I put it aside for now. There was a leaking faucet to fix first.

  12

  Stella

  Gathered around the dining room table, the boys and Jasper dug into the pot roast, creamy carrots, and flavorful potatoes. I'd invited Jasper to sit in what had not so long ago been Rex's seat. It was strange to see another man where my husband had spent so many evenings devouring my cooking without a word of thanks.

  "This is delicious," Jasper said. "Are the herbs fresh?"

  "Yes, they're from Caspian's herb garden," I said. "We're pleased with how well they're doing."

  "Nothing can beat fresh, can it?" Jasper asked before swallowing another bite of the roast.

  Caspian grinned. He'd lost both front teeth of late and his adult replacements had not yet arrived. "Mama and me planted them ourselves."

  "The fresh thyme and rosemary really make the dish,” Jasper said.

  “I’m surprised you can tell they were fresh,” I said.

  “I have a very discerning tongue.” Jasper smiled and picked up his glass of red wine I’d poured for us from the box I kept under the sink.

  Discerning tongue.

  Why had those words just sent a shiver down my spine?

  To distract myself, I glanced out the window. Snow fell as thick as feathers released from a burst pillow. If it continued like this, Jasper would be stuck here. In the morning, the plows would come through and clean the main road. However, tonight, in the dark, the visibility would be almost nil.

  "You'll have to stay over if it keeps up," I said, as if we'd been talking about the weather.

  Jasper's brow furrowed for a moment. "I remember a storm like this last January. It was a chore to clear my driveway."

  "We have a tractor," Atticus said. "With a scooper."

  “None of us ever get to skip school," Caspian said mournfully.

  "You'd miss a lot of school if you stayed home every time it snowed," I said.

  “Wouldn’t that be awesome?” Caspian asked. “We could make cookies all day.”

  The boys launched into more questions for Jasper. He was a good sport, answering anything they wanted to know.

  “Do you have brothers?” Rafferty asked.

  “No. I’m an only child. Not like you guys. You're lucky," Jasper said.

  “What’s your favorite part about Thanksgiving dinner?” Caspian asked.

  “Stuffing,” Jasper said. “Preferably made from corn bread. And gravy. I love gravy.”

  “Gravy’s good,” Caspian said. “Especially Mama’s.”

  “Where’s your wife?” Rafferty asked.

  “I don’t have one.”

  “How come?” Atticus asked.

  “I never met the right woman. Not yet anyway.” Jasper glanced down the table at me, a sheepish smile on his face.

  My stomach plummeted. Was he insinuating interest in me?

  Why else would he be over here fixing leaks and putting in light bulbs?

  Could I let myself trust again? Fall in love?

  The conversation veered to Jasper's remodeling stories. "One time, I fell through the second-story floor right into the living room below. Got my leg trapped under some wood and had to wait for my buddy to come rescue me. He'd gone out to get us some tacos for lunch."

  “What kind of tacos?” Caspian asked.

  “Pork,” Jasper said. “From this dive around the corner. Really tasty.”

  "Was anything broken?" I asked, cringing. The idea of being trapped made my skin crawl.

  "Nah, my head's too thick for that." Jasper thumped the side of his head with a clenched fist.

  The boys giggled.

  "Then there was another time I tore down a wall and you won't believe what I found in there." Jasper looked around the table, clearly inviting guesses.

  "Treasure?" Rafferty asked.

  "A dead body?" Atticus suggested.

  "A smelly dead rat?” Soren asked. "We had one of those."

  We had indeed. What a smell, too. For weeks we had to wait it out until the animal fully decayed. Rex had wanted to tear open the wall but I knew if he did that, we'd never get it repaired again. Until I did it myself, of course. Thad had still been in diapers and crawling everywhere. I could barely keep up with that kid. Of all the boys, he'd been the most physically active. If I weren't careful, he'd climb up a kitchen cabinet and start opening drawers with dangerous appliances.

  "Any other guesses?" Jasper asked. "Should I give you a hint?"

  Choruses of yeses rose from around the table.

  "The inhabitants of said wall were furry. And cute." Jasper raised one eyebrow. “What could that be?”

  "Puppies?" Caspian asked.

  "Close. A mama and her five kittens," Jasper said. "Kind of like you guys."

  "These boys are more like puppies," I said, chuckling.

  “I was thinking the same thing earlier.” Jasper and I locked eyes for a brief moment. Another plunge of the stomach, followed this time by butterflies.

  "What did you do with them?" Atticus asked, as if I were being interrogated for a crime.

  "The mama cat didn't have any tags or anything to identify her, so I took them to a shelter. Once they were old enough, they were given away to families who could provide them a good home."

  "What about the mama kitty?" Soren asked. "Did they kill her?"

  Jasper blanched, looking slightly shocked. "No, no. A shelter wouldn’t kill her. They do whatever they can to find cats a good home. In this case, Penny came home with me. Eventually. At first she and the babies were very sick. They had to feed them all with one of those eyedropper things.” He tapped his thumb and index together to mime using a tube.

  "Did they all live?” Caspian asked, tears springing to his eyes.

  “Yes, they did,” Jasper said. "In fact, I'm in touch with all of the families, and the kittens are living very spoiled lives. Two families took pairs—they like to be with their brother or sister."

  "What about the other one?" Atticus asked. "The one who was adopted without his brothers?"

  "He's doing well,” Jasper said. "An older grandmother type took him. He’s the most pampered of all."

  Atticus sighed, clearly relieved. "That's good."

  After dinner, I stood at the kitchen window. Jasper would have to stay until morning. It would be impossible to see two feet in front of the truck in this weather.

  I placed Jasper’s pie in the oven to warm while I filled the sink with soapy water. The boys and Jasper cleared the table. Even Thad helped by bringing in the used napkins.

  “The ice cream’s perfect,” Jasper said, pulling the blade from the container. Thad clambered up the step stool to get a better look, eyes wide.

  “Atticus, get Soren and Thad ready for bed,” I said. “They’ve already had their baths. The rest of you, get showered. Anyone who has their jammies on gets pie and ice cream.”

  The boys filed out, Thad hanging on to Atticus’s hand.

  Jasper folded his arms over his chest and leaned against the cabinet. “You’re an amazing mother.”

  “Thanks. They’re good boys.”

  “They’re obedient and so curious. You’ve done well.”

  “They have their moments,” I said, pleased he’d noticed how well-behaved they were. I’d done a lot of things wrong, but at least I had my boys to prove I wasn’t a complete failure.

  Jasper nudged me aside. “Let me in there. The cook shouldn’t have to wash the dishes too.”

  “Fine, if you insist.” I couldn't help but be charmed by Jasper Moon. How was this man single? What would my life have been like had I married a man like this one instead of a man like Rex?

  Why did he have to be so good-looking? And handy? He’d fixed two things for me already and he’d only been here a few hours. The boys were clearly crazy about him. But with all these kids in tow, would he even look my way?

  “You went dark,” Jasper said. “What’s up?”

  I turned to look at him. “I was thinking about my divorce. Wondering what Rex has up his sleeve. He’ll want this place to sell if he can get his hands on it.”

  “I know an attorney,” Jasper said. “My best friend back in California. He can help.”

  “I don’t have money to pay.”

  “He’s a softy. Once he hears your story, he’ll want to help.”

  “That would be nice. Thank you.” My gaze traveled the length of his tall, muscular physique. He had his sweater sleeves rolled up, showing off his ropy forearms. Suds from the dishwater had caught in the hairs near his wrist. “You’re going to have to stay the night.”

  Jasper reached into the sink to pull up the stopper. The water made a whistling noise as it started to drain. He then knelt to open the cupboard under the sink and poked his head in, presumably to see if he’d fixed the leak.

  He pulled his head back out from under the sink, reminding me a little of a tortoise. “You think?”

  I gestured lamely toward the window. “I can’t have you driving home in this.”

  “And me without my toothbrush,” he said, smiling.

  “I’ve got an extra one around somewhere.”

  “Great. Should we have pie now?”

  “Will it be weird for you?” I asked.

  “I’d have thought yes, but after being here tonight, I’d have to say an emphatic no.” He drew closer.

  After the boys went to bed, full of dinner, the two of us settled in the living room. Thad, Soren, and Rafferty had all asked if Jasper could tuck them in. Frankly, that flabbergasted me. Their dad had never tucked them in. Where did they even get the idea?

  A movie had arrived in the mail that day from Netflix. I offered to put it on but expected him to balk when he saw it was a rom-com starring Julia Roberts and Hugh Grant.

  "I've been wanting to see this one," he said.

  "For real?"

  "My mom and I have watched every romantic movie ever made," he said. “I am the result of growing up as an only child of a single mom."

  I made us each a cup of herbal tea and settled on the couch to watch. He put several more logs on the fire and then sat in one of the easy chairs. My living room was nothing special, but it was cozy, especially on a snowy night like this one.

  We watched, laughing at parts and crying at the end when she makes her grand gesture. By the time it was over, the hour was after ten. We agreed to get to bed.

  "I'll show you up to the guest room," I said.

  "I wanted to ask you something first. It's about your place here. Atticus told me his idea about how to keep the ranch." He launched into Atticus's plan.

  “Yes, he told me that idea as well,” I said.

  “But you have a loan that hasn’t been paid."

  "My father would turn over in his grave. Except he was cremated."

  "Is it something you'd consider?" He leaned back in his chair, crossing a leg over one knee.

  "I might. I mean, if I could even get a loan. And then there's all this unresolved stuff with Rex. Who knows what he’s going to do. I’m afraid he’s going to ask for half of this ranch, which means I’d have to sell.”

  “We’ll get my buddy on this,” Jasper said. “Try not to worry. Also, my bank might be able to help with financing. I can get creative—maybe wrap the mortgage into a new loan. There are a lot of options. I’d have to look at the numbers, obviously.”

  “You really think your bank would approve a loan? For me and the crazy idea of an eleven-year-old?”

  “A forty-year-old trapped in an eleven-year-old body,” Jasper said. “Anyway, I happen to think it's a stupendous idea, and I happen to know the bank manager here in town. In fact, he may have a crush on one Stella McKinnon.”

  I went hot. Burning hot. Crush. He had a crush on me? I chose to ignore that comment. For now. “Don’t you have superiors who would have to approve?”

  “I do, yes. However, I’ve built trust over the years. If I recommended something, they’d agree to it. Mostly likely anyway." He scratched under his chin. "You could offer an old-fashioned Christmas experience around this time of year. Get a sled to take people out for excursions. Do you have a sledding hill for kids?"

  "Yeah, sure,” I said. “But I don't want people in my house. This is my home, not a hotel."

  "Completely valid. However, little cabins could be a great option. We could build them for pretty cheap."

  "We?" I asked.

  "I mean, you. Although I could help if you wanted. At least find you a decent contractor and keep on them to make sure they delivered what they said they would."

  "I'll sleep on it," I said. “I’m not sure I’m capable of making any decisions right now.” What was I saying? I had no time to waste or I’d lose my family home. “I take that back. I have to get my act together.”

  “I could help you write up a business plan. Also, I have some cash. I’ve been looking for a good investment. This might be it.”

  I was speechless. Was this man for real? “Um, okay.”

  Jasper stood, yawning. "Now, show me that guest room. I'm beat. Your boys have a lot of energy."

  "Is that why I'm so old and tired?"

  "You're not old," he said. “But you’ve earned the right to be tired.”

  Before we headed up the stairs, I reached out to touch his wrist briefly. “Thanks for everything tonight. It was nice to have company, and thank you for fixing my leaky pipe and replacing the bulb.”

  “Anytime.” He smiled at me in the dim light. It was everything I could do to keep from throwing myself into his arms. Thankfully, I restrained myself.

  A banging startled me awake. Foggy and disoriented, I looked over at the clock. Three a.m.

  Had I really heard it or had I been dreaming? My heart thudded as I waited in the dark. Then it came again. A definite pounding on my front door.

  I reached for my bathrobe and stumbled over to the door. When I reached the hallway, Jasper was already standing there. I flipped the hallway light on.

  “Who could be here at this hour?” I whispered, not wanting to wake the boys.

  “Someone stuck in the snow?”

  “Right. Could be.” Still, I didn’t want to go to the door for fear it was someone trying to get in and hurt us.

  “I’ll go first. Stay behind me.” Jasper patted my shoulder. “It’ll be all right.”

  We hustled down the stairs. Another knock startled me. “I’m getting the poker.” I ran into the living room and grabbed the fire poker and rejoined him in the foyer.

  I snapped on the porch light and peeked out through the small window on the side of the door. It was Rex. Lying in a pool of blood.

  “Oh God,” I gasped, then screamed, then yanked open the door.

  He wore no jacket, only a thin sweatshirt.

  I dropped to my knees. It was a gunshot wound to his chest. I’d seen enough growing up on a ranch to recognize. Instinctively, I pressed into the wound, hoping to curb bleeding. Rex stirred and moaned. “Call 911,” I screamed to Jasper.

  “Rex, look at me. Wake up.”

  Rex’s eyes opened slowly. “Stella,” he said, barely audible. “The porch light was on. I could see it and I made my way here. It took so long.”

  “Hang in there,” I whispered. “You’re going to be fine.”

  “I did so much to hurt you. None of it deserved.” He spoke as if it were hard to breathe, gasping for air. I strained to hear him, willing him to keep talking. “I’m so cold.”

  His pants were covered in snow. He’d trekked through all this with no jacket? Where had he come from? Why had he been out in this storm? “What happened to you?”

  Rex opened his mouth to speak, but no words came. Blood appeared at the corners of his mouth. Oh my God. Please, God. Help him.

  From behind me, Jasper talked to dispatch. “I’m at the house of a friend and her estranged husband just showed up at the doorway. He’s been shot in the chest. It looks bad.”

  “Jennie,” Rex managed to say.

  “What about her?” I asked.

  “She hated you, and you could never see it.”

  “What are you talking about? She’s my best friend.”

  “I picked wrong.” His words came slow and labored. Blood covered his mouth. “And now I have to pay the piper.” His eyes dulled and little by little, he slipped away from me until he was no more. Gone from this world.

  I continued to press into his wound, unable to let go of hope. But he was so still. Nothing but an empty vessel now. The boy who had captured my heart all those years ago had been gone long before now, replaced by a man who hurt me over and over. Still, this was different. All parts of him, good and bad and in between, were no longer. His body was already starting to stiffen.

  His last act had been to bang on my front door, collapsing soon thereafter. Why? What did he mean about Jennie hating me?

  “He’s gone,” I whispered. “Dead.”

  Jasper fell to his knees beside me but remained on the phone. “He’s passed away,” Jasper said into the phone. “Yes, right. Okay. I’ll wait to hear.”

  Jasper set aside the phone and gently removed my hands from Rex’s chest. “They’re sending an ambulance, but the roads aren’t cleared yet. We have to wait.”

  “The police. We need the police.” I started shaking. My skin felt clammy and sticky. I looked down at my lap, realizing they were covered in blood. Rex’s blood. “Someone shot him.”

  “She understood and is sending the police too,” Jasper said. “As soon as they can.”

  “But they have to hurry. Will they hurry?” I knew I was speaking nonsense, but I couldn’t find the right words.

  “Yes, they’re hurrying. They’ll be here soon. Will you come inside with me to wait?” Jasper asked. “It’s too cold for you to be out here.”

  “What time is it?”

  “Just after three,” Jasper said.

  The snow had ceased falling, but probably four feet covered the ground. Usually the snowplow wouldn’t start up until dawn. An ambulance or the police would not get here before the boys woke. We had to hide the body from the kids.