The very lovely distraction—that was a kick in the gut.

  But Halo wasn’t sure how American women phrased things. And, for sure, he wasn’t going to press her. He was just going to let the day unfold.

  “Morning.” Halo lifted a hand when he saw Nutsbe at the table, computer open, papers stacked neatly to the side.

  “Mary?”

  “She’s meeting me down here in a few minutes.”

  “Paperwork is ready for her signature.” Nutsbe pointed to the chair across from him, and Halo sat down, signaling Max to lie under the table.

  “You’re new with Iniquus,” Nutsbe said, “and I know you were told this in your initial training, but I’m going to do you a favor and hammer it home while it’s just the two of us.”

  “Okay.”

  “Iniquus has a firm keep your zipper zipped policy. Command is serious about that. If Mary goes to the bog, she is under your protection and, therefore, your subordinate. There can be nothing physical that transpires between you. No kissing. No handholding unless you are offering assistance. There is a zero-tolerance policy. It will get you canned quicker than most anything.”

  “Yes, I quite understand,” Halo said.

  “No extracurricular activities of any kind. That is, no extra-curricular activities unless sanctioned as a part of the mission.”

  Halo’s brow drew together. “When would that happen?”

  “It won’t,” Nutsbe said emphatically. “So this is any physical contact that you would not have engaged in when you were on a task force to protect the Australian prime minister. Stabilizing, lifting, carrying, palpating as a medic, yes. Any other reason a zero tolerance.”

  “Right. Zero,” Halo said.

  “There will be no reason under any circumstances that there would be room for a complaint or sexually inappropriate behavior. Could an individual give you consent, and you act on it? Negative. Why? Because they are yours to guard.”

  “Bloody hell, mate, I can cancel and just tell her it won’t work.”

  “Not necessary, I don’t want Mary disappointed. If she wants to go out to the bog with you and Max, we just need her signature, and I’ll time-stamp it correctly. And you will explain to her the change in your demeanor. Look,” Nutsbe leaned back in his chair, “you two were locked in on a very difficult and dangerous mission with children’s lives on the line. I’m not unaware of the effects. Honestly, four men on my team met their wives or got engaged under such circumstances. It’s the intensity and trust.”

  “Yes.” Yes, that was precisely it. And others on the team had been through this, too. Interesting.

  “No matter what happens around you,” Nutsbe continued, “just like in the Commandos, it is put aside for the safety and wellbeing of your precious cargo. She goes into the bog one hundred percent; she comes out of the bog one hundred percent. We’ll put an end time on the contract with her return to the hotel. So She needs to arrive at the hotel, get out of the car, and walk into the hotel alone. The contract ends.”

  “You’re being very granular about this process.”

  Nutsbe leaned forward and lowered his voice. “Command ended a contract recently with a man who thought perhaps the strict rules of non-engagement didn’t apply to him. While the woman made no complaints and attested to her consent, that was entirely beside the point. He knew it. He chose to ignore the consequences. The men who can pass through the vetting stage at Iniquus are few. We can’t afford to have such departures. And since you’re new, I want to hammer this home. Strict discipline is required, as is befitting a special operator. If you think you’ll be tempted to lean in and kiss her, I’d leave her home, man. My best advice.”

  “Understood.” Halo decided to take the tension down a peg. “I’m guessing this kind of little talk is why your team calls you mum?”

  “Good morning, Mary!” Nutsbe smile.

  Halo looked around, and his heart skipped a beat as Mary came closer.

  “Good morning, Nutsbe. Did you sleep well?”

  ***

  “Nutsbe’s a very nice guy,” Mary said as they moved through the automatic doors toward the rental car.

  “I think so.” Nutsbe was right. Halo was going to have to keep a tight rein. His hand automatically reached for hers, and at the last second, he drew it back.

  “He has a different patch on his uniform.”

  “He’s on Panther Force, that’s a tactical team. I’m Cerberus—that’s a K9 team.” Halo reached past her to open the door and held it as she climbed in.

  With Max in the back seat and safety belts cinched into place, Halo set his phone—GPS open—into the ashtray, but that was for verification. He would try to rely on his shirt’s directions.

  One interesting thing Halo learned was that right now, Russians have the capacity to hack Ukrainian drones and alter their GPS information. And likewise, it was possible to hack their shirts if the shirts were being routed via satellite. But if his shirt was offline, gathering the data from the device he carried with him, then he was safe from any interference.

  They were silent as Halo got onto the highway, heading south out of the city.

  “Tell me about Iniquus. You said that you were just hired?” Mary asked.

  “Iniquus is looking at the geo-political world and upcoming threats. With extreme and unpredictable weather, we think our clients will find themselves in extraordinary circumstances that will require professional help. They’re adding additional teams to meet the needs. I’m the first member of Team Charlie. Cerberus Team Alpha was over in Italy last week digging our clients out of the mudslide.”

  “I think I saw that in the news. The university students?”

  “That’s my understanding.” Halo drove onto the highway where traffic was light, and the sound of the road was a steady hum.

  “But the governments are there, right?” Mary swiveled in her seat so she was facing him. “They’re training, too?

  “Yes. Of course, and they do a great job. But they’re focusing on everyone, and if you’re our client—like you are today—we are focused uniquely on you.”

  Her chin pulled back. “You’d pass up a baby?”

  “I didn’t say that. I hope I never face that. We’re mission-focused, bypassing all the other needs to get to our client.”

  “Well, I can understand that, but it still seems cold-hearted.”

  “Once we’ve fulfilled our contractual obligations, then we stay in the country and help if our help is needed and beneficial.”

  “Lives on the line.”

  “That’s the job.”

  “Yeah, that explains the team at the fire. But why is Iniquus here? Estonia doesn’t have a lot of natural disasters. I guess there could be manmade ones, like if the Russians pulled some shenanigans.”

  “Panther Force is providing security for an upcoming client event.”

  Leaving the city, the countryside widened in front of them.

  They drove in an easy silence until Mary whispered. “Okay, this is going to be harder than I anticipated. I really want to hold your hand.”

  A grin spread over Halo’s face.

  He’d just been thinking the same thing.

  Chapter Twenty

  Halo angled the car to the slight pressure of his sleeve on his right forearm. “Stop number one. Our client will be coming here to the waterfall for a picnic.”

  “Oh!” Mary said, looking over to where the river flowed over the lip of limestone in a picturesque shower. “This is lovely.”

  “At the top of the falls, the river’s not deep, just over the ankles. We walked across it, and it was an interesting experience. Do you want to try?”

  Following Halo’s lead, Mary sat down on the flat rock, took off her shoes and socks, and then rolled her pants cuffs to her knees.

  Standing on the water’s edge, he held his hand out to her. “Here at the shoreline, it’s a little slippery. Would you like my assistance?”

  “I think that while my feet are in the water, it would be best that you held my hand so I felt safe.” She smiled, and then her brows lifted. “Oh, it really is slippery.”

  “Two more steps.”

  They’d reached the part of the river covered with green grass-like plants that thrived under the crystal-clear cool waters.

  “It’s like walking on carpet, isn’t it?” With Mary grasping his hands, they stood in the middle of the river, letting the water, cool and clean, swirl around their ankles and over the broad ledge.

  Looking down at Mary, Halo realized how little he knew about her. He didn’t even know if she was single.

  Nutsbe hadn’t said anything about the direction of Halo’s conversation, just the direction of his hands. And his zipper. “On the stage, you said that you’re divorced? I’m assuming you aren’t in a relationship now?”

  “You mean after I slept with you?” She laughed. “No, I’m not that kind of girl. But you’re right to ask. I guess maybe we should have checked in with each other about that. I might have made character assumptions—nope, not a good way to say that. Let me try again. Are you involved with someone right now?”

  “Besides you?” He chuckled. “No.”

  “Me? We’re involved?” She said it under her breath; he almost didn’t catch it.

  “You wouldn’t say?” He sent a glance her way, reading confusion in her eyes before he focused on the woods, raising his hand to point out a family of rabbits.

  “I don’t know what to say other than this week is happening very fast.”

  Was he the only one feeling this way? When he woke that morning, he’d looked over and felt such a sense of peace to find her beside him. It was, in its own way, like when he had seen Max and known they belonged together. It had been such a solid sensation. It had such a rightness about it that—Yeah, that was bloody unfair to this woman.

  Halo decided to move the conversation back to basics. “And you have children? You mentioned you had sons?”

  “Twins. They’re twenty-one now. Both were diagnosed with ADHD when they were little. And to say that I was very busy and very exhausted all the time is putting it mildly.”

  “Military wife, that, too, isn’t an easy go.”

  “No, it wasn’t. It felt like Dan always had one foot in the marriage and one foot somewhere else.” Squeezing Halo’s hands, she lifted one foot and swished it back and forth through the current. “When the boys hit high school, the writing was on the wall for the death of my marriage. It was a bit terrifying. I had a high school education. I had been a mother and a volunteer. Busy, always busy, exhausted in my busyness, but there’s not much to put on a resume—not for a job that makes enough money to pay the bills. So Dan—my ex—was staying in the military until he hit his retirement requirements at twenty years. I asked him to hold off on the divorce until then, let me get through college on spousal benefits, and at least have something in the way of a future. That’s how it spun out. My friend Deidre, who I’m traveling with, went to nursing school with me.”

  She paused with her hand shielding her eyes and cast her gaze around before she looked at him again. Halo thought she might be trying to figure out what to share and how much was too much. As far as Halo went, he hoped she wouldn’t censor herself. He found everything about Mary fascinating.

  “When our kids graduated high school, we graduated with our nursing degrees. Deidre does surgical nursing now. I spent four years in the emergency department. This last May, my kids graduated from university and permanently flew away.” She frowned. “I am officially an empty nester.”

  She turned and watched the water slide over the lip of rock. They stood that way for a long moment.

  Turning to him, the grip on his hand a little tighter, Mary said, “I’m making progress on being an individual. I have my own little place with a garden. I just finished up my qualifications and am about to start my new job as a flight nurse.”

  “My nurse friends have the best stories,” Halo smiled. “Did you get a lot of crazy things in things happen in the emergency room?”

  “When I was at the store the other day, I saw they were already putting up Christmas decorations in the far corner when it’s not even Halloween yet. Anyway, during the holiday season, we get a lot of tree-shaped objects stuck up people’s—and by people, I mean men’s—backsides. Sometimes, they’re made out of material that breaks under pressure, and that’s problematic, often surgical. Soon manufacturers are going to need to put warning labels on their seasonal décor.”

  “Ouch.”

  “That about sums it up.”

  They turned and, still hand in hand, walked up the river, watching as Max ran joyfully from one side to the other, bounding up the rocks and leaping back down.

  “And your divorce? You have a child?” Mary asked. “Children?”

  “A daughter. Stella. My ex-wife and I separated early in our marriage. She wanted to pursue a career that could only happen in Europe. She wanted Europe for our daughter.”

  “And you agreed?”

  “I was deployed when she made the decision unilaterally.”

  “Oh, wow.”

  “We were in touch,” Halo clarified. “She didn’t sneak away. My career took me to Afghanistan. How could I tell her that her career needed to keep her in Australia?”

  “I guess you couldn’t. Did you think you would join them after your tour?”

  “I had contracts to fulfill. And I was doing the thing that I felt in my heart I was supposed to be doing. I’m not a selfish enough man to keep her from her goals.”

  “But your daughter.”

  “Wasn’t in Afghanistan. She was safe. Healthy. Well cared for. Great schools. Lovely friends. And I got to always be the good guy. Which to this day pisses her mother off.”

  “Mmmm.”

  “What does that mean?”

  “I might be painting a picture that isn’t true. Might be a cultural difference. How did you get to be the good guy?”

  “I video-called Stella every opportunity I could. I read her books, listened to her day, told her jokes, and sang her songs.”

  “You sing?”

  “Everyone can sing. Can I sing well? Well, enough that I made my daughter giggle.”

  “Got it.” Mary seemed to tense. “Your wife was the disciplinarian, and you were the joy in her life.”

  He looked down and whispered, “In my job, I never knew if it was going to be the last time I talked to her. And I —”

  “Halo, stop.” She turned and looked at him sternly. “Don’t.”

  “You were a soldier’s wife.”

  “Navy wife, but I get it. It was on my mind every time I spoke with my ex. I thought:

  This could be the last time I talk to him. I was careful not to bring this up, not bring that up. It made for very superficial conversations. A little different, though.” She turned and started walking again. “He really wasn’t in the kinds of dangers others were in. Like you were in. My children’s father was in a sub. We couldn’t communicate a lot when he was deployed. When he was home, things were tense. I ran the household as a single parent. Not true. I co-parented with my friend Diedre. We’ve pretty much done everything together from the time our three boys were born a day apart.”

  “A litter of pups. I bet the dads were really glad, though, knowing you two had each other’s support when they weren’t at home.”

  “When our husbands came home, they wanted things the way they’d left them. Not bad, mind you. Just he’d walk in the door, and all of my systems would suddenly be turned upside down. I lost control to him. He didn’t have the same concerns that you did. He was fine with being the disciplinarian.” There was an edge of resentment to her tone. “He wanted to make sure that if I had softened my boys’ hearts while he was gone, he toughened them back up by the time he went back to sea.” She shot a glance over to Halo. “That made him sound abusive. He wasn’t. I don’t think so, anyway. It’s just that I got tired of it. We made a truce of sorts. It sounds like you and your ex found a different way of handling things.” She turned back toward Max, who was trotting along with a massive branch in his mouth, making her laugh.

  “I had my life in the military and Australia. But I also prioritized my relationship with Stella.”

  “You just moved to America. Had you thought of moving where she is?”

  “Yes, and her mother and I agreed that I shouldn’t do that. Stella’s a teenager and being very teenagery, especially towards her mum.”

  “I know what that means.”

  “There’s a bit of safety for Stella, I think, in the physical distance that allows us to stay emotionally connected. We’ve always had a mostly electronic relationship. My leaves from the military were always spent where she was, but it’s mostly at arm’s length. I’m not the disciplinarian—that was a mutual decision. I’m the steady wall for Stella to lean against. She hasn’t shut down to me. Her mother thinks it’s important that at least one of us can maintain that open connection.”

  “I’m happy and jealous for you. That’s a great place to be in.”

  “Her mother doesn’t have that luxury, and I see the toll. The frustration. Sometimes, it makes me feel selfish as hell to get the relationship with little of the burden. I’m sorry for your pain.”

  “Yeah.”

  And because a heaviness had draped itself over Mary’s shoulders, he thought a change of location might help. “Is it all right that we head on now? I want to make sure there’s enough daylight to move through the bog.”

  Chapter Twenty-One

  It was a quiet drive to the forest.

  Companionably quiet.

  Whatever shadow had crossed over Mary out in the river had lifted, and she was just enjoying, not feeling any pressure to entertain Halo. The absolute—and stunning—comfort of sitting beside him. Peace, Mary realized. What she was feeling was peace. And then she scanned back along her timeline to see why that feeling was so novel for her. And she couldn’t remember a time when she’d actually felt peace, but instead, she’d spent time imagining what that might feel like.