I was a hot mess in the best of circumstances. In fact, I should hop out of the damn bus and run right back to my house. But my feet were glued to the rusty floorboards. The whole thing was ripped down to the metal frame—kinda like me.

  His arms strained until finally, he managed to wrench it free. When he turned back to me, there was more intensity lighting his dark eyes. His chest was heaving with exertion, his breathing not nearly as heavy as it should have been after that display.

  “You can’t say something like that, and then just pretend everything is the same.”

  “You aren’t interested.”

  “I didn’t say that.”

  He wiped his hands on the back of his jeans as he moved toward me. He was too tall to stand upright in the space and what was once a spacious bus now seemed very crowded.

  I unzipped my vest. All of a sudden, I was very warm. His gaze raked down my body, then his jaw firmed. A fascinating little muscle rippled along his cheekbones.

  Had his lips gotten fuller some time in the last day? Or maybe it was how his beard framed them. I couldn’t look away from them.

  They parted and he flicked his tongue along the lower one before biting it hard enough for the natural color to go white.

  I stepped closer. “Maybe we just try it.”

  His eyebrow arched. “A test kiss?”

  I nodded. “I mean, it might suck, and then we don’t have anything to worry about.”

  He slid his fingers into my hair. “Oh, honey, there’s nothing bad about the way I kiss.”

  “Well, that’s very arrogant.” He kept getting closer and my heart thudded so loud in my ears, I was afraid he’d hear it. His eyes were so dark. Deep brown like the very best coffee and his eyelashes should be illegal. Why did guys get the good lashes while we had to pay for them?

  God, I could feel the heat pumping off him. The curls just above his temples were slightly damp from his attack on the seat. Part of me wanted to stumble back, but my stupid feet were still glued to the floor.

  “I’m sure you think all the women in the world think you’re the—”

  He tipped back my head, spearing his long fingers into the hair at the base of my scalp. “Rachel.”

  “Yes?”

  “Be quiet so I can test kiss you.”

  “Right.” I licked my lips. “Test kiss.”

  “You ready?”

  “You’re such a—”

  Firm and cool lips met mine. My eyes closed in reaction to his closeness. It was weird to kiss with your eyes open, right? Even if I kinda didn’t want to close them. He was pretty.

  And I liked knowing what was coming.

  His thumb slid along my jaw and I opened for him like he had the magic words to my particular lock. It was soft and sweet at first. He brushed his mouth over mine, learning my shape. As if he could take all the time in the world.

  Damn him for being so calm about this.

  I laid my hand on his chest. Not so steady this time. Okay, I could…oh, wow. I went up on my toes and curled my other arm around his neck.

  He slanted his mouth over mine, demanding that I open. Bossy even in his kisses. I twisted the flannel as his heart hammered as violently as my own. He groaned into my mouth and I lost myself in him.

  Long, languid strokes of his tongue along mine suddenly didn’t feel so sweet. His fingers dug into my ass, dragging me closer. I slid my knee between his thighs and rubbed against him like a cat.

  Everything was deliciously hard on him. Especially the length of him digging into my belly. The kiss went from Hallmark sweet to Fifty Shades-hot as if a match had been struck.

  He turned me toward the other door beside us, bracing his arm above us on the roof of the bus while he pressed me against the cool metal and glass. We couldn’t get enough of one another.

  My lips were buzzing from his beard and teeth. He splayed his hand against the glass behind me, pressing me tighter into the small space.

  His thigh lifted between mine and I rolled my hips to get more friction. He scraped his teeth over my lower lip and went for my neck.

  “Oh, God.” I moved to give him more room and he took it. Gosh, did he take it. His lips raced up my neck to nip behind my ear.

  “Think we passed the test,” he murmured.

  For a moment, I thought about shoving his arrogant ass back a step, but he was right. Passed with extra bonus points and double plusses. A plus plus, sir.

  Not that I’d tell him that.

  He nipped my earlobe, then swirled his tongue along my neck. “You smell so good.” He dragged his chin along my jaw, then he returned to my mouth.

  Good. I’d almost told him just how amazing he was.

  He dropped his hand from the roof to my hip. “This wasn’t supposed to happen,” he mumbled against my mouth.

  “Keep saying stupid stuff like that,” I said before diving back in for another kiss before ripping my mouth away from his. “And we’ll be stopping.”

  “Doesn’t feel like we’re gonna stop.” He palmed my ass and helped to grind me on his thigh. “Feels like I want to get inside of you right here in this old bus.”

  “Yes,” I said against his mouth. “Wait, no. That’s probably not a good idea.”

  “Nope, not a good idea.” He used his other hand to grip my hair, giving him access to my throat again. “Such a bad idea.”

  I ripped at the buttons of his shirt. “I know it’s a bad idea, but why do you think it’s a bad idea?” I got enough free to get my fingers under the warm flannel to the rougher texture of his thermal shirt. “You’re so freaking hard.”

  He undulated his hips against me. “I know.”

  “Not that.” But now that I felt it against me, I couldn’t stop thinking about it. “Though that’s good too.” Then my nails dug into his under shirt to the muscles of his abdomen and I was distracted all over again. If I got his shirt off, I’d bet I’d find a six-pack. Maybe even one of those distractible vee things along his belt.

  He kissed me again. This time, his lips were rough and it only drove me crazier. There was that one little niggle at the back of my mind. How did he know how to do that with his tongue?

  I groaned and sipped from his tongue, trying to give as good as I was getting in the kiss department, but he was like a damn professor and I was a student.

  What was with the school metaphors?

  He rolled my hips, upping the friction against his thigh until I was moaning helplessly. There was no way he was going to make me come just from this. No way. It took me forever to orgasm and he hadn’t even touched me—not for real.

  “Wait, wait.”

  He dragged his beardy chin along my neck. “No. Come for me. I want to hear how it sounds.”

  “Wait. You said it was a bad idea for us to do this.”

  “What?”

  “You said—”

  “I know.” He lifted his head to meet my gaze. “It’s bad because…”

  “Why?”

  He frowned. He was still gripping my ass and it was very distracting. “Because I’m no good for someone like you.”

  My hand slid up his chest to grip his shoulder. “What do you mean?”

  He lowered his mouth to mine, biting my lower lip before resting his forehead against mine. “You’re a forever girl.”

  “I’m not.”

  His frown deepened. “Yes, you are.”

  “I’m not.” I lifted my hands to cup his face. “I’m a mess. Bad bet all around. I can’t be more than this. Is that okay?”

  His fingers dug into my ass. “You just want this?”

  I nodded. “I’ve never been wanted like this. I like it. But I can’t be more than…” I dropped my gaze to his mouth and touched his bottom lip with the tip of my forefinger. “I just want to see what this is.” I lifted my gaze to his. “Don’t fall in love with me, Clay.”

  His name felt too right on my lips, but I ignored it. Ignored the rush of warmth flooding my veins. It was lust. Something I’d never really felt before. That was why it was so overwhelming. God, it was so good to feel alive again.

  I took a deep breath. “But I really think you should take me to bed.”

  Chapter 9

  Clay

  You Make Me Crazy

  She was looking up at me with those summer sky eyes full of secrets. Neither of us were trying to be who we really were. Because I knew for sure this woman wasn’t built for a no strings sexcapade.

  And I wasn’t good enough for her.

  For any woman.

  I was made for responsibilities and future mergers, no matter how hard I wanted to run from that role. And here she was, sitting in my one slice of freedom.

  My tree farm where I got to be Clay, the man, not Mr. Winslow, the CEO.

  But for once, I wanted to be worthy of that look. The sassy, infuriating woman made me crazy, but she also made me feel alive for the first time in so goddamn long.

  Rain had started outside sometime—I wasn’t sure when. Distracted much? The ticking against the glass and metal roof indicated that maybe it was a little more than rain. I cupped her face and lowered my head to nuzzle her nose with mine. The air between us was warm enough to steam in the cold of the bus. “Are you sure?”

  “No.”

  I smiled against her mouth. The first true thing she’d said to me. “You can change your mind.”

  She slid her hands down my chest to my belt, pulling me closer. “I’m tired of thinking.”

  I had to agree with her there. It was overrated by a million miles. All I did was think and plan and shuffle plans to make room for new ones. But I hadn’t been ready for her. I’d definitely never planned for her.

  I backed out of the bus and held up a finger. “Let me just grab the—”

  She followed me out, pushing me back as she plowed ahead. “It’s just some rain. I’ll help and we can get out of here.”

  I grabbed her hand and pulled her in close again. I didn’t want to stop touching her even to put away the lumber.

  She looped her arm around me and went on her toes. The rain starred her lashes, making her eyes look even bigger. Her mouth and the skin around it was red from our impromptu make-out session. I brushed my thumb along the abraded skin.

  She caught my hand. “Don’t give me that look.”

  “I marked the hell out of you.”

  “Good. I’ll remember it longer.”

  She was stunning and wanted to be mine—even for a moment. I lifted her up and she laughed, wrapping her legs around me. “What about the—”

  I gripped her ass and lifted her enough to get to my mouth. The wind was whipping up, scattering her hair around our faces. It was cold as hell, but it didn’t matter. I just wanted more of her.

  She shook back her hair with a laugh and hung onto my shoulders. “You’re crazy.”

  “You make me crazy.” I kissed her again and ignored the pile, detouring to my truck.

  “No, wait. I gotta finish the bus while you’re back in the city.” Her laughter slid away as she linked her hands around my neck. Her gaze was unflinching. “We have all day.”

  Not really. I should be attending a business dinner this evening—one of many that I was supposed to make an appearance at this weekend.

  She blew her wet bangs out of her eyes. “Unless you have to go.”

  “No. I can stay.” Not the right answer, but maybe for once, it really needed to be. I could take one day for myself and this unpredictable woman.

  She lowered a leg and I gently set her down. “We’ll get it done faster if we do it together.” She ran back to the things I’d left outside.

  I followed her and we made quick work of the tools and lumber, playing an interesting game of Tetris as we stacked all of it into the bus. As we worked, the wind whipped even harder and sleet stung my cheeks.

  She didn’t complain, but she was only wearing a vest. I took off my flannel and wrapped it around her. “Get in the truck, I’ll get the rest.”

  Her teeth were chattering so hard that she didn’t argue with me for once. As she ran for the truck, I got the sawhorses inside the bus, locked it up, and then ran to close up the barn.

  My thermal was sticking to me by the time I got to the truck. Thankfully, she’d noticed the keys were in the center console and had started it up, hopefully blasting the heater.

  The wind was roaring through the pines as I climbed in, slamming my door from the force of the gale. “Holy shit.”

  She tried to shrug off my shirt, but I shook my head. “You’re only wearing a vest.”

  “You’re soaked to the skin.”

  “I’ll warm up in a second.” I held up my hands to the vents. She didn’t disappoint and had turned everything on max.

  She cupped her hands close to her mouth, the ends of my shirt sleeves hiding half her face. “This is nuts.”

  “The storm came out of nowhere.”

  Her eyes crinkled with a smile behind the flannel. “Kinda like us.”

  I turned to her. “You can still change your—”

  She covered my mouth with flannel-clad fingers. “Stop trying to change my mind.” She leaned over to me. “Or are you trying to change yours?”

  I took her hand and pulled it over to my zipper. “There’s no changing my mind. I’m hard as hell while the rest of me is an ice cube, for fuck’s sake.”

  She dragged the back of her knuckles along my zipper. “Then why do you keep asking me?”

  “Because I want you too much.”

  The confession surprised both of us. She drew in a quick breath. “Show me.”

  I nodded and let her go, putting the truck into gear. The ride up to her place was silent save for the sound of my windshield wipers. The sleet had given way to fat snowflakes, turning the trail into a scene from a snow globe.

  When I parked, we just sat there for a moment. She looked at me, then down at her hidden hands. She seemed impossibly small in my flannel.

  She reached up to pull her wet hair into a tail over her shoulder. “We should go in.”

  I nodded. The minute I got out of the truck, we’d be different. Even if this happened just this once, I knew in my bones there would be no going back.

  “Okay, well…” She opened the door and slid out. The red plaid flowed around her in the wind like a cape. “Don’t make me wait.” She slammed the door and ran for her cabin.

  Quickly, I pulled out my phone and sent off a text to Ransom, informing him we’d leave later, then shut it off. I didn’t want to hear his bitching.

  Or to realize just how many responsibilities I was blowing off.

  I got out of the truck and flew up the steps to her door. I let myself in, minding the floor to make sure there was no kitten catastrophes. Gary was too busy snoozing away on the club chair.

  I found her vest draped on the back of the couch. She’d turned on a light by the stairs and her boots were neatly tucked against the wall of the bottom stair. Her shirt was in a pile a few steps up. I grabbed it as I climbed the stairs.

  Music floated down to me—acoustic guitars with a raspy male voice I vaguely recognized. Her jeans were in a puddle in the middle of the hallway at the top of the stairs. One helluva trail of breadcrumbs.

  Thin, watery light beckoned me closer to the door at the end of the hall. I stayed just beyond the threshold as I looked in. Two large windows made up the corner of the small room. A queen-sized bed was set in front of it. The room was too small for a large bed frame, instead she’d created a canopy of lights out of an old iron four-poster with some sheer material.

  It was decidedly feminine and romantic. A plethora of pillows made up the top of the bed, and the rest was neatly made with a few smaller blankets draped along the bottom in the frilly style some women used to decorate a space.

  The sleet had turned into full-blown snow outside, swirling around the swaying birch trees outside her property. I shifted to find her in the doorway to the connecting bathroom. Her hair was down around her shoulders, and she was wearing my flannel shirt.

  Just my flannel shirt.

  “Damn.”

  She smiled and came toward me. “Too forward?”

  “Nope. Just right.” I met her in the middle of the room and trailed my finger down the deep vee of the shirt to find she’d only done up a few of the buttons.

  She looked up at me, her lips parting as I skimmed the tips of my fingers along the worn shirt to the tight tip of one nipple pushing against the soft red plaid. She drew in a sharp breath as I flicked a button open, then another.

  I parted the fabric, revealing her collarbone then the slope of one breast. I lowered my mouth to follow the trail of my fingers to the water-soft curve of her breast. I traced the pink edge of her nipple with my thumb before taking it in my mouth.

  She slipped her fingers into my hair, holding me close. I tugged at the last button and filled my other hand with her naked hip. She seemed fragile in the pale light from the snowy day and the soft glow of her bedroom.

  I stood up straight, but I couldn’t stop touching her. She nibbled on her lower lip and her eyes fluttered shut as I cupped her breasts, my thumbs lightly brushing each tip.

  She swayed and braced herself on my belly. “Clay.”

  I knelt in front of her, parting the flannel to get to all of her. She tried to step back, but I held her still. “Shh.”

  She toyed with one of my curls. “The bed is over there.”

  “It’ll wait.” I slid one hand around her back to the curve of her ass and drew her close enough to kiss her belly. Her skin was still cool, but it warmed as I kissed and tasted her fragile flesh.

  She was so pale I could trace the light map of veins under her skin, drawing me lower and closer to where I wanted to be.

  She sifted her fingers through my hair. “This isn’t the way we start a wall banger sex-a-thon. I don’t need you to be gentle with me.”

  “Everyone needs a warm-up.” I lowered my mouth to the delicate skin of her inner thigh. Blackberry and jasmine mixed with her unique scent, doing my head in. I wanted to lay her out and devour her, but the more intense side of me wanted to stretch this out as long as possible.