What had I been thinking?

  I knew what I’d been thinking. I’d been thinking that heading back to my apartment and a last roll and tumble with Rex Parker before I took him to the airport would be a whole lot more fun if I were energetic.

  But after a night like tonight, who was in the mood for a romping stomping good time?

  Dead bodies sucked the sexy out of the atmosphere.

  As well it should.

  I remembered back to Kay’s last birthday party when I’d had a date lined up with a gynecologist as part of an experiment into expanding my dating horizons. I’d been warned off. Rumor had it that gynos were understandably tired of girly parts after a full day of medical interventions for the female nether regions. I got it. Fine. I canceled, so I never put that theory into test mode. But I was suddenly wondering about the long-term impact on people who, like Dick, investigated murders. Like he did this morning. Like he had the time I was in the woods with human remains when I found my neighbor’s body. How were cops able to come home at night and think sexy time?

  Dead Licker absolutely killed my libido. It didn’t even feel revivable.

  That would sure be a shame.

  I liked sexy time.

  When I stuck my bottom lip out in a pout, Twinkles lifted his head to check on me.

  “Pity party,” I told him, and he clunked his head back down.

  Bella was asleep curled up against Twinkles’ tummy, her pain medications seemed to be doing their job. And Twinkles had a comforting effect. Just being near him always helped me.

  If it weren’t for him, I’d be alone to deal with my emotions.

  Kay had gone on to work at the law office; they had a trial coming up, and it was all hands on deck. She’d be here later to watch Farrah’s dating game.

  Rex was asleep at my apartment. He was staying in town for a couple of days at Dick’s request since he was one of the witnesses. This evening, Rex had a videoconference he was taking since he couldn’t show up in person. He needed to be clear thinking for that meeting. I had left the apartment so Twinkles, Bella, and I wouldn’t disturb his rest as we moved about.

  No way in this world did I want to lie down and close my eyes.

  I needed to be here at the bar, anyway, getting ready for tonight’s event and babysitting Bella while Kay went to work.

  Bella, as it turned out, was not a leopard but a Savannah—larger than a domestic cat and more like a dog in personality—walking on a lead, following commands. Maybe that’s why she and Twinkles took to each other instantly. Kay said she’d foster Bella until we could find the owner. Not everyone would have a cat like this, it was a twenty-thousand-dollar cat. Surely someone was looking for her.

  Last night, Bella had appeared at the exact moment the woman we were stalking disappeared. She’d been wearing leopard leggings. From the distance of where our car was parked, with her standing away from a streetlamp, in the night, it was possible that she had Bella with her. But for sure, none of us saw a leopard-like cat with her. Still, if I saw her around, I’d ask. If Bella was hers, why wouldn’t she say something to us? No, that didn’t make any sense at all. These must be two unrelated things: us chasing some poor woman and scaring the bejeezus out of her, and Kay running over Bella’s lead.

  “Sorry, cat lady. I’ll never do that again,” I called toward my ceiling. “Lesson learned."

  Since Bella wasn’t your average stray, Kay put this in the hands of the police department.

  Yeah, this was better left up to the police.

  I was curled up on the sofa with a cup of juice by my side and the local paper opened to read about last night’s incident.

  The licker’s name had been Sarah Elizabeth Gooch. And that had its own set of problems. Journalists from up and down the East Coast had been dialing me up to ask what had happened. They must have gotten my name from the police report because Hooch’s answering machine was full.

  I finally unplugged the phone.

  It was a weird story and should probably make the local paper. I wouldn’t think it would have any kind of reach outside of Jamesburg. But Sarah Elizabeth Gooch, as it turned out, was Shenandoah Valley royalty. Yup, she was the princess of the Gooch family, the heiress who had been in line to the Gooch Mining fortune. And, as it turned out, she was also House Representative Waller Gooch’s only child. “Imagine growing up with that name,” I said out loud, “Waller Gooch.”

  There wasn’t much to the story in the paper. I guessed the police were holding their cards tight to the vest. The article just said that Sarah Elizabeth had died from blunt force trauma when she tripped in the woods and hit her head. It didn’t say anything about the odd circumstances. But surely there was something else behind this story. And I bet the journalists thought so too and that’s why they were calling me.

  I had a list of questions I’d like answered myself.

  Like, why was her tongue black and why was she acting crazy?

  Another article on the front page answered a different question for me. Who was in the accident just up the street from the veterinary hospital?

  It turned out that Remus Merrymaker was the victim of a hit and run. And I knew who had hit him and where she had run.

  And now I understood why someone in Sarah Elizabeth’s state of mind thought she was being chased by a wolf. I knew that Remus, like the rest of his motorcycle riding cop buddies in The Pack, had a set of lights on the front of his motorcycle that looked like glowing green wolf eyes. On the back of his bike, he’d attached a thick fury faux tail. Just part of the club’s fun.

  I guessed when you were high from some lick-able substance that it could be confusing. I’m sure that Dick put two and two together. Obviously, it wasn’t the squirrel that Sarah Elizabeth had hit that made the noise that got her to stop. It was Remus’s motorcycle.

  According to the article, Remus had been checked out at St Esmerelda’s and released. Banged and bruised, but otherwise fine.

  Thank goodness.

  And it said that Remus had been acting in his official capacity at the time.

  I wondered if he was chasing Sarah Elizabeth, trying to get her to stop. That seemed about right to me. His tactic would be to charge up on her, signal her to stop, and then get in front of her as he gradually lowered his speed. I’d ask Tadger when he came in later.

  I was pretty sure Tadger would be in later. I knew for a fact that Luna was planning to be here to help Farrah with the Chemistry event.

  There was a knock on the office door.

  Speak of the devil, here was Luna.

  “Hey there. I was running early,” she said, “and was a little nervous about standing outside with the licker on the loose.”

  “Understandable,” I said, swinging my legs around. “Joe, let you in?”

  “I came in with Justice.”

  “Oh, good. She’s here then.”

  Luna eyed Twinkles with his paws wrapped around Bella. Her brow drew together, and she made a pouty face. I would swear she was putting out a jealous vibe, but that would be…weird. When she looked over to me and found me eyeing her curiously, she said, “I hope you don’t mind my saying, but you looked wiped out.”

  “I haven’t been to sleep in a couple of days. Last night, after the bar closed, I was helping to teach Kay how to shift.” I gestured toward the enormous feline wrapped in Twinkles’s paws. “And voila, now we have Bella.”

  Luna gasped, hands to her cheeks. “Kay shifted last night? Wow! Did she have trouble?”

  “Fits and starts. She was getting the hang of it by the end. I think she’ll do fine from here on. It just takes practice.”

  Luna nodded seriously. Then, she stilled, her focus to Twinkles and Bella. I could see the cogs whirring. “Are Tadger and Kay a couple?” she whispered.

  “Tadger, Kay, and I have run around in the same circles since kindergarten. Kay’s dating a guy who’s in Europe right now.” I quirked my head to the side to watch her reaction as I added, “Tadger seems to be pretty interested in you.”

  “Oh, I’m completely over the moon when it comes to Tadger.” She laced her fingers and brought her hands under her chin. “He’s dreamy.” After a sigh, she looked back down to Bella. “Kay’s just a late bloomer? That’s good to know. It gives me hope.”

  Huh. Weird.

  10

  Wednesday, 2:30 P.M.

  There was a knock on the front door. I went to unlock it for Dick and Farrah. They were deep into their kiss when I popped the door open.

  “Hey there,” I said so they’d realize there was an audience.

  “Farrah!” Luna called. “Come look! Kay was learning to shift last night!”

  Farrah got a bemused look on her face and headed toward my office.

  “BJ, while you get set up,” Dick whispered. “I told Farrah I need to take Twinkles for a walk for you.”

  “Okay… Is there a specific reason?”

  “I like Farrah. I really like her. But she’s a vegan and only dates vegans.”

  “Does that have anything to do with her involvement with ShifterCon?” I asked with a grin.

  “What?”

  “Never mind, it made sense in my head, there’s a joke in there somewhere—you don’t want to eat an animal because it could well be one of your friends.”

  He squinted at me.

  “Look, I’m exhausted, ignore anything insane I say. What’s this about you becoming vegan?”

  “All I’ve had to eat since yesterday was rabbit food. I’m going to grab a cardiac arrest burger—two of them. Maybe three before I pass out from lack of protein. I should have got something last night, but…circumstances.”

  “Yeah. I wasn’t much hungry, either. It’s been a rough day.”

  “I know.” He pulled me into a hug, and I got to rest my forehead on his shoulder where I always felt his support. And cared for. He was a good friend.

  I leaned back so we could conspire about him hiding his meat before Farrah came back in the room. “I feel for you Dick I do, but I don’t want Twinkles around the cardiac arrest burgers. He’s on a diet. I let him have a burger from Rex yesterday. I really can’t let him have any more. And you know he’ll give you that pitiful look of his and whine until you give in.”

  Dick exhaled hard.

  “Look, how about you take Twinkles and Bella to Kay’s apartment? I was about to do that anyway. That way you have an excuse to go out and eat. And probably brush your teeth. I hear vegans can smell meat on your breath.”

  “That’s what Farrah said, that’s why I’ve only had alfalfa sprouts to eat since we met.”

  “Poor guy.”

  “Their leads are in the back?”

  “Yup, and Kay’s keys are on my desk with the pink pompom.”

  “I’ll be back.”

  Farrah and Luna wandered back into the main room. “Bella’s a beautiful cat,” Farrah said.

  “She is, isn’t she?” I smiled.

  Dick dropped a kiss on Farrah’s lips. “I’m running an errand. I’ll be back as quick as I can. Good luck tonight!”

  As he stepped away, Farrah blew him a kiss and batted her eyelashes. I thought, as happy as I was that Dick dove into the dating pool, that he wouldn’t be in there long. How long could a man like Dick go without touching his meat?

  “Let’s get ready!” I said, pulling the table placement schematic that Farrah had drawn from under the counter and handing it to her. “Here’s the plan. I’m just going to go check in with Joe and Justice about tonight. I’ll be back in two seconds.”

  As I headed back to the kitchen, I heard male voices.

  The kitchen was full. Justice, Kay, and Joe were watching a video on Justice’s phone, cackling.

  And there stood Tadger, all decked out in his Jamesburg Police Force blues, gold badge over his heart, muscles bulging against his sleeves, with his tool belt heavy on his hips. Yummy, I’ll readily admit. But with Tadger, I wasn’t tempted to act on those thoughts. Been there, tried that, not as much of a Merrymaker as his name would suggest. That wasn’t fair. Just not the kind of merry I liked to make.

  Dick stood by the alley exit, beside Twinkles and Bella, their leads in his hands.

  Tadger went down on a knee to scratch Bella behind the ears. She put her paws up on his shoulder, giving him a hug in return.

  “You’re on duty, Tadger?” I asked.

  “Yeah, I thought I’d check on you as I head into the station.”

  “And I’m heading out,” Dick said, his stomach growling. “Kay, any instructions? I’m taking these two to your apartment.”

  “No, I have everything set up for them. I just need the keys back before too long so I can go practice in the Ferrari. I thought I’d do that while BJs dating game is going on.” He turned his focus to Tadger as Tadger stood to get out of their way. “How’s Remus doing?”

  “Good, thanks for asking.”

  After Dick left, Tadger turned to me. “Uncle Remus is another reason why I stopped by.” He shifted to lean against the closed door, crossing his arms over his chest. “Uncle Remus has some questions about what went down last night. His undercover team—you know them, The Pack.”

  He paused while I nodded.

  “They’ve been trying to discover the source of the hallucinogenic that’s causing the licker problem. The main thing is, we don’t know what the substance is or how it’s made. It’s ingested. We think perhaps as a lozenge. Last night’s death was the first we can associate with the drug. We want it to be the last.”

  “I’m glad to help. Sarah Elizabeth Gooch shouldn’t have been on the road last night.”

  “No, she shouldn’t have been. She clipped my uncle’s motorcycle, but that well could have been a family van filled with kids. We can’t allow that.”

  Kay came to stand next to me. “Is it only happening in Jamesburg?”

  “The problem with lickers? No, there’s about a hundred-mile radius. Charlottesville has been impacted. But it hasn’t reached Richmond, yet.”

  “And you’re sure that she’d taken the same licker drug?” Kay, Tadger, and I had our heads together, speaking in hushed tones. “Exactly,” I said. “I mean, my dad opened her mouth, and her tongue was streaked black and purple with some substance, but she didn’t lick anyone or anything. She was out of her mind, though.”

  Kay nodded. “She kept her tongue to herself at the vet’s.”

  “She had done her licking before Uncle Remus tried to stop her,” Tadger said.

  “You know what would be really shocking?” Kay said loud enough so the whole room could hear. “If she licked an outlet.”

  “Kay…” Tadger said.

  Kay looked over at him innocently. “Speaking of tongues and uncles. Did you know my uncle once took a terrible fall and bit off his tongue?”

  There was a collective sigh.

  “He never talked about it, though.” Kay shrugged.

  “That was tasteless,” Justice said.

  I rolled my eyes. Justice didn’t joke like that when I first hired her. She’d been around Kay way too much. I focused on Tadger. “Tell Remus for me that any time he wants to talk, I’ll be around. I have this event scheduled, and it might get a little busy later. But I’ll do my best to make myself available.”

  “He wanted to speak to Delight, too, if she’d be willing to come in. The undercover part is on the down-low. I’m sure you get that.”

  “My lips are sealed. I can call Delight and ask her to come to Hooch’s if I know what time Remus’s coming.”

  “Okay, thanks.” Tadger reached for the door handle, looking like he was getting ready to go.

  “Luna’s here if you wanted to say hi,” I told him.

  He looked at his watch. “I have a couple of minutes.”

  Kay looked toward my office, looked toward the front, then turned to me. “Luna saw Bella and Twinkles in your office together?”

  “Yes.”

  “I bet she told you you looked awful.”

  I pushed my hair back from my face. I must really look bad. “She did, just not in those words.”

  “What did you tell her?” Kay asked. “Did you tell her about poor Sarah Elizabeth?”

  “No, since I didn’t read any details about her death in the paper’s account, I thought the police might like the specifics kept under wraps.”

  “Thank you for that,” Tadger said. “Good call.”

  “So how did you explain the dark circles?” Kay pressed.

  “I told her that after the bar closed, I was helping you learn how to shift.”

  “Like that? I was teaching Kay how to shift?” Kay asked.

  I tipped my head. “Yeah…”

  Kay jumped up and down, clapping her hands. “This is so perfect.” She kissed me on the cheek then reached out to Tadger, linking their arms. “Let’s go say hi to Luna.” She smiled sweetly at him.

  That was such a ruse. She was so up to something evil.

  I just couldn’t figure out—yet—what it was.

  When we made our way into the bar area together, Farrah and Luna were busy moving tables around.

  Luna looked up. “Kay!” Luna said, shock faced. “Tadger! What are you doing in your uniform? I thought…”

  Luna ran to my office and looked around the empty space, then moved back to the circle.

  Kay was suppressing a grin.

  “You were just…” Luna’s face crinkled with confusion as she looked at Kay. “Now you’re… That was so fast.” Her gaze swept over Tadger. “And just these few stray hairs left from cuddling Bella.” She brushed at the stray Bella hairs that clung to him.

  “I wanted to say hi to you and check-in. I need to get to the station, my shift isn’t over. Will you be around later?” Tadger asked.

  Luna leaned to the right to look behind Tadger. Her eyes swept him from head to foot. The confusion crinkles deepened.

  “Your shift isn’t over,” she whispered to herself. Then louder. “Yes. I’ll be here. Do you need to help Kay?” Luna turned perplexed eyes on Kay. “I heard you were learning to shift for the first time last night.”

  Tadger laughed. “And survived the ordeal.” He held up a hand for Kay to receive a high five. To Luna, he said, “I think she’ll be okay on her own. Sometimes that’s what it takes to get things smoothed out, time to process without the pressure from people watching and commenting.”