He drew her stiff body against him. He hated her choices…but he completely understood them. And now wasn’t the time to assure her that, no matter what, he would always be there to help her, hold her, pick up the pieces, and love her. After the way he’d treated her tonight, why would she believe him?

  Trees nudged the phone in Tessa’s direction. “I know this is tough…but you’ve got a new message.” Then the big guy turned to him with a grim expression, and Zy dreaded whatever his buddy planned to say next. “And I don’t have to tell you what app they’re using.”

  “Abuzz? Fuck.” He sighed. “That cocksucker. I reamed him out once. He just never fucking listens.”

  “Who?” Tessa’s hand shook as she took the phone and opened the app, looking terrified.

  “Phillip Garrett,” Trees helpfully supplied.

  Usually Zy hated to mention this relationship, but if he’d berated Tessa for keeping secrets, he couldn’t very well keep his own without being a fucking hypocrite.

  “The billionaire who owns Abuzz?” She didn’t seem to grasp why they were talking about him.

  “Yeah.” He sighed. “My dad.”

  Her eyes widened, then hope lit them. “Really? He could help us track down or pinpoint the location of the kidnapper keeping Hallie.”

  “The whole Tierra Caliente cartel has been using the app to communicate for months. I warned him once, and if it’s still going on, they’re paying him to look the other way. He won’t help. Dear ol’ Dad is more interested in making a buck than doing what’s right.”

  Trees nodded. “It’s one reason they don’t get along.”

  “One of many.”

  Tessa looked at him as if she barely knew him anymore. “You grew up with a billionaire?”

  He smiled tightly. “And the billion problems that go with that.”

  “And you never told me?”

  It wasn’t exactly the same thing…but she might have a point.

  He cleared his throat and stepped into problem-solving mode. Nothing mattered until they had Hallie back. “The kidnapper sent a new message? What does he want now?”

  She was almost afraid to find out.

  Her fingers trembled as she opened the DM. The account was a shell with a generic screen name, no picture, and no personal location. Nothing to help him identify who it might belong to. But given the slew of messages this person had sent over the last few days, whoever had set up this account was by no means inactive.

  Tessa scanned the screen, brows furrowing. “Something I don’t know how to give them.”

  What? Zy wrapped an arm around her again, mentally cursing when she stiffened at his touch. “Let me see. Let me help you. You’ve been dealing with this by yourself for too long, and I can—”

  “You can’t,” she screeched almost hysterically. “See for yourself.”

  When she shoved the phone into his hands, he scanned the demand—then wanted to throw the fucking phone across the room.

  Who is the mole leaking EM Security’s information to outsiders? You have twenty-four hours to provide information and proof or Hallie will pay with her life.

  Minutes later, Tessa wordlessly took Zy’s hand as he helped her from the bunker, then wrapped the blanket around herself tighter as she entered Trees’s place. She was relieved to finally have her oppressive secret out in the open. She was even more hopeful to have allies in saving her daughter. Incredibly grateful, too.

  But in every other way, she felt crushed by the ruthless side of Zy he’d shown her tonight.

  Would he ever forgive her?

  As soon as they entered the house, the men went into crisis-management mode. Huddled in one of the kitchen chairs, she shivered in the morning chill until Zy pulled her onto his lap and against his big, furnace-warm body. In the past, she would have taken his comfort happily. She would have basked in his affection, feeling so safe in his arms.

  Not anymore. The rage he’d directed at Tessa chilled her to the bone. She felt chastened and ashamed of what she’d done. She’d made every decision by following her motherly instinct to put her baby first. She’d hated that that meant sacrificing Zy. Obviously, he did, too. She didn’t want him warming her now out of pity.

  Tessa wriggled away from him. “Mind if I take a hot shower, Trees?”

  “Feel free. Down the hall, first door on the left. Towels are in the cabinet.”

  “Thanks.”

  Zy stood. “Do you need—”

  “Don’t worry about me. I’ll be fine.” She didn’t want him feeling obligated to do anything except help rescue Hallie.

  Tessa escaped to the bathroom, closing the door with a shaky sigh as she fought tears. It was warm and quiet here. She could get herself together. If they were going to save Hallie, she needed to gather her fortitude. She might need it as a shield against Zy’s wrath.

  A few minutes later, she was still seeking calm in the shower when he knocked. “Baby? I asked Trees to meet Madison somewhere between here and town so you’ll have a change of clothes. Anything in particular you want?”

  She was grateful he’d thought of that. “Just something warm. Thank you.”

  “Sure.”

  Tessa heard his footsteps retreat, then the two men exchanged a few unintelligible words. A door shut. Quiet descended.

  The rhythmic pelting of the shower spray on her back should have soothed Tessa. But reality kept its stranglehold on her. Another day had dawned without her baby. The man she’d given her heart to now thought of her as the enemy. The fact she’d only given away company secrets under the worst sort of duress didn’t matter. Until now, Zy hadn’t known why she’d done it, and when he’d discovered her deceit, he must have been shocked, baffled, and hurt. Horrified and angry, even. He obviously felt betrayed.

  His viciousness when he’d lashed back had cut her to the quick.

  Maybe she’d made a mistake in not telling him about Hallie’s abduction sooner, but her misstep had been borne out of fear. He’d responded by funneling his anger into contempt and done his absolute best to punish her with his words and his body.

  It’s the last fucking time I’m going to touch you.

  Shut up and fuck. That’s all we have left.

  I never expected you to look me in the face and smile while you stabbed me in the back.

  You destroyed us both, and now you have to live with it.

  Yes, he’d been less combative once he’d learned about Hallie’s plight. But she got the message loud and clear.

  They were done.

  I expected you to love me someday. I expected you to be my goddamn wife, let me be a father to Hallie, and to let me give you more children so we could spend fifty fucking years together.

  Tessa closed her eyes against more tears. She had been hoping for that, too. But she didn’t see how he could ever forgive her. And they would probably never come back from all the damage they’d sustained tonight.

  She turned off the hot spray and stepped out of the shower. Her body felt closer to human. The rest of her? A terrible jumble of anxiety, hurt, guilt, regret, and despair.

  God, she’d give anything to hold her daughter again, kiss Hallie’s downy head and hear her baby laugh. It nearly killed her to think she’d probably never do that again. After all, how could she possibly locate EM Security’s mole in less than a day when he and the bosses—professionals—had already been searching for months without an answer? The obvious response terrified her.

  She couldn’t.

  Tessa nearly broke down again.

  Through sheer will, she forced herself to towel off as Zy knocked. “I have a clean blanket if you want to wrap up in something before Trees returns with your clothes.”

  Not her first choice, but if she didn’t cover herself… Well, she’d experienced the outcome of that scenario less than an hour ago. Her battered heart might need a break from Zy, but her traitorous body craved the man. As good as she felt when he was inside her, he didn’t want her anymore except sexually. She couldn’t settle for just part of him, and it wasn’t smart to fall more in love with him just as he was falling out.

  With her towel wrapped securely in place, she opened the door a crack and took the blanket. “Thanks.”

  “Baby, we need to talk.”

  She draped the fresh quilt around her body, folded the towel, then stepped out of the bathroom, brushing past Zy and out of the too-narrow hallway, before she turned to him. “I don’t want to argue again. Not that I can keep up with you…”

  “I’m sorry.”

  For what, exactly? Setting a trap? Fucking her despite suspecting her of the worst? Tearing out her heart? She’d given him just cause to do all of that.

  She turned her back on him. “No, I’m sorry for giving you a reason to hate me. How long before Trees returns?”

  Because without clothes, when she stood this close to Zy, she felt entirely naked.

  “Tessa, I can’t hate you, baby. I know you’re worried as hell and scared. I know you feel alone in this, but—”

  “I am alone.” She faced him. “That bastard took my baby, the only person who loves me unconditionally.”

  “Tessa, I love—”

  “Stop. Just…don’t.” Why was he trying to make her feel better with lies? “You know, Cash is a lot of things. He’s flaky and insincere. He’s unreliable and selfish. He’s lazy, he’s dismissive, and he’s got a regrettable amount of charm, which I fell for in a stupid, weak moment. But I was never under any illusions about who he really was. But you had me dazzled from the beginning. So helpful, caring, polite, and kind. Protective and concerned. You even weren’t too macho to wear your heart on your sleeve. You’ve got a face made for seduction and a cock made for sin. The perfect man.” She sighed, fighting more useless tears. “But you didn’t even try to forgive me. You ended us without hesitation. Without even asking me why.”

  “Tessa, I…” Zy frowned like he wasn’t sure how to respond. No, like he didn’t know what to say to soothe her hurt. “It was my job to find out who was betraying EM. I assumed you were selling information for money. I was angry.”

  “And I hate that I let that bastard maneuver me into such a terrible position. I died a little inside every time I had to double-cross you. But what else could I do?”

  “I didn’t know what you had going on. You didn’t trust me with your problem. Baby, I could have—”

  “What? Mounted a rescue the enemy might have learned about before it went down? Then what? I’d be burying my baby. Zy, I’d never recover from that, and she deserves a life. Maybe someday you’ll understand and forgive me for not handling things the way you would have. Maybe not.” She shrugged. “But every time we spoke after Hallie was gone, I tried so hard not to hurt your feelings. And what did you do tonight the first chance you got?”

  “Everything I could to hurt you.” He dropped his head with a long sigh of regret, then slowly lifted his stare. “I fucked up. And I don’t have anything to offer you except my apology, my help, and my love.”

  He didn’t mean half of that, and she didn’t want to latch on to false hope. “Right now, I only need your help.”

  He swallowed like her words were a bitter pill. “You have that, no questions asked. We’ll talk about the rest once Hallie is safe.”

  That was for the best. They had less than twenty-four hours to solve a mystery no one had cracked in months. Somehow, they had to figure this out now. The yawning chasm of pain between them would have to wait.

  “If the mole isn’t Trees or me, who else can we look at?”

  “Inside EM? No one. Why don’t you sit at the table, baby? I don’t know if Trees has any tea, but I can make you coffee and breakfast.”

  Tessa didn’t think she could eat much now, and his offer felt too much like pity. “No, thanks.”

  “You’ve barely slept and you’re burning your candle. I know from experience that if you don’t fuel up, you’ll crash.”

  She couldn’t worry about herself now. She had a baby out there, in the clutches of strangers, who might as well have put a ticking time bomb in her innocent hands. But for some reason, he also had that stubborn, not-moving-an-inch look on his face. “Fine. Coffee and something small that takes less than two minutes to make.”

  He nodded as he settled a palm on the small of her back to usher her to the table. She drank in his touch. Ridiculous because it was merely a polite gesture, but she still savored it since this might be one of the last times he ever touched her.

  “Cream? Sugar?” Zy asked.

  “Lots of both. There’s a reason I don’t drink coffee.”

  Less than two minutes later, he brought her a steaming mug full of liquid that looked more creamy beige than black, along with a nutty, chewy protein bar that didn’t change her less-than-favorable opinion of prepackaged cardboard meals. But the coffee warmed her insides, and the bar perked her up.

  Zy brought his own to the table, his coffee steaming and black, and sat beside her with a sigh before he dug in. “Let’s start at the top. When Trees returns, he can help fill in any holes we may have missed. Maybe we’ll have a working theory by then.”

  She nodded, reaching for her phone, too terrified to let her only link with her child go. “It started last January, you said?”

  “The Friday before you left on maternity leave. What were you doing?”

  It had been a year ago. She didn’t remember exact details, but she recalled highlights. “The colonel and the guys got me a cake and tried to throw me a shower. Carlotta probably had a hand in it. Maybe Kimber, too. But neither was there. Um…Aspen was with us again that day. She’d been there off and on for almost a week. She wasn’t very good at anything she did, but she tried.”

  “We noticed that, too.” Zy frowned. “Who chose her to temporarily replace you and why?”

  “The local temp agency didn’t have anyone who fit the colonel’s checklist and wasn’t looking for a temp-to-perm arrangement. And he didn’t want to mislead anyone. I was talking to Cash about it one night after work, not long before he walked out. He suggested Aspen. He said he’d met her at his last job, waiting tables at some steakhouse along Highway Ninety. She was their bookkeeper. But the steakhouse was closing down, and he said Aspen only needed temporary work because she had another job lined up come April. It seemed perfect.”

  “My initial impression of Aspen had me thinking she wasn’t smart enough to plant any sort of spyware or remote-connect software on your computer, but maybe that was an act? Anyway, let’s say she installed it. That was exactly a year ago. It remained there until she left. Trees removed it just before your return. That would explain how the details of the March mission—”

  “The one where you were injured?”

  “Yeah. That may be how that info leaked and the op went south.”

  “But how would Aspen know anyone from a cartel?”

  Zy shrugged. “I don’t know. Let’s keep following this path and see if it leads us anywhere. She might be a mastermind, but she might also be just another pawn.”

  Tessa studied him, trying to focus purely on their discussion and the evidence, not the warmth of his body so close, not the way his stare lingered, not the memories of his hands on her…

  As heat climbed her face, she looked away. “What happened next?”

  “You came back, and every mission we undertook that wasn’t related to Tierra Caliente went off perfectly—until August twentieth. By then, Aspen was long gone. So was the tracking software. No one new had joined the crew. There should have been no way for that information to leak out.” Zy frowned and reached for her computer, the Gmail popping up immediately. “Who else had access to your laptop then, when Walker was first captured?”

  Tessa tried to think it through. “Everyone in the office, like usual.”

  He scanned the emails. “At three forty-six a.m.? You take your computer home most of the time…”

  Suddenly, the awful truth snapped into place. “Cash.”

  Zy sat up straighter. “He was living with you.”

  Tessa nodded. “And he had some weird job supposedly testing video games, of all things. He’d be up all night with his team or squad or whatever he called them. If he forgot to put his headphones on, I’d hear the gunfire whenever they stormed the bunker or took back the headquarters.”

  He frowned. “Testing video games?”

  “That’s what he said. It’s the perfect job for him. He likes to keep vampire hours. He likes to pretend to be all big and bad. He likes to expend as little effort as possible for his paycheck. But I couldn’t complain. He apparently got paid well and on time because he never missed making a payment to me.”

  “Tell me more about the video games.”

  “War-type games. Battlefields and soldiers and missions…”

  “No, I mean, did you ever see the names of these games? Did he talk about when they’d be released?”

  Why did it matter? “No. They all seemed the same to me, but they weren’t new games from what he said. And I never understood why any game manufacturer would pay someone like Cash to test a product they had already released to the public.”

  “They wouldn’t.”

  Of course not. It had been a lie. And now Tessa wished she’d questioned Cash more. “He was taking money from the cartel—to spy on EM with my computer?—and using his games to confuse me.”

  “That’s my theory. And if he and Aspen knew each other…”

  “Then…you’re thinking it was a coordinated effort?”

  “It’s logical.”

  It was. It was also conjecture—not the proof Hallie’s abductor wanted—but this was more theory than Zy’d had previously. They were getting somewhere. That gave her hope.

  “And the September mission to Mexico went off perfectly because—”

  “I left my computer locked up at the office. When I got the call about my dad from Kathleen, I ran out too quickly to even think of bringing it home, so it sat on my desk.”