My body is coiled so tight, I feel like I’m going insane with the need to come. But I’m not going first. I want her to get off again and then I’ll follow.

  Slipping a hand free, I drop it between her legs. Rubbing the pad of my thumb over her clit shocks Jess, and she loses her rhythm.

  Which is fine by me, I can’t wait any longer.

  Sitting up, I wrap my arms around her and roll her to her back. She’s barely flat before my hips are pumping into her.

  “Yes,” she whispers, giving credence to the force by which I’m fucking her compared to the slow, sensual dance she was doing on me.

  “Need you to come, JJ,” I murmur, resting my forehead against hers.

  “I’m close,” she gasps as I thrust hard. She spreads her legs, wraps them around my waist, and bucks against me.

  “Get there with me, baby.” I push a hand between our bodies and rub her clit as I tunnel into her.

  To my satisfaction, she goes first, but not by much. She stiffens, cries out into my shoulder, and I can feel her contract all around my cock. It sends me over the edge as I slam into her one last time.

  I drop down onto her, wrap my arms around her as tight as I can without hurting her, and I empty myself violently. Every fucking drop, I feel like I’m melting right into her. Becoming more a part of her than I ever knew was possible.

  “I love you, JJ.” I press my lips to her neck, my body still shuddering with spasms of pleasure.

  “I love you,” she says softly. “So much.”

  CHAPTER 14

  Jessica

  For someone who has a deadly Russian psychopath after her, I feel amazing. And yes, it has everything to do with the change in my relationship with Dozer. Finally, after years of us being afraid to realize what we were truly meant to be, we’re there.

  Almost.

  There’s a small part of me that wonders if Dozer is fully committed to this idea of us being a couple. Obviously, we need to talk more about our future. For instance, we live in different states. Someone will need to move, but I’m open about that.

  There’s just something I can’t quite put my finger on that still has him holding what feels like a secret in reserve. Is it a general unease over this Borovsky situation? Maybe he can’t put his full attention on our future until this is buttoned up?

  That could be it, but I feel like he knows information I don’t, even though he swears I know everything he does. Last night while we lay exhausted in each other’s arms, we talked about the hunt for Borovsky. I learned nothing more than what he’d already shared, but I guess I need the continual reassurance. As it stands, my family and I are officially in hiding from a crazed killer. I’m sure that’s got Dozer a little off-kilter.

  I’m choosing not to worry about those things, though. We’re safe. Dozer loves me, and I love him, all in a very new way, but in the way we both want to be. There’s nothing but good things coming our way.

  “I’m heading out,” I call to my mom before opening the apartment door. I decided to make use of the gym facilities here on the fourth floor. I worked out regularly in Miami and haven’t been able to do so since we left.

  “See you in a bit,” my mom says. She and Thea have plans to bake with Joslyn a little later, which I appreciate. Joslyn is an incredibly busy woman. She still maintains her career as an actress and musician, but she is very careful to pick only the best projects, and she commits to nothing that will take her away from Kynan for long. She doesn’t do anything back-to-back but takes a lot of time off in between. However, I know she’s currently studying a script for a film she’ll be doing soon, so for her to take time to make us feel not only welcome but entertained here is beyond touching. She’s an amazing soul.

  I make my way to the gym. I luckily packed some workout gear, and I’m sporting a pair of gray leggings and an old University of Miami T-shirt that’s seen better days.

  Just as I’m about to enter the glass door already propped open, a man’s voice stops me in my tracks.

  “It’s a pretty dangerous mission, and we’re all worried about Dozer.”

  Apprehension scurries up my spine like a spider at the mention of Dozer’s name. The voice I recognize as Kellen’s comes from inside the gym, and when I don’t hear anyone respond, I gather he’s talking on the phone.

  “I’m not sure when I’ll be able to make it out there, but I’m hoping they’ll solidify the plan today so I’ll know for sure by tonight.”

  I backpedal, not needing to hear anymore. I’ve learned in those few sentences that there’s an actual mission being planned, and Dozer is going to be an active participant. Worst of all, it’s dangerous. The tone in Kellen’s voice tells me it’s the type of danger that could mean death.

  What in the hell is going on? Surely, Dozer wouldn’t…

  And then it hits me.

  That’s the thing I haven’t been able to put my finger on. He knows something he’s not telling me, and now I get why he wouldn’t tell me if it’s dangerous for him.

  Fear and worry dissipate, immediately replaced by hot anger that he would dare make a plan of action—one that could kill him—and not involve me. This is my life too—he’s my life—and I have a right to add my input.

  I spin on my heel, no longer wanting to work out but expend my pent-up fear in a different way.

  Hopefully one that involves me kicking Dozer’s ass.

  I take the floating staircase two steps at a time. We were given the grand tour of Jameson when we arrived, including Dozer taking us down into his R&D lab. I remember the elevator was on the second floor and the general direction, but if I have to tear this place apart to find him, I will.

  I’m slightly disoriented when I reach the second floor, but then I remember the perimeter glass offices and desks in the middle where agents sit. And in the far northwest corner is a tiny, hall-like alcove where an elevator leads down to R&D.

  I start toward it with long, purposeful strides. I don’t bother looking around or making eye contact with anyone as I am on a mission of my own. Ironic that I’m worried about Dozer being in danger, and yet he’s in serious danger from me right now.

  Not that I’d ever physically hurt him, but he’s going to get a sharp and bitter piece of my mind.

  “Jess,” calls Bebe from behind, and while I want to ignore her, I know I can’t.

  I stop and turn to face her. She jogs to catch up with me, takes one look at my expression, and call it women’s intuition or whatever, but she knows I know what’s up and that I’m going to rain holy hell upon Dozer.

  “Where is he?” I ask when she reaches me. “And don’t even think to dissuade me—”

  “I won’t,” she promises, taking my elbow. “I’ll take you down myself, but you need to calm down a little.”

  “Don’t tell me to calm down,” I exclaim furiously, pulling my arm away from her. “Do you know what that fool is planning to do?”

  “Yes,” she replies, and before I can chastise her since she’s his closest friend here and should’ve stopped it, she says, “And I’m adamantly opposed to it. I’ve tried to talk sense into him, but he’s not listening.”

  “Oh,” I say, my voice lower and some of the steam evaporating. “What exactly is the plan?”

  Her eyes widen. “I thought you knew. Isn’t that why you’re coming down here looking for him?”

  “I only know that there’s a plan, it’s dangerous, and it involves Dozer. I overheard Kellen speaking to someone on the phone.”

  “Oh,” Bebe murmurs, and I can see her brain whirring. She has a duty to Jameson and their overall mission. She knows she probably shouldn’t be discussing plans or secrets with me, but I’m sure she’s torn because whatever is going down, she’s not in agreement with it.

  “Bebe.” Her name is soft on my lips, and I plead with my eyes. “What is he going to do?”

  Bebe jerks her head toward the elevator, and we walk that way. It’s not until we’re in the alcove but before she pushes the button that she turns to me. “The gist of the plan is that Dozer is going to let Borovsky’s men capture him and—”

  “He’s going to do what?” I shriek. Realizing I sound like a crazy woman who no one will take seriously, I steady my voice. “Get captured? You mean killed. What in the hell is he thinking?”

  “We’re not going to let him get killed,” she assures me. “I’ve perfected some tech—”

  “No offense, Bebe—and I know Dozer loves you and your brain—but there is no amount of tech I will trust with his life. He’s not built for this stuff. He’s a researcher and a scientist. He’s not a secret agent.”

  “He’s not without skills,” she says mulishly. “He’s trained hard for the past year.”

  I cross my arms back over my chest. “Oh, now you want him to go.”

  “No.” She rubs her temples in frustration. “I don’t want him to go, just like I don’t want Griff to ever put himself in danger. But it is part of the job, and I have to trust it will turn out okay. If I didn’t, I couldn’t work here.”

  “I’m sorry. But I don’t trust you all to protect him. Too much can go wrong. He’s too important to me.”

  “I get that,” she attempts to reassure me.

  “How could you? You have no clue how we feel about each other and—”

  “Yes, I do. I had a long talk with Dozer today about you. How things have changed. How he’s silly, madly in love with you. I know exactly what you mean to him and vice versa. So you should understand, he has to do this. He has to be the one to protect you because you’re his to protect.”

  Tears well in my eyes. Her words are exactly what I needed to hear, but at the same time, I hate hearing them. “I’ll never forgive myself if something happens to him.”

  “You’d never be at fault if—”

  “I would,” I insist. “I’m the one who started a relationship with a madman. And when I discovered he’d murdered someone, I’m the one who went to the police. I should’ve left it alone. Broken up with him and gone on my way. Instead, I made a target of myself and my family, and now Dozer. This is all my fault.”

  “No!” Bebe exclaims, grabbing me by the shoulders and surprising me with a little shake. “This is Ivan Borovsky’s fault. He’s the only one to blame in this. Now, I get you’re mad and worried, but you need to get past that. This is going to happen, with or without your consent.”

  That raises my hackles. I really like Bebe. Respect the hell out of her, and she’s going to be dear to me because she’s dear to Dozer. But she doesn’t have the right to tell me to give up on talking Dozer out of this. I have the right to be involved.

  “I need to talk to him,” I say calmly. “Will you please take me down?”

  Bebe stares at me a long moment, perhaps calculating whether to protect Dozer from me. She makes a decision, though, and hits the elevator button. “I don’t need to take you down. Just knock on the door, and Dozer will let you in.”

  “Thank you,” I say, the words coming out stiff and reserved. But then something washes through me… a breath or two where I know that if I want a life with Dozer, I take his entire life. Bebe is part of that life.

  I step into her and hug her hard. She stiffens for a second and then gives me a halting hug back. “Don’t be too hard on him. He’s only doing this because he loves you.”

  “Makes me wish he didn’t love me,” I grumble. “At least he’d be safe.”

  “And you’d be without true love, which is not fair either.”

  “Touché,” I reply and step into the elevator.

  Bebe smiles once more and turns on her heel as the doors slide shut and I descend to the R&D division.

  The facilities where Bebe and Dozer do their research and develop new technology looks like Shuri’s lab straight out of Black Panther. It’s one of Dozer’s favorite movies, and I assume he used it as inspiration since this area has been recently built and outfitted with all kinds of tech gadgetry.

  Through the glass doors, I see Dozer at his elevated desk, sitting on a stool and tinkering with a small black box using a screwdriver and a soldering kit. My, how far he’s come since his days working at NASA, and yet, I know without a doubt he’d say his work here is far more important and fulfilling.

  I rap on the glass with my knuckles and he jumps, looking back over his shoulder.

  When he sees me, at first his smile breaks wide.

  When he sees I’m not smiling back, his falters, melts, and then evaporates.

  With a sigh—yes, he knows why I’m here based on my expression—he reaches over to his keyboard and with a few taps, the door unlocks with an audible snick.

  I step inside and before the door closes behind me, I lay into him. “How could you even think about doing something so stupid?”

  “Bebe ratted me out?” he guesses.

  “No, actually.” Although technically, she filled in the details I didn’t know, so in a way, she did. But I got my girl’s back. “I overheard someone else talking about it.”

  Dozer snarls in frustration and scrubs a hand against his jaw. “I was going to tell you, but not until we were absolutely sure we’d be able to try it.”

  “How could you even think it’s a good idea to offer yourself up as bait? Borovsky will kill you. And he’ll torture you before that.”

  I don’t think it’s the words as much as my attitude, but Dozer flies off his stool to me and cups his hands around my face, bending close so we’re almost nose to nose. “How could you think I’d stand by and do nothing? Waiting for him to come kill you is not an option. We can’t keep you cooped up in here forever. For fuck’s sake, JJ… I want to start a life with you, and we can’t do that until this asshole is taken care of.”

  “You want to start a life with me?” I ask, unable to control the dreamy tone. It’s something I’ve hoped for the last few days since things changed between us, but it’s never been the right time to talk about it.

  “Of course, I want a life with you. I want everything with you and Thea. You’re my family, and I’m ready to get going on that. But we’ve got to make sure you’re safe.”

  “But we can be safe right here,” I insist. “Holed up together at Jameson until he’s caught.”

  “And what if that takes weeks? Months? How long are you willing to disrupt your life? You want to keep Thea locked up as if she’s in a prison?”

  “Of course not,” I say, wrapping my hands around his wrists and pulling his arms away from me. “But I’d like to give the police an honest chance of catching him.”

  Dozer shakes his head. “Their resources are tapped. Their informants know he’s in Miami, but his whereabouts are closely guarded by the higher-ups in the organization. There are orders to hunt you down and bring you in at all costs. There’s a huge bounty on your head, and it won’t let up until Borovsky is either captured or killed. Frankly… I’d prefer the latter.”

  “You don’t mean that,” I gasp.

  “I mean it, and I’d like to be the one to put him six under,” he rumbles fiercely.

  “Dozer,” I chastise, which he clearly doesn’t like. He spins away from me and then turns back. He appears to want to say something, but snaps his mouth shut.

  “What?” I implore, moving toward him. He steps away. “What’s wrong?”

  Dozer raises his hands as if he’s going to use them to explain himself, but instead they curl into fists and his lips draw flat against bared teeth. His voice is almost inhuman. “When I think of that monster touching you… of the things you had to go through after you went to the police… I just…”

  He doesn’t finish, but I know what he’s thinking. He’s never told me how he felt about it all, but I cried on his shoulder a few times after Borovsky was convicted. The guilt and shame I had from allowing Ivan to continue to touch me while the police solidified their case. It was self-preservation. I had no choice but to act normal, and that included letting him have sex with me.

  Even now, thinking about it, a shudder ripples up my spine, and I force the thoughts away. Dozer and I spent a beautiful night together last night, and those are the memories of sex and love and intimacy I want to have.

  I need Dozer to let these thoughts go. “It’s in the past, Dozer. I’ve moved on from it. I need you to as well, because if it continues to bother you, it’s going to keep it fresh for me.”

  “Christ.” Pulling me into his body, he wraps me in a cocoon of love and regret. “I’m sorry. I don’t mean to make you feel bad about any of it. You’re a survivor. You did the bravest thing I’ve ever seen anyone do, and you should be proud of every action and inaction you took with Borovsky to make sure he was punished for killing that family. I’ll let it go, I promise.”

  I’m soothed by his pact, and I hug him in return. “Good. Now, can we talk about this crazy idea of you going down there as bait?”

  Dozer pulls back. “Not an idea. A plan.”

  “No,” I snap angrily. “Not a plan. We need to talk this through.”

  “I’m doing it, JJ. I’m doing this for you and for us, and I trust my teammates. Nothing you can say will change my mind.”

  “If I told you I’ll hate you for doing it, would that change your mind?”

  “No, because at least you’d be safe once we take Borovsky down. If I lose you, it would be worth it.”

  I growl and smack his chest. “Of course, I wouldn’t hate you. I’d love you even more. But I’m so scared, Dozer. We just found each other.”

  “We’ve known each other for years,” he teases.

  I stare at him soberly, and his smile fades. “I’m really scared,” I repeat. “I can’t lose you.”

  “And you won’t,” he says before bending down to kiss me. “I promise.”

  “Okay,” I say, snuggling into him. I’m going to have to trust him that this is the right move.

  “There’s just one other thing, though,” Dozer says, and his tone causes the hair on my neck to stand on end.

  Leaning back, I look up at him. “What’s that?”

  “I need you, Thea, and your mom to leave. I want you to go to California with Kellen and—”