his hands. Gerald, there was a girl once, she was very young, she was little over eighteen at the time. George Harford—that was Lord Illingworth’s name then—George Harford met her. She knew nothing about life. He—knew everything. He made this girl love him. He made her love him so much that she left her father’s house with him one morning. She loved him so much, and he had promised to marry her! He had solemnly promised to marry her, and she had believed him. She was very young, and—and ignorant of what life really is. But he put the marriage off from week to week, and month to month.—She trusted in him all the while. She loved him.—Before her child was born—for she had a child—she implored him for the child’s sake to marry her, that the child might have a name, that her sin might not be visited on the child, who was innocent. He refused. After the child was born she left him, taking the child away, and her life was ruined, and her soul ruined, and all that was sweet, and good, and pure in her ruined also. She suffered terribly—she suffers now. She will always suffer. For her there is no joy, no peace, no atonement. She is a woman who drags a chain like a guilty thing. She is a woman who wears a mask, like a thing that is a leper. The fire cannot purify her. The waters cannot quench her anguish. Nothing can heal her! no anodyne can give her sleep! no poppies forgetfulness! She is lost! She is a lost soul!—That is why I call Lord Illingworth a bad man. That is why I don’t want my boy to be with him.

  Gerald My dear mother, it all sounds very tragic, of course. But I dare say the girl was just as much to blame as Lord Illingworth was.—After all, would a really nice girl, a girl with any nice feelings at all, go away from her home with a man to whom she was not married, and live with him as his wife? No nice girl would.