‘Is you!’ chimed her three friends simultaneously.

  The Doctor grinned. ‘Right. Now let’s go and return these sunglasses to Audrey Hepburn.’

  Graham looked around at the sprawling studio complex. ‘We’ve got to find her first. Where do we start?’

  ‘We ask,’ said the Doctor. Locating one of the runners making his way through the crowds, she hurried forward to intercept him. ‘Excuse me!’

  The boy looked round. ‘Yes, miss?’

  ‘I’m wondering if you can help me. We’re trying to find out which stage they’re filming Breakfast at Tiffany’s. We’ve got something for Miss Hepburn.’

  ‘I’m sorry.’ The boy shook his head. ‘I’m not allowed to pass out information like that to members of the public.’

  ‘Quite right too. But we’re not members of the public.’ The Doctor pulled her wallet of psychic paper from her jacket pocket and presented it with a flourish. ‘Sarah Jane Smith, Senior Managing Director at Metropolitan Film Magazine. This is my sales and marketing team, Yaz, Ryan and Graham. We’re doing an exclusive editorial feature on the studio.’

  The boy stared wide-eyed at the Doctor’s virtual credentials.

  The Doctor leaned forward conspiratorially. ‘We’ve come over from London, England.’

  That, more than anything, seemed to galvanise the boy into action. ‘Right, miss. I’ll take you right there. Follow me.’

  As he set off across the backlot, the Doctor turned and grinned at her three friends. ‘Come on.’

  The interior of the soundstage was huge, dark and slightly musty smelling. Huge lights hanging from the ceiling illuminated a set of the interior of a New York apartment. Outside of that pool of light, people stood in quiet huddles watching as the director prepared to rehearse his actors.

  ‘That’s Blake Edwards,’ whispered Graham. ‘Looks like they’re about to shoot the party scene in Holly’s apartment.’

  ‘So what’s this film about?’ asked Ryan. ‘Why do you get so excited about it?’

  ‘Well, Audrey’s Holly Golightly, and she’s doing some dodgy stuff, and then she meets this new neighbour …’

  As Graham started to explain the basic plot, the Doctor regarded the director with amusement. With his close-cropped hair, and prominent ears, it was almost like looking back in time … A different body. A different Doctor. So long ago …

  The Doctor was pulled from her reverie by an excited gasp from Graham.

  ‘Oh, good lord, there she is.’

  She followed his gaze to where a slim, delicate woman was crossing the studio floor, surrounded by a phalanx of costume and make-up assistants. Immediately, the murmuring conversations fell quiet, and all eyes followed Audrey Hepburn as she made her way to the set. The Doctor was impressed. The ability to bring a room to a standstill like this was a rare gift. It was no wonder she was a star.

  Graham watched, entranced, as Audrey Hepburn began to rehearse the scene. Although initially interested, Yaz and Ryan swiftly started to grow impatient as the same actions were rehearsed over and over again, but they both had enough sense to realise that they needed to stay quiet and inconspicuous.

  The Doctor looked at the other people waiting quietly in the gloom around the edge of the studio. Bored-looking construction workers stood waiting for the next break in filming, make-up artists sat with bags bulging with cosmetics, ready to hurry onto the set if the need arose, men in suits watched proceedings with stern expressions, cigars clamped between their teeth.

  The Doctor was about to return her attention to the filming when movement in the shadows around the edge of the stage caught her eye. A diminutive figure was moving stealthily along the wall, its features shrouded by the hood of its jacket.

  Her curiosity piqued, the Doctor slipped away from her friends and began to follow the figure at a distance, determined to get a closer look. Its attention seemed to be directed at the filming going on in the centre of the stage. More specifically, it seemed to be concentrating on Audrey Hepburn.

  Reaching a deserted part of the stage, the figure stopped, and the Doctor had to duck behind a cluster of lamps as it looked around warily, obviously checking to see if it was being watched. Then the figure reached inside its hooded jacket, extracted a gleaming, pistol-like device and levelled it deliberately at the movie star.

  With horror, the Doctor realised that she was too far away to have any chance of stopping the figure pulling the trigger. Even as she watched, a faint, ethereal beam of energy began to emanate from the tip of the weapon, snaking its way towards the oblivious actress.

  As the Doctor looked around frantically for a solution she suddenly noticed several huge black drapes furled up in the studio ceiling. Snatching the sonic screwdriver from her pocket, she set it to maximum and aimed it at the ropes holding the drapes in place. There was a sharp ‘crack’ as the fibres parted under the onslaught of the sonic vibrations and waves of black cloth tumbled down towards the studio floor.

  The drapes hit the floor with a deafening whumph, launching clouds of dust into the air, blocking the path of the energy beam and sending the hooded figure tumbling backwards. On the other side of the drape there was pandemonium: furious voices demanding to know what was going on and the sound of stage technicians running to see what had caused the curtains to fall.

  Ignoring the chaos she had caused, the Doctor marched towards the small, hooded figure, looming over it.

  ‘Whatever you’re planning, it stops now.’

  Startled, the figure swung towards her, and as it did so the ghostly, pale beam of energy from the muzzle of the weapon washed over her, making her stagger.

  ‘Doctor?’ Yaz and Ryan came running over, alerted by the commotion. ‘Are you OK?’

  The figure gave a cry of alarm, stuffed the weapon back into its jacket and scrambled to its feet to flee but, despite her swimming head, the Doctor was determined to get some answers.

  ‘Oh no you don’t.’

  She lunged forward, catching hold of the figure by its hood. With a hiss of displeasure, it started to struggle, strong despite its small size.

  ‘Ryan, give me a hand here!’ yelled the Doctor, aware that they needed to get her prisoner out of the studio. ‘Yaz, open that fire door.’

  With Yaz and Ryan’s help, the Doctor managed to bundle the figure out of the door and they emerged into a wide, deserted alleyway behind the stage.

  Reaching into the figure’s jacket, the Doctor grabbed hold of the gun that it had been using. ‘You won’t be needing this any more.’

  The figure reached desperately for the weapon. ‘Please, I need that.’ The voice was thin, high-pitched and sounded desperately unhappy.

  ‘Yeah, right.’ Ryan pushed it back roughly. ‘Well, tough. You can’t be going around shooting movie stars.’

  ‘That’s odd …’ The Doctor was examining the weapon curiously.

  ‘What is it?’ asked Yaz.

  The Doctor pulled her sonic screwdriver from her pocket, scanned the weapon and looked at the readout in surprise. ‘It’s not a gun. It’s a neurological scanner.’ She looked down at the figure curiously. ‘What are you scanning Audrey Hepburn with a neurological scanner for?’

  Before the figure could answer, the door to the studio crashed open and an annoyed-looking Graham emerged. ‘I might have known it was you lot making all that racket. Can’t we go anywhere without it turning into a palaver …?’ He looked down at the hooded figure. ‘Who’s this, then?’

  The figure pulled back its hood to reveal a smooth, rodent-like face, large purple eyes blinking in the bright Californian sunlight.

  ‘An alien?’ Graham’s eyes widened in surprise. ‘What’s an alien doing here?’

  ‘My name is PhiLit,’ said the creature in its high-pitched voice. ‘I’m a KaaDok. I teleported down to Earth a few hours ago from a ship that is parked in orbit.’

  ‘Of course …’ The Doctor rolled her eyes. ‘I knew that silver egg in the prop store looked familiar. It’s a teleport pod!’

  PhiLit nodded.

  ‘OK, that explains the “who” and the “how”,’ said Yaz. ‘What about the “why”?’

  ‘I think we’d all like to know that …’ The Doctor squatted down in front of the creature. ‘Care to give us an explanation?’

  The creature gave a deep sigh. ‘It’s really not as sinister as you think. The KaaDok are huge fans of the television and film output of this planet.’

  ‘You’re kidding me?’ snorted Ryan. ‘You’re saying you’ve got Sky or Netflix or something? You’re sitting up in your spaceship watching box sets of Game of Thrones …?’

  ‘No, no, no.’ The Doctor shook her head. ‘Every transmission, every television show, every radio broadcast, it just beams out into space, year after year, an endless stream of data from the planet Earth, a living history. The KaaDok must be intercepting those signals.’

  PhiLit nodded. ‘We had nothing like it on our world. Once we discovered the transmissions, we began to intercept more and more of them. We became fascinated by the images from this planet. Now we are your number one fans.’

  ‘I know what you mean.’ The Doctor leaned forward conspiratorially, ‘I’m not actually from this planet, but I’m a pretty big fan myself.’

  ‘OK. So you’re a big fan of our TV and films,’ said Ryan, suspiciously. ‘Still doesn’t explain that, does it?’ He pointed at the neurological scanner in the Doctor’s hand.

  ‘No …’ The Doctor had to agree. ‘It’s not exactly the same as asking for an autograph, is it?’

  ‘The scanners allow us to collect copies of brainwave patterns.’

  ‘Us?’ queried Yaz. ‘There are more of you?’

  ‘Oh yes.’ The KaaDok nodded cheerfully. ‘There are dozens of us, travelling all through the history of this planet collecting brainwave patterns from hundreds of celebrities.’

  ‘But what for?’ asked Graham impatiently.

  ‘For the wax-bots’ said PhiLit as if that explained everything. ‘For the museum. Miss Hepburn is going to be a very popular addition to the Twentieth Century gallery.’

  ‘Oh, that’s brilliant!’ The Doctor clambered back to her feet and turned to her friends with a huge grin on her face. ‘I’ve heard of the KaaDok. They’ve created a Madame Tussauds in space, populated with android replicas of Earth celebrities.’

  ‘Populated?’ said Ryan. ‘You mean these things move around?’

  ‘Yes. The KaaDok come down here, collect brainwave patterns, then upload them into the androids to create perfect walking, talking wax replicas.’ She sighed. ‘I’d always hoped that someone would make a waxwork of me one day.’ A puzzled look crossed the Doctor’s face. ‘But wait, hang on a minute. This is a pretty small-scale device to perform a brainwave scan, particularly if you’re collecting more than one pattern. I appreciate you’re downsizing to avoid any lasting discomfort to those you’re scanning, but surely the data will start to deteriorate pretty quickly.’

  PhiLit nodded. ‘The transfer to the wax-bot’s neural mesh has to be done within minutes for it to be successful.’

  Yaz frowned. ‘But surely that means that you’d have to have the wax replica nearby …’

  ‘Oh yes,’ said PhiLit. ‘The replica of Miss Hepburn is on board my transport pod. Would you like to see?’

  Before the Doctor could reply, the door to the studio crashed open again, and a furious voice rang out.

  ‘Are you the ones who just ruined the last take? George and I have been rehearsing that scene for hours and that was the best that it had been.’

  The Doctor and her friends turned slowly to find Audrey Hepburn glaring at them.

  ‘Oh, blimey,’ said Graham, trying to obscure her view of PhiLit.

  ‘Well?’ The actress strode towards them, her elfin features creased with anger. ‘What have you got to say for yourselves?’

  Graham suddenly realised how Henry Higgins must have felt like when confronted by an angry Eliza Doolittle. He did the only thing he could think of.

  ‘Here …’ He pulled the sunglasses from his pocket. ‘We just wanted to return these …’

  The Doctor hurried forward to try to explain. ‘I’m very, very sorry about that. Needed to create a diversion, didn’t really have much time to think …’

  Audrey ignored her, staring at the sunglasses in Graham’s hand. ‘Those are the glasses that were stolen from me!’

  ‘Stolen?’ Graham looked crestfallen.

  ‘Oh!’ The Doctor shook her head. ‘No no no … Borrowed, perhaps …’

  ‘You stole Audrey Hepburn’s sunglasses?’ Graham gave a sigh of despair. ‘Only you, Doc …’

  Sheepishly, the Doctor turned back to her friends. ‘I was in my last body at the time. In the Belgian Congo. I’d been tracking a Barroxian surveillance probe that had crashed in the forest near where they were filming. I needed a UV shield to inspect the malfunctioning photon drive, but had left my sonic sunglasses in the TARDIS, and her sunglasses were just lying there …’

  Audrey was staring at the Doctor curiously. ‘It was the night we saw that meteor. There was a tall, grey-haired man who suddenly appeared out of nowhere and—’

  She broke off as she suddenly caught a glimpse of the diminutive KaaDok peering up at her from behind Graham’s legs.

  ‘Oh my …’

  The Doctor sighed. ‘Miss Hepburn – Aud – I think we owe you an explanation …’

  A short while later, the Doctor, her friends and Miss Hepburn were standing in front of PhiLit’s teleport pod: the squat, silver egg, squatting on four stumpy legs, that was standing in the corner of the prop store where the Doctor had landed the TARDIS.

  ‘Concealing our transport is always a matter of some concern,’ explained the KaaDok. ‘Fortunately, film and television studios have many places such as this that are ideal for our purposes.’

  ‘Yes …’ said the Doctor, glancing over at the battered blue shell of her own transport. ‘Lucky that …’

  Audrey was staring at the pod with disdain. ‘I don’t understand. Surely this is just a prop from that science fiction film that they’re filming on the back lot.’ A thought suddenly struck her and she glanced down at the KaaDok. ‘Yes, of course. You’re extras from the film. This is just some practical joke. Blake isn’t going to be pleased when he finds out, you know …’

  ‘It’s a little bit more complicated than that,’ explained the Doctor. ‘PhiLit …’

  PhiLit pushed back the sleeve of his jacket, revealing a complex wrist-device. He pressed a sequence of buttons and there was a sharp crackle as a gleaming, silver teleport pod split open and light flooded out into the prop store.

  The Doctor peered into the interior of the pod. A compact control console stood in the centre of the tiny craft and the curved walls were lined with alcoves just big enough to hold a person. One of those alcoves was occupied.

  Audrey had spotted the figure too and her eyes opened wide with astonishment. ‘I don’t believe it …’

  PhiLit reached out for the neurological scanner in the Doctor’s hand. ‘May I?’

  The Doctor handed over the device, watching as PhiLit made a number of delicate adjustments before activating it. The same pale, ghostly light that the Doctor had seen in the studio enveloped the motionless figure in the alcove, and moments later it stepped out of the pod.

  Audrey stared in astonishment at her double. The resemblance was quite uncanny. The KaaDok had done an extraordinary job. The features were identical, the build exact … Even the stitching on the costume appeared to have been copied.

  ‘Why isn’t it talking?’ asked Ryan.

  ‘The neural net will take a little time to get to full autonomic function,’ explained PhiLit.

  ‘Well, the other one isn’t talking much either,’ pointed out Graham, ‘and I don’t think that’s got anything to do with neural nets.’

  The Doctor glanced at Audrey, who was obviously struggling to come to terms with what she was seeing. ‘Are you OK?’

  The simple question pulled the actress from her from her daze. ‘What? Yes. This is all a little … unexpected, that’s all.’ She looked at the Doctor curiously. ‘Extraordinary things seem to happen when you are around, Doctor.’

  The Doctor shrugged. ‘Occupational hazard, I’m afraid.’

  ‘Well, you still owe me an explanation as to what all this –’ she gestured to the wax-bot and the waiting PhiLit – ‘is all about.’

  ‘The truth?’ With a deep breath, the Doctor explained about the KaaDok’s peculiar obsession with Earth entertainment, and their mission to collect brain patterns for the exhibits in their wax museums.

  ‘So the work that we do, the films we make, the television shows, are being watched all through the galaxy?’

  ‘Yes.’ The Doctor nodded. ‘Your work reaches billions of people, of all races.’

  ‘Bet you wish your agent got the repeat fees for all that, eh?’ said Graham cheekily.

  Ignoring him, Audrey ran her hands over the metallic silver skin of the teleport pod. ‘And these aliens – these KaaDok – they travel through space in craft like this?’

  ‘Well, no. This is just a short-range transport pod.’

  ‘Our mother ship is in orbit,’ explained PhiLit. ‘From there, the Supervisor can beam us down to locations all over the world.’

  ‘Can we see it?’ Audrey turned back towards the Doctor, her eyes shining with excitement.

  ‘What?’ The Doctor was taken aback. ‘You want to go up and see the mothership?’

  ‘Yes.’ Audrey nodded. ‘Ever since that night in the jungle, I’ve dreamed about the worlds beyond the stars. I want to see these wonders for myself.’

  The Doctor grinned. ‘Aud, you are brilliant!’

  ‘Hey, now hang on a minute, Doc.’ Graham sounded concerned. ‘You can’t just go whizzing off into space with Audrey Hepburn!’

  ‘Why not?’ said the Doctor and Audrey simultaneously.

  ‘Because she’s meant to be making Breakfast at Tiffany’s!’ spluttered Graham. ‘It’s Elvis all over again. What about … causality? What about not altering established history? If anything happened whilst you were up there …’