“Love you too,” she steps back moving toward the kitchen where I hear Sarah singing along with the Christmas music still playing throughout the sound system. “Hurry up, we’ve missed you.”

  Then she disappears and I hurry to get cleaned up so that I can get back to them.

  five

  Maddison

  I love this time of year. The time when we all come together to decorate and celebrate. I say that like the rest of the year isn't full of parties and celebration, because around here we honestly celebrate everything. I think Gran Jackson celebrated Sarah’s first tooth like she’d just discovered some hidden planet or something. It was cute and fun, and she insisted we go with a tooth fairy theme. Sarah loved it, truthfully I think we all did.

  Over the years I’ve come to the conclusion that nothing goes unnoticed in this family, we do not take things lightly and Gemma, she just loves a good family get together and uses everything she can to create one.

  Some may look at us and wonder how we are always together and can still stand each other. To me, I just have one great big crazy, full of love and chaos family. I love every single second of it, even when I feel like strangling one or all of them, I adore them too.

  “Mikey,” Colton laughs as he points at Mike's shirt. It’s funny to me how everyone still calls my husband Mikey like he’s an eight-year-old boy. The man is a monster, big, strong and looking at him you’d think he’s mean. Truth is Mike is the most loving, caring man I’ve ever met. He wears his heart on his sleeve, stands behind his family and friends so fiercely it can be overwhelming but this is the man I love. He’s the father of my daughter and maybe one day more, and I couldn’t have chosen a better man to share my life with.

  “Seriously man, your Santa needs to be holding a smaller box,” he points to Mike’s hideous sweater. “Like maybe a ring box, or possible even tinier.”

  The two of them argue back and forth in the middle of Grace and Terrance’s living room about the size of their ‘packages’. The rest of the guys heckle and taunt them, keeping the bickering going as they too laugh along at the shenanigans.

  Us ladies make our way to the kitchen where the drinks and food are all hidden.

  Grace is all over the kitchen, a little ball of nervous energy and both myself and Chloe watch her close. I can sense that Julian too is picking up on the ticking bomb.

  He looks at me, I raise a brow and he nods, his eyes narrowed like he’s focused and attempting to solve a puzzle.

  “Hey Gracie,” I say and immediately notice how her entire body tenses at the sound of her name. She doesn’t turn around to face us, her body still as she remains with her back to the entire room as she pretends to busy herself with what, I do not know.

  “Mmhm,” I barely hear the response and know without a doubt she is barely holding on.

  Grace has never been able to keep things bottled up. Yeah, maybe for a little bit, but with her she is the fine example of the saying the cup has runneth over. She takes in all she can, filling it up, until it reaches the rim, then all it takes in one last ounce and she is speaking, bursting at the seams and whatever it is she is holding back spews out like running water.

  Or maybe you could say she is an over-filled balloon. All I do know is once she starts, it’s impossible to stop her.

  “Are you going to join us?” I ask, flashing Julian a knowing smile. He knows her so well too, and together we make an unspoken plan with only one look, to make her pop.

  “Oh I will,” she insists, still wiping away at some imaginary mess on a counter that appears clean enough to eat off. “I just want to clean up these crumbs.”

  “What crumbs,” Julian asks.

  “Um,” she wipes, stops, then wipes again.

  “Please tell me that you and Terrance didn’t get busy on that counter.” Gretchen says with a laugh. “I swear you two have some type of goal to get naked on every single surface you can find in this place.”

  “Grace?” This time it's Chloe who makes an attempt. She remains seated at the end of the table closest to Grace, fighting a smile. “Is there a reason why you’ve refused to look at any of us longer than two-seconds and you’ve been exceptionally quiet tonight?”

  Now everyone is quietly awaiting Grace’s response, as we all watch.

  “I noticed that Terrance has been doing the hosting,” Chloe adds.

  “Am I missing something?” Kyra is sweet, and still fairly new to all our crazy asks. She is so incredibly sweet and the poor girl has no idea the second she marries Garrett, she is committing to a life of uncontrollable chaos and a nosy, nosy family.

  “Our sweet Grace can’t keep a secret from us, isn’t that right Gracie?” Julian pokes a little more.

  We are all coming at her, knowing she’s about to burst, but that is what we want. Secrets do not go over well in this family. The need to know overtakes all common sense and we will go to extremes to reveal that ugly little hush hush, right out of whoever is trying to betray us by keeping it.

  “Gracie,” Gretchen taunts, standing from the table and tiptoeing toward her. When she gets close Grace tries to escape and I go to move to block the other side, but Kyra of all people beats me to the punch. She moves in quickly, skidding to a stop as her socks slide along the tile floor. She holds out her hands to her side, blocking Grace and we all stare. Kyra is small, smaller than any of us, in fact, she could pass I swear as a teenager, barely five feet tall. She has the features of a China doll, and seems so quiet but this is a whole new side that none of us have really seen.

  “Spill,” she says, staring ahead at Grace. I laugh, but quickly cover my mouth with my hand.

  “Oh I love this girl,” Julian whispers at my side.

  “She is totally going to be a perfect addition to this group.” Chloe agrees, leaning back seemingly pleased with the outcome.

  With Gretchen on one side, and Kyra, staring down Grace at the other, there is no escape. She is pinned in behind the island in the center of the kitchen.

  “Terrance,” she yells and we all laugh simultaneously, besides Kyra who is still boring holes through poor Grace.

  “What are you hiding?” Kyra taunts, taking a step toward Grace. “I may not know you extremely well, but what I do know, is that you can’t lie.”

  Grace nods, biting her lip.

  “When are you due?” Kyra asks and Grace’s mouth falls open. Hers isn’t the only one.

  “Oh my God!” Gretchen squeals behind Grace making her jerk in response and spin around to face the rest of us.

  Her eyes fill with tears and suddenly she is nodding her head in agreement.

  “You’re pregnant?” I ask and again she nods.

  “My job here is done,” Kyra brushes her hands together and steps back rejoining us at the table.

  “Who are you?” I ask when she sits down and she laughs.

  “I think Garrett is wearing off on me, I was never this diabolical before I met him.”

  Squeals of excitement erupt and suddenly the guys are all hurrying into the kitchen to join us. The word quickly spreads and it's Rhett who moves in to give his sister a congratulatory hug. It's sweet really, as he pulls Terrance in to join them.

  “How did you know?” Chloe leans in to ask Kyra.

  “She’s the only one that hasn’t had even a sip of alcohol all night. Not to mention she’s continuously covered her nose when smelling things that don't agree with her.”

  “Observant.” Julian holds out his hand offering her a fist bump that she accepts.

  “Plus, there was a pregnancy test box in the bathroom garbage when I used theirs because the other one was occupied.”

  Julian and I look at each other, before bursting out in laughter.

  Kyra is going to fit in perfectly, she is as nosy as the rest of us. I can see why Garrett loves her so much. She seems so innocent, yet she is a sneaky little devil too.

  six

  Mike

  “Grace wants to tell Reed and Kori on Christmas,” Terrance says, sitting on the couch with a beer in hand. “She’s gonna have a t-shirts made with Papa and Mammie on the front and on the back have Blake and Brynnlee with their hand prints and then some plus sign or something with baby Taylor by it.”

  “Do you plan to have your running shoes on?” Rhett chuckles.

  “Like your dad doesn't know he’s doing things to his daughter.” Colton adds and Rhett’s gaze turns toward him.

  “Shit man, do you have to say it like that?” Rhett wrinkles his nose but his eyes are blazing with irritation.

  “Come on, we all know the two of them can’t stay dressed when they are alone.”

  “I’m two-seconds from tossing you in the pool out back.” The thing is I don’t think Rhett is joking. Somehow Colton has managed to reverse this on him. Then again his mouth is always going, using every opportunity he can to get a rise out of one of us, or all of us.

  “I’m sure they’ve done it in the pool too,” Rhett lunges at him and Colton chuckles as he falls back off the arm of the chair and hits the floor.

  “Come on,” he mumbles through his laughter.

  Suddenly the living room is full, with all the ladies wondering what in the hell is going on. Rhett tackles Colton and Terrance shakes his head, knowing the focus has moved on to something else.

  Leaning over I gain his attention and hold out my hand. He places his in mine, “Congrats, truly.” I offer him. “There is nothing like being a father, nothing at all.”

  I think of Sarah and how she held onto my neck and didn’t want to let go when we dropped her off to my parents. Until my mom bribed her with a cookie. I drove the entire way to Terrance and Grace’s teetering on turning back around to go get my girl. It breaks my heart to see her cry.

  “After my grandparents passed I never thought I’d ever have a true family again.” Terrance talks low enough that only I can hear. “Then I finally got my head out of my ass and got the girl. All I picture is filling this house with kids and laughter. I want to be the kind of father that mine wasn’t.”

  “You are nothing like that man.” I assure him.

  “Who’s ready for Pictionary?” Chloe holds up a bowl with what looks like little pieces of paper in it and gives it a shake. Just behind her is Julian, carrying an easel with an oversized white board and markers.

  Last year it was movie trivia and we all got schooled by Colton and Gretchen who seriously know their shit. Looks like I’m losing again this year because I can’t draw for shit.

  “Guys against girls,” Kyra suggests and my little brother grabs his fiancée’s waist and pulls her in close. Saying something to her alone that makes her cheeks redden in embarrassment. I smile, realizing he’s more like me than I thought.

  I still can’t believe that in a few weeks he’s getting married. It feels like just last week he was a cocky teenager throwing a fit because I beat him in an online battle.

  “I’m completely okay with guys and girls,” Julian claps his hands and I’m waiting for him to break out in song, he’s so fucking happy.

  “Settle down there Jules,” Gretchen pats his chest. “You pop your buckle and I’m out. I love ya big guy but none of us need to see how excited you are at the thought of being surrounded by all these men.”

  “I say we draw names for teams.” Landon hides behind Chloe, using her as a shield to block Julian. It’s hilarious to see how much Julian gets to Landon. We all know the guy is harmless but he has never tried to hide the fact that he finds us all attractive.

  “Okay teams,” Chloe laughs at her husband. “Three different teams and one team will gain Julian as a bonus.”

  The guy doesn’t even care that he is the fifth wheel, he owns it.

  For the next several hours we laugh to the point of tears. We drink and eat, and draw our themed pictures. The fucked up part of it is no matter what Colton picked out of the bowl, every picture had some part that looked more like a dick than anything else. I was beginning to think he was doing it on purpose. Santa riding a dick, a reindeer, eating a dick, a present that the bow resembled more of a dick than a bow, it was never-ending.

  “You all can leave and Colton and I can keep this game going,” Julian winks at Colt and he stares back at him, his jaw slacking and his eyes unreadable.

  “I’m good,” Colton tosses the marker to Rhett and walks toward the couch.

  “Oh, I’ve heard how good you are.” Julian teases him a little more.

  There is nothing better than watching the king of torment flustered and so unsettled he can’t seem to find the words to fight back. Julian is a handful, but he’s also hilarious.

  It’s after midnight when we pull into the driveway and I turn off the truck. Glancing over I find Maddison fast asleep.

  I watch her for a few minutes, all the lights on our house reflecting off the windows surrounding her. Mads stretches, sighs and her lips purse, but she remains sleeping. I know I could wake her, but instead I quietly open the door and move around the front of the truck.

  Doing my best not to wake her I open her door and then reach in, lifting her up and holding her close to my chest. The smell of her shampoo and the vanilla body spray she wears engulfs me.

  Maddison snuggles in closer, burying her nose in my shirt, I continue up the porch steps holding her securely.

  She doesn’t wake until we are inside and I am lowering her to the mattress, starting to remove her shoes.

  “I didn’t mean to fall asleep.” She whispers in the darkness and I lift my gaze to meet hers. “It was a lot of fun tonight.”

  “It was,” I agree as she holds my stare. The way her eyes droop and the purse of her lips reminds me of the lost look she gets when we make love. Maddison is incredible in every sense of the word.

  I still think about how close I came to losing her, and it kills me. I’ve seen things, I’ve done things, and those things haunt me. I still have dreams of the times I was overseas and the life I lived for those years. I have flashbacks, things I know I will regret for the rest of my life, but none of that compares to the ache I felt that day at the hospital.

  It hurt to breathe.

  My entire world was falling apart because she was lying in that hospital and there wasn’t a damn thing I could do to help her. I couldn’t take away the pain, I couldn’t heal her.

  I can honestly say that I’ve loved Maddison from the very moment I met her.

  Suddenly she lifts herself up and I watch as she grabs the hem of her sweater and slowly lifts it up and tosses it to the floor. “I don’t want to sleep,” she confesses, moving her hands to the waistband of her jeans. Slowly she unsnaps the button and begins to wiggle them over her hips and down her thighs. Reaching my breaking point, grabbing them I finish pulling them off.

  Maddison laughs when I hurry to take off my own, practically tripping over them in the process.

  Crawling up the bed, I lower my body over hers and cup her face. “Baby, I love you,” I whisper, offering her a soft kiss. “You’ve given me everything I could ever ask for.”

  “Not everything,” she replies and for a minute I only stare at her.” I didn’t want to take away from Terrance and Grace’s joy.”

  I feel like I can’t breathe.

  “I wanted to tell you this morning, but Sarah was cranky. Then the afternoon got away from us and then tonight, well,” she shrugs. “I took a test a week ago and then I wanted to be sure so I went and had a blood test to confirm.”

  I still have yet to say a word. My heart is racing but not because I’m scared.

  “Maybe it’ll be a boy.”

  “I don’t care either way,” I finally say. “I love being surrounded by my girls, so if we have ten of them, I’m okay with that.”

  I kiss her again, feeling like I'm floating. “You’re my best friend,” I tell her, “You are my everything, and you’ve given me more than I could have ever dreamed. And this...” I slide my hand over her stomach. Pausing, closing my eyes and taking in a deep breath. “It’s the best Christmas present you could have given to me.”

  We end our night getting lost in one another, celebrating the news of our growing family and me falling even more in love with my wife in the process.

  landon and chloe

  seven

  Landon

  This Christmas is a bittersweet one. It’s my daughter Allayah’s first Christmas but it’s also the first one we will celebrate without my father. We lost him to cancer just shy of six months ago and I can honestly say without Chloe and Laya, I don’t know how I would have made it through.

  My mother is slowly learning to live in a world without my dad in it. It’s tough, and she still has some pretty bad days. But my Aunt Joan is now living with her and together I think they help one another. Both have lost their husbands much too soon, but find the strength to continue on in the support of one another.

  It was hard to see the strong man I’ve always known dwindle away to nothing. My entire life he was the strong, a proud man, the protector of our family and then he got sick. He went from a two hundred plus pound man to barely one hundred. He was frail and it broke something inside of me to see him that way, but never once did he complain. Until his dying day he talked of how much he loved us all and how proud he was of the man I’d become.

  He met and fell in love with the woman I married, he accepted her as his daughter and then he met our daughter, just barely but he held her and kissed her forehead. He whispered how he’d always protect her even if she couldn’t see him and there was not a dry eye in the room.

  I love that we got those moments and I will treasure them always.

  I’ll admit I’m having a difficult time feeling the holiday spirit this year, but for my girls I’ll slap on a smile and I’ll sing Christmas carols with the best of them.