The rest of the ride to town was in awkward silence, but as soon as they got to the 4H building out on the fairgrounds, the tension in Eli’s chest eased. She shut the door to her truck and waited for Sarah to get around to the other side before she walked in.

  As soon as they were inside, it was a bustle of people and noise. They made their way to the table on the far wall where they purchased their cards. Eli got four, two for her and two for Sarah. They were stopped several times before they found a place to sit down, but Eli had planned it so they arrived just minutes before everything was supposed to start.

  There was a single microphone up front, and Judy Carsen took center stage with it. She always seemed to be in charge of events like this. Clenching her jaw, Eli set her cards out in front of her so she could see them. Judy went through the standard list of thank yous, what they were there for, and then finally the rules.

  Eli leaned over at one point and whispered into Sarah’s ear, “That woman likes to hear herself talk more than anyone else in this room does. Trust me.”

  Sarah erupted into giggles and had to work hard to contain them, her shoulders shaking. A flush reached Eli’s cheeks at the sight of the crinkles at the corner of Sarah’s eyes and her lips as she elicited a similar response in Eli herself. When Sarah turned to make a comment, they were almost mouth to mouth. Eli jerked in surprise and turned in her seat to face forward.

  Cady slipped into the seat on the opposite side of Eli and nudged her with her shoulder. “Hey there, girl.”

  “Hey. Cady, this is one of the guests at my house, Sarah. Sarah, this is Cady. She owns the hardware store in town.”

  “Nice to meet you.” Sarah reached across Eli and offered her hand.

  Once numbers were called, Eli was focused on Judy and only Judy. She pressed her stamp onto the cards one after the other, cursing silently when bingo was called on the other side of the room. They all swept up their cards. Eli put a hand on Sarah’s shoulder. “I’m going to get us a couple more.”

  When she got back to the table, Cady and Sarah were deep in conversation and Sarah had taken over Eli’s chair. She took Sarah’s still-warm seat. Shifting in it, she set out their cards in front of them just before the call went out for the second round to start.

  As numbers started to be called, Sarah leaned closer to Eli and whispered, “So if all the proceeds go to the school, what does the winner get?”

  “Bragging rights,” Eli muttered, her stomach twisting with how close Sarah was.

  “Makes sense I guess.”

  Eli risked turning her head, finding Sarah even closer than she’d originally thought. Luckily, Judy called the next number, and Eli had to find it on both her cards, and Sarah’s since Sarah wasn’t paying attention. She marked Sarah’s one card that had it and leaned back in her chair. A different kind of smile played on Sarah’s lips, and Eli wasn’t sure what it meant, but it sent a thrill through her stomach and up and down her spine.

  Judy called the next number, and Eli had to blink and work hard to focus on what was said. Hunching over her card, she skimmed her gaze over it until she gave up searching. Whatever number Judy had said, she’d forgotten it already.

  “Here,” Sarah whispered as she moved her stamp close to Eli’s and pressed it to the card on the left. “You missed it.”

  “Thanks,” Eli muttered.

  Managing to keep her distance until the next round, Eli replaced their cards, but as she went to sit down, she was surprised to see Bridget standing by the door of the building, staring directly at her. With her breath tight in her lungs, Eli stared back, curious as to what Bridget would do and what she wanted. With a jerk of her head, Bridget indicated she wanted to talk outside.

  Eli leaned in close to Sarah, a hand on her shoulder with a tender squeeze. “I’ll be right back. Play my card until then, would you?”

  “Sure.”

  Sarah gave her a confused look, but Eli said nothing else as she stalked toward the back door. Bridget had already slipped outside. She had a feeling she knew what this was about and that she wasn’t going to like the conversation.

  As soon as the door was shut and the sounds of the building muted, Eli knew she’d made a mistake coming out there. Bridget’s dark hair was pulled into a loose bun at the back of her head, her shirt was tight over her breasts, and her dark jeans were the ones that made Eli take a second look every time.

  “What’s wrong, Bridget?”

  “I…I wanted to talk.”

  “What about?” Eli clenched her jaw and crossed her arms over her chest. “Because we haven’t talked in two years.”

  “We’ve talked.”

  “Not about what I’m sure this conversation is going to be about.”

  Bridget bit her lip and lowered her lashes, having the decency to look a little sheepish. While Sarah clearly did it out of a bad nervous habit, Bridget was trying to be coy—and failing, because Eli had been down that road several times, and she was tired of it.

  “I just…don’t you ever wonder what if?”

  “No.” Eli’s voice was firm.

  Bridget ignored her. “What if we were still together? What if it had worked out?”

  Scoffing, Eli dug her toe into the ground and dragged Bridget farther down the outside wall of the building and away from prying eyes. “We have been through this. We know why it ended.”

  “Yeah.” Bridget moved to stare directly up at Eli. “But what if it didn’t?”

  “Where is this even coming from? Two years is a long time to just suddenly up and change your mind.”

  “My mind?” Bridget’s voice rose.

  Eli shushed her. “Yes, your mind. My mind’s been made up for quite some time.”

  Bridget rubbed her lips together, and then suddenly, she stepped forward, her hands coming out to grasp Eli’s, twining their fingers together. “I still love you.”

  Eli’s heart stuttered. Did she still love Bridget? Yes. Would she always? Probably. But that didn’t mean they should be together or that it was in any way a good idea for them to start back where they left off. They left off for good reasons.

  “I’m not doing this.”

  “Because you have someone new?” Anger laced Bridget’s voice.

  “Excuse me? Is that what this is all about? You’re jealous? Let me remind you, Bridget, you broke up with me. You refused me, and you did it in a spectacular fashion, so don’t come here thinking that I have moved on with my life just to try to get you back. I don’t want you anymore.”

  “They why do you still look at me like that?”

  “Like what?” Exasperation filled Eli’s chest. This was what she had hated about dating her. The twisted words and comments, the assumptions. They’d grown up together, and Eli should have been smart enough to remember elementary school. Bridget hadn’t changed at all.

  “Like you want to kiss me.”

  “Holy shit. I do not, under any circumstances, want to kiss you.”

  “You sure about that?” Bridget stepped closer, and Eli realized all too late their hands were still entwined. She tried to move away, but her foot caught on something. She looked down to see what it was, and when her gaze moved back up, Bridget was there, their lips mashed together, a hand sliding behind Eli’s neck and holding her still.

  “Eli?” Sarah’s voice was a welcome relief.

  Eli pulled as far away from Bridget as she could get, and when Eli turned fully to face Sarah, all she felt was complete calm and ease. Sarah raised an eyebrow in their direction.

  “That round’s over.”

  “Already?” Eli asked as she stepped away from Bridget and down the sidewalk toward Sarah.

  “Yeah.”

  Eli wanted to reach her hand out to grasp Sarah’s, to take it and have some kind of human contact that wasn’t manipulative, that wasn’t dangerous, but was calm and soothing and would center her. She’d have to figure out why she thought of Sarah that way later, but for now, being closer to Sarah would have to do. Sarah, instead of opening the door and going inside, stopped when Eli reached her.

  “You ready to go?” Sarah asked.

  “Yes.” Eli let out a sigh, all the tension in her shoulders vanishing. “Let’s go.”

  When they got into the truck, Eli turned the lights on and sighed, closing her eyes and pinching the bridge of her nose. She wasn’t quite sure what to say to Sarah, if anything, for the rescue. When Sarah remained quiet, Eli pulled out of the makeshift grass parking lot with a curt “Thanks” on her lips before heading toward the highway. The rest of the drive was made in silence.

  Chapter 12

  Sarah hadn’t talked Eli since they’d gotten back from the bingo game last night, and surprisingly, Eli had remained utterly silent for the entire drive to the house. Eli wasn’t always the biggest talker, but it was rare they were in complete silence. She usually shared a story or two about the houses and farms they passed.

  Eli had gone out early that morning with the sunrise, and Sarah hadn’t seen her since. She also hadn’t slept much since then. The image of Bridget pressed up against Eli—who was obviously uncomfortable stuck between the woman she’d been avoiding and the building itself—would not escape her mind.

  She had seen how tense Eli had become within an instant of seeing Bridget, felt how she’d morphed almost entirely into someone else. When Bridget had beckoned Eli over and Eli hadn’t even hesitated at the silent communication, the pit of Sarah’s stomach had done something funny. It wasn’t anxiety she had felt, per se. It had been an intense need to protect—which was odd, considering she barely knew Eli.

  Sarah sipped a cup of hot tea and stared out the large bay window in the den to the fields below. Her chest had tightened like she’d expected it to, but it wasn’t for any reason concerning herself. Her entire being had been focused on Eli and Eli’s needs.

  Sarah hadn’t taken long before she’d abandoned her bingo cards on the table and went to find Eli, and she’d been glad she had. Again, the image of Eli struggling to get free—her tense shoulders, her set face, her fingers clenched at her sides—plagued her. The thought of Eli with Bridget made her chest hurt to the point that she rubbed the spot in the center with the heel of her hand and closed her eyes.

  No matter what, she couldn’t say she wasn’t at least fond of Eli. They’d come to a quiet understanding about each other, it seemed, and Sarah didn’t want that to go away because of an ex-girlfriend who clearly didn’t understand the “ex” part of that statement.

  She still wasn’t quite sure what had happened between the two of them to break them up in the first place and certainly didn’t understand what had happened last night, but Eli’s quiet utterance of thanks as they’d pulled away from the 4H building had been enough to tell Sarah she had done the right thing.

  Scooping Eli into a hug and running her fingers through her hair in a soothing manner had been a very pervasive thought in her mind. Sarah shook her head as she sighed. She had one week left at Indigo, and she couldn’t go dreaming up fantasies with cowgirls she’d never see again, although it certainly was fun to dream, something she had been doing quite often since she’d arrived.

  It was near one o’clock when she’d finished a small lunch and headed upstairs for her guitar. She needed to do something with her hands, and as much as she wanted to go out into the fields and find Eli, she was pretty sure Eli wanted the time to herself.

  With her guitar in hand, her notebook of chicken scratches next to her on the couch cushion, and her hair pulled back into a haphazard pony that barely held it anymore without strands falling out, she went to work on finishing her song.

  Sarah lost herself in her music, like she did most anytime she was creating something. When she hit the last chord on her guitar and her voice echoed through the den, a tear dripped down her cheek. She knew she’d hit it perfectly. Everything about the song was on point, at least for now.

  Wiping her hand across her cheeks and pressing her fingers on the bridge of her nose, Sarah let out a shuddering breath. It would be perfect when they could add in everything else—piano, perhaps some stringed instruments. She’d work on writing that music later. Until then, she was satisfied with what she had.

  Taking the risk, Sarah reached for her phone and called Kara. She knew Kara had a flexible work schedule, which often meant she was available to take calls at random times of the day, but she also never knew when Kara would be with a client. Luckily, Kara picked up on the first ring.

  “You’ve been quiet.”

  Sarah snorted. “Not a whole lot to do out here, you know. Not to mention, there isn’t very good cell phone service either.”

  “So it was a good choice then.”

  “Yes, yes, I think it was.”

  Kara paused. “You seem lost.”

  Nodding, Sarah curled her feet up under her on the couch as she leaned into the arm and stared out the window, wishing she would see Eli’s old farm truck coming up the road. “A bit, yes. It’s been a busy few days.”

  “Tell me all about it.”

  “You’ve got time?”

  “For you? Always.”

  That made Sarah smile. Kara was always there for her, no matter what. Rubbing her hand along her thigh, her fingertips brushing over the skinny jeans she loved to wear, Sarah wasn’t quite sure where to start. Once again, the image of Eli and Bridget entered her mind unbidden, but she pushed it away, knowing if she did share about that, Kara would think something else was going on.

  “I learned to drive a stick shift.”

  “You’re kidding.”

  “No, I’m not. By the way, I have no desire to ever own one. That is way too complicated.”

  “Yeah, but you’re one step closer to riding bikes with us now that you at least understand the concept of a clutch.”

  Sarah smiled. “Maybe someday I will let you teach me how to ride a motorcycle.”

  “Not someday, Sarah. When you get back. Come on, it’ll be fun.”

  “I’m leaving almost immediately after I return.”

  “Then we’ll make the time.”

  “Yeah.” The faraway tone was back in her voice, she knew. Her derailing of the conversation had only taken her so far because no matter what she did or how she tried to distract herself, she could not get Eli off her mind, and she wondered briefly what she was doing out in the fields that day.

  “Have you done any writing?”

  “Oh, a bit. I wrote a song about a cow.”

  “About Buddy?”

  “Yeah.” Sarah grinned. “Want to hear it? I doubt it’ll ever be on an album.”

  “Yes!” Kara’s response was enthusiastic.

  “I’ll warn you, it’s still pretty rough.”

  “Shut up and sing, woman.”

  Chuckling, Sarah shifted in her seat and picked up the guitar. She put her phone on speaker and settled it by her notebook so she could look over and read the lyrics she’d jotted down.

  It didn’t take her long to get through it because she hadn’t worked out if she wanted to add a bridge or how many times she wanted to repeat the chorus at the end. When the last note on her guitar faded, she was perplexed by the silence on the other end of the line.

  Furrowing her brow, Sarah picked up her phone and brought it to her ear. “You still there, Kara?”

  “Yeah.” Kara cleared her throat. “Yeah, I’m here.”

  “Well, what’d you think?”

  “You think that song is about a cow?”

  Sarah’s shoulders tensed. She found her gaze going out the window. “Yeah. It’s about Buddy.”

  Again, the pause was drawn out. “I don’t think that’s a song about a cow, Sarah.”

  “It is. What else would it be about?”

  “Have you even listened to your own song?” The accusation took her by surprise.

  Sarah pushed the guitar off her legs and stood up, moving to the window to stare out at the fields surrounding the house. If she squinted, she could see the main road that came off the highway, but she loved how isolated it was out there.

  “Sarah.”

  “What?” she asked.

  “Did you hear me?”

  “Yeah, I heard you, and yes, I listened to my own song. I wrote the damn thing.”

  “Just making sure, but it’s not about a cow.”

  “It is.”

  “It’s not.”

  “It is.” Frustration built in her chest, and for the first time ever, she regretted calling her best friend—if only because Kara said what she had been thinking in the first place but absolutely did not want to admit. Unfortunately, she didn’t really have an excuse to get off the call either, and she could only hope one of Kara’s clients popped up and needed something.

  Kara sighed. “I miss you.”

  “I miss you, too.” Sarah’s comment was genuine. She did miss Kara, and she missed being home and with her friends and in the routine of life, but Kara had been right. The break before the tour had been a welcome respite. She hadn’t once thought of what needed to get done before she left, what loose ends she needed to wrap up. She’d practiced her music, of course, but that was about it. Everyone had seemed to take her request for what it was and leave her alone the past week. But she had her doubts that would last into the next week as time got shorter.

  “Call me tonight, all right?”

  “If I can, yeah. I didn’t sleep, so I’m going to try and crash for a few hours.”

  “Why didn’t you sleep?”

  Sarah knew why, the image unbidden in her mind, but she wasn’t about to share that with Kara, not after the comment about the song. “You know me.”

  “Yeah.” Kara sighed. “Maybe tonight you’ll sleep.”

  “Maybe.”

  “I’ll talk to you soon, okay?”

  “Yeah.” The ball of nerves in Sarah’s stomach grew. “I’ll talk to you soon. Love you.”

  “Love you, too.”

  When she’d finished the call, Sarah dropped the phone onto the couch and let out a long sigh. Crossing her arms over her chest, she lost herself in thoughts of Eli. Letting Eli consume her mind for another week wouldn’t harm anything, right? It wasn’t like they were going to go any further in a relationship, not with what Sarah had seen the night before or what she’d seen of Eli before then, but she could at least take the friendship Eli did offer for what it was, couldn’t she?