“And you are always welcome here, Sarah.”

  “As what?” Sarah’s voice rose, and she knew Eli was going to be embarrassed if the family upstairs heard their argument, but she couldn’t stop it, couldn’t hold back. “What am I to you, Eli? Because you have never really shared that.”

  Eli’s face remained blank, not that Sarah could read it anyway. Sarah shoved her bare feet into her boots and grabbed her jacket from the floor. Anger was the only emotion she could focus on because if she thought about the hurt, she would shatter into a million little pieces.

  “I need a walk.” She started up the stairs when Eli’s voice stopped her.

  “Don’t go too far. We’re supposed to get a storm.”

  “Wonderful.” Sarah stomped out of the basement and out of the house. As soon as the cold breeze hit her face and she was off the deck and down by the barn, she let the tears fall from her eyes. If this didn’t work, she didn’t know what would.

  Eli wouldn’t say she hadn’t expected Sarah to bring up a more serious relationship, but she had hoped they could have an entire visit without it. She didn’t have an answer. She’d wanted more time to figure everything out, to find the balance neither of them had.

  They were both consumed by work, her by the ranch and the farm, Sarah by music and touring and whatever she did with albums. Eli wasn’t even sure why they still called them that anymore. Defeat swarmed her. She sat down heavily on her bed, still naked with the blanket wrapped around her, still warm from Sarah’s body against her. Closing her eyes, Eli could still feel Sarah moving in her.

  She wanted so much to have a relationship with her, to be with her, to live the dream they both seemed to have, but every time the moment came, she chickened out. The running assumption from her and from Bill—because who else was she going to talk to—was Bridget. But that really wasn’t why she was hesitating. Bridget was Bridget, and she’d figure that out no matter what happened, but Eli wasn’t holding off because of her.

  No, she was holding off because she could not fathom how any of it would work. Sarah lived in Dallas. Her life and her world, everything was in Dallas. Eli had no idea how much time it took to record an album, but she suspected it was a lot. It wasn’t just the tours and the concerts that would keep Sarah away from Indigo, it was her life, her career, everything that was her.

  And everything that was Eli was at Indigo.

  She didn’t like to travel, she didn’t want to go to far off places and see new things, she didn’t want to lose her businesses, her cattle, her farm.

  This was stupid. Eli sprung to her feet and shucked the blanket. She grabbed her clothes, dressing as quickly as she could. If she wasn’t going to take a chance and see how it would work, then she was as bad as Bridget had been. She wouldn’t lose out on having Sarah in her life because she was too stupid to take a risk.

  By the time she reached the deck, the storm was far closer than she’d thought it’d be. Searching the grounds nearby for Sarah, she saw nothing. Eli stepped off the deck and into the brutal wind. Hunching against it, she took the winding path down to the barn.

  The animals inside were restless, but that wasn’t unusual with a storm brewing. Eli called out into the dark barn. “Sarah, you in here?”

  When she didn’t get an answer, Eli turned to head back out the door. She stopped short when Sarah stood directly in front of her. With a hand against her racing heart, Eli let out a breath.

  “You scared the crap out of me.”

  “Sorry,” Sarah answered. “I didn’t mean to. I didn’t want to get caught in the storm.”

  “We should head up to the house so we don’t.”

  “Probably.”

  Neither of them moved. Sarah looked tired, good and truly tired in a way she hadn’t seen since the night they’d first met. Building her gumption, Eli prepared herself to speak, but Sarah put a hand out to stop her.

  “Don’t say it if you don’t mean it, Eli. I don’t want platitudes.”

  “Would you shut up?”

  Sarah raised a singular eyebrow.

  “Thank you. You can’t just show up on my doorstep unannounced, fuck me senseless in two seconds flat, and expect my brain to keep up for this kind of conversation. Unlike you, Sarah, I don’t move at the speed of light. I take a much longer gander around the field before I decide where I’m going to graze.”

  “What?” Sarah shook her head.

  “I needed time to catch up with what you were even saying. You can’t tell me that we haven’t been going at whatever this is like we’ve jumped in the fast lane. Two months. I have literally known you two months, and of those two months, we have spent barely any time together.”

  “I can’t—”

  “Shush.” Eli put her hand up. “It’s my turn to talk.”

  Sarah conceded again.

  Shoving her hands into her pockets, Eli stared Sarah down. “Why did you come here?”

  “I wanted to see you.”

  “Only to see me?”

  “Well, and to have this talk, because I really didn’t want to have it over the phone or by text. And I needed to see you, Eli. I need you.”

  Eli stepped closer to Sarah, gripping her fingers and squeezing lightly. “I want a relationship with you, but I’m struggling a whole lot with the logistics of how we’re going to even attempt to make it work. You know I don’t travel.”

  “I know. I know.” Sarah stepped in. “I told you, I’ll do it. I’ll find time and days off, and I’ll come out here even if it is only one or two days here and there. We have built in breaks for everyone, and I’ll come then, too. I want this to work, Eli, and I’m going to put in as much effort as I can to make that happen.”

  Eli nodded in the slightest. “I know you will. I trust you will. I just worry. I worry it won’t be enough, I worry you’ll get burned out and tired, and I worry it won’t be worth it for you.”

  Sarah stepped straight up to her, wrapping her arms around Eli’s shoulders and tugging her in for a hug. She dropped kisses onto Eli’s cheeks, rubbing her hands up and down her shoulders and her arms. “You are so very much worth it, don’t ever doubt that.”

  Eli nodded, moving to draw Sarah deeper into the embrace and holding her arms tight around Sarah’s hips. She buried her face in Sarah’s neck, drawing in her scent, memorizing it. Slowly letting out a breath that hitched with unshed tears, Eli cupped Sarah’s cheek and brought her in for a kiss.

  “So let’s figure this out,” Sarah whispered.

  “Yes, but first let’s get to the house.”

  “Sounds like a good idea.”

  Eli took Sarah by the hand and dragged her outside. Raindrops were already falling, the wind whipping them hard against their faces. Eli dragged Sarah up the trail toward the house, the rain dumping on them when they were no more than four steps from the deck. As soon as they got under the porch, Eli shivered and Sarah wrapped her arms around her, bringing their mouths together in a long, slow kiss.

  “How many hours am I down to now?” Eli whispered.

  “Thirty-two.”

  “We better make the most of them.”

  “Sounds like we agree.”

  When Eli pulled away, she had a wicked glint to her eye. Kissing Sarah’s cheek, she pinched her butt. “Guess that means you’re making dinner.”

  Sarah rolled her eyes and tangled their fingers together. “Only if you help.”

  They headed inside, Sarah and Eli cooking while the family’s daughter asked Sarah all kinds of questions about her life, some pointed and boundary pressing while others were far more benign. Eli was impressed with how Sarah deflected most of them, but when the girl asked if Eli was the one the song was written about, no one could mistake the blush in Sarah’s cheeks as she admitted yes.

  Their hours dwindled fast, but Sarah and Eli made the most of them. When Eli watched the rental drive off, they had a plan in place for when Sarah would come back, how often she would visit, and how long she would stay. They were going to try, and Eli supposed it was more important that they were both willing to sacrifice to make it work.

  Chapter 20

  Eli picked Sarah up at the airport this time, wanting the extra three hours together they could get from the drive, but as soon as Sarah emerged from the airport, Eli knew it was going to be quiet. Months of Sarah flying back and forth at every opportunity was certainly taking its toll.

  Every time Sarah had come, she’d seemed more and more exhausted, she had slept more and more, and she’d been lazier. Not that Eli minded. She rather enjoyed lying around with Sarah at every opportunity. Summer was coming to a close, and this was Eli’s easiest time except that auctions would be picking up soon, and she’d be traveling to other parts of the state to sell the cattle she had raised.

  Sarah was supposed to be done with touring by that time, but they hadn’t really talked about what they’d be doing or if Sarah would be coming with her. Eli had no idea. As soon as she pulled out onto the highway, Sarah yawned.

  “I slept on the plane. I swear I did.”

  “Sleep on the drive. It’s fine.” Eli gave her a wan smile. Reaching over she ran her hand up and down Sarah’s arm to comfort and soothe her.

  Hiding her yawn behind her hand, Sarah’s eyes watered. “No, I want to spend time with you. And sleeping time does not count as time, before you say anything.”

  “I didn’t say it.” Eli’s lips tugged upward.

  “You were thinking it.”

  “You didn’t say I couldn’t think it.” Teasing, Eli grabbed Sarah’s hand and tugged slightly. “Sleep though. Then we can do other things later.”

  “You make a good point.” Sarah yawned again. “I’m so sorry.”

  “Sarah, please—rest, sleep, whatever. We can talk and spend time together when we get home.”

  Her heart clenched. There was no way Sarah had seen her own apartment in Dallas the entire time she’d been on tour. She’d spent more time with Eli than she did anywhere else, and yet for some reason, the word home where it concerned Sarah seemed almost perfect.

  Sarah leaned in and kissed Eli’s cheek before she curled into the door and closed her eyes. Eli turned the music down on the radio, and waited patiently for Sarah to fall asleep, which didn’t take long. As she drove toward the house, she couldn’t help but wonder what their relationship would look like after Sarah’s tour was over. Surely she’d have something else to do, like recording a new album or setting up another tour.

  They had talked every day, usually multiple times a day while Sarah was gone. Every conversation had ended with the topic of when they would see each other next. The soft sound of Sarah’s breathing was a comfort, but she was still concerned with how truly exhausted Sarah looked. She wasn’t even sure if Sarah recognized it.

  Her truck hit a bump as she moved through the backroads, going from one highway to the next in a quicker, more efficient route. She’d taught Sarah that route about the third time she’d come back to visit. It cut off about ten minutes of driving time, which wasn’t much in the scheme of things.

  As her own business had ramped up at the B&B over the summer months like it always did, Eli had known it would be harder finding time for Sarah when she did come to visit. She was still curious what would happen at the end of Sarah’s tour, which they still hadn’t talked about.

  Eli focused on the drive. As soon as she pulled up outside the house, she leaned over and shook Sarah awake. She was met with sleepy eyes, flushed cheeks, and a confused stare until Sarah’s brain caught up with her body.

  “We there?”

  “Yeah.” Eli brushed her fingers over Sarah’s cheek before she pushed herself to sit up more. “Feel better?”

  “A little.”

  That meant “not much.” She could see it—the weariness, the exhaustion, the struggle to keep up with all the traveling and the plane rides. Sarah hadn’t good and truly taken a break since those first two weeks when they’d met.

  Eli grabbed Sarah’s carry-on bag and walked hand-in-hand with her into the house. Opening the door, she dragged Sarah down to the basement and rolled into bed with her after dropping her bag onto the floor by the door. Sarah had brought a guitar with her the second time she came around, and just left it in the den for whenever she wanted to use it, but even the last few times she’d come she hadn’t dared pick it up.

  Leaning into the headboard, Eli let Sarah snuggle into her side and fall back asleep. She smoothed her hands over her hair and back, letting her fingers slide as gently as she could. She had to do something different. They both did. There was no way Sarah could keep up that amount of travel without a break. They needed to find a better way to make it work, and Eli was pretty sure she knew the solution, as much as she didn’t want to admit it.

  After an hour, Eli slipped from the bed and went upstairs to make her current guests dinner, having decided to add that option since Sarah had sent her foolproof recipes. She slipped the casserole dish into the oven before she headed out to the barn to check on everything there. She was going to have to do a roundup of her cattle soon and take them to auction. She filled out paperwork, got everything organized, and figured out what week she was going to be gone. Rubbing her lips together, she sighed.

  Inside the house at her desk, Eli went through her guest registrations, finding the one week without anyone booked. Immediately, she blocked it so no one could reserve a room from her. It was time for her to take the next step. Picking up the landline, Eli called the one person she knew could help.

  He answered on the second ring. “Hey, baby.”

  “Hey Daddy.” Her heart melted. His deep, sweet tones always soothed her nerves. “How’s everything going in Arizona?”

  “Wonderfully. Your mom’s just out walking the dog.”

  “Ah.” Eli’s nerves strained. She wasn’t even sure what to say to him or how to ask him for help. She hadn’t really talked with him much about Sarah, which was odd for her. Normally every girlfriend she’d had that had meant anything, she’d been all about sharing with him, but for some reason, she’d wanted to keep Sarah to herself, to revel in the relationship they were building before bringing anyone else in and spoiling their little world.

  “How’s the ranch?”

  “Good. Getting ready to go to auction in a couple weeks. Bill said he’d help me do the roundup.”

  “He loves a good cattle drive.”

  A smile lit on Eli’s lips, but it didn’t reach her eyes. “Yeah, he does. Do you and mom have plans for the coming month?”

  “No. We weren’t going to visit anyone until the start of fall. You know summers. We try to lay low while everyone else travels.”

  “Yeah. Do you think…would you mind coming up here for a week or two?”

  “In the summer? Isn’t the house pretty full during the summer?”

  Eli’s heart raced, beating rapidly. “I blocked off a week.”

  “When?”

  “Second week of September.”

  There was a pregnant pause on the other end of the line. “Why?”

  “I want to take a trip.”

  Her dad sighed heavily. Eli bounced her heel on the floor. She should probably just have called her mom and asked that way. She’d understand more, maybe—hopefully.

  “I just…remember me telling you about Sarah?”

  “Yeah. Is it serious?”

  “Yes.” The word left Eli’s lips before she really had formed an answer. It was. She wasn’t lying. Everything in her world had shifted since she’d met Sarah, since they’d taken the final barrier down and started their odd little relationship. “I want to go visit her.”

  “Where does she live again?”

  “Uh…Dallas. But she won’t be in Dallas.”

  “What?”

  She realized far too late she hadn’t fully explained who Sarah was. Eli picked up a pen from her desk and fiddled with it. “Sarah is Sadie Bade, you know, the singer.”

  “You’re dating a musician?”

  “Uh…yeah. Anyway, she’s on tour right now. And I was hoping to take a trip for the last week of her tour and stay with her instead of having her come here. She’s getting really tired with all of it—not that she’d admit it because she’s stubborn like that and made the commitment so she’ll come here if she thinks that’s what needs to happen—but I have to give a little too, you know?”

  “I know.” The tender tone in his voice took her by surprise.

  Eli narrowed her gaze as she stared at the computer. “What do you mean ‘I know?’”

  “Why do you think I’m in Arizona, Elijah? It’s not because I like living in the desert, I can assure you that.”

  Eli had never really thought of that. Her parents had always talked about selling or passing on the farm at some point when she was a kid and moving to a bigger city where there were more things to do and people to see—and warmer weather. It had never occurred to her that it had been some sort of compromise.

  “When do you want us to come?”

  “Whenever you can? I’ve got auction in a couple weeks, after that it’s just the usual stuff, and I closed out booking for the B&B so you wouldn’t have to deal with that.”

  “Open it back up.”

  “What?”

  “Elijah, I love you. And if you really think this girl is the one, that she is worth it, Mom and I will help you figure out how to make it work. It’s not going to be easy. No relationship ever is. We’ve always talked about finding ways to help you three make everything work for the best, supporting you in whatever you needed. If this is what you need, then we’ll be there.”

  “Really?” Her eyes budded with tears.

  “Yes. Besides, Bill tells me this girl has completely stolen all your attention and you keep letting Cassie get the best of you.”

  Eli snorted and wiped the back of her hand under her eyes. “I fixed the damn fence.”

  “Well, I’ll have to see for myself if that’s true.”

  “You do that.”

  “I plan on it. Text Mom the dates, and we’ll book a flight up to see you and watch over the place for a bit.”