“But today, I’m seeing them too,” I said. Slipping my award under my arm, I unbuttoned the cuffs at my sleeves, and then rolled them. This was me leaving business here with him. I was home now and was going to be comfortable. I put a hand on his shoulder with a smile. “Now, you can follow us, and hell, even stay with us if you want. My Gram’s got plenty of room and I’m sure she wouldn’t mind. She’s just welcoming like that. There’ll also be plenty of food too if you’re hungry. Plenty of pie.”

  I wasn’t budging on this, and I think, at this point, he knew that. He ran a hand down his face, and then stood before me, not breaking eye contact. If I didn’t know any better, I’d say this was a standoff, but I knew that wasn’t true. This man worked for me. I squeezed his arm, emphasizing that. “So will you be staying with us, Rich? Last call.”

  I knew good and well he wouldn’t, and maybe that’s the only reason I offered. I honestly, didn’t want him anywhere near my family. I just didn’t.

  “That’s some piece of hardware,” my brother said, glancing to the award sitting in my lap and then back to the road. We’d been driving for a little while now.

  My lips righted into a smile. “Yeah.” Thinking about something, I pulled out my phone, taking a picture of it, and I got Brody’s attention as I did.

  “What’re you doing?”

  Drafting a text, I hit send, showing it to someone else who wasn’t here today. She could have been, but I didn’t want her to make the journey if she’d be tied up. She explained she was busy with the wedding, so of course I let her off the hook. I looked at Brody. “Just showing, Roxie.”

  He nodded at that, going back to navigating the road, and I turned my head on seat, watching the passing hills of El Paso as we traveled out of the heart and to my Gram’s property. Being here felt crazy surreal. It was almost as if I was a different person the last time I saw this land and watched this sky. Now, the clouds above were drifting into an orange glow, the sun starting to set.

  My phone buzzed, and I brought it up.

  “Nice,” Roxie texted with a smilie face.

  So few words from her these days and I felt like a crazy guy the way I continued to check up on her every chance I got. I couldn’t help it. Roxie had never been chatty in texts, but she did engage them. Lately, that had been me. Lately all communication had been me and I didn’t miss that.

  She’d tell me if something was wrong right? We didn’t keep things from each other.

  I threw my head back, closing my eyes, but a laugh made me turn my head. Brody.

  “Tired?” he asked, a small smile on his lips.

  Tired. Stressed.

  Missing my girl.

  My brother had no desire to go deep into my psyche though. No, doubt about that. Simply telling him yes, I closed my eyes and went into my thoughts as I drifted off into them. My thoughts lingered of Roxie and all the time we’d been apart lately. My thoughts lingered on our conversations and their lack of depth, the one just yesterday still solid in my mind.

  “Hey, babe,” she said, her voice through the phone. The tone always resonated so warmly in my ear, made me automatically smile.

  And I did, leaning back into my chair and undoing my tie in my hotel room. The day had been long. Always so long. But what she was about to say made it even longer.

  “I’m actually about to turn in,” she said.

  She barely had given me a chance to tell her I loved her before she left me with an empty silence on my end, our calls usually pretty short now a days. That’s another reason why I believed some kind of break should be sooner rather than later. Roxie and I always talked to each other, but these days we seemed disconnected and on different wavelengths.

  I could only blame that on me, my job.

  Some commotion outside brought me out of my head and back into the world. I expected to see my Gram’s ranch home, the wide abyss of land surrounding it, and though I did see that. What I didn’t expect to see?

  The paparazzi.

  Clustered outside the wooden gate of my Gram’s home, Brody’s truck crunching on the gravel got their attention. They whipped around, flashing streams of light from their cameras, and I lifted a hand, covering my face while the truck moved through the gate’s entry.

  “They’ve been here since yesterday,” Brody said, firm line on his lips. “Must have known you’d be coming around here eventually.”

  Must have. The guilt pitted my stomach that Gram had to deal with that shit, but then Brody said.

  “Auntie sprayed them with the hose yesterday.”

  My headshot around, my jaw dropped. “No, she didn’t.” I mean, my Aunt Robin was surely capable, but that seemed like a new kind of crazy even for her.

  Brody simply nodded, and I guess I was proven wrong. He revved up the engine of his four by four, leaving dust behind him from the gravel road and I nearly hacked a lung in laughter, watching the paps cough into their hands as we sped away from them up the drive. My fuckin’ family, dude, and I loved every one of them.

  “Look what the cat dragged in!” Brody shouted over his shoulder moments later, pocketing his keys as we walked into my Gram’s place. Again, it was surreal being here. With the polished wooden panels and the warm smell of Texas BBQ livin’ in the house, I knew nothing changed.

  A flourish of blonde hair flew into the room, carried by tiny legs and Brody bent, mock growling. The little girl screamed and he picked her up, laughing with her as she giggled. It took me a moment to recognize her. My niece Sarah, my brother Hayden’s kid, was barely walking last time I saw her. Now, she was running.

  “Say, hi, to your Uncle Griff, Sarah. You rude little thing,” he told her.

  Laughing, I gave her a hug when she reached out for me. I couldn’t believe the change in her. What a few months really could do. She slid over to me and I held her, but then I was ambushed. Sarah must have just been the fastest.

  Her mom Karen came out, barefoot and pregnant. Gram told me she was expecting.

  “Griffin,” she greeted, hugging me too. I had her child so she took her when she pulled away. “You’re all over the TV. It’s so exciting.”

  Hayden came out of nowhere, and suddenly I found myself in another headlock. He’d apparently been growing out his hair too. A sweep of blond covered both his face and mine when he held me down.

  “Hay, you and Brody got a quota to meet today or something?” I asked him, referring to the headlock. But I couldn’t help laughing and barely struggled under his arm. Our sizes were starting to match now that I did my job full time and I knew I could probably get away from him if I wanted. I just chose not to.

  “Making up for lost time,” he simply said, righting with me under his arm. He looked as if he’d rag me further, but another one of my family members got a hold of me.

  Aunt Robin pulled me into an embrace, screaming and carry on more than anyone. But I knew that was probably because she was the loudest. I laughed, hugging her back.

  “Now, them jackasses out there didn’t give you a hard time, did they?” she asked, pointing an aggressive finger toward the door. I assumed she meant the paparazzi. “I noticed they gathered again. I’m about to head out there right now. I just wanted to see you.”

  Smiling, I told her they didn’t bother me. I was afraid of what she’d do to them if I said anything but.

  She patted my face and I noticed the broom in her hand. I wondered what she was about to do with it, but then she said she’d be right back. And I watched, jaw slacked, as she sauntered from the group. She left from the room, the screen door squeaking shut behind her as she went down the front porch to who I assumed were the paparazzi. I had to say when it came to Aunt Robin though? I wasn’t surprised.

  “Griffin?”

  I knew her voice anywhere. I heard it daily as I called her daily. But hearing it wasn’t the same though.

  It wasn’t the same as being home.

  My gram stood in front of me, wiping her hands off on the apron tied around her waist. Hard at work in her kitchen, I could imagine.

  The group made room and I went to her, bending to her height and squeezing her tiny frame tight. But not too tight, though. She was fragile.

  “We missed you, boy,” she said, pushing a hand through my hair.

  And I think that’s when it really set in. I was home.

  Everyone seemed to have settled down by the time Gram laid everything out for dinner, my aunt and sister-in-law helping her. The only folks missing were my youngest brother Colt as he wouldn’t be driving in from college until tomorrow for the fitting, and of course my pop.

  “Carter’s got him working long hours,” Brody later told me on my Gram’s couch, the dinner dishes long been washed and the TV in front of us all allowing us to let the food settle. “Gram’s been really getting on him about it. His health and stuff. Apparently, after his last couple doctor’s visits he came back with high blood pressure. Overworking himself.”

  I had to shake my head at the statement, pulling back my beer and taking a draw off it. My pop worked hard. Always had, but he needed to take care of himself. He’d never quit working though. He didn’t have to now. None of my family did now that I had a means to help them out, but that just wasn’t the type of folks we were.

  I just love if he could get out of that place somehow though. It was steady work and I knew Pop enjoyed it, but Carter worked him to the bone, him and my brothers. Hell, I would be too if I went that route.

  Though disappointed I couldn’t see my old man tonight, I didn’t worry too much about it. I expected to see him tomorrow at the fitting and looked forward to it. Really, my entire time here. I needed a break from my current reality, and being home? That would definitely get me out of my head for a while.

  The night winding down, I quickly went into that. Brody, Hayden and his small family, had headed back to their homes for the night, but for Gram and me, our night was just starting. She took me around her land, just me and her while the sun basked a glow over her property. The sounds of evening quickly engulfed the place and we walked into it well past dark, just chillin’ and not letting the world get to us.

  We sat on her back porch after we were done, creaking in matching rocking chairs. At some point, the paps had left from the front, making it quiet around the whole house.

  “You’re happy,” she told me, smiling. “But you’re tired.”

  Nothing got past her. Nothing at all. I nodded. “I love it definitely. But it’s got its not so good parts too.”

  “And Roxie? How’s she doing? I feel like I haven’t talked to her lately.”

  In a way, I felt we shared that similarity. Because even though I talked to Roxie pretty much every day, I did feel like we hadn’t actually spoken in a long time. She didn’t act like she minded with her few words.

  But maybe I was starting to.

  Gram looked over her shoulder in that second, not really staring at anything in particular as we were on the porch and a smile suddenly touched her lips. Like the expression was more toward herself. Reaching over, she squeezed my hand.

  “You’ll have to tell me another time,” she said, pushing herself up from her chair. When she did, her dress swayed and the length covered her brown boots. “Old woman has to get some rest. Don’t stay up too late.”

  I lent a cheek out to her when she came to kiss it, holding her by the shoulder in a hug. She left me to her land, my thoughts, and I couldn’t help wishing Roxie had been able to come, or I guess more so that I could have convinced her to come. I needed her with me. I wanted her here with me. She’d found something in Miami though, had a life, her friends and everything, and I couldn’t bring myself to take that away from her just to be with me.

  That didn’t mean I couldn’t go to her.

  Picking up my phone, I texted someone, feeling this was long overdue.

  “Don’t book me for anything in the next week,” I told Mickey. “I need some time off. Sorry.”

  I think I realized something today. I did have power. I did have pull when it came to my life and I could use it if I felt I needed to. After all, I had told Rich no and he didn’t fight me once I stood my ground. I shouldn’t feel guilty for wanting time off. I needed some time. For me, for Roxie, and if that meant canceling a few promo opportunities so be it. His returned text told me just how much pull I did have.

  “Whatever you need,” he said. “I’ll have Rich clear your schedule.”

  I smiled, surprised at the feeling of relief I felt at the approval. I shouldn’t have doubted his support with me on this. He’d always stood by me. But still, I had for some reason. Perhaps, that was because he’d urged me to continue working. He seemed to be onboard now though.

  On a roll, I decided to nudge him a bit about Roxie’s gift. The house I was building for her, our home. He told me he’d text me pictures tomorrow and I was pretty damn excited to see them. Reveling in my thoughts of how the project was going, a gentle throat clearing caught me off guard, gaining my attention.

  A big body stood in the shadows of my Gram’s porch, and making it out, the man there made me sit at attention if only to present myself just a little bit better in his presence.

  “Pop?” I said, surprised to see him. Everyone told me he’d worked today, so he couldn’t make it over.

  “Hey,” he mumbled with a sniff, just his way. He came into the dim light of my Gram’s burning citronella candle. She lit one on the table between our rockers when we stat.

  I thought to give Pop my chair as this one creaked a little less, but he raised his hand when I gripped the armrests to stand.

  Taking a seat with a huff, the blue flaps of his work shirt flailed a bit at the three open buttons. He only did that after a concluded shift. That and his Carter’s Construction ball cap on his head, reminded me again why I had yet to see him.

  I pressed my hands down pleated pants, so different from my working father. “You had to work today?” I knew of course, but wanted to make conversation.

  I was granted with an “Mmhmm,” his hand, weathered and worn, coming down his face and over his goatee.

  “Thought I’d drive down,” he said, staring out to my Gram’s land. A mare and her young foal stood out there in the wooden enclosure, the two nudging each other by the fence posts. “Come by and see ya since I missed dinner and all that.”

  But he’d see me tomorrow. At the fitting with the rest of my guys. He also lived over an hour away. By himself now as Colt was off to college and Brody was in his own apartment nearby. Saying this trip was an inconvenience for him was an understatement, but I didn’t question him. I’d never do that.

  He tapped his hands restlessly on the arms of the rocking chair he sat in. “Saw you on the uh, phone you sent me a while back. You can see videos on it and stuff.”

  I smiled, more than happy to move him on from his archaic ways. It took him forever to get used to that flip phone he’d gotten when I was in high school. So once he mastered it, he’d pretty much balked at the smart phone I shipped him.

  “Yeah?” I said, watching him.

  He nodded. “There’s this news application Brody got for me. You were on it getting your key. I watched during my break. Couldn’t miss that.”

  My lips lifted. He didn’t know how much that meant.

  “I’m real proud of you, Griff,” he said, making my heart swell with pride more. “Proud of the man you’ve become.”

  I didn’t expect this from my pop. I mean, I knew he was proud, but he never had to say it.

  I was glad he said it.

  I gave a nod, my own mumbled thanks from my lips. The words thick, I faced the land as he did, swallowing. We sat in silence for a bit and I thought about something while we did. This something also meant a lot. To me and Roxie.

  “And thanks,” I told him. “For the wedding gift? I know you haven’t finished it yet, but we really appreciate it. I can’t wait to see it. Me and Roxie. We’re both excited about it.”

  Pop really was a master at things like that. Most of my childhood toys involved his craftsmanship. Pop couldn’t always get us the newest stuff, but that didn’t matter. What he made with his hands could trump anything made in stores.

  Pop didn’t respond to me immediately. Not unusual for him as he was generally a quiet man. But something passed over his eyes as he sat there beside me. Something that made them narrow, focused in what I assumed were his thoughts.

  “Yeah, she seemed that way,” he said, another sniff coming from him. “When Brody and I were down there. That she was excited.”

  That made me happy. Not just her excitement, but that she got along with my pop and brother okay without me alongside them.

  “You been down there recently?” Pop asked, again watching the land, the mare and her baby. “To Miami? To Roxie?”

  I shook my head, sorry that wasn’t the case. “It’s been a few weeks. My schedule’s been tight. But she came to visit me not too long ago. Actually, it was the day you and Brody left. She said she just kind of stayed at the airport. She flew all the way to Georgia to see me.”

  This seemed to get this attention. His lashes flashed, his eyebrows narrowed, and he turned to me with what looked like confusion on his face under his baseball cap.

  “And you saw her?” he asked, shaking his head a little. “She came to you and you saw her?”

  Leaning forward, I put my hands together, confused myself now. “Well, yeah. Like I said, she came to see me. She missed me. I was glad she had. I missed her too. I always do when we’re apart.”

  Before I might have felt weird admitting such a vulnerable detail to my pop. We were just never touchy feely like that, but we’d had more and more conversations like this. He knew how I felt about Roxie and I had no problem sharing that with him. I was more than proud of it.

  Turning away, he sat back in his rocker. He let out a breath like he’d been holding one in and tucked his hands under his arms. Again, he sat there in silence, but something told me he had more to say. I watched him for a bit, knowing his pace. When it came to Pop, he definitely did things on his own time. Roxie was like that in her own sense. You just needed to give them that. You gave them that and they’d let you in when they were ready.