After saying his prayers, he’d briefly wondered if his mom would even care, and then waited for the light or whatever the hell was supposed to come for him. Next thing he knew, a medic was dragging him through the sand. “It hurts like a son of a bitch, I know.” The blast through his flesh had seared his body with a burning pain he’d never forget. “But it’ll heal. Over time. And you’ll—”

  “You made it!” Tess came charging over the crest of the hill on Dreamer’s back, her hair flying in the wind. “How’d it go? How’d Legacy do?” She halted Dreamer and dismounted. “I mean, it’s a good sign she was able to walk that distance. Has she seemed okay?”

  “She’s been a trooper.” He ran his hand up and down Legacy’s muzzle. The key to forgetting sex with Tess was to never look directly into the woman’s eyes. Or to stand too close to her. Or to touch her in any way, shape, or form. One touch and he’d be a goner. “She even stopped to drink a few times. Though I haven’t been able to get her to eat anything.”

  “We’ll work on that.” Tess slipped her hands beneath the horse’s chin groove and slightly lifted Legacy’s head to inspect the gunshot wound in her nose. “Still looks pretty clean. But we should flush it out a few times a day so there’s no bacteria buildup.”

  “I can help out.” He and Legacy did have a bond, after all. Now the horse knew his secret. And he knew how it felt to be displaced the way she would have to be for a while.

  “That would be great. I could use the help with her.” Tess took Dreamer by the bridle and they walked in the direction of the lower pastures. “I’ve got the large pen at the edge of the meadow all cleared out for her. I figure she needs some space. She’s not too used to fences and I don’t want her to feel too confined.”

  “Good.” He tried to think of something else to say but being with Tess alone made it hard to think at all. “How long do you think we’ll have to keep her penned up?” That wasn’t a totally ridiculous question.

  “It depends.” Tess didn’t seem to be her usual talkative self either.

  “I guess until I’m confident there won’t be an infection,” she said after a pause. “When she’s in the clear, we can transport her back to the high meadow.” Her tone was all business, not soft and husky like it had been when she’d asked him to take her upstairs to his hotel room at the party. “Hopefully she’ll be able to rejoin her herd.”

  They reached the fence and Tess pulled open the gate. “In you go.”

  Silas unhooked the lead rope and prodded the hesitant horse into the pen.

  Legacy stood straighter, seeming to take in her surroundings. She ambled to the fence and then trotted the whole perimeter of the pen as though searching for a way out.

  “It’s only temporary.” He caught up to the horse and patted her flank. “We need to watch out for you. This is the best way.”

  “I’m going to give her some more meds.” Tess hurried to a UTV that was parked near the pen. “Hopefully we can keep her calm enough. I don’t want her getting too agitated with a potential concussion.”

  Silas faced the horse and petted her muzzle while Tess administered a few more shots. “That’s it. All done.”

  “Told you she’s a trooper.” The horse had hardly flinched, even with all of those needles.

  The woman eyed him, her expression unreadable. “She seems to really respond to you.”

  “I have a way with women.” He’d meant it as a joke but Tess instantly turned away from him and cleared her throat. “Um… I’m sure you’re starving. I made some sandwiches. They’re in the house.”

  Yeah, he couldn’t go into her house. He couldn’t seem to say the right things around her. The last thing he wanted was to make her uncomfortable.

  He should’ve thought of that before he slept with her.

  Tess glanced at him over her shoulder, waiting for an answer.

  “That’s all right. I’m not hungry,” he lied. “I should get back to the office anyway, check in with Aiden.” Thatch was probably back by now too. Maybe they actually had some work to do. “We had a bunch of bids we were supposed to hear back on today, so I’d better catch up and get some work done.”

  “Oh.” Tess stopped to wait for him. “Okay. If you’re sure.” She opened the gate that led to the driveway. “But you’re coming to the police station with me, right?”

  “Yeah.” He couldn’t back out on his promise to help her now. “We can head over there after I stop by the office. Come and get me when you’re ready to go.”

  “Sounds good.” They parted ways and Tess veered off to jog up the steps to her porch.

  Easing out a long sigh, Silas turned left and pushed through the Cowboy Construction doors. Both Aiden and Thatch were there but neither one of them appeared to be actually working.

  “We were wondering where you were.” Thatch aimed a dart at the board on the other side of the room. He was always working on his aim. Usually to no avail.

  “Tess had a situation.” Silas went directly to his desk and told them about what had happened in the high meadow.

  “Why’d she ride up there today?” Aiden stood in front of the sink at the minibar washing out a mug. “She usually goes on the weekends.”

  Silas almost wished he hadn’t known why she’d been to the high meadow this morning. His throat got all tight and achy. “She was up there visiting the memorial. It’s May 12.”

  “Shit. I completely forgot.” Aiden dried the mug and set it on the shelf above the coffeepot.

  “Me too.” Thatch tossed another dart, narrowly missing the board. And that was why he could never beat Silas.

  Silas never missed.

  “I didn’t realize the date until she told me.” All of the days had started to run together in his head ever since Tess had turned his world upside down. He found himself thinking about her when he was supposed to be working. He found himself thinking about her when he was trying to fall asleep. And, yes, he was thinking about her right now while he was talking to her brother.

  “How’d she seem?” Aiden sat at his desk but didn’t open his laptop.

  Silas shrugged. “She felt bad because she forgot it was their anniversary until she heard the date on the news.” Was that really why Tess had felt bad about spacing on the date, or did her guilt have more to do with what had happened between them?

  “Man. I remember when she’d start shutting down weeks before her anniversary.” Aiden balled up some of the papers that had been sitting on his desk for the better part of two weeks and tossed them into the trash can. “But it’s good she forgot. That means she’s moving on.”

  Thatch plucked the darts out of the board. “Yeah, she’s seemed different these last few weeks.”

  “Different?” Silas’s head shot up. “What’d you mean?” Were they messing with him? Did they know? Surely they didn’t know about him and Tess.

  “I don’t know…” Thatch gave him a funny look. “She seems to be smiling more, I guess. I’ve even heard her humming a few times. I guess she seems a little happier than she used to be.”

  “Yeah,” Aiden agreed. “It’s like she’s letting go a little bit.”

  In Silas’s estimation, Tess didn’t seem thrilled about letting go of Jace. She’d seemed sad. But he didn’t want to talk about Tess anymore. He couldn’t risk Aiden and Thatch seeing through him. “So have we heard back on any of the bids we put out last week?”

  “Not yet.” Thatch had resumed his dart throwing, clearly not concerned about work at all.

  “Well, why aren’t you staying on top of them?” he demanded, looking back and forth between his friends. “Check in, see if we’re getting the job. We can’t just hang out playing darts all the time.”

  “I’ve checked in.” Aiden looked up from cleaning out his desk drawer. “You know how our business works. Sometimes there’re a ton of jobs and sometimes we’re waiting on jobs. That’s how it’s always been. What’s your problem anyway?”

  “Nothing.” Nothing they could help him with. He needed work to keep him busy, that was all. To keep his mind off Tess.

  “You’ve been an ass for weeks now.” Aiden pointed at him. “Come to think of it, you’ve been an ass ever since my engagement party.”

  “What’re you talking about? No, I haven’t.” He looked to Thatch for backup, but their friend nodded along.

  “Yeah. You have seemed a little distracted,” Thatch said. “What happened that night? I know you hooked up with someone. What’s the problem? Now she won’t call you back or something?”

  “No!” He shot to his feet. “Why would you think I’d hook up with someone?” How the hell did these two know?

  “For one thing, you disappeared and no one saw you until noon the next day.”

  Yeah, Silas hadn’t felt like going back to the party after Tess had left his room.

  Aiden’s eyes narrowed. “And for another… because you’re you and you hook up with women all the time.”

  Right. But this time had been different. This time the woman had been Tess.

  “Also, I heard you talking to someone in your hotel room after I got back to mine.” Thatch shot him a triumphant grin. “So you can’t deny it.”

  Silas shook his head and opened up his email before they could continue their interrogation. Aiden and Thatch knew him better than anyone else. Sometimes even better than himself.

  “If it’s not a woman, what the hell is wrong with you?” Aiden got out of his chair and stood directly in front of Silas’s desk. “And don’t bother saying ‘nothing’ again. You can’t lie to us.”

  “You could try but we’d know,” Thatch added.

  They’d never leave him alone unless he gave them something. So he went with the decoy. “I guess I’ve been thinking a lot, that’s all.”

  “Thinking.” Thatch sent another dart flying, this time hitting the bull’s-eye.

  “Yeah.” Silas came around and sat on the edge of his desk next to Aiden. He’d have to tread lightly here. He knew Aiden and Thatch as well as they knew him. They weren’t going to like him going on a mission like this without them. “Don’t you guys miss having a higher purpose? I mean, we hardly have anything to do around the ranch anymore and our construction business is in kind of a lull at the moment.”

  “You mean do I miss dodging bullets in deserts?” Aiden gave a disgusted shake of his head. “No. Actually, I’m pretty grateful to be here in one piece.” His weighted tone reminded Silas that not all of them had come back.

  As if he could ever forget they’d had to leave Jace behind.

  “Is this about money?” Thatch sent another dart flying at the board, but this one missed the mark and put another hole in the drywall. “Because we can do some advertising to bring in more business. I have contacts in Jackson…”

  “It’s not about money.” Silas paced to the putting green and ripped a putter out of the stand. They all got plenty in retirement and hardly spent anything living around here. His investments would be enough to keep him comfortable for the long term. “I’m talking about having a focus.” A focus he hadn’t seemed to get back since that night with Tess. He’d been restless, torn, guilt-ridden, but that hadn’t stopped him from thinking about her… from wanting her.

  “You want a focus?” Aiden walked back to his desk and sat in the chair. “Maybe you should try sticking with the same woman longer than one night. Trust me. Your whole perspective changes when you make a commitment.”

  Silas shared a look with Thatch. With his newfound happiness, Aiden had recently become a regular relationship guru.

  “I’m serious, you two.” He went on wisely. “Sharing your life with someone does give you a higher purpose.”

  “This from the man who once snuck out a woman’s window while she was getting ice cream from the freezer.” Silas couldn’t resist. He was happy for Aiden and Kyra, but one successful relationship didn’t mean the man suddenly knew everything.

  “Hey, I’m the first one to admit I wasn’t always into commitment. But everything changes when you meet the right person.”

  Thatch made a gagging noise.

  His thoughts exactly.

  Aiden ignored them. “Maybe this woman who has you all messed up is the right person.” He shot Silas a knowing glare. “She obviously got to you.”

  Damn. And they were right back on the road to Tess.

  “Who is she anyway?” Thatch pestered. “Someone you met at the party?”

  “There’s no woman.” No woman he could tell them about anyway. Aiden would lose his shit if he realized Silas had been anywhere near Tess. Thatch would get all annoying and probably remind him he had no business hooking up with their dead best friend’s wife. “I just… feel like I need more. More challenges. More opportunities.” More distractions.

  “Why don’t you go on vacation?” Aiden suggested. “Take a few weeks off in some exotic place. Go deep-sea diving, cliff jumping, whatever you need to do to get your adrenaline rush, and then come back?”

  “Maybe,” Silas mumbled. But unfortunately, he couldn’t leave tomorrow. Not when Tess was counting on him to help with Legacy.

  CHAPTER FIVE

  Tess stood behind the curtain in the living room and peeked out the window. She wasn’t spying, exactly. More like… watching the Cowboy Construction office door to see if Silas had changed his mind about the sandwiches. Seriously. She’d invited the man inside her house for food and he’d turned her down.

  Ugh. Would things ever go back to normal between them? She moved the curtain into place again and walked into the kitchen where a platter of beautiful roast beef and Asiago sandwiches still sat, untouched. It used to be that she and Silas could joke around. Some might have even called the banter between them flirting, though it had always been harmless. But now… she kept overanalyzing everything. Was he upset with her? Annoyed? Did he feel like they’d betrayed Jace too?

  The front door opened, and her heart stuttered to a stop.

  Aiden cruised into her house with a breezy hello. “Oh, sandwiches. Yum.” He sauntered to the kitchen island and helped himself to three. “I’m starving. Keep forgetting to stock the office refrigerator.”

  “Glad I could help.” Tess pulled two glasses out of the cabinet and poured them each some iced tea. So, the cowboys didn’t have any food in their fridge and yet Silas still wouldn’t come in here and have a late lunch with her…

  “Hey, I’m sorry I didn’t come by this morning,” Aiden said around a mouthful of sandwich. “I didn’t realize today was the twelfth. I should’ve remembered.”

  With all he had going on—and a new engagement—it wasn’t surprising he hadn’t. “It’s fine. I don’t expect everyone to swarm over here the second they wake up in the morning.” A year ago, Aiden had been on her doorstep first thing. He’d made her coffee and had seen her off on her ride. But this year… everything was so different. He was different. She was different too. And she wasn’t sure what grief was supposed to look like two years out. After Jace had passed away, her heart had gone dark, along with all of her sensual desires. And then the wrong man had woken them both.

  Her brother stopped eating and set his sandwich on the paper towel. “It’s okay you forgot the date, Sis. You know that, don’t you?”

  It didn’t feel okay. She didn’t feel okay about forgetting at all. “What else am I going to forget?” That’s what really haunted her. “Will I forget the sound of his laugh? Will I forget how he’d look at me first thing in the morning, when his eyes were all droopy and sleepy and he had a lazy smile on his lips?” Would the countless memories of the moments they’d shared all start to fade with time? She closed her eyes, trying to see her husband’s face. “I don’t want to forget.”

  When she opened her eyes, Aiden looked at her sadly, the corners of his mouth drooping with empathy. “You won’t forget the best parts of Jace because those things are part of you. They’re part of your story, Tess. And no one forgets the best parts of their story.”

  “Today, when I realized I’d forgotten our anniversary, I felt like I was losing him again.” She put her hand over her mouth to hold in a sob. She’d just started to feel like she was making real progress—that she was not only living but also enjoying life again—and then this reality she’d never asked for came barreling into her again and knocked her backward.

  “Maybe you shouldn’t look at it like you forgot,” her brother suggested. “Maybe you should think of this as a sign that you’re ready to add a new chapter to your story. Jace would want you to add new chapters. You know that as well as I do.”

  “Wow.” Tess raised her eyebrows at the sudden role reversal. What happened to her being the one who always got to impart the wisdom? “Kyra is really rubbing off on you, huh?”

  “I just never knew.” Her brother’s eyes were positively shiny with the light of new love. “I never understood how someone—the right someone—could make me want to be better, to be healthier and stronger and more understanding and more perceptive so I can give her the best of myself. She’s it for me.”

  Based on that speech, Tess would agree. “And you’re it for her.” And in the fall, they would get married and build a beautiful new life together. Tears built in her eyes. Happy tears, sad tears. Tears of longing. Tears of heartache over what she’d lost. Her emotions hadn’t been cut and dry since Jace had died. They’d all blurred together. “You know when you’ve found the right person. That’s for sure.” She’d known with Jace even though she’d only been sixteen years old.

  “That’s exactly what I was trying to tell Silas.” Aiden went back to eating his sandwich. “That being with the right person can give you a higher sense of purpose.”

  At the mention of Silas’s name, Tess stood up. “Really?” She could feel her face flushing—the heat, the mad rush of blood—so she turned to the sink to wash the dishes. “You and Silas were talking about relationships?” Damn it, her voice went too high. She had to be cool.