“And I can trust you to release me unharmed if I don't choose you?”

  “I'm a god, Elaria,” he said with a wry twist of his lips. “I may desire you more than anyone else, but I am not without options. If you don't want me, I don't want you in my life. I will find another, I have no doubt.”

  I chuckled. “Well said, Morning Star. And thank you for that. You now seem a lot less like a crazy deity and more like a real person.”

  “Telling you that I can replace you makes me sound real?” His voice went skeptical. “I thought it might upset you.”

  “As you said; it's been a day,” I reminded him. “Talking about touching souls and becoming your consort after a single day is kind of insane. Besides, you do realize that I'm married, don't you?”

  “What?” His jaw dropped.

  “I'm engaged to two men, mated to a third, dating a fourth, and married to the fifth,” I said. “Banning and I were married just a few days ago.”

  “Days,” he whispered. “I missed you by days. That's sad indeed.”

  I started to feel relieved, thinking he was giving up his suit.

  “But marriages are dissolved all the time,” Lucifer added. “Gods do not limit themselves to such mortal bindings. And even though your consorts offer you great power, it's nothing compared to what I can give you. You've felt me share my magic with you; you know I can give you back your goddesshood, Elaria. Not only that, but I can also teach you how to retain who you are in the process. I think you will see the light in time... my light.”

  With that lovely gem, the Morning Star shut the door.

  Chapter Thirty-Four

  Despite Lucifer's insistence that I was free to move about Heaven, I remained in my suite that night. Frankly, I was exhausted and enjoyed the peace. A female angel brought me dinner so I didn't have to join the resident angels in the dining hall. She nodded respectfully to me as I held the door open for her and then introduced herself as Marjorie.

  “Marjorie?” I asked with a smirk. “Not Marjoriel?”

  “I'm from a later generation,” she said sweetly. “The older ones have god in their names.”

  “God in their names?”

  “L for Lucifer,” she explained as she took the tray into the little dining room off my bedroom. “They added an E before the L to distinguish the extension from God's letter. There's more to it than that, but I don't remember all the reasons anymore. Just that his name begins with L so when he named the first of us, he ended their names with the same letter; beginning and end.”

  “Alpha and Omega,” I said with a snicker.

  “Yes; precisely.” She grinned at my amusement. “Most of those who followed kept up the tradition but after Lucifer was imprisoned by the old ones, we stopped adding his name to ours.”

  “The power of words,” I murmured as I sat at the dining table.

  “Indeed,” she agreed, suddenly somber. “And we didn't want to give him any more than we already had.”

  Marjorie set out the food and drinks for me on the four-seater round table; a polished wood top with an elaborate gold pedestal of curlicues and cherubs. An Art Nouveau inspired chandelier hung above me, dripping crimson beads like blood from its frosted-glass flame lights. The velvet drapes swung back from a window to my right, giving me a view of the skyline and the mountains beyond. I kept my gaze there. It felt awkward to sit in my throne-like chair while Marjorie laid out my food and filled glasses with water and wine. I tried to just stay out of her way. But then she laid a napkin in my lap, and I leaned back in surprise. Talk about service.

  “Enjoy your meal, Spellsinger,” she said with an intense look.

  I frowned after her as my hands fell into my lap. Something crunched beneath them. I clenched them into fists in surprise but didn't show any other reaction. Then, carefully, I lifted the edge of the napkin and saw a folded paper. A message was scrawled across the top; He's listening.

  My heart sped up, but I didn't panic. I had suspected that Lucifer was watching me—that there were hidden angel cams in the suite—which was why I hadn't overtly reacted to the letter. Knowing he was listening instead of watching was a small relief. It still proved that I couldn't trust him—and that he didn't trust me—but it was better than knowing I had no privacy. I'd had enough of that in my zone cell.

  I opened the letter and read:

  The Prince of Lies is deceiving you. He only wants you for your power and connection to Earth. Once Angelus is under his heel, he will use you to conquer your home planet. We will help you escape if we can. Stay vigilant and prepare.

  The Watchers

  I folded up the letter and stared at my meal. The Watchers? Weren't those the Angels who are supposed to watch over humans? Hence the name. The ones who went a little too far, got a bit obsessed, and had babies with human women? They fathered the Nephilim. But those were only stories; I'd never met a Nephilim or anyone who had. So, who were the Watchers really?

  My stomach roiled and rumbled; gone sour as acid filled my mouth. I knew all Lucifer's talk about finding me so wonderful and irresistible had been too sudden to be real. But the way we had connected when I freed him, combined with the earnest look in his eyes, had made me second guess myself. Even now, with the warning in my hands, I remembered what his soul felt like and wondered if this was just a plot to turn me against him. Demons could be vicious, but Angels were shrewd. I sighed deeply as I realized there was no one on the entire planet who I could trust.

  You still have me, my love, Kyanite reassured me. And I am not without my skills. The Angels love their jewels, there is bound to be some kyanite here, and when I find it, I will use it to spy on them and their god. I will find the truth for you.

  Thank you, Ky.

  I am inside you, Elaria; we are one. I will never betray you.

  I know. And I have never been more grateful for that.

  I love you too. Kyanite's presence faded.

  I assumed Ky left to search the palace, and with his departure, I breathed a sigh of relief. I had every faith that he would discover the truth behind the letter in my lap and the god who professed to want only peace and love.

  With my stomach settled and my confidence renewed, I could eat. I did, every bite, then showered and went to bed; resting with the surety that the morning would bring answers. But when sunlight blared through my window and tantalized me awake, Kyanite was still missing. I frowned and called for him, but he didn't answer. It wasn't until I was dressed that he returned.

  There is not a sliver of kyanite in this entire palace! Kyanite immediately launched into his report.

  What? How is that possible?

  It's not. What it is, is very suspicious. I believe Lucifer had the palace cleaned.

  That would be very devious indeed, I noted.

  He was known to be such.

  What about the rest of Heaven? You were gone awhile; did you find any stones in the city?

  Yes; in that, I was successful, he said. And the news is not good.

  Tell me.

  The Host is unhappy. Despite Lucifer's assurances, they are agitated and afraid. They know their history with their god better than most races; the humans kept Lucifer alive for them. They know he's a master manipulator, and they're wary.

  I assumed so after I read that letter. What else did you hear?

  They want you gone. They think he'll use your spellsinging as a weapon; a way to conquer without invasion or bloodshed. Without barely any effort on his part at all.

  I'm torn, Ky. Part of me agrees with them, but another part of me remembers how misunderstood I was when I was Faenestra. I truly wanted the best for the Shining Ones, but they attacked me and brought the worst out of me. If Lucifer wants to regain control without bloodshed, I fail to see the horror in that.

  The horror isn't the way he wants to win, it's the way he wants to use you to do it; as if you're a weapon that makes him indomitable, Kyanite protested. The Angels are talking about Lucifer's past; the lovers he's had and how none of them have survived.

  Go on.

  He's been on a quest for the perfect mate from the very beginning. But when a woman falls short of his high standards—which she inevitably does—he doesn't just break up with her, he consumes her.

  Consumes? A shiver ran over my body.

  Lucifer's magic is rare, even among Gods; he can portion it out to share with those he deems worthy. But there's a catch; literally. His magic, once settled inside you, hooks into your magic and establishes a link between you. Lucifer keeps a tight hold of that link and can use it to take his magic back whenever he wishes. Except when he does, he'll pull your magic out along with his.

  Lucifer told me he could make me a goddess again. Horror shot through me. Was I vulnerable now? I had touched him; he had given me his magic.

  He didn't give you his magic, Kyanite reassured me. He empowered your magic with his; he touched your magic and your soul, I believe, but he didn't leave any of himself inside you.

  Why not? If it's all true, and he could simply take my spellsinging, why wouldn't he establish that link immediately? I would think he'd want to have the possibility available to him as soon as possible, and he's definitely had the chance. In fact, why not simply take my magic when I was still under his sway? He wouldn't need me anymore.

  From what I've learned, he cannot give you his magic without your consent.

  I breathed a sigh of relief; I definitely hadn't consented to that. All magic has rules; limitations.

  Even god magic, Kyanite agreed.

  So, Lucifer took his lovers' magic?

  And their lives with it, Kyanite said. It's unclear whether he took their magic and claimed it as his own or if he used it as fuel to make his stronger. Either way, they didn't survive.

  Shit.

  Yes. Once they fall short of his expectations, he has no patience for them. And no further use for them.

  I shivered, remembering the things Lucifer had said. Perhaps he had meant them, but that still didn't bode well for me. He had set the bar high, and if I didn't clear it, my failure could be fatal. Lucifer's love was a death sentence. But again, I wondered if I were being unfair. I was judging Lucifer on his past and the testimony of the people he'd hurt. Lucifer swore he'd changed and had asked me to allow him to prove it to me. Was I being as biased as the Shining Ones had been with me if I didn't give Lucifer a chance? It wasn't as if I hadn't tried to kill my lovers. I had no right to judge him.

  Do not give this god credit for your changes, Kyanite warned me. You lived as a human, Elaria. He was imprisoned in a lake of fire. Which of those do you truly think changes a person for the better?

  Fair enough, but who are we to say that negative conditions cannot make a person regret their actions? He seems so genuine. And how hypocritical would I be if I denied him the very open-mindedness I asked for from the Shining Ones?

  Fine; be open-minded but also be wary.

  I will. And I won't ever take magic from him.

  Good. I will be here to remind you of that promise.

  A knock at my door ended our conversation. I was surprised to find Raphael standing outside in the corridor. I narrowed my eyes at him, and his widened.

  “Is that you, Ellie?” Raphael asked hopefully. “Are you back?”

  “You mean after you cast me to your god like a sacrifice, and he bulldozed into my mind and made me a willing cohort in his conquering of Heaven?”

  “Holy shit, you are back!” He hugged me joyously.

  I stood stiffly within his embrace.

  “I'm sorry, El,” Raphael said as he moved back. “I truly believed that this was for the best.”

  “And that he could give me to you,” I growled.

  “Love isn't just blind; it's stupid,” he said apologetically. “I was an idiot.”

  “No shit.”

  “Your husband and consorts are alive,” he hurried to say. “They weren't hurt; I swear.”

  “I already know that.” I grimaced at him. “Lucifer returned my free will and gave me Kyanite back. Ky has already contacted my men. They were about to storm Heaven, but I told them to stand down.”

  “You did?” He gaped at me. “Why?”

  “Because Lucifer helped me put the other gods back to sleep in exchange for me staying here for two months,” I snapped.

  “You made a bargain with him?” Raphael whispered in shock.

  “Why does that surprise you?”

  “I thought you'd be the last person to make deals with the Devil.”

  “He's your god; you wanted him back,” I pointed out. “Are you saying that he's untrustworthy?”

  “No, not at all,” he protested. “But, as you said, he's my god, not yours. With your free will returned, I expected you to be more resistant.”

  “I think two months of my life in exchange for saving all the Realms was a fair trade,” I said. “I haven't given in to anything.”

  “Fair enough,” he conceded. “Look, Ellie, I went a little crazy, okay? I don't know what came over me. I just kept thinking about what we could have been together if I hadn't screwed up. And then Lucifer made me an offer, and I jumped on it. I wasn't thinking straight. I'm sorry I did this to you.”

  I grimaced and sighed deeply. “All right, Raph.” I went to sit on the loveseat at the foot of the bed. “Lucifer ended up helping us, and you didn't hurt my lovers or my friends. I guess I can forgive you.”

  “But not forget?” He gave me one of his signature smiles.

  “Not in this lifetime, Angel.” I gave him a hard look. “That was still a fucked up thing you did; a complete betrayal.”

  “I understand,” he said softly. “Look, Lucifer has given me time off today so I could come and apologize to you and perhaps take you out of the city for awhile if you felt up for it.”

  “He did?” I asked in surprise.

  “I did,” Lucifer said as he swept into the room.

  Both Raphael and I flinched.

  “Sorry to startle you.” Lucifer laughed and the sound of it rushed through my body and tingled in places it had no right going.

  My eyes immediately went to the deep V of his cerulean wrap shit; an ancient design with wide sleeves that ended just above his biceps. It was more vest than shirt and not only showed off his amazing arms, but also his perfect pectorals and the top of a divine six-pack. Loose, indigo pants hid his lower half but with so much of the top revealed, it didn't matter.

  “I just wanted to come by and apologize as well, Elaria,” Lucifer said. “I pushed you too far last night; said things that I shouldn't have. I've thought it over and realized that's not the man I want to be. I find you utterly mesmerizing, and I'm afraid it's made me overly aggressive. In short, I behaved boorishly.” He made a disgusted face. “A god should not be so uncivilized. Please forgive me.”

  “You're forgiven,” I said immediately.

  “Thank you, Elaria,” Lucifer said sincerely and with a bit of surprise. Then he turned to Raph. “I promised you a chance to win Elaria, and then I undermined your efforts by asking to court her myself. That isn't fair to either of you; two of the people who helped free me. So, I apologize to you as well, Raphael.”

  “You... you're apologizing to me?” Raphael stuttered.

  “It's why I've given you the day to yourselves,” Lucifer explained. “It's a way for me to make amends. Elaria, I want you to know that I preyed upon Raphael's desire for you. I was desperate; trapped and afraid. I saw the chance to escape, and I took it. I manipulated Raphael; entered his mind and turned his love into obsession.” He paused to swallow visibly. “I'm ashamed of that now, especially after how I behaved last night. If I want to be a fair and compassionate god, I cannot revert to my old ways. I must be diligent. I refuse to court you with trickery. So, I withdraw my suit and beg you to not judge Raphael harshly for my actions. He truly loves you.” Lucifer's eyes went tender. “I understand why now.”

  “Thank you, Lucifer,” Raphael said with shocked wonder.

  Lucifer nodded and gave us both a sad smile. “Please don't judge me so harshly either. I have my reasons for what I did, and as selfish as they were, I hope you can understand them.”

  “Trapped for centuries within an enchanted box, buried in a lake of fire,” I said with a nod. “Yeah; I understand using every trick available to you to win your freedom. I've been where you are, and I've been misjudged. I won't do the same to you.”

  Lucifer gaped at me as he rapidly blinked away a sheen over his stunning eyes. “Thank you, Elaria,” he whispered and then turned about and quietly left.